oldbende:

I thank all of you for your contributions, after reading your posts I have changed my mind to remain in the states, this forum have help me resolve one of of the most controversial issue in my life, moreover I'm a guy not a girl .

Once again I appreciate your contributions.

What you are not coming home? Dont you miss that welcome to Nigeria sign that is in Murtala airport right away to remind you that TIA (This is Africa).

oldbende:

I thank all of you for your contributions, after reading your posts I have changed my mind to remain in the states, this forum have help me resolve one of of the most controversial issue in my life, moreover I'm a guy not a girl .

Once again I appreciate your contributions.

you know what you are doing is illegal!

you are breaking laws

whether you like it or not,  sooner or later, you will have to go back, voluntarily or by force.

If your present economic situation doesnt make you go back to Nigeria voluntarily, it is a matter of time before you get caught by immigration, and when they do, you'd be forced to go back home, most likely, with some prescription meds to soothe your sore anus.

oldbende:

I thank all of you for your contributions, after reading your posts I have changed my mind to remain in the states, this forum have help me resolve one of of the most controversial issue in my life, moreover I'm a guy not a girl .

Once again I appreciate your contributions.

Imo, if you can go to nursing school so you can get legalized, do it. I know it might sound unpleasant, but the salary is pretty good, and you'll never be looking for work. That would be the best way to invest your $13k saved up, imo.

Once you get legal, then you can come and go as your please.

@fstranger: Rice with fork. Cereal with spoon. Pounded yam with fork.


@Ileke-IdI: Sad, isn't it? Perhaps I should blame government marginalization for my problems, like OnlyTruth

oldbende:

I thank all of you for your contributions, after reading your posts I have changed my mind to remain in the states, this forum have help me resolve one of of the most controversial issue in my life, moreover I'm a guy not a girl .

Once again I appreciate your contributions.

OldBende,

I'm sorry I thought you were a girl.  Not sure if it was something I picked up from your other posts.

So, you've decided to stay?  Are you staying in the same city?  Do you live alone or with family or friends?  You said you called a lot of people when your're stressed or depressed, how're you planning on fixing that - coping when next you feel down? 

I guess, for someone who 2 days ago, sounded so fed up to the point where he's already purchased his plane ticket, I wonder what's changed. 

All in all I am glad you made a decision with which you're confortable.  Just about everyone who posted thinks Naija is too messed up to relocate to right now.  So you can feel good about your decision. Take care! 

And you can always resurrect this thread to update us.

You folks are so selfish. If a punter wants to return to the "Happiest nation on Earth", none of you have any right to deny him that right. He wants to be happy, for phucks sake, so stop trying to Bogart the scene by keeping him out. Dang !

fstranger1:

you know what you are doing is illegal!

you are breaking laws

whether you like it or not,  sooner or later, you will have to go back, voluntarily or by force.

If your present economic situation doesnt make you go back to Nigeria voluntarily, it is a matter of time before you get caught by immigration, and when they do, you'd be forced to go back home, most likely, with some prescription meds to soothe your sore anus.

U wish but sorry wishes aint horses B.M.F ( Big Mother Fuccker). Instead of u to shut ur smelly mouth u still went ahead and say shiit.
Holier than thou

oyewolejos:

U [b]wish but sorry wishes aint horses [/b]B.M.F ( Big Mother Fuccker). Instead of u to shut your smelly mouth u still went ahead and say shiit.
Holier than thou

Hahahahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Somebody has wasted some years of his life in an unhappy environment and has only 13k dollars to show for it and you want him to keep enduring the punishment just because he will be smelling white sshit instead of black, you dont wish this guy well!
@ OP, hang on in there, by the time your mates have 5 kids each and you only have 20k saved + the stress, you will realize what you just walked into.

spyder880:

Somebody has wasted some years of his life in an unhappy environment and has only 13k dollars to show for it and you want him to keep enduring the punishment just because he will be smelling white sshit instead of black, you dont wish this guy well!
@ OP, hang on in there, by the time your mates have 5 kids each and you only have 20k saved + the stress, you will realize what you just walked into.

you do realize that this is a curse right ? 5 kids is torture

oyewolejos:

U wish but sorry wishes aint horses B.M.F ( Big Mother Fuccker). Instead of u to shut your smelly mouth u still went ahead and say shiit.
Holier than thou

how do you know his mouth is smelly ? do you go around shoving your grill in folks mouth ? 

buzugee:

you do realize that this is a curse right ?

