I do not see my partner fighting or keeping malice with anyone however, should that happen, I wouldn't get myself involved.

Bahamas95:
It depends on what transpired. But if it's just normal women stuff I can decide to ignore if it's not serious.


My baby is not troublesome, I am 100% sure of that......If anybody messes with her that means he/she has indirectly done same to me. I go carry the matter for head like gele.

Don't be 100% sure, make she no shock you at when due...

Chingyyy878:
I mean if someone hurts your partner , will you see the person as your enemy ?

Never I won't try it

Chingyyy878:
I mean if someone hurts your partner , will you see the person as your enemy ?

normal thing
There’s a saying that goes
The enemy of my friend is also my enemy

If you’re a friend to my enemy, that makes you frenemy!!

Periodtt

Chingyyy878:
I mean if someone hurts your partner , will you see the person as your enemy ?

Immediately yes. lol.

cococandy:


Immediately yes. lol.

If you're my partner, and my enemy is not your enemy just forget the relationship.

Acidosis:

I don’t even know why it’s a question. You hurt my person, me and you will have problems for life. Period.

cococandy:


I don’t even know why it’s a question. You hurt my person, me and you will have problems for life. Period.

As it should be

I will back my wife even if she is wrong.

You become my enemy by default if you cross my wife.

cococandy:


I don’t even know why it’s a question. You hurt my person, me and you will have problems for life. Period.

I read some comments and was wondering the kind of relationship people are into that warranted such comments

I thought couples should have common interest and enemy

I dont

Capital no.

tosyne2much:
I read some comments and was wondering the kind of relationship people are into that warranted such comments

I thought couples should have common interest and enemy

Couple do not have common enemy.
Let's be realistic

Acidosis:


Automatically..! You touch one, you touch all. That's how we roll. But I'll still try to mediate sha.

You don't know what you are talking about.
In some families, they never accepted the wife. And it may be a wel known fact that either parents or siblings don't just like the wife.
What do you do?

Forget all about your parents or siblings because of your wife?
Or you have a baby mama who naturally should be hated by your wife, will you now hate her cos your wife hate her?
She has your kids. Eg
Tuface is a perfect example.

We talk cos we don't wear the shoe.
I have seen a brother inlaw that hate his brothers wife for no just cause. Husband tried, no way.
What he did is to move his family away from his brother. He is still his brother. Just that the brother and the wife have nothing in common.

And yes, in Nigerian setting, if family members are beafing with the wife, husband most likely ignore and mediate from the side but they will never have beaf with their family members. Impossible. I also don't encourage that.

descarado:

You don't know what you are talking about.
In some families, they never accepted the wife. And it may be a wel known fact that either parents or siblings don't just like the wife.
What do you do?

Forget all about your parents or siblings because of your wife?
Or you have a baby mama who naturally should be hated by your wife, will you now hate her cos your wife hate her?
She has your kids. Eg
Tuface is a perfect example.

We talk cos we don't wear the shoe.
I have seen a brother inlaw that hate his brothers wife for no just cause. Husband tried, no way.
What he did is to move his family away from his brother. He is still his brother. Just that the brother and the wife have nothing in common.

And yes, in Nigerian setting, if family members are beafing with the wife, husband most likely ignore and mediate from the side but they will never have beaf with their family members. Impossible. I also don't encourage that.

I think the emboldened settles it. There are certain shoes I can't wear. Any decision I take regarding my spouse will be based on my personal experiences with her, not the encounters of a third-party with her.

However, as previously mentioned, there are situations where I'll try to mediate (since you only focused on family beef). In such a situation, taking sides with my partner does not invalidate the role of mediation. Remember this is about her beef with an outsider not spousal disagreements.

NB: I did not marry a woman who is hated by my family, but if such a situation were to ever occur, my decision to proceed with the marriage would already signify taking sides with her.

cococandy:


I don’t even know why it’s a question. You hurt my person, me and you will have problems for life. Period.

That's a very dangerous precedence.

Elders always advocate never to take side. They have their reasons.
As we age, we see why they always say that.
Annie idibia is not in speaking terms with tuface child mamas. Should tuface do the same?
You know the answer and to Annie and those in her shoe, that's the right thing to do. Tuface should support her.

Also, in some families, a wife is never wholly accepted. Someone somewhere in that family don't really like her, the husband should take the side of the wife in your opinion?

As for what happens outside, spouse maybe lying. It's his business and has nothing to do with me.
I won't put my head to defend what I don't understand before it will cost me my life and oga will continue with his life as soon as I had passed away.
Marriage is not sustained by rioting emotions rather wisdom.
As a matter of fact, this was one of the wise sayings laid down to me during my trado on both sides to never involve myself in what does not concern me.
I will rather be a mediator.

advanceDNA:


U are still asking....?? Which kind partner u be?

.....if anybody dey tackle my paddii seff, the person don automatically enter my tackle list .....let alone my partner.... we die there ooo

Nor do that thing bro.

Acidosis:


I think the emboldened settles it. There are certain shoes I can't wear. Any decision I take regarding my spouse will be based on my personal experiences with her, not the encounters of a third-party with her.

However, as previously mentioned, there are situations where I'll try to mediate (since you only focused on family beef). In such a situation, taking sides with my partner does not invalidate the role of mediation. Remember this is about her beef with an outsider not spousal disagreements.

NB: I did not marry a woman who is hated by my family, but if such a situation were to ever occur, my decision to proceed with the marriage would already signify taking sides with her.

