joseph1832:
Of course you do. I've never doubted you m'lady. Why do you think I call you creme de la creme.

joseph1832:
Why do I have the feeling if we continue this, it might snow ball into a feminist discourse, and this, just like love, is a discourse I'd rather not have.

Thank you very much

Hahahaha. You know I've always said you are highly controversial and some how I like it when you contradict yourself too. Lol.

Just know women are good, just like men.

P.S I'm not a feminist in the African sense of that word by the way, I challenge half truths and African stereotypical mentality when there is need to.

amicable09:

Hahahaha. You know I've always said you are highly controversial and some how I like it when you contradict yourself too. Lol.

Just know women are good, just like men.

P.S I'm not a feminist in the African sense of that word by the way, I challenge half truths and African stereotypical mentality when there is need to.

Contradict myself? How? I've never for once opined or believe "women are bad" I have a mother, she's a woman. I'm staring at her right now and I just can't help but give her a wink. If I believe that, it mean I believe my mother is bad, and that is something she can never be.

Can you kindly elucidate on the 'African Sense' of feminism?

joseph1832:
Contradict myself? How? I've never for once opined or believe "women are bad" I have a mother, she's a woman. I'm staring at her right now and I just can't help but give her a wink. If I believe that, it mean I believe my mother is bad, and that is something she can never be.

Can you kindly elucidate on the 'African Sense' of feminism?

Lol. Keep up the good work. I can't talk feminism here else we'll derail this thread. But then, you are with your mum now, I thought you are close to 40 years of age from your update I read.

amicable09:

Lol. Keep up the good work. I can't talk feminism here else we'll derail this thread. But then, you are with your mum now, I thought you are close to 40 years of age from your update I read.

I'm in no way close to 40. And just so you know, my diary is a mixture of my thoughts, facts and fiction.

I leave you to discern what's fact, fiction and thought.

skytreader:


Getting married is a social responsibilty ke? So, the corollary is that you are socially irresponsible if you don't get married?
Weird reasoning.

Weird but true!

KashyBaby:



#thatsthefact
Only the truth will set someone free.

they have used and dumped this one, em pain am, with no one to talk, u will die out of frustration

Omotayor123:
Weird but true!

Being married is now being socialy responsible?? Interesting.

amicable09:

Lol. Very funny! The Nigerian society's choice is rather lopsided. Everyone at one time or the other under constant pressure have flared up in Public. Now, this is not something we attribute to singles alone, married people react to things in Public as well. To say because a lady is getting old and still unmarried, she should bottle up her emotions, she should never speak out, she should conceal, not feel and do not let the world know she's been chocked by their unnecessary demands and expectations from her, would make her "a woman of virtue" as you put it. Hilarious!

Women, I mean real women are not known for weakness. They exude strength. Show me one weak woman and I will show you 10 women who are down because a man, a weak man pulled them to the ground.

For one weak woman out there, there are 10 weaker men existing.

hmmmmm ....amicably philosophical! i dey feel u... I no fit talk plenty now but I don dey ground deliberately on many occasions make woman climb reach any height but refused. don't u think it s individual problem ni?

Omotayor123:
Weird but true!

Are you saying that people who prefer not to get married are PERCEIVED as being socially irresponsible? Or YOU are personally ASSERTING that they are?

Zceesneh:
they have used and dumped this one, em pain am, with no one to talk, u will die out of frustration

But surely u DIE FIRST coz u r NONSENSE! U and ur black stinky mouth will kill u...


Mtccchew!

joseph1832:
Hope you get laid? Cos I'll hate to see all that Filipino lushness go dormant and outdated?

And definitely that's none of ur damn biznez...


Move that ass somewhere else.

Babacele:
hmmmmm ....amicably philosophical! i dey feel u... I no fit talk plenty now but I don dey ground deliberately on many occasions make woman climb reach any height but refused. don't u think it s individual problem ni?

Hahahaha. I respect you sir!
Which woman see ladder no climb up? Did you just stay down without offering her a ladder and expected her to reach the top just like that?

amicable09:

Hahahaha. I respect you sir!
Which woman see ladder no climb up? Did you just stay down without offering her a ladder and expected her to reach the top just like that?

plenty ladder sef...

