lisasmiles:

@blank - I did not bash you. I said the comment about your name, because evidently you have not fully read my post. I did not bash the guy. In fact I said that truly believe that they really loved each other. I gave the background of the story, so people could understand why I was asking about traditional Nigerian weddings. Now if that is the way you feel about a person you have never met I would hate to see someone you have met. You bashed me from the beginning. I know that friends do things to other friends, but I am not like that. I can not control what you put on this forum, but I ask that you please do not bash me in that way, just for asking a question. Now if I offended you in what I said in my earlier post I do apologize, because that was not my intent. Again God Bless You.

Save the "God bless You" sanctimonious phrase for another forum where it may have an impact, God has no role to play in this matter. Show me where in the Bible, God says that a friend should do everything within her power to spoil the happiness of her bosom friend?! As far as am concerned, you have absolutely no proof to back up your alleged claims, and even if the guy involved was supposedly married in Nigeria, is that supposed marriage affecting the happiness of your friend at the moment?! What matters is now, leave out the future for them both. If it works out between them, fine; if it doesn't work out, leave them both to it and focus on your own life. This is the first time in real life I have seen someone like yourself doing this to her friend, I thought this saga only happens in the movie, I was so wrong!

@claremont - What am I doing except trying to find out how a traditional wedding works? What claim? You act like I told her any of this. Like I said before whatever she decide I got her back and that is that. I did not tell her to leave him. I just told her to check out his story. That is what I meant earlier when I said I tried talking to her. This here is me having her back.

@lisasmiles, your starting to get irrirative now, you said you came here to find out about nigerian traditional marriage, I think you need to reread your original post, also in one of your post you said you will bring your friend to this site for her to see your self so you can say I told you so see what other people are talking about.

What your intention? Please just go away man, People like you makes me creep, a black guy and a white all of a sudden its way pass through green card, do you know how many Americans in the Uk getting married to British citizens so they can settle down here? Does that mean they love their other halves any less?

Should I paint all Americans I see with british women black? You really truly christian eh more like a silent devilish one.

As I said in my previous post, your jealous but you will never admit it on here, but I know and you know deep down you are. Butt out let your friend make her decision, even if your friend didnt marry this guy, can you tell me the next guy she will meet will be any better, or your gonna be a relationship cop who will be digging out background of anyone she ever met or ever say shes gonna get married to.

Really, your married for 10 yrs? really? I doubt it.

Lisa

One thing you will learn about NL, KEEP YOUR PRIVATE LIFE PERSONAL. just giving you heads up.

You pretty MUCH gotten all the answers you needed and wish you and your friend HEALING LUCK.

People are being redundant and repetitive.

For those who said that SHE mentioned ALL NIGERIANS are bad. Not one time I seen that unless yall got her post mixed up with another chatter's post.

Just because someone has DOUBT or concern about A PERSON THAT IS NIGERIAN OR AMERICAN doesn't mean that they ASSUMED ALL are the same. Stop being defensive and ACTUALLY read the poster's comments.

Gotdamn. For the record, she is SPEAKING OF ONE NIGERIAN MAN as in SINGULAR.

Mrs Chima, Gerrout man I saw alot of your post on here you need to get off your high horse. Ya hide behind your fecking screen and spit poo out.

I see the stone hit you in the neck huh?

Cold ice pack will heal the pain. 

Would you like to meet so I can tell you THE EXACT same thing I typed on this thread? Can you afford the ticket should be the FIRST question I asked.

@mrs chima,  Can I afford the ticket to the USA? are you dumb or what? ya think am some guy from nigeria you can tell that too? What so special in me travelling to america

I live very close to manchester airport, am one way ticket to you fool, beside the americans has got no sense of humour so what the point.

creamofluv:

@mrs chima,  Can I afford the ticket to the USA? are you dumb or what? ya think am some guy from nigeria you can tell that too? What so special in me travelling to america

I live very close to manchester airport, am one way ticket to you fool, beside the americans has got no sense of humour so what the point.

Who said anything about traveling to America?  Are you sure YOU ARE NOT DUMB?     It not my fault those chicks kept telling YOU ARE NOT WORTH THEIR TIME.  Taking it out on me WON'T NUMB THAT PAIN boo boo. 

I guess that pain still tingling huh. 

By the way, Nigerians aren't known for being BARREL OF LAUGHTERS either.

Now getting back to what I was saying OP. 

Remember what I said.  Keep personal life personal and OFF Nairaland.   

