I need to go on my knees once again and thank God for the kind of husband he gave to me.

I pity you guys, once again I say I pity you guys.

For the past 3 weeks, I have been terribly sick unable to do a single thing in the house. I was in hospital for 5 days. My husband has cooked, cleaned, washed and done every single thing that needs to be done in the house.
Today is my first day back at work and this morning he organised my bathing water before I got out of bed, made my breakfast and packed my lunch for work. Does that make him less of a man?? Would that make me disrespect me?? He is 11 years older than me.

To our normal lives before I took ill, we both do the chores. I can't remember the last time I touched the Vacuum Cleaner. No one assigns any chores, we just do what we think is right. There are times he doesn't do anything for days but I don't ask him. The truth is he knows his responsibilities as a Husband.
I cook the soup, he makes the poundoyam
I clean the bathroom, he cleans the sitting room. Does that sound like I am being disrespectful!!
If you are not a lazy person naturally, you would always want to be involved with the house work! No matter how little. It all depends on Home Training sha!!

All you NL guys would still support the man that gives his wife 15k for housekeeping despite being able to afford more!! Where do you stand??

Why are you putting us all in one shoe? 

Ays,

Every man helps his wife in one way or another around the house. No man is gonna be idle and leave the house unkempt while the wife is ill. . . that's just plain stupid of him and equally weak. Thats not what we are talking about. The discussion is on a woman expecting. . . to put it more bluntly, assigning chores around the kitchen to her man. You cannot and must not assign chores to him in the kitchen and he is crazy if he obliges your demand to that end. If my sister did that to her husband we would have misunderstanding big time, trust me.

Stupid archaic Men!! Like I stated earlier if you can't do the dishes then refrain from using them simple! Your wife is not your housegirl, she can't cook, clean the house and same time do your damn dishes. What's wrong with easing the housework for your wife? You both have jobs that drain your energies by the time you get home but still she enters kitchen and cook for you so exactly what is wrong with you helping her even if it's just doing the dishes?

I feel sorry for the women that agree to marry some of you. Some of you African/Nigerian men are pathetic, insecure,weak evil men! You would rather see your wife struggle with housework than help her? Useless men! The women that marry you losers and tolerate this rubbish from you men are just as stupid as you all.

IgboGirl:

Stupid archaic Men!! Like I stated earlier if you can't do the dishes then refrain from using them simple! Your wife is not your housegirl, she can't cook, clean the house and same time do your damn dishes. What's wrong with easing the housework for your wife? You both have jobs that drain your energies by the time you get home but still she enters kitchen and cook for you so exactly what is wrong with you helping her even if it's just doing the dishes?

I feel sorry for the women that agree to marry some of you. Some of you African/Nigerian men are pathetic, insecure,weak evil men! You would rather see your wife struggle with housework than help her? Useless men! The women that marry you losers and tolerate this rubbish from you men are just as stupid as you all.

Your unnecessary rantings shows you have not been following this thread. There are Europeans, Asians and American men if we are not good for you ladies okay.

Pharoh:

Your unnecessary rantings shows you have not been following this thread. There are Europeans, Asians and American men if we are not good for you ladies okay.

You are never good for anything! I'm guessing my so called rantings like you put it is hitting home. Don't say "we" cos not all African/Nigerian men are like bunch of you on here. There are good and considerate Nigerian men that won't hesitate to help their wives in any way possible

IgboGirl:

Stupid archaic Men!! Like I stated earlier if you can't do the dishes then refrain from using them simple! Your wife is not your housegirl, she can't cook, clean the house and same time do your damn dishes. What's wrong with easing the housework for your wife? You both have jobs that drain your energies by the time you get home but still she enters kitchen and cook for you so exactly what is wrong with you helping her even if it's just doing the dishes?

I feel sorry for the women that agree to marry some of you. Some of you African/Nigerian men are pathetic, insecure,weak evil men! You would rather see your wife struggle with housework than help her? Useless men! The women that marry you losers and tolerate this rubbish from you men are just as stupid as you all.