KashyBaby:




And definitely that's none of ur damn biznez...


Move that ass somewhere else.

Cheer up big momma. I was only being concerned. No need to go all feisty.

Wouldn't mind to move my ass down your way. It'll be a blast I assure you.

Babacele:
plenty ladder sef...

mmmh... must be an individual thing then

between being married and staying single in order to monitor your fellow human beings and gossip about their sex life, which does the op consider acceptable?

if you must monitor, does getting married prevent you from monitoring?

opeaceo:


What made it an African mentality??

dunno.

like non-Africans dont marry.


perhaps what makes it an "African mentality" is when authorities dont do something to provide husbands/wives if there's an imbalance.

For example, the Zamfara govt encourages single folks to get married and even sponsors the weddings and provides other incentives.

Overseas, govts will encourage immigration for similar purposes.

Yet some Nigerians will shout "African mentality" simply because they are too rich and comfortable spying on others, to want to consider marriage.

RadicallyBlunt:
Nigerians overrate marriage that's the issue. Although it has advantages but has demerits too. Its like sweet honey packed up in a swarm of deadly bees..how can one reach d honey? Actually God has blessed some women without marriage (although such women usually have their wealth traced to their father/family or father's connectivity) but actually too, for a woman to feel comfortable abt being single at 40, definitely there's an iota of bitterness in her.

Averagely a lady at early 20s is more enthusiastic about marriage than a guy of same age..it just means a lot to them that even d guys wonder if they can ever attain the financial level of whoever is making these ladies freak out and find marriage so appealing that they envy and talk abt their friends marriages till it appears as if a man who can't do such is a failure.

To now find such an lady at 40 with so much un-interest about marriage that she was once flakky about, definitely bitterness must have taken the enthusiastic heart over.

You are very daft

Na Africa you dey oo make u hear.

dude STFU.... kindly tell ur sistas nt to marry till they become 40 then watch the outcome #nonsense

opeaceo:


What made it an African mentality?? Every ill in our society is termed "African mentality". The phrase " African mentality " needs to come stand up for itself.

But that's exactly what it is!

KashyBaby:
Definitely I agree with this...in this wonderful paradise we called it "earth" ,marriage is not for everyone.. and so what if a lady will stay single for the rest of her life? Simply bcoz she doesn't want complicated things..

And not to mention, so many marriage are broken as well..why? Coz a lot of couple thought they married the right person or they were juz forced to marry someone they do not love...

#singleforlife

""in wizkid voice" yhust be bitter insyd

People that uses marriage to insult single successful people are not properly exposed and before you say otherwise about my comment you should always know that being exposed isn't about travelling the world and meeting people but opening your eyes to the changing dynamics of the entire human race as it concerns what is happening around us and all over the world.

The world is changing and if you don't change with it you'd be left behind and God forbid you should pass on the same mentality to your offspring - they will look odd even as religion supports being odd which I find really disappointing to an extent.
Cc
Doveda

joseph1832:
Now that's a thing of choice. I know many women who are married and are being battered by their husbands, yet, the chose to remain in such abusive marriage.

Now even I can't argue this. Yes I believe attitude is everything. I've lost count how many times I've seen and heard some women lament that they wish their kids have the influence of a father in their lives, that's after realizing at a stage that all children, need the influence of a father in their life.

Like I said earlier, a primordial society... I can successfully handle any single lady, I've never been a coward, just as long she doesn't wake up one morning and say "when are you going to propose to me?" Seen this one time too many.

I want to believe you're among the women who tow this line of thought.

Why don't you read her post again? This time, read and understand it

linda ikeji must have given you this to send here cus wiz nonsense kid abused her

masonkz:
I actually don't know if this is a global thing, but I've come to notice it a lot around people here, especially the guys.

You see a single woman that is successful at what she's doing, and then the next thing that comes to your mind is to start opining that she must be bitter cos she's in her 30s or approaching 40 and not married. These are the kind of people that feel that for a woman, marriage is the biggest achievement that can happen to her. That no matter what a woman has in life, if there's no marriage, then she's not made, not minding the fact that many married women are silently suffering in their marriage.

