Alright

doxijaw:


The big picture matters!

We on the same side though!

Odoogu:
African culture is deeply laced with moral values, not that immorality doesn't exist, but the upbringing of an African child always harps on that at the very least. being primitive is just lack of exposure and the needs of not wanting to.
Even the British or American have morals with their upbringing, but the liberality could be a bane if not properly handled especially if you live within an African country.

with all due respect
shut the Bleep up

[s]

bjdon:

Just because you have access to the internet, does not mean you are obliged to post and display your ignorance to the whole world.

Fact Number 1: The overwhelming majority of people in the US and Europe are not homosexual.
Fact Number2: There are loads of homosexuals in Nigeria, how come the so called 'African Way' has not prevented it?
Fact Number3: Were all the current rulers in Nigeria not brought up in the so called 'African Way' how has it benefit us?

We produce nothing of any economic substance in Africa. Our raw materials are brought by other nations for a pittance, converted into value added products and resold to us at massive mark ups. How come our 'African way' education has not been able to equip us with the tools to be active economic players on the global stage?

We have scant regard for the rule of law. Life has virtually no value across the land, how has our 'African Way' education helped to resolve/prevent any of these negative realities?


A little less arrogance/Ignorance will go a long way.

[/s] This lengthy post full bias thinking , which are in no way factual.

Whether you choose to accept it or not, here are the facts of the matter

1. The act of homosexuality in Nigeria is a punishable offense by law. Therefore, the number of homosexuals here are fewer in number when compared to western societies where homosexuality is upheld by law, hence multiplying the number homosexuals in those societies.


2. In every society , there are criminals and no society is free from criminals. And this same analogy can be applied to homosexuals in every society So for you to say the "African way " has not prevented homosexuals from multiplying , is like saying the police have not completely stop crime in society. Which is practically impossible.

3. Corruption is the cause of Nigeria's problem, not the "African way.

nauttyn:

with all due respect
shut the Bleep up

With all due respect, you came too late.
I already aired my opinion.

Wittyduchess:
I am only pointing out the fact that the morality you pride yourselves in is just a facade. There is nothing moral about a corrupt population.

It's not a facade and every culture all over the world has it in theirs.

Eviana:


I would be lying if I said that NO ONE has ever spoken towards me in a vulgar manner...
What I said was never the amount of angry and un-provoked name-calling abuse had I ever experienced till I came to Nairaland.
Vulgarity is rampant in the U.S....along with many other vices.
My heart sinks for the children of this century.
I would NEVER want a child of mine to ever be exposed...which is why it would be my responsibility as a parent to do as best as possible to shield them and provide alternatives to what the culture is offering.

See beating up or burning kids physically is not the answer either.
Nigeria seems to also have an equal amount of vulgarity and perverse language.
Are you shielding your kids from this site?
Tons of vulgarity, nudity, abusive language here...

...and you think the US government will allow you raise your child in the standards you desire abi? Hahahaha...please do not deceive yourself. The US government and its society dictate the standard to you. And if you run contrary to those standards, your child will be taken away from you and given to a foster home. So summary, you cannot raise your child according to your own standards over there. But over here, you can do that.


Peace

Rubbish everywhere.

Jashub:
Homosexuality is one. Vulgar language is another. And from you conversation, I can tell you are quite a vulgar chap.

Yes, i am. Let me guess.... you are a saint.

bezimo:
I live in the West and I bet you don't want to raise your kids in western ways that encourage children to do what they want without discipline or consequence..that's why many of them grow up to be disaster nuisance to the society. Instilling African values of respect, value, modesty and discipline is a big challenge if you as an African man live in the West with your kids..theses factor are against you.
1. You can't discipline your child the African way to address recalcitrant behaviour..
2. The CfS or government regulatory body for child and family support would always never be on your slide if matters escalate relating to child discipline..
3. Those kids go to school and are faced with serious peer pressure to misalign..
4. If your wife don't share the same African culture values with you, you will have a hard time getting the kids to straighten up.

The western ways of raising kids is not the best way..that's why you see most of those kids are nothing but morally disasters. In my city last week 2 white teenage girls(13,15) attacked a woman when she alighted from a bus and robbed her and assaulted her badly..offcourse the police got involved..that's just one case among many we hear. Those 2 girls are an example of products of the terrible parenting model run by the West.
If the boys are not robbing liquor store, car jacking and fleeing, they are robbing people, attacking people, joing gangs or been such an idiot lowlifer.