Family members are outsiders too.

Even if one member of the family don't like her for reason best know to the person and as a result, don't talk to her will you stop talking to the person?

descarado:

Family members are outsiders too.

Even if one member of the family don't like her for reason best know to the person and as a result, don't talk to her will you stop talking to the person?

A big "Yes"

I will only talk to you to mediate. We will literally have nothing else to discuss.

Acidosis:


A big "Yes"

I will only talk to you to mediate. We will literally have nothing else to discuss.

OK o.

I will never advocate for that.

It makes it worst.

And you are not a good leader by doing so.
Your kids are watching.

sylve11:


Nor do that thing bro.

Do wetin....

Person wey dey fight your partner sef fit dey target u cos e fit assume say una go don dey collabo.... ...if u lose guard u go collect.... Stay alert

descarado:

OK o.

I will never advocate for that.

It makes it worst.

And you are not a good leader by doing so.
Your kids are watching.

Even my kids would be surprised that I'm not standing by their mother. Anyone who can fight (beef) your wife to the point of not talking to her will not respect you. Engaging in conversations with such individuals will only amplify the disrespect. It's only a matter of time before they come after you as well. They will insult your wife in the middle of conversations and come for you after a while.

If you want to experience maximum disrespect, start talking to someone who doesn't rate your spouse.

descarado:


That's a very dangerous precedence.

Elders always advocate never to take side. They have their reasons.
As we age, we see why they always say that.
Annie idibia is not in speaking terms with tuface child mamas. Should tuface do the same?
You know the answer and to Annie and those in her shoe, that's the right thing to do. Tuface should support her.

Also, in some families, a wife is never wholly accepted. Someone somewhere in that family don't really like her, the husband should take the side of the wife in your opinion?

As for what happens outside, spouse maybe lying. It's his business and has nothing to do with me.
I won't put my head to defend what I don't understand before it will cost me my life and oga will continue with his life as soon as I had passed away.
Marriage is not sustained by rioting emotions rather wisdom.
As a matter of fact, this was one of the wise sayings laid down to me during my trado on both sides to never involve myself in what does not concern me.
I will rather be a mediator.

So, the wise saying laid down to you during your own trado was that should any family member arise to frustrate your wife because they don't really like her, you will stay neutral without taking sides?

Acidosis:



Even my kids would be surprised that I'm not standing by their mother. Anyone who can fight (beef) your wife to the point of not talking to her will not respect you. Engaging in conversations with such individuals will only amplify the disrespect. It's only a matter of time before they come after you as well. They will insult your wife in the middle of conversations and come for you after a while.

If you want to experience maximum disrespect, start talking to someone who doesn't rate your spouse.

May God bless you for this comment... Some people are just funny sha

Do you know that some men have so much protected their wives and children that when they pass away, dem no born any family member well to start frustrating the wife and children

advanceDNA:


Do wetin....

Person wey dey fight your partner sef fit dey target u cos e fit assume say una go don dey collabo.... ...if u lose guard u go collect.... Stay alert

If you understand sey humans fit change then you go understand why I said so.

advanceDNA:


U are still asking....?? Which kind partner u be?

.....if anybody dey tackle my paddii seff, the person don automatically enter my tackle list .....let alone my partner.... we die there ooo

You dey say nonsense.. What if na ur paddi or partner go tackle person wey dey him or her own jeje?

Make una dey reason b4 u misyarn

DenreleDave:


You dey say nonsense.. What if na ur paddi or partner go tackle person wey dey him or her own jeje?

Make una dey reason b4 u misyarn

Me I no get paddi wey dey go look for trouble......so na u no dey reason wey dey talk nonsense

sylve11:


If you understand sey humans fit change then you go understand why I said so.

What is this oga saying?? Abeg shift ...u just dey jump from one point to another.....
...... When they are still ur real friends and family...u do what friends and family do: u remain loyal and supportive.

..and when they change...then u seize to be their paddi, u seff change..... I get loyal friends ooo

Depends on the kind of beef. If e no make sense I go troway face comot, but if it is a very serious beef, I go carry am like bone straight weave

I can hold malice, I will look for way to settle the matter by talking to my partner privately first

I see your point But the baby mama didn’t hurt tuface sha.
He’s entirely the person at fault so what ground should Annie take sides with him? Like those women that shield their cheating and abusive husbands to only go after the side piece. You already know my feelings and opinions about those kinds of people 🫢

I mean if someone hurts your partner , will you see the person as your enemy ?

My answer here is based specifically on the question of if someone hurts my person will I have problems with that person? Absolutely yes.

descarado:


That's a very dangerous precedence.

Elders always advocate never to take side. They have their reasons.
As we age, we see why they always say that.
Annie idibia is not in speaking terms with tuface child mamas. Should tuface do the same?
You know the answer and to Annie and those in her shoe, that's the right thing to do. Tuface should support her.

Also, in some families, a wife is never wholly accepted. Someone somewhere in that family don't really like her, the husband should take the side of the wife in your opinion?

As for what happens outside, spouse maybe lying. It's his business and has nothing to do with me.
I won't put my head to defend what I don't understand before it will cost me my life and oga will continue with his life as soon as I had passed away.
Marriage is not sustained by rioting emotions rather wisdom.
As a matter of fact, this was one of the wise sayings laid down to me during my trado on both sides to never involve myself in what does not concern me.
I will rather be a mediator.