theButterfly:
Many people take longer than that to move on if they so much loved their spouse. I've a friend in Nigeria whose mother refused to re-marry after the loss of her husband years ago and single-handely raised all 5 of her kids. I was watching Dr. Phil some weeks ago and this man who lost his wife 7 years ago is just starting to date again.

That said, people are different and grief differently. This lady shouldn't be faulted for wanting to re-marry now if she chooses. She already moved on months ago when she started dating the new man, lol. To be fair, if she were a man, people around him would be urging him to move on and find another wife asap.

This are some of the reason most men hide their wealth from their wife, they hardly even put their wife presence in their will...


18minths - 3months... Now is obvious she didn't even mourn the husband up to a year

Ryan03:
People grief differently. Because mrs A griefed for 10years doesn't mean mrs B must grief for same number of years. Why exactly do we monitor how long people grief? Are we happy seeing them in that state? I thought relatives and friends are to comfort them and help them move on?

It's not about grieving it about if you loose your husband there are few things to put in their respective perspectives and time is key, then finding another love and moving on to marry this new found love also takes time even if the person is already on standby even while your husband was alive so it's natural for the family to protest.
Put it this way that a child is a wizard and can solve and pass WAEC or jamb while in primary school the child still has to go through the routine of secondary school because it is called training for talent is never enough it has to undergo refining.

Davash222:
Just 18 months after the death of her 'beloved' husband, she wants another dicck..



Women summarised!!

Kumuyi, a revered man of God got married about a year after. If I love her so much I will want her to move on asap.

A good dead husband would wish for his wife to remarry again but to a good man. Having someone else doesn't mean you have forgotten the past. Men move on in 3 months. Let's stand with grieving people. You're never in their shoes

Logobenz1:
Look there is an undertone to everything bro.
Do you know what love is?if you love a person,moving on won't be that easy!
That's why the dead man's family is protesting because it kind of tells them the woman did not love their brother enough.
I remember 2008 when the first woman I ever loved left for France for studies.God I cried,did not date any other person till 2014 or so...
Love is not that easy to move on from.

So must everyone follow your path?
Op tell her to contact a human rights lawyer. Once court gives their injunction, she should marry. Kile big deal?

That’s too early bro, his death should be investigated all over again.

Mehn, my uncle died in 2001 and then his wife was still very young with one kid, very beautiful woman that turns head in the street even till now, if to say no be my late uncle wife ehn..
Till now she is still single

Ryan03:
Let Her Go

I just want to write this short post hoping it will change someone's mentality base on the issue i'm about to discuss.

A lady at my place of work lost her husband almost 1yr 6months ago, now, she is about 3months pregnant and wants to get married but the backlash she is receiving eh? Her late husband's people have been frustrating her saying it is too early to get married (i thought marriage is till death do us part?), why are they trying to control her life simply because she was once married to their brother?

I want to believe the family members of this man have moved on with their lives since the death of their son, why then do you want to lock her up in mourning? The surprising part of it is that even women at the office are against her, some who have also lost their husbands are citing instances of how they watied 7years before re-marrying and so on.

I felt bad for her, all she do now is to cry, and mind her business. This is so wrong, free that young lady, she didnt do wrong in marrying your kinsman.

She is free to move on. But if she wants to be free in her second marriage she should relinquish all privileges accorded her by her late husband.

Jacqueline Kennedy, JF Kennedy's widow, lost all privileges she enjoyed from marrying her husband when she remarried including a life time Secret Service cover.

I believe if she does that no one will raise an eyebrow. Bringing a stranger to enjoy the late man's wealth might be the reason for the antagonism.

nerorex01:
My opinion on this issue is that 1 year is too short to start dancing around others d*ck. Love is very strong and deep like the spirit world. Some peoples husband died and they refused to get married but I am not saying she should do same but having an unprotected sex after the demise of your lovely husband sounds weird. Above all, she's got her life to live,

that's why our vows are TILL DEATH. no added time. let's stop being barbaric against the female folks. most men will not hesitate to unleash their dick else where.

her choice her call, at least konji would not live her now������;-);-);-);-);-);-):-P

Ryan03:
The said husband died in a car crash. Let me put this question to you, how long should it take for one (man/ woman) to get over a loved one? kindly state if this rule is for women only. PS she's my colleague and way older than me, her husband to be works at board of I.revenue

3 years minimum

Ryan03:
She have a son for her late husband, yes he died at the spot. I Dont know how you want me to have answers to the remaining questions. A virtuous woman you say, truely, we are victims of our belief (your signature)