Naa, that was not my intention, I only wanted to prod him by painting a bad scenario for him.

spyder880:

Naa, that was not my intention, I only wanted to prod him by painting a bad scenario for him.

lol am just messing with ya dude. but yeah strong point you made though

buzugee:

lol am just messing with ya dude. but yeah strong point you made though

I know, you'r cool man.

well life is not always about the physical. life is also about the mental. both are entities which have to be fulfilled in your life for you to be a happy human being. if you are under the age of 24, chances are that you can fulfill the physical anywhere in the world you find yourself. chances are that you will be a party animal, into drinking alcohol, smoking ciggys, weed, clubbing, chasing skirts left right and centre, eating out all the time, carefree, living it up. your pursuit of the 'physical' at that age will mask the need to fulfill the 'mental'. after the age of 24 when you no longer do all those things (keep in mind this is 90 percent of the fun in the western world ) then you are left with a huge void to fill. this void must now be filled with 'mental stimulation'. most people are mentally stimulated when they are around like minded folk. people that look like you, think like you, eat like you, dress like you, react like you etc etc. so that after the age of 24 you are basically stuck in a place where your physical and mental needs will never be met unless you do radical things like plunge headlong into an activity that will bring you in contact with like minded people. which is why a lot of nigerians over a certain age are heavily born again in england and america. this fulfills a physical and a mental need to be connected and happy.

so what about those under 24 who don't do those "physical" things you listed and are doing more of the "mental" things? what will their life be like at 24+? similar situation or better?

eku_bear:

100% correct, I eat pounded yam with a fork. . .I just don't like getting messy when I'm eating. And getting stew all over the cup, etc. Just makes me enjoy my food less if I'm eating with anything other than a fork. I'm a very finicky eater. I hate eating rice with spoons, for example.

serious ajebutter  
i'm stalking you btw. hope you realize that.

oyewolejos:

U wish but sorry wishes aint horses B.M.F ( Big Mother Fuccker). Instead of u to shut your smelly mouth u still went ahead and say shiit.
Holier than thou

Sorry, have we met?


Why the hate?


Did someone collect your lunch money?

spyder880:

Somebody has wasted some years of his life in an unhappy environment and has only 13k dollars to show for it and you want him to keep enduring the punishment just because he will be smelling white sshit instead of black, you dont wish this guy well!
@ OP, hang on in there, by the time your mates have 5 kids each and you only have 20k saved + the stress, you will realize what you just walked into.

Where were you when I went solo, against the grain, to advice he follow his instinct ?  Dude was ready to buy his plane ticket for Pete's sake.  The very definition of "intent."
Just wanted to add: Also, $13k is not nothing.  Ask any American how much they have in savings - regardless of any high-faluting "income-level." Most people are living on credit.  I'm very proud our Poster saved that much money!  He must be very adept at avoiding western union though.

spyder880:

The holiday wont be cheap, the flight tickets and living expenses will kill him, couple that with our people's hunger for dollars from anyone who returns, else they label you a failure. Plus he will be out of work for six months?

spyder880:

For those asking him to take a vacation to naija, didnt he stay here before, what has changed, watch my siggy.

Dubious? Ambivalent? Devil's advocate??   

@Poster, I am happy you decided to stay,  but instead of trying to do it all on your own or depending on the same people who have not been able to help you to date, may I suggest you broaden your horizon, get new people, get out to other places where there are people who have been through whatever it is you are dealing with and have come out stronger.

There are Nigerians here who are actually making the right decisions, and right choices and enjoying every bit of it here. You do not have to settle for a low=level life when you can as well live a better life and more fulfilling life here.

If you need help, I suggest you pick the brain of those who have actually succeeded rather than picking that of those who are themselves unable to step out of the INSECURITY box of theirs. I believe as soon as one steps in this country, one ought to avoid the INSECURE/THE-SYSTEM-IS-UNFAIR, RACIST-ARE-AFTER-ME Nigerians and instead find the company of Nigerians/any other group of people who have, not only, excelled in their lives(even private lives) but are also willing to help others(hard to find those but they are out there).

Abandonment or loss of permanent residence status

Under certain conditions, permanent residence status can be lost involuntarily. This includes committing a criminal act that makes a person removable from the United States. A person might also be found to have abandoned their status if he or she moves to another country to live there permanently, [b]stays outside the USA for more than 365 days (without getting a re-entry permit before leaving),[/b]or does not file an income tax return. Permanent resident status can also be lost if it is found that the application or grounds for obtaining permanent residence was fraudulent. The failure to renew the permanent resident card does not result in the loss of status, except in the case of conditional permanent residents as noted above.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Permanent_residence_%28United_States%29

Eku Bear, I got this from Wiki. I am just concerned. About finalizing a big job with UNEP that will take me to East Africa. So wanted to be sure I can return afterwards.lol. So at least I get to show face every once a year or fill the re-entry form before leaving.

omongbatim:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Permanent_residence_%28United_States%29

Eku Bear, I got this from Wiki. I am just concerned. About finalizing a big job with UNEP that will take me to East Africa. So wanted to be sure I can return afterwards.lol. So at least I get to show face every once a year or fill the re-entry form before leaving.

I hope they deny you re-entry permit!

You shouldnt be living with us citizens!