This is quite a response full of venom. Meeeeeeeeennnnnn!!!!!!!! stair clear of this IgboGirl oooo. Frankly speaking, IgboGirl, you don't have to use vulgar words to express ur feelings or convey ur message. I believe it's a joke taken too far!!!! And I don't mind spanking ur ass for that!!!! (just kidding)

@Igbogirl,
Must you throw insults to make ur opinions known? I read your previous posts and they are all the same. Ranting away like a depressed woman.
God! Get a grip on yourself! We're not here to fight but to share our opinions.
And stop embarassing yourself!

IgboGirl:

Stupid archaic Men!! Like I stated earlier if you can't do the dishes then refrain from using them simple! Your wife is not your housegirl, she can't cook, clean the house and same time do your damn dishes. What's wrong with easing the housework for your wife? You both have jobs that drain your energies by the time you get home but still she enters kitchen and cook for you so exactly what is wrong with you helping her even if it's just doing the dishes?

I feel sorry for the women that agree to marry some of you. Some of you African/Nigerian men are pathetic, insecure,weak evil men! You would rather see your wife struggle with housework than help her? Useless men! The women that marry you losers and tolerate this rubbish from you men are just as stupid as you all.

cantell:

@Igbogirl,
Must you throw insults to make your opinions known? I read your previous posts and they are all the same. Ranting away like a depressed woman.
God! Get a grip on yourself! We're not here to fight but to share our opinions.
And stop embarassing yourself!

How can I possibly embarass myself on a message board? Are you for real? Are you one of the archaic men I was referring to? I feel sorry for your would be wife too.
Being nice to some of you men won't just cut it. How do you expect me to be nice to men that would rather see their wives suffer with housework than help her? Men like that deserve no respect!

*Hauwa*:

Ajengogo:

This is quite a response full of venom. Meeeeeeeeennnnnn!!!!!!!! stair clear of this IgboGirl oooo. Frankly speaking, IgboGirl, you don't have to use vulgar words to express your feelings or convey your message. I believe it's a joke taken too far!!!! And I don't mind spanking your ass for that!!!! (just kidding)

Oh no sweetie I will use vulgar words or even worst if I have to. Some Nigerian men and their ways of thinking make me sick.
The so called wife they vowed not to help with dishes probably have a more demanding job than them but yet she will rush home to cook for these men and they find it hard to help with doing dishes? I blame their mothers who didn't raise them right. If some mothers have taught their sons the importance of helping a woman out in the kitchen when necessary these boys here won't be making a big deal with doing dishes.

@Igbogirl,
It clearly shows you're a young girl desperately seeking for attention. You can say whatever you like. But being vulgar just makes your posts suck.
Read back and take a look at the posts of other ladies. Nkem di iche bu ajo afa.
Nne were nwayoo ka ofe roro aro zuoro anyi nri.(take am easy)

aysometin, there are better ways your 'considerate' husband can be of help to you besides honking down and playing houseboy!

Negro_Ntns:

Ays,

Every man helps his wife in one way or another around the house. No man is gonna be idle and leave the house unkempt while the wife is ill. . . that's just plain stupid of him and equally weak. Thats not what we are talking about. The discussion is on a woman expecting. . . to put it more bluntly, assigning chores around the kitchen to her man. You cannot and must not assign chores to him in the kitchen and he is crazy if he obliges your demand to that end. If my sister did that to her husband we would have misunderstanding b
ig time, trust me.

I totally agree with you, thats why I said in my post that :

No one assigns any chores, we just do what we think is right. There are times he doesn't do anything for days but I don't ask him. The truth is he knows his responsibilities as a Husband.

But for some guys to come here and say they can never lift a finger in the house no matter what is appalling.
The African man mentality of it is a taboo to do house work is one of the reasons why Africa is where it is today (backward)

George_D:

aysometin, there are better ways your 'considerate' husband can be of help to you besides honking down and playing houseboy!

My Broda I would just take it as a joke
In the western world where we have no Helps or younger ones to assist, what should he do?? leave the house smelly and dirty??or allow us to starve? or call me from the hospital to cook?? What better ways O?
It all boils down to Laziness, no hardworking human being (Male or Female) waits for another human being to do what He/She can do .
Toilet is dirty, pour Harpic in it and wash it, Does it make you less of a man??

still, ays west or no, there are better ways-and this is no joke!

