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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Should I Have Allowed Her? (25851 Views)
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Re: Should I Have Allowed Her? by Nobody: 7:45pm On Jan 22, 2015 |
mutter: For what it is worth, I liked your posts @ mutter Kinda classy Cheers ...and a happy New Year 1 Like |
Re: Should I Have Allowed Her? by damiso(f): 8:03pm On Jan 22, 2015 |
My last word on this.. Me am I not bothered about side chic, main chic , left chic, side chic I am not even bothered about if it was the other way round I.e. madam and hubby were the ones who went to mistress' s house or even if two male friends and one tiv, english ,one Chinese or thai person etc etc etc whatever. There is a reason I alluded to children's manners and that is because one of the main reason why we teach children not to accept things from strangers or even take things without asking is to teach them courtesy and delayed gratification well into adulthood. Of course there are different scenarios that could pan out but my point all along was seeking permission or respecting other boundaries and other people property. If we expect children to respect boundaries I don't get why we can't expect the same from adults.To me it does not even matter if I don't mind if same is done to me. In uni my friends used to borrow all my stuff all the time for parties and for some of my besties sef without permission.But me I will ask o I even rarely used to borrow people's stuff. I would say ' t is it ok if I use ur red purse' and I always used to get why are you asking naa but that's how I am. Now I am not saying there are no grey areas (esp when relationships and bonds have been built) but I honestly don't actually believe we are actually saying its ok to take something of someone we don't have a rapport without permission. And yes like I said earlier I get 'we' all don't mind but mine and others point has been more etiquette expected on the part of the guest. And I know we all say I will never go and sleep in a stranger's house that I won't be free but you can't tell in life.My mum was flying to Dubai once on Emirates and they had to have an emergency landing in Abu Dhabi.It was quite late and Emirates was trying their best to get them hotels but most were fully booked.Luckily she was travelling with her friend and that friend had a merchant who she was a very good customer to that had a house in Abu Dhabi.The man took them in for the night and they left for Dubai the next morning. He was a stranger to my mum and you can't be more paranoid than my mother.Her friend assured her and they gave them an ensuite room for the night.She came back to tell us stories of how accommodating arabs could be (me I told her u no know much arab dey make from alh ni ).So one can't always say what life throws at you. In my service yr, I stayed with people who my dad knew but in the true sense of it were strangers as I had never met them and they were very accommodating but I still took the cue of my hosts and respected myself.The wife told my dad later that she was so impressd. Everyone was just hung up on the nitty gritty of what the host did wrong and how they would NEVER do suchand skirted around the issue of if they would the same as the guest. Its all good sha and we are all different so we can't all see things the same way but on my own part sha I would NEVER go into the kitchen of someone I met the night before (even if we were cordial) and cook without permission. Get water maybe but cook.. lai lai.if I am hungry I will wait or go and buy food.besides I be ever ready I always have 1 or 2 cereal bars in my bag 6 Likes |
Re: Should I Have Allowed Her? by soulglo: 8:14pm On Jan 22, 2015 |
freecocoa: I never said it should be a yardstick. I am saying that the people who are pointing that out are willing to use that argument for the madam but not for her guest. That's my point. |
Re: Should I Have Allowed Her? by soulglo: 8:17pm On Jan 22, 2015 |
damiso: |
Re: Should I Have Allowed Her? by Spicylate(f): 8:28pm On Jan 22, 2015 |
Unionised:endure and ignore insult and disrespect in my own home, Godforbid. so that next time i will also endure it? mba nu. 4 Likes |
Re: Should I Have Allowed Her? by Unionised(m): 8:40pm On Jan 22, 2015 |
Spicylate: Look beyond your nose... 1 Like |
Re: Should I Have Allowed Her? by Spicylate(f): 8:56pm On Jan 22, 2015 |
Unionised:would have loved to but coach i dont know how to. 3 Likes |
Re: Should I Have Allowed Her? by Unionised(m): 7:24am On Jan 23, 2015 |
Re: Should I Have Allowed Her? by Nobody: 7:33am On Jan 23, 2015 |
Stop taring yoruba women with the same brush. Being paranoid and suspicious is your personal choice. I've met women that are so easy going you would think they're hippies. Or men. 1 Like |
Re: Should I Have Allowed Her? by Nobody: 7:54am On Jan 23, 2015 |
BoboYekini: Thank you. |
Re: Should I Have Allowed Her? by Spicylate(f): 8:11am On Jan 23, 2015 |
Unionised:abi ooo. |
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