I think you miss the point. As we speak, many Nigerian youths are robbing on highways, traffic, homes, store etc. The others are neck deep in yahoo scheming hard earners, our ladies are into prostitution, others into rituals. Many rapes and killings. Most of the bokoharam members, bandits and herdsmen are youths too (they are Nigerians... dont forget that). The average Nigerian you engage in business wants to defraud you. Look at the political class.... are they not raised with the African values?

Point is don't single out a single act in the west to compare to the terrible youth future in Nigeria.

I don't think folks understand how badly the culture in Nigeria has deteriorated. The chance that an average Nigerian youth will not resort to Yahoo and prostitution is less than 30%

So which Nigerian culture is even better than the west in the true sense?

Yankee101:


Yes, because the so called celebrity is copying the so called 'abroad' lifestyle

Whose fault? There are millions of Nigerians who live abroad but dont feel the need to copy that lifestyle. If people raised their children right in Niggeria they wont feel the need to copy the rubbish they see on MTV.

It's very very wrong

https://www.ozy.com/around-the-world/why-sub-saharan-african-immigrants-to-american-are-the-most-educated/349123/

In fact, according to data collated by the Migration Policy Institute from the Census Bureau and American Community Surveys:

40 PERCENT OF IMMIGRANTS TO THE U.S. FROM SUB-SAHARAN AFRICA HOLD AT LEAST A BACHELOR’S DEGREE

That’s compared to 31 percent for the country’s overall foreign-born population and 32 percent for those born in the U.S. Nigerians and South Africans are the most highly educated, with 61 percent and 58 percent, respectively, holding at least an undergraduate degree.

She says that Ghanaians, for instance, have a sense of community that often insulates them from distractions, and keeps them busy in churches and classrooms.

Jashub:
...and you think the US government will allow you raise your child in the standards you desire abi? Hahahaha...please do not deceive yourself. The US government and its society dictate the standard to you. And if you run contrary to those standards, your child will be taken away from you and given to a foster home. So summary, you cannot raise your child according to your own standards over there. But over here, you can do that.


Peace

You are wrong. A lot of well trained and well behaved kids of Nigerian descent dot the landscape of USA.

Unfortunately despite the supposed moral superiority you uphold for Nigeria, the average Nigerian is extremely corrupt and ready to defraud in one breath.

Jashub:
...and you think the US government will allow you raise your child in the standards you desire abi? Hahahaha...please do not deceive yourself.The US government and its society dictate the standard to you. And if you run contrary to those standards, your child will be taken away from you and given to a foster home. So summary, you cannot raise your child according to your own standards over there. But over here, you can do that.




Peace

That would depend on the "standards".
What "standards" would they impose on me teaching my kid and would take my kid away if I refused to abide? Examples please?
I don't have any kids, but this is hypothetically speaking.

Schools that are "non-government" funded do not necessarily have to abide by governmental standards.
There's also this alternative called "home-schooling" which a percentage of Americans exclusively do.

What does the Nigerian government dictate in terms of standards for raising children?

I'm curious to know..surely there are good schools there, but I'd like to know what the special ingredient is.

There seem to be lots of orphanages in Nigeria---due to "cultural" stigmas, superstition etc.
Why so many "mother-less" and "father-less" children....I mean kids whose parents ARE alive yet disowned them?
I would be afraid to be a child accused of being a "warlock" or "wizard" and either killed or abandoned forever?

Curious to know....have you ever lived in the U.S.? Have you ever had personal experience with the educational system?

Jashub:
[s][/s] This lengthy post full bias thinking , which are in no way factual.

Whether you choose to accept it or not, here are the facts of the matter


1. The act of homosexuality in Nigeria is a punishable offense by law. Therefore, the number of homosexuals here are fewer in number when compared to western societies where homosexuality is upheld by law, hence multiplying the number homosexuals in those societies.


2. In every society , there are criminals and no society is free from criminals. And this same analogy can be applied to homosexuals in every society So for you to say the "African way " has not prevented homosexuals from multiplying , is like saying the police have not completely stop crime in society. Which is practically impossible.