George_D:

still, ays west or no, there are better ways-and this is no joke!

We know what your marriage would be like, MILITANT

LOL
Its going up a notch here it is.
Quodos to Igbogirl. I havnt read your previous postings, and I dont know whether you curse or use vulgar language, but youre hitting the nail on the head.
Half these men ranting about house work were simply brought up badly, and turned out lazy.
My brother is a spick and span character and cant be caught dead in an even 'partially dirty' home, so he cleans, when his wife has her hands full and I respect him for it, and it puts his wife on her toes, cos she doesnt want her husband coming back from work and pointing out what she didnt do. She knows he can cope with and without her even though he loves her to death, so she's constantly on her toes to make him happy.
You earn respect my brothers, you CANT demand it.

@Aysomething . . . The Lord has blessed you jare. You can count yourself lucky cos you found a man who's mother can be proud wherever she is, cos she brought her son up to be a MAN.
Not all these monkeys you have here shouting up and down. You people think all it takes to be a man is to shout and to go out and come back inside and say youve worked so food made by the house girl . . . . oh Im sorry, glorified housegirl you call your wife should be waiting on the table.
Meanwhile half those women have more demanding jobs and are trying just as hard as you to make ends meet.

Well sha, I'l continue to say it, women, bring up your sons to be men. Bring them up different. Teach them to be upright characters. If we all do our homework, the quality of nigerian men would improve!
Not this rubbish I read on NL everyday

If you think helping your wife especially a wife who contributes financially is a no no, you need your head examined. African men are quick to point out how unafrican it is to do house chores, do these men also realise that a true african must also provide all the needs of the family (food, clothing, shelter, education etc) without any expectation from his wife? If you want to be an African husband, then I want to be a truly African wife shikena.

Rosabelle:

LOL
Its going up a notch here it is.
Quodos to Igbogirl. I havnt read your previous postings, and I dont know whether you curse or use vulgar language, but youre hitting the nail on the head.
Half these men ranting about house work were simply brought up badly, and turned out lazy.
My brother is a spick and span character and cant be caught dead in an even 'partially dirty' home, so he cleans, when his wife has her hands full and I respect him for it, and it puts his wife on her toes, cos she doesnt want her husband coming back from work and pointing out what she didnt do. She knows he can cope with and without her even though he loves her to death, so she's constantly on her toes to make him happy.
You earn respect my brothers, you CANT demand it.

@Aysomething . . . The Lord has blessed you jare. You can count yourself lucky cos you found a man who's mother can be proud wherever she is, cos she brought her son up to be a MAN.
Not all these monkeys you have here shouting up and down. You people think all it takes to be a man is to shout and to go out and come back inside and say youve worked so food made by the house girl . . . . oh Im sorry, glorified housegirl you call your wife should be waiting on the table.
Meanwhile half those women have more demanding jobs and are trying just as hard as you to make ends meet.

Well sha, I'l continue to say it, women, bring up your sons to be men. Bring them up different. Teach them to be upright characters. If we all do our homework, the quality of nigerian men would improve!
Not this rubbish I read on NL everyday

My only postings on here are on pages 22 and 23. I didn't use vulgar! They are mistaking calling them STUPID for vulgar but hey that's their problem. I call a spade a spade. Some of these men are just pathetic.

cantell:

@Igbogirl,
It clearly shows you're a young girl desperately seeking for attention. You can say whatever you like. But being vulgar just makes your posts suck.
Read back and take a look at the posts of other ladies. Nkem di iche bu ajo afa.
Nne were nwayoo ka ofe roro aro zuoro anyi nri.(take am easy)

Seeking attention? That's a good but irrelevant one! The other ladies you speak of were probably being careful not to offend you men. I don't play like that. I call it as I see it not caring who gets offended. You men on here are beyond redemption. Any man who thinks it's wrong to help her woman do dishes is a loser! Are you a loser? Do you fall in the category of men I speak of?

