I don't know what the ladies on NL are trying to defend. All i know is that Naija girl will never tell you yes at first, even when she has been dreaming of you b4 then

Maybe u didn't toast her well enuff so u had 2 get burnt. . .

stillwater:

Sad truth though. But poor men do get married in Naija or don't they?

Yes, the majority of poor men in Nigeria get married to those one who don't snub or bluff men.

I know of a friend of mine who said that: "Until Nigerian ladies begin to accept flowers in place for money like the white ladies do abroad, then Nigerian men will become romantic,pleasant and respectful as the white men are to their ladies.

Pweety4me:

Maybe u didn't toast her well enuff so u had 2 get burnt. . .

I don't think so, the best response you could get is [size=18pt]Give me time[/size]

oluclem:

I don't know what the ladies on NL are trying to defend. All i know is that Naija girl will never tell you yes at first, even when she has been dreaming of you b4 then

WORD !!

Decryptor:

"Until Nigerian ladies begin to accept flowers in place for money

LOL

'Their Toasters' ke?
Them be bread?

On a more serious note, both parties have got their faults,
some guys are just perverse and some girls are just uncouth

@oluclem, so how is a lady who is genuinely not interested in you supposed to get that message to you?

There is a difference between toasting and harrasment.

it's not easy to politely tell some guys no because they take your politeness as a sort of agreement. also, guys really need to know when toasting turns to pestering. however, i think it's immature to actually insult a guy, especially if you're playing hard-to-get and not just irritated at his pestering. i've only insulted a guy once, i was a teenager then and he always acted in public like we were dating, even acting jealous. i found it all very embarrassing and usually insulted him (defense mechanism, i guess), but i was never interested in him. i would never insult or be rude to a guy i'm remotely interested in though.

It depends on your approach.
Don't be trying to grab a woman's backside whilst or before approaching, okay?

Sorry o

londoner:

@oluclem, so how is a lady who is genuinely not interested in you supposed to get that message to you?

There is a difference between toasting and harrasment.

Her word must go alongside with her reaction/action i.e her action must not betray her response.

From the comments of some  girls  on this thread, all I can say is na waa. If a guy walks away when Naija girls say no, many, if not most, Naija girls will be single, because "No" means "Yes" for many Naija girls, and many guys have evolved to being persistent even when a Naija girl tells them "No," because in their minds, "No" means "Yes." And if the guy walks away immediately the girl says "No," it is these same girls who will accuse the guy of not being persistent and weak, and that he surrenders easily.  If the guy now tries not to give up easily and is being persistent, some of you girls will label him perverted and seize that opportunity to insult him. And mind you, some girls will rain insults on a guy in whom they are interested.

The problem now is that when Naija girls  play hard to get and say "No" to guys in whom they are interested, and these same girls say the same "No" to guys in whom they are not interested, how is the approaching guy supposed to know when he is being truly rebuffed when a girl tells him "No?" And why don't you just ignore a guy who pesters you rather than rain insult him when he toasts you? That seems like a civilized and mature way of responding to a toaster who is a pester.

The confusion continues.

faakay:

True men are meant to accept rejection.

Why do you have to insult them? can you give me a good reason for this?

It is better to respond back in a polite manner or ignore him if you don't have anything to do with him.

You insult those that insult you and respect those are polite to you. That's the logic

Anyway girls they look faz b4 dem dey insult guyz, levels dey, no girl fit insult me sha,  cos i talk politely and I have respected her, if she misyarn, men,  i go abuse am hen. chei,  she will regret knowing me 

Trust me, they know better 

Typical of some male species. . .and that makes you what? Better than the lady insulting you?

Anyways I dnt give dudes like you a first look talk less of a second look!

What manner of toasting are we talking about? Though some ladies are uncouth but what do we say to men that only see women as sex objects thereby implying all sorts of rubbish all in the name of toasting. Lets be realistic, most us men are never genuine in our intentions and any lady that is worth her salt will never say yes the first time. Abi whats the essence of being a lady if she cant say no the first time though we know majority mean yes with their nos. However a responsible man with style will always get a lady attention without receiving insults! A lady will not insult a man unless he calls for it. WHATS YOUR STYLE?