You get time ooo

The Op is very naïve. A lady at your workplace lost her husband and in less than a year she took in for another man and you came here seeking for justification. If i may ask what's your business in someone's promiscuous private life or are you the one responsible for the pregnancy?
Promiscuous not because she wants to remarry but because no form of bride price was paid by the second man notwithstanding that she once married to the deceased. Till death do us apart vow doesn't justify a widow to be having extramarital affair simply because the husband is gone.
The family of the lady should return the brideprice paid by the deceased if the union produced no offspring so that she could remarry. That she should have done before conceiving for another man which may potray her as a promiscuous woman who feels no remorse for the death of her husband.

Jfyzee:



@OP you are feeling pity for the said lady because the man involve is not your uncle or related to you in anyway. Assuming the man is your uncle, will you con dole this lady attitude towards him..?

Just a year and six months she's already pregnant for another man. Who does that by the way..? The in-laws have the right to act the way they are acting now.. unless you want to tell us the baby she's carrying is yours the reason you're defending her.

Kindly put sentiment and feelings aside and tell her she did wrong with her action. Her action is questionable already as to the death of her husband. Both she and her impregnator should be seriously questioned.

What a woman indeed

Will all this bring back d dead uncle?

Ryan03:
Let Her Go

I just want to write this short post hoping it will change someone's mentality base on the issue i'm about to discuss.

A lady at my place of work lost her husband almost 1yr 6months ago, now, she is about 3months pregnant and wants to get married but the backlash she is receiving eh? Her late husband's people have been frustrating her saying it is too early to get married (i thought marriage is till death do us part?), why are they trying to control her life simply because she was once married to their brother?

I want to believe the family members of this man have moved on with their lives since the death of their son, why then do you want to lock her up in mourning? The surprising part of it is that even women at the office are against her, some who have also lost their husbands are citing instances of how they watied 7years before re-marrying and so on.

I felt bad for her, all she do now is to cry, and mind her business. This is so wrong, free that young lady, she didnt do wrong in marrying your kinsman.

Nonsense. She has her life to live. She should move on and marry whoever she wants to marry.....they can do nothing.

As long as she has the support her new fiance and family.

Meanwhile, did she have kids with her late husband? Not that it is relevant to this decision though.

BlackPantherxXx:


I hate to break this to you bro....

You just gave yourself unnecessary KONGI for 6 good years ,

as soon as your back was turned, she started banging another guy.

I have learnt to not sacrifice myself in romantic relationships. Most partners are super selfish.

Who said she wasn't even cheating while she was around?

my main man wey sabi road

oglalasioux:


She is free to move on. But if she wants to be free in her second marriage she should relinquish all privileges accorded her by her late husband.

Jacqueline Kennedy, JF Kennedy's widow, lost all privileges she enjoyed from marrying her husband when she remarried including a life time Secret Service cover.

I believe if she does that no one will raise an eyebrow. Bringing a stranger to enjoy the late man's wealth might be the reason for the antagonism.

Relinquish it to his brother or mother bah. You are not even considering if they have a child involved.Kennedy a political family did it so that must be law. life isn't that hard

mrvitalis:

3 years minimum

Who came up with this?

Ryan03:
Now reverse the roles, would you have typed same thing if it was the woman that died?

Either in a case of a husband or wife, it is hard to easily move on on the death of any.

I Lost just a friend and took me about more than a year before I began to leave his memory behind, I kept seeing him in my dreams with the move I had for him.

Let alone partners that had been living, eating, bathing, praying, gisting, gossiping, and doing alot of things together.

Morally she should have waited a little more not because of what people say tho but to respect the man if she truly loved him.

Conversely, there's no Law that stops her from remarrying even the second day of the death. But moral supercedes any other Law... By the way who got her pregnant?

The truth is this; she and the man that impregnated her have being having an affair even bfre the death of her husband, no wonder it was dat smooth to move on so quickly.

if they had baby together she should have aleast wait longer than that but if there is no baby you can easily change evironment and move on no one control your life..people can easily talk and critizise even her ...you will be shock to hear her opinion if it happened to someone else

Oyindidi:
Marriage is till death do us part. If a partner is gone the other partner is free to re-marry. It all depends on the individual that is involved.