@mrs chima, Your boring me man, I got some backlinks to blast, if your gonna chat rubbish on here you better pick some one of your caliber, because I will nail your Bottom right to the cross.

Ya think because your in america or what not, ya can spit out "can I afford the ticket" or one mins you gonna say have I got the VISA to get there? haha. You better get your sorry Bottom some where the sun to shine.

And maybe you need to get the Bleep out of Nairaland

I will not leave Nairaland.

Now what are you going to do about it?  Not a damn thang.  Now go find someone else that is interested AFTER you get over being hurt. 

I am talking about chicks and you talking about Visa. They denied your visa huh?

I did not have anything to do with Home Office denying your visa.      Wrong chick. 

Male PMS is a mofo!

mrs chima , we shouldnt insult anyone, on this thread, everyone has spoken and its left
for lisasmiles to leave her friend alone and let her carry on with their lifes, but please it doesnt
speak well encouraging people to be painting other people what they are not,
lisasmiles on her own part has done what needs to be done as friend, but she only needs to advise
her friend, guard her, and encourage her to have a go, who knows , but i still beleive the guy has good intention

@shelylilly - Thanks, mrs chima just spitting venom on here

@claremont -  well said claremont, that says it all, if it was a black british would she go through all that hassles and all, and she called her self a christian, christian my foot. Mind your own business, you putting effort into someone else business granted shes your friend, I will advice you to channel your energy into banging your hubby day in day out atleast that will get rid of your idleness

lisasmiles:

@claremont - What am I doing except trying to find out how a traditional wedding works? What claim? You act like I told her any of this. Like I said before whatever she decide I got her back and that is that. I did not tell her to leave him. I just told her to check out his story. That is what I meant earlier when I said I tried talking to her. This here is me having her back.

OP - you sound like an intelligent woman and probably don't even need to hear this, but don't listen to those people who are attacking you on this thread, or implying that you are trying to insult all Nigerian men. You are just looking out for the best interests of your friend. Been in a similar, sticky situation before, where 2 friends and I actually found out our other friend's boyfriend had another chick he had been dating for years, and even had the nerve to buy them both the same exact Christmas gift. Confirmed with the other girl and everything and there was no doubt he was HER MAN too. Yet, what do you think happened, the friend turned on us. Some women just get effed up in the head when in love.

All you can do is help her see the light; you can bring the horse to the water but you can't make her drink. Don't get mad at her if she doesn't listen to you. It sounds like you have a better grasp of different resources that can be used to investigate the issue and weigh all options than your friend does, such as the advice you received from the attorney. Plus your friend is probably so wrapped up maybe deep down she's not ready to accept what could be the truth.

If she starts catching an attitude with you about it though, you probably need to fall back because sad to say, nothing can tear a friendship apart faster than a man. Women are too freaking complicated,

smootheb:

[color=#770077][/color]

OP - you sound like an intelligent woman and probably don't even need to hear this, but don't listen to those people who are attacking you on this thread, or implying that you are trying to insult all Nigerian men. You are just looking out for the best interests of your friend. Been in a similar, sticky situation before, where 2 friends and I actually found out our other friend's boyfriend had another chick he had been dating for years, and even had the nerve to buy them both the same exact Christmas gift. Confirmed with the other girl and everything and there was no doubt he was HER MAN too. Yet, what do you think happened, the friend turned on us. Some women just get effed up in the head when in love.

All you can do is help her see the light; you can bring the horse to the water but you can't make her drink. Don't get mad at her if she doesn't listen to you. It sounds like you have a better grasp of different resources that can be used to investigate the issue and weigh all options than your friend does, such as the advice you received from the attorney. Plus your friend is probably so wrapped up maybe deep down she's not ready to accept what could be the truth.

If she starts catching an attitude with you about it though, you probably need to fall back because sad to say, nothing can tear a friendship apart faster than a man. Women are too freaking complicated,

You ain't lying! You are right. If her friend wants to cop an attitude she should fall back and still be there for her when she needs a shoulder to cry or laugh on.

claremont:

If Lisasmiles and Mrs.Chima are the perfect examples of the average black American woman, then I won't even advise my worst enemy to get married to a black American lady. The attitude both of them have displayed on this forum leaves much to be desired, why would a Nigerian man want to give himself a premature death due to stress just because he wants to marry a black American lady?! If you guys hate Nigerian men so much, then there is really no need to be on this forum; simply create your own Nigerian men bashing forum and post there!
As for Lisasmiles, I bet you if your friend's boyfriend was white or was black British, you wouldn't try to run down the relationship with the same vigour and enthusiasm you are doing now. Go right ahead and take Mrs. Chima's advice, spoil the relationship with everything you can, but just remember, Karma is always a prick; I wish your friend well in finding a man you will eventually approve of, Good luck to you too!