ThoniaSlim:

Typical of some male species. . .and that makes you what? Better than the lady insulting you?

Anyways I dnt give dudes like you a first look talk less of a second look!

Don't be too harsh.

I don't insult them I just ignore them!  Some guys that know that they don't have chance at all, can make any lady insult them.  For example, I was coming from church and one guy can't on trying to holla, and he is short as hell, so I lied that I am 16.

Some guys can be so rude and nasty when they are trying to toast, that the dude will lucky if doesn't get a dutty slap.

the funny thing is that guys who toast naija chicks in a civilised fashion often wind up being derided by the chicks for being 'gentleman' or mugu - unless na hardcore butta u are toasting. . .

i remember one dude who was toasting this girl  - na so dem dey call the guy expired biscuits

anothr one ehen - the girl no gree - and she was bragging - i have the guys heart in my hand and i can twist it whenever i want to

you chciks

we all know those funny stories - guy gos to chicks room with chocs or some such - girls all gather to yab him - whats this rubbish you're bringing ceremoniously throw it in the bin - humilated guy leaves - finds he forgot his keys goes back to find the shakara biashes chopping the 'rubbish'  

oyb:

the funny thing is that guys who toast naija chicks in a civilised fashion often wind up being derided by the chicks for being 'gentleman' or mugu - unless na hardcore butta u are toasting. . .

i remember one dude who was toasting this girl - na so dem dey call the guy expired biscuits

anothr one ehen - the girl no gree - and she was bragging - i have the guys heart in my hand and i can twist it whenever i want to

you chciks

we all know those funny stories - guy gos to chicks room with chocs or some such - girls all gather to yab him - whats this rubbish you're bringing ceremoniously throw it in the bin - humilated guy leaves - finds he forgot his keys goes back to find the shakara biashes chopping the 'rubbish'

lol

Princek12:

From the comments of some  girls  on this thread, all I can say is na waa. If a guy walks away when Naija girls say no, many, if not most, Naija girls will be single, because "No" means "Yes" for many Naija girls, and many guys have evolved to being persistent even when a Naija girl tells them "No," because in their minds, "No" means "Yes." And if the guy walks away immediately the girl says "No," it is these same girls who will accuse the guy of not being persistent and weak, and that he surrenders easily.  If the guy now tries not to give up easily and is being persistent, some of you girls will label him perverted and seize that opportunity to insult him. And mind you, some girls will rain insults on a guy in whom they are interested.

The problem now is that when Naija girls  play hard to get and say "No" to guys in whom they are interested, and these same girls say the same "No" to guys in whom they are not interested, how is the approaching guy supposed to know when he is being truly rebuffed when a girl tells him "No?" And why don't you just ignore a guy who pesters you rather than rain insult him when he toasts you? That seems like a civilized and mature way of responding to a toaster who is a pester.

The confusion continues.

i think girls really shouldn't say no to guys they are interested in because the guy might just take their word. some girls say something like "i need time" or "let's see how things go" when they are interested. but even if a girl tells you no, you can tell her mind from the excuse she gives. and if you really don't know and want to keep finding out, it might help if you stop asking her out. just hang around and try to get to know her, somewhere along the line you'd find out what she really wants. my experience is many guys (NOT ALL) don't want to take time to get to know the girl on a platonic level first, but sometimes that's what girls want because they don't want to commit to you till they really know you.

oyb:

the funny thing is that guys who toast naija chicks in a civilised fashion often wind up being derided by the chicks for being 'gentleman' or mugu - unless na hardcore butta u are toasting. . .

i remember one dude who was toasting this girl  - na so dem dey call the guy expired biscuits

anothr one ehen - the girl no gree - and she was bragging - i have the guys heart in my hand and i can twist it whenever i want to

you chciks

we all know those funny stories - guy gos to chicks room with chocs or some such - girls all gather to yab him - whats this rubbish you're bringing ceremoniously throw it in the bin - humilated guy leaves - finds he forgot his keys goes back to find the shakara biashes chopping the 'rubbish'  

lol is this a personal story. talk true brother

i think the point in all this is knowing where to strike the right balance - a guy who respects himself should never pester a lady coninously - as a guty when you toast a girl the first time and she says 'no' - sit back and watch her reaction - it is her reaction that would decide if you should make a second move or not - or sometimes if the first 'no' is so emphatic that should tell you that you don't need to make a second move

for the ladies - it's only safe to say only someone from a low class or someone who lacks confidence will resort to insulting a guy -

just like the example i used earlier
: toaster: ngozi, you are fine o!
ngozi: you are mad!

