After over a year of marriage and with a child, my friend just discovered recently that the husband is a drop out while the guy made her believe all this while that he's a graduate. Don't blame my friend 'cos she was just an understanding woman who had faith in her man when he claimed h doesn't want to work under anybody but will rather establish himself. Initially, he was able to provide for the family by doing this and that (I don't really know what that means). Now the upkeep of the family is on my friend and she's already getting pissed. The husband nowadays is content with watching movies all day long and his runs no longer bring in money. To crown it all, complex is already setting in cos my friend is a master's holder.
The question is what will you do in her shoes?

your friend should have done her homework properly before walking down the aisle

The only solution on the table for her is to first go for family planning, and then help set up a viable business if she is buoyant enough.

There are times that despite doing your homework to the best of your abilities, the deceit of men cannot be unveiled plus we only allow ourselves to see what we want at times.

damilolami:

There are times that despite doing your homework to the best of your abilities, the deceit of men cannot be unveiled plus we only allow ourselves to see what we want at times.

What's important to you in life? An educated man or a man worthy to be called a husband?

damilolami:

There are times that despite doing your homework to the best of your abilities, the deceit of men cannot be unveiled plus we only allow ourselves to see what we want at times.

I take it that they only dated for like 2months then get married. . . . . .

Who forced her ? Who rushed her ? She must deal with the consequences of her decision.

//

Is it the degree thats a problem or the inability to bring in money?

I am sure the woman in question would not mind a Dangote even without the degree

Well the man does not have degree and he no get money worst part he watches movie all day long plus the complex now that she has a masters degree. I guess she just has work with what she has.

chaircover:

[b]This story further confirms the reason why us women need to take off our rose tinted specs for a minute and scrutinize our men very very well b[/b]efore we say I do because once the ring goes on the finger and pikins are involved, we are the ones who have to deal with the most ish when these men mess up.

Not much your friend can do at this point but to stop seeing this as a "his" problem but an "our" problem and she better start pressing all buttons possible to get that man into a job before things get any worse than this. Watching movies on the sofa will soon become "so because you are feeding me you think you can talk to me anyhow"  . . . . even if the wifey didnt say anything rude to him.

Once the man is settled in a job, then they can start looking at finishing his degree on a part time or online basis even if its only for egoistic reasons & it doesn't really bring any financial value to him 

God will help us women.

True that.

@poster

I feel you oh. But unlike your friend, i did my homework well and thank goodness we didn't even get to the dating stage.

I once met this young, Ibo guy that wanted me to date him.
He was goodlooking, dressed well, drove a nice car, well travelled, co-owned a thriving business . . . . all the works.

I did ask him about his educational background and he claimed he schooled at Ghana 

Anyways, beneath it all, i noticed he showed signs of inferiority complex and sometimes he could not talk or argue intelligently.

i digged further and i discovered that he was not educated beyond secondary school cert.

all i did was call him and i told him what i had discovered and asked why he had to lie and that effectively ended all ''Funke, please be my LOLO'' lines from him 

what put me off was the LIE.

Oya Funke be my Loolo

I am a JS3 drop out

dayokanu:

Oya Funke be my Loolo

I am a JS3 drop out

hhahhahahahhah.

no, thank you.

i'll pass

dayokanu:

Is it the degree thats a problem or the inability to bring in money?

I am sure the woman in question would not mind a Dangote even without the degree

Personally, I don't see the degree as a big deal. It's however important to bring in money for the family upkeep as the head of the house. That is not also a big deal but the big deal as far as I am concerned is the fact that he lied to her for that number of years. That man can actually kill her or what do you think?

r231:

I take it that they only dated for like 2months then get married. . . . . .

They actually dated for close to two years but you men now,

chaircover:

This story further confirms the reason why us women need to take off our rose tinted specs for a minute and scrutinize our men very very well before we say I do because once the ring goes on the finger and pikins are involved, we are the ones who have to deal with the most ish when these men mess up.

Not much your friend can do at this point but to stop seeing this as a "his" problem but an "our" problem and she better start pressing all buttons possible to get that man into a job before things get any worse than this. Watching movies on the sofa will soon become "so because you are feeding me you think you can talk to me anyhow" . . . . even if the wifey didnt say anything rude to him.

Once the man is settled in a job, then they can start looking at finishing his degree on a part time or online basis even if its only for egoistic reasons & it doesn't really bring any financial value to him

God will help us women.

I concur because I cannot advise her to divorce her husband. She can only be supportive and be more careful in dealing with him.

damilolami:

Personally, I don't see the degree as a big deal. It's however important to bring in money for the family upkeep as the head of the house. That is not also a big deal but the big deal as far as I am concerned is the fact that he lied to her for that number of years. That man can actually kill her or what do you think?