3. Corruption is the cause of Nigeria's problem, not the "African way.

Those are not facts sir.
"Punishable" yet has that stopped the reality of practicinv homosexuals there?
I'll answer--Not in the least bit.
What you have is more homosexuals hiding and living deceptive lifestyles in Nigeria and trying to find a way to flee...
You would never be able to get an accurate percentage of homosexuals there because they would all deny it due to the law.
That is the only difference.

What is the "African way"?
Cause, with all due respect, I am not impressed.

Wittyduchess:
Moral values?

The same country that ranks high on the corruption table, scam, fraud, ritual killing, terrorism, terrible justice system,hypocrisy etc.

Which morality are you talking about? Oh because you know how to greet in the morning and evening?

Who told you all of that doesn't exist in the west

Don't throw away your culture for theirs
They won't do the same for you

[s]

ratiken:


You are wrong. A lot of well trained and well behaved kids of Nigerian descent dot the landscape of USA.

Unfortunately despite the supposed moral superiority you uphold for Nigeria, the average Nigerian is extremely corrupt and ready to defraud in one breath.

[/s] This is generalizing. Kindly prove it with facts and figures.

Eviana:


Those are not facts sir.
"Punishable" yet has that stopped the reality of practicinv homosexuals there?
I'll answer--Not in the least bit.
What you have is more homosexuals hiding and living deceptive lifestyles in Nigeria and trying to find a way to flee...
You would never be able to get an accurate percentage of homosexuals there because they would all deny it due to the law.
That is the only difference.

What is the "African way"?
Cause, with all due respect, I am not impressed.

Before we go into the "African way, " I would like to ask you a question : Which society has the highest number of recorded homosexuals: the African society or the western society?

Jashub:
[s][/s] This is generalizing. Kindly prove it with facts and figures.

Which facts do you need?, that the Nigerians trained with the supposed African culture are the ones being jailed all over the world for drugs and fraud? That the average Nigerian youth lady is into prostitution including your actresses? That the 'successful youths' in Nigeria are yahoo boys? That the average Nigerian defraud you at the slightest opportunity despite the moral grandstanding?

What proof do you need?.. just look around you and proof is underneath your nose.

Everything Nigeria represents today in the global space is the exact opposite of moral uprightness. If you were fair, you will make sure your kid does not turn out as the AVERAGE Nigerian youth trained in Nigeria and resident in Nigeria

[s]

ratiken:


Which facts do you need?, that the Nigerians trained with the supposed African culture are the ones being jailed all over the world for drugs and fraud? That the average Nigerian youth lady is into prostitution including your actresses? That the 'successful youths' in Nigeria are yahoo boys? That the average Nigerian defraud you at the slightest opportunity despite the moral grandstanding?

What proof do you need?.. just look around you and proof is underneath your nose.

Everything Nigeria represents today in the global space is the exact opposite of moral uprightness. If you were fair, you will make sure your kid does not turn out as the AVERAGE Nigerian youth trained in Nigeria and resident in Nigeria

[/s] This is another baseless generalization that does not have a single ounce of fact in it.

NotGej:
The earlier we realize that that traditional African way of training kids impede development the better for us.

Part of such practice includes torture of young children in the disguise of discipline as have been recorded.

Our ways are outdated and retrogressive in nature. That is, it imbibes that culture of unduly worshipping adults. It entrenches a system of geriatric approach like we have in Nigeria; where undeserving old people are placed on a pedestal. (Eg OBJ, PMB, Tinubu etc). Some of these people are unworthy of positions and respect they get judging by the actions.

So also, our African approach hampers / kills creativity of the African child. The child is conditioned to accept and not question whatsoever thrown at them. In essence, it places a ceiling to what a ‘child’ should attain or achieve. This is why we have a situation where any young person that is seen as doing well and/or with a different view, lifestyle, orientation is hounded and termed a Yahoo boy.

Finalement, the African way of raising kids has done more harm than good in our society today. There is no benefit other than raising kids who are docile, easily manipulated by adult/ parents, etc.

Anybody that supports our very outdated approach suppports crimes against humanity and should be held to account. All humans have equal rights; be it/she/him/they/ them/he/her young or old.

This the sort of shallow stereotyping that I cautioned the OP about...

First, there’s child abuse EVERYWHERE unfortunately...
If you are blissfully unaware of child abuse in the West, you should get out more.

Meanwhile, I guess it depends on one’s family or surroundings...
But I never had issues asking questions of elders, so long as it is done RESPECTFULLY!

