Chillisauce:


So what would you have done to the guest? Warm her food by 5am and or ask her to wait until you get back from work?

Depends on the guest...

A 2-day guest who is not a relative, he/she waits till I make meals ( I will make effort to make them early)

A guest who is a relative, show him/her the kitchen and tell him/her what to prepare or options available to him/her to choose

He/she will be shown his/her room and the visitors' restroom where spare toiletries are made available.

In my world, guests do not ransack their hosts' kitchen uninvited.

bukatyne:


Depends on the guest...

A 2-day guest who is not a relative, he/she waits till I make meals ( I will make effort to make them early)

A guest who is a relative, show him/her the kitchen and tell him/her what to prepare or options available to him/her to choose

He/she will be shown his/her room and the visitors' restroom where spare toiletries are made available.

In my world, guests do not ransack their hosts' kitchen uninvited.

so when you are gone to work, she has to endure until you are back before eating lunch/dinner?
A simply 'no' should have suffice in this. You dont make to help someone by indirectly starving them.

Chillisauce:


so when you are gone to work, she has to endure until you are back before eating lunch/dinner?
A simply 'no' should have suffice in this. You dont make to help someone by indirectly starving them.

If I am going to work is a different stuff altogether.

I could make their lunch and they heat it when ready or I give them options of what is available...

Someone who I trust enough to leave at home alone is no longer considered a 'guest'.

kreamidiva:



Nne, gini bu "otu"?

otu bu mgbogi

I see one problem here MADAM;why?

-she didn't like the guest,she expected the guy alone and not with a lady.
-She already found an issue just because she is younger and married but the guest is not!How did the guest looked at you?How do you know that she was saying "how can i greet this small girl?"
-If you didn't want her in the morning in your kitchen,you should have show her the way to the kitchen before bedtime.


Now guest:

-I am sure she saw the attitude of the MADAM therefore her rude response-but still she was rude!
-The best thing to do in this situation was to leave the kitchen politely for MADAM and retrieve to your allocated room.


I am an early bird,so when i visit-i always go straight to the kitchen and clean up first thing.I can't help myself however i don't cook unless i ask for your permission.I don't even mind turning to a cook,a long as i and my man eat-we are all happy

Unionised:


So what's wrong with telling her husband to tell his friend to restrain his girlfriend?

Do you play chess?

Learn to plan like 3 moves ahead before taking action.

Ripple effect.

So who is apologising now?

So because she knows her 'right', and can't wait to exercise it, her peaceful home should ne sacrificed?

You try.

So wifey sees the girl in the kitchen, storms out to tell hubby that A B C is in the kitchen?

Do you think the husband would have paid her mind?

edwife:
I see one problem here MADAM;why?

-she didn't like the guest,she expected the guy alone and not with a lady.
-She already found an issue just because she is younger and married but the guest is not!How did the guest looked at you?How do you know that she was saying "how can i greet this small girl?"
-If you didn't want her in the morning in your kitchen,you should have show her the way to the kitchen before bedtime.


Now guest:

-I am sure she saw the attitude of the MADAM therefore her rude response-but still she was rude!
-The best thing to do in this situation was to leave the kitchen politely for MADAM and retrieve to your allocated room.


I am an early bird,so when i visit-i always go straight to the kitchen and clean up first thing.I can't help myself however i don't cook unless i ask for your permission.I don't even mind turning to a cook,a long as i and my man eat-we are all happy

You walk into someone's kitchen and start cleaning up I have heard it all lmao

bukatyne:


If I am going to work is a different stuff altogether.

I could make their lunch and they heat it when ready or I give them options of what is available...

Someone who I trust enough to leave at home alone is no longer considered a 'guest'.

A guest is a guest, now its another point whether you trust him or not.
For me to invite someone to my house, there must exist a degree of trust.
I will understand, if its a neighbors friend, who i dont really know and its trying to pass a night in my house. This one i will even lock you up in the sitting room.

But the guest i invited without a bullet in my head. Pls, feel free to put poison in my pot of soup
I will gladly die and go to heaven

mutter:


I am not a man
So all this trash you emptied here did not fall into my bin.

As a woman I strongly object to you calling that woman a Love peddler.
That is a young girl that was at the very worst deceived into believing she was in a serious relationship.
She was doing what most ladies and men do - having a relationship and hoping it would lead to marriage.
When I encourage women to have respect and be submissive, some women here cry out that I do not have regard for women, some even think I must be a man.
But I have so much regard for women that I respect them as women. I would never address a fellow woman as a LovePeddler.