In turn, this same thought process goes on to affect the woman as she starts getting desperate and starts having a very low self esteem. The pressure gets to the point where they end up going from one church to the other and in so doing may fall into the prey of men solely looking out for these kind of women to exploit. Only those bold enough to shake off the society's expectation of a woman can actually hold their head high and not give a hoot about what anyone says.

Even women can be their own enemies when a married lady starts using another's singlehood to insult her. In my opinion, that is way below being petty. Now the trend is when people see fine pictures of single ladies on social media, the next question is "where is her husband?", "...who go marry this one wey don reach 30something?", "...too bad that she's this rich and fine with no husband"... poor reasoning I.M.O.

Ladies/Women, your first priority when it comes to happiness is yourself, and not to cater to the happiness of the society. Granted, you may have wanted to marry in your 20s, but if that isn't /wasn't the case, why go on killing yourself about it? Develop yourself the more, be beautiful to yourself, get that money rolling, the career moving, that business booming. If need be, get a baby papa and get yourself pregnant and train the child yourself!. If teenagers can have unwanted pregnancies and still see the child through childhood, successful women can surely do better!

While that last part may not lie well with many, my point still is that you shouldn't go through life thinking having a husband would be your guarantee to having a fulfilled life. Having a great family is beautiful, if you don't have one, align your priorities and have your options open as to what really you CAN DO to make yourself more happy with YOUR LIFE.


#okbye.

D post is large, All d comments re too large to read .

Summary or Next topic

I think generally people don't like successful people as they remind them of their failure.

Osigbemeh Julius Daniel
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Wizkid and Linda inspired post

masonkz:
I actually don't know if this is a global thing, but I've come to notice it a lot around people here, especially the guys.

You see a single woman that is successful at what she's doing, and then the next thing that comes to your mind is to start opining that she must be bitter cos she's in her 30s or approaching 40 and not married. These are the kind of people that feel that for a woman, marriage is the biggest achievement that can happen to her. That no matter what a woman has in life, if there's no marriage, then she's not made, not minding the fact that many married women are silently suffering in their marriage.

In turn, this same thought process goes on to affect the woman as she starts getting desperate and starts having a very low self esteem. The pressure gets to the point where they end up going from one church to the other and in so doing may fall into the prey of men solely looking out for these kind of women to exploit. Only those bold enough to shake off the society's expectation of a woman can actually hold their head high and not give a hoot about what anyone says.

Even women can be their own enemies when a married lady starts using another's singlehood to insult her. In my opinion, that is way below being petty. Now the trend is when people see fine pictures of single ladies on social media, the next question is "where is her husband?", "...who go marry this one wey don reach 30something?", "...too bad that she's this rich and fine with no husband"... poor reasoning I.M.O.

Ladies/Women, your first priority when it comes to happiness is yourself, and not to cater to the happiness of the society. Granted, you may have wanted to marry in your 20s, but if that isn't /wasn't the case, why go on killing yourself about it? Develop yourself the more, be beautiful to yourself, get that money rolling, the career moving, that business booming. If need be, get a baby papa and get yourself pregnant and train the child yourself!. If teenagers can have unwanted pregnancies and still see the child through childhood, successful women can surely do better!

While that last part may not lie well with many, my point still is that you shouldn't go through life thinking having a husband would be your guarantee to having a fulfilled life. Having a great family is beautiful, if you don't have one, align your priorities and have your options open as to what really you CAN DO to make yourself more happy with YOUR LIFE.


#okbye.

Sad to say but this warped mindset is usually found in women. To be specific, it is found in those women who would never have amounted to anything in life if they had to stand on their own two feet. These are the type of women who are consumed with envy when they hear of single, successful, self-made women.

skytreader:


Getting married is a social responsibilty ke? So, the corollary is that you are socially irresponsible if you don't get married?
Weird reasoning.

Like seriously,I actully like her datz why I decided not to reply.
If people think I'm weird because I'm not married,then people can shove their opinion where the sun dont not shine...
I have always and will always say this: Marriage does not guarntee one's happiness.