Once again I thank your all for your contributions, I have lived in North Carolina since November 2007 and I think the best way to reduce the stress is to move to another city within the state.

Thank you all.

fstranger1:


I hope they deny you re-entry permit!

You shouldnt be living with us citizens!

Not really interested in US citizenship. I get all I need with the GC and with my skills, could do more for myself anywhere in the world.

so mekusxyz is omongbati as I suspected  

Emeka nwa pawpaw men

The environmentalist. While your mates are doing particle physics research  

omongbatim:

Not really interested in US citizenship. I get all I need with the GC and with my skills, could do more for myself anywhere in the world.

Kidnapping technologist? Hi-Tech okijist?

What do you do exactly?

oldbende:

Once again I thank your all for your contributions, I have lived in North Carolina since November 2007 and I think the best way to reduce the stress is to move to another city within the state.

Thank you all.

Or another state entirely. There is no tax on people moving from one state to another, And you can even move as far as California for your peace of mind ooo!!!

Kobojunkie:

Or another state entirely. There is no tax on people moving from one state to another, And you can even move as far as California for your peace of mind ooo!!!

You ask an illegal immigrant to move to a bankrupt state where jobs are being slashed on a daily basis.

I hail thee Madam Kobo!

fstranger1:

Kidnapping technologist? Hi-Tech okijist?

What do you do exactly?

apparently he is a researcher. waste of a brain. His mum should have closed her legs during the night of his conception  

oldbende:

Once again I thank your all for your contributions, I have lived in North Carolina since November 2007 and I think the best way to reduce the stress is to move to another city within the state.

Thank you all.

You're not alone.  A lot of immigrants are in the same situation.  Not just Mexicans or Nigerians.  Lots of Russians, Ukrainians, people from all over the world.  I think Somalis are the only ones that I haven't met with that problem. 

If you live in North Carolina and are able to be employed, kudos to you.  I know they adopted e-Verify and it is statewide, not just for government employees - private businesses have to use it too.  I know that if you're already employed, your employers cannot try to use it on you.  It's for new hires only.  Any employer that uses it are obliged to display a sign in the interview room or personnel office advising applicants that they use e-Verify.  In that case, just excuse yourself - say something like this place sucks and I've changed my mind.  If you apply for a job and somehow get notified either before you start or within days of starting, don't be intimidated into signing anything.  Do not sign anything.  You're not obliged to explain anything.  As far as you know, someone made a mistake somewhere.  Challenge them on why you were not notified they use e-Verify.  If you must, tell them you have an immigration attorney that is handling an ongoing matter, and you just want your paycheck now cos you don't know how long this crap will take to resolve.  Don't sign anything! Finish your day's work and don't go back.  They still have to pay your though, but be smart about it. Don't contact SSA and don't send anything back.  Don't panic and abandon your home thinking INS will come.  Talk to other people you trust.  I'm not aware of anyone that has been hunted down simply because of e-Verify exposure.  Congress and INS/Homeland Security have not decided how to handle at this time. If anyone has info to the contrary, they can post it, please. (Also, I do not recall if there is a maximum number of employees before a company is eligible for e-Verify.)

This is all assuming that you use a SS # of course - either yours that is not eligible for work, or someone else, or a madeup #.

If you want to move to another part of NC, keep it in mind.  Because you may be looking for a new job.

Of course, you can always do your own business, or work for someone who will not require certain things; work as an independent contract if you're able.  Even though the IRS and each state's department of labor are coming down hard on employers for that too.

If you choose to relocate to another state, definitely pick a state where they have not adopted it and there is no ongoing talk of the state legislators trying to adopt it. ok?

Of course, that is not the only consideration; some states are adopting restrictive laws like those preventing some immigrants from getting drivers license; empowering police to check your status in some cases; someone else mentioned job availablity.  I know where I am, the unemployment rate just went up, though we have yet to impose e-Verify on all employers.  Any company doing government contract work must use it, even, for example attorneys representing utility companies thst are partially funded by goverment funds.

I don't want to get too technical.  If this doesn't apply to you, it may apply to someone else out there.

Get more information direct.  This is abbreviated. If you have any immigration problems, contact an attorney listed with AILA - American Immigration Lawyers Association.

buzugee:

lmao you know my intention was not to be misogynistic. i am speaking from experience. i have family members who are female in exactly the same predicament. middle aged, no kids, living alone, in america, and not too happy but dont want to go to nigeria for fear of the unknown. (extended not nuclear family)

Badagry, go here:

What an informative post, @isale_gan!

Kobojunkie:

Or another state entirely. There is no tax on people moving from one state to another, And you can even move as far as California for your peace of mind ooo!!!

stop advising the guy wrongly. in california they pro-actively seek out illegals. it is not a refuge state.

Did the man tell you that he is an illegal immigrant? First you wrongly assumed he was a female, and now you concluded that he is an illegal immigrant and I must do same as you have?