Let me tell you something. Some very bad and useless girls out there have had the luck to be put in a mans house.
But believe you my there are so wonderful very decent girls out there that deserve it more than you and are much more respectable than you. That have a more decent relationship than your marriage.

she did not call her a love peddler. it was after everything that op got to find out she was not the main chick. if only the lady behaved well, op would have even changed her initial mindset towards her... I want to ask you a personal question... is that how you visit your husbands friends and assume lord of the ring in their wives' kitchen? nothing like ego here abeg. why didn't the girl wash plate if she really wanted to make things easier for the whole house....


its true that the op would have ignored her. but as humans, our brains are not wired to take the more sensible option at such scenarios

soulglo:


You walk into someone's kitchen and start cleaning up I have heard it all lmao

Yes,when i as a grown up woman ate in your house i always offer to clean up or wash the dishes-especially if you have a baby and no help.

If i wake up in the morning and find your kitchen a mess and the plate we used to eat from the previous night,YES i will clean.

edwife:


Yes,when i as a grown up woman ate in your house i always offer to clean up or wash the dishes-especially if you have a baby and no help.

If i wake up in the morning and find your kitchen a mess and the plate we used to eat from the previous night,YES i will clean.

How dare you clean without permission?

aisha2:
Na wa oh, so your husbands friend can decide that no one will disrespect his fling but your husband can let them disrespect his lawful wife in her house and even ask that she should apologise hmmmm.

Na wa oh. You owe non of the louts any apology arrant nonsense

Am not particular about the kitchen iss but as a guest people should be more polite.
However, I understand the lady's point of view, she may have wanted a peaceful weekend but the boyfriend possibly wanted a cheaper option hence her aggression and maybe woman of the house had probably been giving her condescending looks and all hence her reaction.

Anyway, if I were you I would be more concerned with my husband not standing up for me than anything else

I taya oh...
u sha dey tok true some times

Chillisauce:


How dare you clean without permission?

Ahahahha

Imagine o,even cleaning it's a problem....

So if i wake up before you and see the house upside down,i will just go back to my room and wait for madam to come out.I don't function well around dirt,sorry but i will clean especially if i and my man ate in your house.

Chillisauce:

Now this is a strong point.

The "side chick" knows how to run her show.
Poor madam. Next time, learn basic manners.

You don't go attacking your guest simply because she made a "mistake" or because they are "side chick" .


e don bite am for her big yansh

Be nice jare. It surely must hurt, while lowly side chick is getting apologies from boyfriend and even her husband Highly madam is made to probably kneel down and beg.

Meanwhile, in it seems everything is a ceremony here, how to eat, who dishes the food, who enters the kitchen. Someone came to my house and nearly had a heart attack because my husband went to the kitchen himself took his food and microwaved it then proceeded to fry eggs to add to his food. Apparently my husband is not supposed to " enter 'my' pot" why I asked. No reason apart from the fact that its my kitchen and my pots lol,I said none of it is mine oh, its all ours. She didn't understand why I would sit let my husband enter the kitchen take eggs and fry lmao. Am supposed to do a ceremony of setting the table. How is any of that an issue abeg chai, we like wahala

bukatyne:


So wifey sees the girl in the kitchen, storms out to tell hubby that A B C is in the kitchen?

Do you think the husband would have paid her mind?

So if he won't pay her mind then it means the issue isn't a serious one na

edwife:


Yes,when i as a grown up woman ate in your house i always offer to clean up or wash the dishes-especially if you have a baby and no help.

If i wake up in the morning and find your kitchen a mess and the plate we used to eat from the previous night,YES i will clean.

Of course you should offer to help clean up after your host has served a beautiful dinner but that was not what you said initially. You tried to clarify in your second line but........

soulglo:


Of course you should offer to help clean up after your host has served a beautiful dinner but that was not what you said initially. You tried to clarify in your second line but........

When you are a guest in someone's house don't you eat? every time a guest spend the night in your house,don't they eat?

i did not change nada.....me not going into details in my previous post does not mean i said it differently;yes i clarified it because you asked but for someone who did not ask,will still understand what i meant.

edwife:


Yes,when i as a grown up woman ate in your house i always offer to clean up or wash the dishes-especially if you have a baby and no help.

If i wake up in the morning and find your kitchen a mess and the plate we used to eat from the previous night,YES i will clean.

The wife never liked the girl. I think she hated the girl as soon as she walked it. In my opinion, this was the beginning of the problem
The wife is not a good woman and she is clearly the type of woman that respect other women based on whether you are wife, wife to be , girlfriend etc.
The wife is the type of woman that takes the kitchen too seriously.

The guest lacks manners not necessarily because she went into the kitchen, but because of her reply to the wife but then again it might be because of the treatment she received from the wife.

The husband's friend is a sensible man.

The husband is not the type of husband I would want to have.

.

babygirlfl:
The wife never liked the girl. I think she hated the girl as soon as she walked it. In my opinion, this was the beginning of the problem
The wife is not a good woman and she is clearly the type of woman that respect other women based on whether you are wife, wife to be , girlfriend etc.
The wife is the type of woman that takes the kitchen too seriously.