Men even sleep with their girlfriends on the day their wives pass on.... I went to a burial in Okrika some years ago and I couldn't stop crying as the husband was with his girlfriends, he doesn't look like a widower and he didn't allow her children to mourn. I was heartbroken but no one condemned his act. If it were to be a woman the earth will stand still.

Op please stand by this woman, she is going through a lot right now

But you are not heartbroken in this case cos she your fellow hoe woman abi?

Ryan03:
Let Her Go

I just want to write this short post hoping it will change someone's mentality base on the issue i'm about to discuss.

A lady at my place of work lost her husband almost 1yr 6months ago, now, she is about 3months pregnant and wants to get married but the backlash she is receiving eh? Her late husband's people have been frustrating her saying it is too early to get married (i thought marriage is till death do us part?), why are they trying to control her life simply because she was once married to their brother?

I want to believe the family members of this man have moved on with their lives since the death of their son, why then do you want to lock her up in mourning? The surprising part of it is that even women at the office are against her,

---

some who have also lost their husbands are citing instances of how they watied 7years before re-marrying and so on.

---

I felt bad for her, all she do now is to cry, and mind her business. This is so wrong, free that young lady, she didnt do wrong in marrying your kinsman.

Na army .... Everyone is just losing someone

Logobenz1:
Look there is an undertone to everything bro.
Do you know what love is?if you love a person,moving on won't be that easy!
That's why the dead man's family is protesting because it kind of tells them the woman did not love their brother enough.
I remember 2008 when the first woman I ever loved left for France for studies.God I cried,did not date any other person till 2014 or so...
Love is not that easy to move on from.

Are you married?

If yes, you should know that it's not easy to suddenly find oneself alone after living with a soulmate for years.

I've been married for more than a decade. Marriage is more than romantic love.......it's a lot more. If one has tasted the goodness of a happy marriage, loneliness becomes hard to bear. Remember, it's been a year and a half. That's a long time.

On the converse side, if the marriage was bad, she would be in a hurry to move on.

The main thing I would caution is that she shouldn't rush into something she may regret.

lexy2014:


Who came up with this?

Never mind

Sometimes I wonder who gives us the right to try and control people's lives. There is no barometer to measure love neither is there a rule on how long one is to grief before moving on. Each person is wired differently. We are not to judge. In the above case, the lady could have gotten pregnant for the man not intentionally. The man could have been there for her, one thing leads to another and then belle. Body no be wood. I remember when my late wife died. Her siblings were even the one encouraging me to move on and get someone. Let's not always complicate people's lives.

Davash222:

Let the woman die first, then you can bring this question.

We now see why most husbands don’t Will their properties to their wives. The wife will now come and bring a wretched, broke man to come and be enjoying the man’s wealth while his family got nothing.

Men, wise up. These hoes ain’t loyal!!

Spots on

Davash222:

Let the woman die first, then you can bring this question.

Ryan03:
People grief differently. Because mrs A griefed for 10years doesn't mean mrs B must grief for same number of years. Why exactly do we monitor how long people grief? Are we happy seeing them in that state? I thought relatives and friends are to comfort them and help them move on?

So giving her anotjer dick is the way out oga Oga the dead deserves some respect too

Life goes on! The guy is dead and nothing can change that.

Ryan03:
Let Her Go

I just want to write this short post hoping it will change someone's mentality base on the issue i'm about to discuss.

A lady at my place of work lost her husband almost 1yr 6months ago, now, she is about 3months pregnant and wants to get married but the backlash she is receiving eh? Her late husband's people have been frustrating her saying it is too early to get married (i thought marriage is till death do us part?), why are they trying to control her life simply because she was once married to their brother?

I want to believe the family members of this man have moved on with their lives since the death of their son, why then do you want to lock her up in mourning? The surprising part of it is that even women at the office are against her, some who have also lost their husbands are citing instances of how they watied 7years before re-marrying and so on.

I felt bad for her, all she do now is to cry, and mind her business. This is so wrong, free that young lady, she didnt do wrong in marrying your kinsman.

first the idiot behind this monika is a useless female LovePeddler. secondly, the LovePeddler you are trying to defend started fucking guys barely few months after her husbands death. that is if she was not fucking the guy in question while her husband was alive. cos before a woman decides to marry , she must have known him for a while. you are talking about getting pregnant here . this means the bitch ass LovePeddler has been fucking around even while her husband was alive.
even NORMAL BREAK ups takes time for both partners to heal and find love again. that is if they really loved themselves. bitch if i was a member of that family, i will let you give birth then slowly sniff out your life and make it look like an accident