the only mad person in this scenario is ngozi because the toaster has not done anything wrong - ngozi is the one whose behaviour is out of place

bawomolo:

lol is this a personal story. talk true brother

naaa  

unilorin chicks no too dey form like that at least when i was there - thats a unilag story


i knew the expired biscuits dude tho

was my classmate

guy na big boy in glo now - no more dissing from chicks

y'all just need to do hit the books get the grades and the good paying job - and a lot of all this shakara will be a thing of the past - a distant memory

bawomolo:

lol is this a personal story. talk true brother

so funny!

oyb:

the funny thing is that guys who toast naija chicks in a civilised fashion often wind up being derided by the chicks for being 'gentleman' or mugu - unless na hardcore butta u are toasting. . .

i remember one dude who was toasting this girl - na so dem dey call the guy expired biscuits

anothr one ehen - the girl no gree - and she was bragging - i have the guys heart in my hand and i can twist it whenever i want to

you chciks

we all know those funny stories - guy gos to chicks room with chocs or some such - girls all gather to yab him - whats this rubbish you're bringing ceremoniously throw it in the bin - humilated guy leaves - finds he forgot his keys goes back to find the shakara biashes chopping the 'rubbish'

LOL

While i agree that some Nigerian men have no etiquette when it comes to approaching a lady ,I must also say that Naija girls too like forming. I remember an incident once when I was still in LASU ,I went to alaba market with my girlfriend to buy an HiFI system for my hostel. As soon as we got to the market ,these traders started pulling my girl by the hand ,I wanted to do something but I could not because I realized that I was outnumbered. I told my girl to chill and just hold her temper but these Alaba monkeys will not relent and one dumb naughty person made the mistake of  tapping my girl on the azz. As an active LASUITE my reaction was instant ,I kicked the sucker in the nuts with my tims and needless to say ,his friends rushed me.

Lucky for me(and trust me I was very lucky that day) , a few of my school friends were also in the market at that time and they joined in the brawl which lasted a few minutes until one of the “market elders” stopped the fight. We were taken to the Alaba Traders Association office where both parties narrated their side of the story. The elders in the market sided with us and ordered that the boy’s shop(the offender) be locked for some hours as punishment for tapping my girl’s behind. I went home with a couple of bruises by my pride intact.
___________________________________________________________________

On the other hand I experienced a situation where my friend was severely humiliated at moremi hall in unilag, My friend had parked his vehicle close to the hall and we walked to the hostel ,we found some chicks out side  and my friend approached them. But my friend had barely said hello when one of the girl bust out and in her own words :  “abeg abeg ,waka far , na us you wan come toast .See this yeye scrub wey no get levels.”

My friend was frozen to the spot unable to even open his mouth and everybody was looking at him (me ,I  quickly retracted my steps to a very safe distance).I will never forget that day. My friend was traumatized for like 3 hours after that. You know when I look back at it now ,I realize that those chicks were not even solid babes ,they are this regular Naija girls with beautiful face, antelope legs and flat azz.

Any Nigerian guy who has been to Yankie or Southern African countries like Tanzania , Angola ,Swaziland ,South Africa ,Zimbabwe ,Namibia and Mozambique will know that most Naija girls no too set in terms of legs and yansh. Na so so K-leg full naija with pelebe yansh. And the funny thing is these girls from Yankie and Southern Africa no dey form. If a chick in SA spots you in a club and likes you ,she will walk up to you and tell you point blank that : “Damn you are fine”  or  “I won‘t mind hooking up with you” .Just like that no forming no need to buy KFC or Mac Donalds and it does not mean that they are cheap either, they are just real straight forward chicks who don’t like to beat around the bush.