Do not confuse me with your mother. You do not know what I am. Don't assume what you don't know. If you have an issue with me keeping it real then I suggest YOU DO NOT READ ANY OF MY POSTS because it will Bleep you up ENTIRELY.

Next time read my posts with CAUTION and man the Bleep up or kill yourself. Take that nigga Creamy with ya.

creamofluv:

@shelylilly - Thanks, mrs chima just spitting venom on here

@claremont -  well said claremont, that says it all, if it was a black british would she go through all that hassles and all, and she called her self a christian, christian my foot. Mind your own business, you putting effort into someone else business granted shes your friend, I will advice you to channel your energy into banging your hubby day in day out atleast that will get rid of your idleness

You should mind your own business as well. Why would you tell someone what they should do that YOU ARE NOT doing yourself?

Lead by example and maybe she will follow. DUH.

\

shelylilly:

mrs chima , we shouldnt insult anyone, on this thread, everyone has spoken and its left
for lisasmiles to leave her friend alone and let her carry on with their lifes, but please it doesnt
speak well encouraging people to be painting other people what they are not,
lisasmiles on her own part has done what needs to be done as friend, but she only needs to advise
her friend, guard her, and encourage her to have a go, who knows , but i still beleive the guy has good intention

First of all I did not INSULT ANYONE YET. I spoke my mind and OTHERS DIDN'T LIKE WHAT I SAID. TOUGH. I am not here to please ANYONE nor give a Bleep how anyone else feels. I said what I said and stand on it.

Don't start none WON'T BE NONE. That's goes for everybody including Jaybee.

@mrs chima - what a douche bag you are am not the one butting into someone Else's business, making it as my business,  I only got on ya back as your just spitting venom in your post and I hope its bite that black Bottom of yours, you think keeping it real is spitting poo that you know jack poo about. Your a total knob head

creamofluv:

@mrs chima - what a douche bag you are am not the one butting into someone Else's business, making it as my business,  I only got on ya back as your just spitting venom in your post and I hope its bite that black Bottom of yours, you think keeping it real is spitting poo that you know jack poo about. Your a total knob head

I have also monitored Mrs.Chima's posts in Nairaland, and I must say she is a total disgrace to the female black American race. I hate negative stereotypes, but it's hard not to be stereotypical about female black American's, when one has read the sheer disdain and cynicism Mrs.Chima and her likes hold for Nigerian men. She just goes around Nairaland spewing negativity and vile, and I have just ignored her until this issue came up. Cynical, negative minded people like Mrs.Chima and Lisasmiles will be better off locked in a room telling their tales of woes to each other, they will fit each other just nicely!

claremont:

I have also monitored Mrs.Chima's posts in Nairaland, and I must say she is a total disgrace to the female black American race. I hate negative stereotypes, but it's hard not to be stereotypical about female black American's, when one has read the sheer disdain and cynicism Mrs.Chima and her likes hold for Nigerian men. She just goes around Nairaland spewing negativity and vile, and I have just ignored her until this issue came up. Cynical, negative minded people like Mrs.Chima and Lisasmiles will be better off locked in a room telling their tales of woes to each other, they will fit each other just nicely!

I have officially PISSED YOU OFF.  Thank you for falling for the trap.  Dummies do it EVERY TIME.

Now since we are playing WHO CAN STEREOTYPE THE MOST.  Let me show you how to REALLY DO IT. 

You sound like the TYPICAL Nigerian Scammer who lives in the village WITH extremely poor family and only comes to the city when he can stealmustered up enough kobo for cyber cafe time. 

You are pissed that you chatted up with the wrong chick from Germany who you thought was an easy prey but found out that you was chatting with a male the ENTIRE time not a good image for a novice scammer. 

When NEPA takes your light YOU BURNS candle until the last flicker and cries yourself to sleep because you can only eat one meal a day with a cold glass of pissy water. 

You share a bed with nine babies and ten cousins which you wake up with piss stains on your week old fruit of loom thong which you wash one a week due to lack of soap. 

You are not the ONLY one who can stereotype and [size=44pt]YOU ARE A DISGRACE TO HIGH CALIBER Nigerian men.   Salut!  [/size]

By the way, keep THINKING you know whom you are talking to. YOU HAVE NO IDEA.

creamofluv:

@mrs chima - what a d[b]ouche bag [/b]you are am not the one butting into someone Else's business, making it as my business,  I only got on ya back as your just spitting venom in your post and I hope its bite that black Bottom of yours, you think keeping it real is spitting poo that you know jack poo about. Your a t[b]otal knob head[/b]

So are you.  Mind your business HYPOCRITE.