@ Prince

You still haven't proved why men are natural leaders.

IgboGirl:

Seeking attention? That's a good but irrelevant one! The other ladies you speak of were probably being careful not to offend you men. I don't play like that. I call it as I see it not caring who gets offended. You men on here are beyond redemption. Any man who thinks it's wrong to help her woman do dishes is a loser! Are you a loser? Do you fall in the category of men I speak of?

And how many losers can you possibly count on nairaland hoping you have spoken with all of them right? There is no modern Nigerian man who does not help his wife domestically if you don't know that so get it now. The keyword is helping your wife domestically should not be substituted with designation or drawing up roasters.

michelin89:

@ Prince

You still haven't proved why men are natural leaders.

You know the answer and i believe you are just itching for a debate.

Pharoh:

And how many losers can you possibly count on nairaland hoping you have spoken with all of them right? There is no modern Nigerian man who does not help his wife domestically if you don't know that so get it now. The keyword is helping your wife domestically should not be substituted with designation or drawing up roasters.

If that is the case then why are these immature boys crying over doing dishes

You know what all these guys in here are deceiving us. If u see them at home you will all be surprised cos they will sweep, clean and even polish the cooker Poster inclusive

Pharoh:

You know the answer and i believe you are just itching for a debate.

Nah i don't know. I am a woman so I am intellectually weak. I am only good at washing plates and cleaning and making children.

michelin89:

Nah i don't know. I am a woman so I am intellectually weak. I am only good at washing plates and cleaning and making children.

Why are you going to that angle? Your post just exposed you that you are not a novice but very well prepared for this challenge.

Okay, so which women are you exactly referring to here? Our mothers or our ladies?

IgboGirl:


If that is the case then why are these immature boys crying over doing dishes

I would have asked you to look at this reply below but i am doubting the credibility of the poster.

Luvlgenius:

You know what all these guys in here are deceiving us. If u see them at home you will all be surprised cos they will sweep, clean and even polish the cooker Poster inclusive

Okay i would not like to think that i am speaking for myself, but i believe there are other men like me. Most of these men here will be bachelors before they get married and they were doing all these stuffs before getting married so why should they stop when the wife comes in?.

I live alone right now and i do everything from the market to cooking to cleaning my home and any man who does not do some of this things when married probably was not trained for that or he is still living with the African man mentality. A man should help his wife willingly and when i mean willingly i am saying willingly enough.

I think the example @rosabelle gave is a very good example of what i think it should be like. The catch is there you don't have to tell him like you are giving him a task or command, there are unique ways you pass your message across to your husband .

But in saying all these i believe there are still men who will still live the traditional way but i don't know the percentage though but i think with education and exposure things will get better. But it is not an avenue for you to call us names na you know we are men and we cherish our ego's a lot.

Pharoh:

I would have asked you to look at this reply below but i am doubting the credibility of the poster.

Okay i would not like to think that i am speaking for myself, but i believe there are other men like me. Most of these men here will be bachelors before they get married and they were doing all these stuffs before getting married so why should they stop when the wife comes in?.

I live alone right now and i do everything from the market to cooking to cleaning my home and any man who does not do some of this things when married probably was not trained for that or he is still living with the African man mentality. A man should help his wife willingly and when i mean willingly i am saying willingly enough.

I think the example @rosabelle gave is a very good example of what i think it should be like. The catch is there you don't have to tell him like you are giving him a task or command, there are unique ways you pass your message across to your husband .

But in saying all these i believe there are still men who will still live the traditional way but i don't know the percentage though but i think with education and exposure things will get better. But it is not an avenue for you to call us names na you know we are men and we cherish our ego's a lot.

Men like you make me proud and that was the reason why I used "some men" in all my postings cos I know not all men reason like the poster of this thread. you are one of the good and considerate men i talked about.

Una never comot?  You still dey look for boi boi to come do your dishes heh?  

michelin89:

Nah i don't know. I am a woman so I am intellectually weak. I am only good at washing plates and cleaning and making children.

Please don't underestimate the power of a woman.