The guest lacks manners not necessarily because she went into the kitchen, but because of her reply to the wife but then again it might be because of the treatment she received from the wife.

The husband's friend is a sensible man.

The husband is not the type of husband I would want to have.

He took his mistress to a friend's house on his way to his wife. Just saying, don't know if that makes a difference.

bukatyne:


So wifey sees the girl in the kitchen, storms out to tell hubby that A B C is in the kitchen?

Do you think the husband would have paid her mind?

Yep.

Exactly that

carefreewannabe:


He took his mistress to a friend's house on his way to his wife. Just saying, don't know if that makes a difference.

Ehnnn poster never said wife she said family. Could be extended family.

babygirlfl:
The wife never liked the girl. I think she hated the girl as soon as she walked it. In my opinion, this was the beginning of the problem
The wife is not a good woman and she is clearly the type of woman that respect other women based on whether you are wife, wife to be , girlfriend etc.
The wife is the type of woman that takes the kitchen too seriously.

The guest lacks manners not necessarily because she went into the kitchen, but because of her reply to the wife but then again it might be because of the treatment she received from the wife.

The husband's friend is a sensible man.

The husband is not the type of husband I would want to have.

Lol you said it all, poster probably likes being called " Anty "

carefreewannabe:


He took his mistress to a friend's house on his way to his wife. Just saying, don't know if that makes a difference.

I did not see where the op stated that. If indeed he took his mistress to a friends house on his way to his wife, yes it does make a difference. In that case, he is not only a bad husband but also a disrespectful friend.

However, it won't make me disrespect the mistress especially if she does not know that she is just a mistress.

The reason I said he is sensible is because he left his friends house when he realised that the two women were having problems.

babygirlfl:



I did not see where the op stated that. If indeed he took his mistress to a friends house on his way to his wife, yes it does make a difference. In that case, he is not only a bad husband but also disrespectful friend.

However, it won't make me disrespect the mistress especially if she does not know that she is just a mistress.

The reason I said he is sensible is because he left his friends house when he realised that the two women were having problems.

Sorry, I got it all wrong.

Thanks Aisha2.

The OP is 100% at fault.

She was already on the defensive before the guest even said a word, She looked at me somehow, she felt she was older than me etc

You mean you decoded all these from her eyes and unspoken word? Some people are witches for real. And I hope you and your children never need help in life.

So your guest needs to eat at 5am and you wont wake up till 9am, the guest has to wait because this kitchen is Holy of holies that someone cant enter? I am sure, If the guest had come to your door at 5am to knock to ask for permission to use kitchen it would have been another fight

Na wa o. I now see why God doesnt elevate or bless some people beyond a certain limit. If youre a company owner or governor then some people wont even be allowed to breathe

veave:



otu bu mgbogi

amaghi m this one o.

U don spoil finish veave!

aisha2:


So if he won't pay her mind then it means the issue isn't a serious one na

That is a dangerous route to go o...

We know some husbands will never pay their wives mind even If it is a life and death issue

"I agreed to apologize to the friend but never his girlfriend. I got to understand that the girl is just his bedmate but to the girl, she thought she was the "everything".

Lol poster she is everything oh, she seems tp have power you don't have.
Chai women ohhhhhhh see wahala over egg kwa

I went back to the OP due to side chick/main chick saga...

The side chick is a skunk!

How can see dress indecently in a house where her bf's husband and family is?

The fact that the friend had the guts to bring his side chick to the martial home of his buddy speaks volumes.

He knew his friend would approve of his lifestyles and I jump to assume that the husband is also a cheating scumbag too.

bukatyne:


That is a dangerous route to go o...

We know some husbands will never pay their wives mind even If it is a life and death issue

Any man who wouldn't pay his wife mind in matters of life and death is not a husband abeg. Just a bed mate.

bukatyne:
I went back to the OP due to side chick/main chick saga...

The side chick is a skunk!

How can see dress indecently in a house where her bf's husband and family is?

The fact that the friend had the guts to bring his side chick to the martial home of his buddy speaks volumes.

He knew his friend would approve of his lifestyles and I jump to assume that the husband is also a cheating scumbag too.

The poster assumed she was a side chick I had to re read myself to understand. Madam just had beef and even if she was a side chick she has more respect from the men than madam main wife does

Chillisauce:


A guest is a guest, now its another point whether you trust him or not.
For me to invite someone to my house, there must exist a degree of trust.
I will understand, if its a neighbors friend, who i dont really know and its trying to pass a night in my house. This one i will even lock you up in the sitting room.

But the guest i invited without a bullet in my head. Pls, feel free to put poison in my pot of soup
I will gladly die and go to heaven

Biko don't go to heaven yet