So in conclusion, it is 50-50 ,some Naija boys too razz while some Naija girls too dey overform .The recent Big Brother Africa Revolution show is an example of how Naija girls rate in Africa, you see Nkenna’s face like an old leather bag and Geraldine’s teeth. Chai na shovel be that o! Those two girls no suppose form for anybody at all!

(I know I will receive “HEAVY” insults from Naija girls now )

flashgeek:

While i agree that some Nigerian men have no etiquette when it comes to approaching a lady ,I must also say that Naija girls too like forming. I remember an incident once when I was still in LASU ,I went to alaba market with my girlfriend to buy an HiFI system for my hostel. As soon as we got to the market ,these traders started pulling my girl by the hand ,I wanted to do something but I could not because I realized that I was outnumbered. I told my girl to chill and just hold her temper but these Alaba monkeys will not relent and one dumb naughty person made the mistake of  tapping my girl on azz. As an active LASUITE my reaction was instant ,I kicked the sucker in the nuts with my tims and needless to say ,his friends rushed me.

Lucky for me(and trust me I was very lucky that day) , a few of my school friends were also in the market at that time and they joined in the brawl which lasted a few minutes until one of the “market elders” stopped the fight. We were taken to the Alaba Traders Association office where both parties narrated their side of the story. The elders in the market sided with us and ordered that the boy’s shop(the offender) be locked for some hours as punishment for tapping my girl’s behind. I went home with a couple of bruises by my pride intact.
___________________________________________________________________

On the other hand I experienced a situation where my friend was severely humiliated at moremi hall in unilag, My friend had parked his vehicle close to the hall and we walked to the hostel ,we found some chicks out side  and my friend approached them. But my friend had barely said hello when one of the girl bust out and in her own words :  “abeg abeg ,waka far , na us you wan come toast .See this yeye scrub wey no get levels.”

My friend was frozen to the spot unable to even open his mouth and everybody was looking at him (me ,I  quickly retracted my steps to a very safe distance).I will never forget that day. My friend was traumatized for like 3 hours after that. You know when I look back at it now ,I realize that those chicks were not even solid babes ,they are this regular Naija girls with beautiful face, antelope legs and flat azz.

Any Nigerian guy who has been to Yankie or Southern Africans countries like Tanzania , Angola ,Swaziland ,South Africa ,Zimbabwe and Namibia and Mozambique will know that Naija girls no too set in terms of legs and yansh. Na so so K-leg full naija with pelebe yansh. And the funny these girls from Yankie and Southern Africa no dey form. If a chick in SA spots you in a club and likes you ,she will walk up to you and tell you point blank that : “Damn you are fine”  or  “bro I won‘t mind hooking up with you” .Just like that no forming no need to buy KFC or Mac Donalds and it does not mean that they are cheap either, they are just real straight forward chicks who don’t like to beat around the bush.

So in conclusion, it is 50-50 ,some Naija boys too razz while some Naija girls too dey overform The recent Big Brother Africa show is an example of how Naija girls rate in Africa, you see Nkenna’s face like an old leather bag and Geraldine’s teeth. Chai na shovel be that o! Those two girls no suppose form for anybody at all!

(I know I will receive “HEAVY” insults from Naija girls now )

analyzer

bawomolo:

lol is this a personal story. talk true brother

This happened to moi in UNILAG but it wasn't chocolates, it was SUYA.
I turned up late for a date and the witch in question threw temper tantrums, i left the SUYA i brought with me on her table and she threw it in a bin(still wrapped though). I left the room and went back to pick up something i cannot remember now and alas. . . .The whole crew were devouring the SUYA.

~Sauron~:

This happened to moi in UNILAG but it wasn't chocolates, it was SUYA.
I turned up late for a date and the witch in question threw temper tantrums, i left the SUYA i brought with me on her table and she threw it in a bin(still wrapped though). I left the room and went back to pick up something i cannot remember now and alas. . . .The whole crew were devouring the SUYA.

No mind dem ,na so dem go dey form like say dey no dey mess.

, Guess its Just the Ignorant 1s , But they really need to get their act together ,

flashgeek:

No mind dem ,na so dem go dey form like say dey no dey mess.

Emperor Flashgeek Olu, wetin u dey do here?