While I suppose it’s a matter of personal opinion...
I would never consider insulting and harassing elders as being “creative”.

Finally, not sure where you get the idea of the “docile” African...
Nigerians are among the LOUDEST and most self-confident (for better and worse) people on earth.
>

Eviana:


That would depend on the "standards".
What "standards" would they impose on me teaching my kid and would take my kid away if I refused to abide? Examples please?
I don't have any kids, but this is hypothetically speaking.

Schools that are "non-government" funded do not necessarily have to abide by governmental standards.
There's also this alternative called "home-schooling" which a percentage of Americans exclusively do.

What does the Nigerian government dictate in terms of standards for raising children?

I'm curious to know..surely there are good schools there, but I'd like to know what the special ingredient is.

There seem to be lots of orphanages in Nigeria---due to "cultural" stigmas, superstition etc.
Why so many "mother-less" and "father-less" children....I mean kids whose parents ARE alive yet disowned them?
I would be afraid to be a child accused of being a "warlock" or "wizard" and either killed or abandoned forever?

Curious to know....have you ever lived in the U.S.? Have you ever had personal experience with the educational system?

The guy you are responding to is the typical example of the hypocrisy bedevilling Nigeria.

Even when every thing around you points to the moral decadence that has made a mess of the Nigeria we once knew..... they will still play ostrich while pointing to the evils of the west.

Gone are the days when society train kids. The responsibility of training your kid stays within the family unit. Any kid trained by the Nigerian society today will turn out badly cos the society is pure evil.

WiszyFraud:
It is totally wrong, because the British/American will NEVER raise their own the African way. . That is inferiority complex!!!






Use Your brain

you nailed it... he's the primitive one not others. I ve always said this, it's always Africans that will like to dump his way for a foreign way. Ask the OP about Indians, Chinese and other Asians, they make sure their kids speaks their language and do things their way, sure they will also do things the western way but you will always see them holding their belief but Nigerians once they cross bother, they tell you their root is evil.
I bet you, Chinese hardly date outside their race, same with Indians but Nigerians want to do anywhere. to them Pakistanis are oyinbo too.... na OP get the primitive mentality. raise your kids so they can call their mother b!tch any little opportunity

Jashub:
[s][/s] This is another baseless generalization that does not have a single ounce of fact in it.

You've got nothing to say. Just run along.

the African society is a yeyerious and backwards society, pls don't raise ur child in it if you have the opportunity to raise him in another continent.

ratiken:


You've got nothing to say. Just run along.

Why should I say anything when you are busy generalizing things without traceable evidence? I challenged you to provide facts and figure, but out of the richness of your biased mind, you start conjuring stories that do not have an ounce of truth to it.

Jashub:
Before we go into the "African way, " I would like to ask you a question : Which society has the highest number of recorded homosexuals: the African society or the western society?

Not a fair question. I cannot answer it because I do not know.
As I stated earlier, there can never be an accurate percentage reported in Nigeria due to non-admittance by the person...because of the penalty of the law.

ratiken:


I think you miss the point. As we speak, many Nigerian youths are robbing on highways, traffic, homes, store etc. The others are neck deep in yahoo scheming hard earners, our ladies are into prostitution, others into rituals. Many rapes and killings. Most of the bokoharam members, bandits and herdsmen are youths too (they are Nigerians... dont forget that). The average Nigerian you engage in business wants to defraud you. Look at the political class.... are they not raised with the African values?

Point is don't single out a single act in the west to compare to the terrible youth future in Nigeria.


I don't think folks understand how badly the culture in Nigeria has deteriorated. The chance that an average Nigerian youth will not resort to Yahoo and prostitution is less than 30%


So which Nigerian culture is even better than the west in the true sense?

Perfectly stated.....the truth hurts and is uncomfortable sometimes.

The same person would be glad when he or she hears about, okonjo eweala, chimamanda, wale Soyinka, dangote, even otedola and co were they raised the British and American way before they became successful?

Use your head this is inferiority complex.

That is how one mumu man was threatening himself cos I said spare the rod and spoil the child...

ratiken:


The guy you are responding to is the typical example of the hypocrisy bedevilling Nigeria.

Even when every thing around you points to the moral decadence that has made a mess of the Nigeria we once knew..... they will still play ostrich while pointing to the evils of the west.