Keeping it real sure got you FIRED UP. Keep bitching. You might stop cramping, BIATCH.

claremont:

I have also monitored Mrs.Chima's posts in Nairaland, and I must say she is a total disgrace to the female black American race. I hate negative stereotypes, but it's hard not to be stereotypical about female black American's, when one has read the sheer disdain and cynicism Mrs.Chima and her likes hold for Nigerian men. She just goes around Nairaland spewing negativity and vile, and I have just ignored her until this issue came up. Cynical, negative minded people like Mrs.Chima and Lisasmiles will be better off locked in a room telling their tales of woes to each other, they will fit each other just nicely!

You couldn't be monitoring me well if YOU DIDN'T SEE ME TELL Lisa to LET HER FRIEND experience life and STILL BE THERE FOR HER WHEN SHE NEEDS A SHOULDER to cry and laugh on. 

Are you having issuing comprehending written words?  Because NO WHERE on this THREAD I stated anything VILE but to tell YOU defensive mofos TO READ WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING AND NOT ASSUME WHAT THEY ARE SAYING. 

YOU SHOULD BE THE VERY LAST NIGGA to tell anybody that they shouldn't be NEGATIVE AND VILE.  90% of your posts is about YOU CAN'T GET NO PLAY AND NEGATIVE ABOUT EVERY DAMN THING including your complaints about why your Joystick won't erect properly. 

Real Nigerian men DO NOT FIGHT NOR ARGUE WITH WOMEN. I have seen you argued with several women on this site. You got DOWNLOW tendencies.

Its amazing how some of the "Nigerian men" on this thread have handled this simple question asked buy someone who's looking out for her friend and have turned it into an insult circus.

Also, I am wondering why the poster is being insulted so much, only because she is trying to get some info. Y'all just make the bad reputation thing sound 110% true. So many insults hurled at her, and I am yet to see one insult or negative comment from her.

You guys should relax. Its geting so irritating with all the continous rants about jealousy and all that.

Fancy giving a dog a bad name in order to hang it.

@Mrs.Chima - How reta.rded can you be? You call yourself MrsChima and your profile says Male, what are you? a fecking TVs? I will lay vengeance upon you, ya think am just some dude you can throw your little punch at that won't give you back, I have mouth like basket, I will give you back in 100 folds. You feckin M.oron

Lisa how do we know you are not the one in this situation. I do not think there is a friend anywhere, the time and effort you have put into this your Nancy Drew investigation; contacting your Lawyer, asking immigration, contacting his wife on FB. Dayum gurl, you either have too much time on your hand or the guy is dicking you so good that you are finding it hard to let go!!!!!!!!!! close your legs to married men is all i gat to say

@crazychica,  bist du noch da.? jetzt habe ich zeit für dich. man du bist der hammer! Hab ich dir schon erzählt? ohne witze,  du solltest dich mal bei einem pyschologen untersuchen lassen.Dein verhalten ist so agressiv und ärgern halts dich fest ,   alles gutes,                                                                                                           @poster, if u are sure what u `re doing is right,  go on, but if it turns out u were wrong in the future,  what are u gonna do then?  beware of karma,     he can be 4 real or the other way round,  no one can tell, 

@deekay29 - First of all maybe you do not have true friends where you are from. Second of all I am married and has been for ten years. Third I have no problem with the man that my friend is with. He appears to be a very decent man(except for this hidden secret). Fouth if you read my other post they are not intimate(sex is not everything for everyone). I do have a lot of time on my hands when a friend that is like a sister to me is involved. You are right my HUSBAND IS SO GOOD IT IS HARD FOR ME TO LET HIM GO.

@nanidee2 - Thank You!!

@ Mrs.Chima - Thank You I agree the one thing that I did learn from NL, is to KEEP MY PRIVATE LIFE PERSONAL. Thank for the heads up. Yor are right I pretty MUCH gotten all the answers I needed.
I agree some of the comments from the people were very redundant and repetitive, But I can not change them.

@For all who gave sound advice. I will take everything with a grain of salt and for my friend well-being I hope all turn out well for her.

Thanks All no more posts from me signing off!!! For the person who said that this sight is not for me. I must say you are right, but I do admire some of the people who give good advice on it.