Most women probably lie about the number of sexual partners they have had or how vast their sexual experience is, So those kind of women can kill or what do you think?

damilolami:

Personally, I don't see the degree as a big deal. It's however important to bring in money for the family upkeep as the head of the house. That is not also a big deal but the big deal as far as I am concerned is the fact that he lied to her for that number of years. That man can actually kill her or what do you think?

kill her on top wetin HABA

so the man lied about his educational background big deal. . . . does that make him a murderer?

damilolami:

They actually dated for close to two years but you men now,

2yrs . . . . pls don't even try to say you knw men now cus upon all the degree and masters you friend have she still can't figure out a daylight from night. . .

so for 2yrs she didnt meet any of the guys family that she can ask question?

not even a simple graduation picture even doh its not enough proof cus pple borrow dat dis days

but at least she can use style to ask the boys family/parents before they got married

Bill Gates is a drop out.
Tuface did not finish school.
Zuckerberg is not a graduate.
Dangote does not hold a degree.


However,i think your friend should hv scruitinize d guy very. I can never fall 4 such a long term deceit.
What happened to courtship? Our was it just 4 eating in d eatery?
Was your friend a desperado?
Did she ever bother 2 ask 4 his graduation brochure,picture,nysc year bk or pix?
Is she the type that get attracted to the container rather than d content like many ladies do?


Your frnd shld be any1 of these:desperado,greedy or stoopid. Just say i may be wrong.

If am her i will first divorce/separate with him for decieving me 'cos i cant love him again.

Na wah O! This kind of 419 is on another level. The woman should encourage him to start a small business and as Jay bee said family planning is important for now.

Un-necessary fighting in a family

Does that certificate put food on the table?

If your man is lazy,you can address that but not issue of graduate.

Which kain complex?

Tell the Lazy man to be smart enough to care for his family and you see the wife with MSE worshipping him.

he should go back to school, or what will he be doing? at home, babysit or watch tv 24/7 for the rest of his life? abegiii let him enrol back in school jare!!!!

She should keep quiet and support her man, useless small girl.

my dear,

going back might not solv d problm,she hv to oganiz hrslf and face family lif,sh can start smol biz if posibl,sh shld not b lazy or els hungary will bot & their kid.

It is not a disease to be a dropout! He should have been truthful to her before the marriage by letting her know that he's a dropout.

The guy made the mistake and it's a sad story that's the only way he could woo the lady to marry him. On the right note, if the man can't find a job and take care of the family responsibility the woman should separate from him.But, if she could really take care of the family she should do so for the sake of the kids. One important thing is that he has already lost all respect and trust!

Education is good, but it is not the be all and end all ! We have so many Billionaires and Millionaires in the world today, that only managed GCSE's.
They both need to work together as a team, and find a niche or common ground in the business world, that they both would enjoy doing and making money from doing.
If she is so keen on having a graduate as a husband, what about adult education, afterall, we are not too old to learn !!!!

^^^^
Why would he has to lie to her in the first case that he's a graduate whereas he's a dropout!? That is the bone of contention in this issue. The truth must be told the man has erred! He sucks! I better tell her who I am than regret things for the rest of my life. There is already a sense of cheat in the family!

Tell your friend to ask Bill Gate he was also a drop out, I'm sure Bill Gate will give your friend some idea because whether drop out or no drop out so long as you are in Nigeria my sister your certificate can hardly feed you, I guess all he needs to do is hustle a bit more. I know loads of graduates in Nigeria without any job

Yeah, my Dad pretended that he was the most brilliant student and gave me a very hard time for not being the best in my class, even calling me "stupid" one day, despite the fact that I had scholarships and graduated with magna cum laude honors. It wasn't until after he had passed away that I saw his certificate and discovered that he finished with only a 2:2. I was so pissed off! He had lied to me for more than two decades!

Since when has having a degree got to do with taking care of your family, did any of our fore fathers have a degree, the only problem i see is that the man in said question is not taking care of his family, that is all, for me i think the guy was involved in 419 hence the reason we could not be told the kind of jobs he does, the fact that he watches movies day and night suggest he never really had to leave home to work (dear you choose money over common sense) i have a friend who did not have a degree when he got married to his wife who had a bsc but he worked hard and took care of his family and in the process his wife helped he start school, now my friend is a master degree holder with many other certification to add to it, a real wife will help her husband get to where he should get

What a baseless story. I'm a drop out and i'm proud of the decision i took. Why won't i be when i earn fives times what a b.sc banker earns monthly. Please i'm not bragging, i just want you to understand that a degree is not a requisite for financial freedom.

I dont have any problem with the guy being a drop out or whatever. So many drop outs there who are doing great. But please, why the deceit? The foundation of their union was based on deceit. If he could lie on something as important as that, who knows how many more things he is hidding. This is WICKEDNESS.