Gone are the days when society train kids. The responsibility of training your kid stays within the family unit. Any kid trained by the Nigerian society today will turn out badly cos the society is pure evil.

I appreciate you being balanced here.
I have not read any balance in the guy's posts....just bashing the U.S. and placing Nigeria on a pedestal it unfortunately does not deserve in that area....at least not anymore.
The Nigeria of today isn't the one of yesteryear. It's truly saddening. I can't tell a difference between the youth/young adults there and the ones here..
It all truly goes back to the parenting....before blaming anything else.

MisterRuk:
I'm not a parent but I'll say that there is no such thing like training your child in the "British or American or Asian way". There is good parenting and bad parenting. It's all about raising your child with good and ethical values, giving him/her good formal and informal education, being close to them emotionally, maximizing their strengths and helping them to minimize their weaknesses. But unfortunately parents always tend to display some of the biggest forms of hypocrisy I have ever seen.
African parenting isn't even the most ideal. Families are the core of societies, everyone comes from one family or the other, and family system and culture are one the oldest determinants of how the society is run. We tend to uphold "African parenting" on our head like gala and lacasera , but go out to the Nigerian society you will see a lot of bad values and ethics with people, especially amongst the poor and middle class. Again, i found out that the reason why people here are always afraid to voice out their opinions, fight for their rights, and stand against a bad system has something to do with our parenting system. Parents and schools tend to be autocratic, where order is only gotten through rigid force and beatings, thus we are mostly taught "fear" and never "respect". Over the years the government, the military, the police and different people in power have always utilized that " subconscious fear" in Nigerians to get away with oppressing people and stay in power.
Many of we millenials and gen-Z have embraced counterculture because we've seen that upon all the "african way", it doesn't reflect in the society, there is still so much corruption and poverty.

As society is advancing, cultures are spreading globally and the media is becoming more influential, the coming generation will be more intelligent, more independent, and more complicated than the last.We have to advance our cultures and change our strategies of raising children, because if they cannot come to trust you, the media will be their parent.

Nope! Just as we are no more intelligent than our parents, the coming generation will not be any more intelligent than us...

Intelligence and knowledge are related but distinct different things, so younger generations are not more intelligent just knowledgeable about different/new things that the previous generation didn’t necessarily had to bother about. Of course, technology will enable us learn more, but that’s not synonymous with being more intelligent. Furthermore, technology can be a double-edged sword and sometimes have the unintended effect of making users more lazy and less inquisitorial.

Culture is NOT, and has NEVER been, static. It constantly evolves, and has always done so - at varying speeds (or lack thereof). To that extent, while I agree with you on the increasing convergence of human cultures, I do not necessarily regard it as a novel. A reason that I cautioned the OP against reliance on the comments on this thread is, apart from the obvious stereotyping on every side, I see so many comments confusing largely ephemeral characteristics as culture itself, when in fact culture is what lies at the core of human mores and value systems. In that respect, having had the happenstance of mixed parentage, being born abroad and living in 7 different countries on 4 seemingly-divergent continents, there are infinitely more core SIMILARITIES than differences across the human face, when we are not being distracted by “tribal” trappings.
>

9jaRealist:


Nope! Just as we are no more intelligent than our parents, the coming generation will not be any more intelligent than us...

Intelligence and knowledge are related but distinct different things, so younger generations are not more intelligent just knowledgeable about different/new things that the previous generation didn’t necessarily had to bother about. Of course, technology will enable us learn more, but that’s not synonymous with being more intelligent. Furthermore, technology can be a double-edged sword and sometimes have the unintended effect of making users more lazy and less inquisitorial.

Culture is NOT, and has NEVER been, static. It constantly evolves, and has always done so - at varying speeds (or lack thereof). To that extent, while I agree with you on the increasing convergence of human cultures, I do not necessarily regard it as a novel. A reason that I cautioned the OP against reliance on the comments on this thread is, apart from the obvious stereotyping on every side, I see so many comments confusing largely ephemeral characteristics as culture itself, when in fact culture is what lies at the core of human mores and value systems. In that respect, having had the happenstance of mixed parentage, being born abroad and living in 7 different countries on 4 seemingly-divergent continents, there are infinitely more core SIMILARITIES than differences across the human face, when we are not being distracted by “tribal” trappings.
>

I see what you are saying here.
That makes a lot of sense and I agree with your last sentence.