she got married early last year to her[b] 1 nd only luv[/b] (dt hw she puts it). By feb. she became pregnant, 4 months later due to the stress of d pregnancy her husband adviced that she should stay wth her mum, since this was her first. She obeyed as a lovin wife, early oct. she lost d pregnancy due to complications. She decided to go home to rest, but she noticed dt her neighbours were avoiding her. two weeks ago she found out that her husband was bringing girls into their home while she was wth her mum. she confronted him and decided to trace his movement, she found another bitter truth( his got another kid outside).

She truly loves dis guy die, she is confused . she presently wth me wat do i advice her to do?

Me i don tire

she should go back to her home and take charge, if she leaves him, he will marry another and life would continue, since she still loves him, she should iron things out with her hubby, now, if he says he is no longer interested, then she can file for the divorce.

How old is the child outside?

How can she be sure he has not remarried or she is even the second wife hence reason the neighbours were avoiding her

Any decision she makes is correct, including leaving this irresponsible man, how did she end up marrying him in the first place, was there courtship before the marriage?

How old is the child outside?
Is she still interested in the marriage and man?
Is the man repentant,remorseful and still ready to partner and tag team with her?

No one but her can make this decision.I wish she thinks things out thorougly and without any external influence and advicers.Wish her the best.

Men are nature born cheat nd d fact dey cheat dsnt me dey dnt love u its just thier nature i tnk she should sit her hus dwn nd have a long sensitive with hym if he realy lves u he wuld apologize evrytin startz wit a step

^^^ natural born cheats, like programmed to cheat from creation? Then its not their fault then!

@OP

Where did you read this story?

Sandrachioma:

Men are nature born cheat nd d fact dey cheat dsnt me dey dnt love u its just thier nature i tnk she should sit her hus dwn nd have a long sensitive with hym if he realy lves u he wuld apologize evrytin startz wit a step

Speak for the men in your life. My father and my husband are not "natural born cheats". There are men who take pride in keeping their home. Don't paint the ones that work hard as cheats because you choose to accept someone treating you like garbage

Sandrachioma:

Men are nature born cheat nd d fact dey cheat dsnt me dey dnt love u its just thier nature i tnk she should sit her hus dwn nd have a long sensitive with hym if he realy lves u he wuld apologize evrytin startz wit a step

He would apologise and go back to cheating.

ronkebp:

He would apologise and go back to cheating.

That's basically what she is saying. Why should he even apologize. It is his nature

And why would she leave her home for so long?I'm not excusing d hubby's infidelity (there's no justification for that) but then women should learn to stop leaving vaccum in their homes for strangers. She should go back home and straighten out issues with her hubby b4 another stranger takes over

Y on earth will she leave her home for her mothers place because she was pregnant? Did she marry her hubby just for the sake of getting pregnant, incubating a baby and delivering it? What happened to her other roles as a wife?

Let her go back to her house and put things in order.

This also goes out to ladies out there, when a man asks you to return to your mother's house (after marriage) for whatever reasons, don't be in such a hurry to leave. He may have bigger plans. But it all depends on the man.

spyder880:

^^^ natural born cheats, like programmed to cheat from creation? Then its not their fault then!

Abi

jumie:

Y on earth will she leave her home for her mothers place because she was pregnant? Did she marry her hubby just for the sake of getting pregnant, incubating a baby and delivering it? What happened to her other roles as a wife?

Let her go back to her house and put things in order.

This also goes out to ladies out there, when a man asks you to return to your mother's house (after marriage) for whatever reasons, don't be in such a hurry to leave. He may have bigger plans. But it all depends on the man.

Go back and read it. She was having complications with teh pregnancy and her husband could not handle it. She even tually lost the baby. She is not her husband's bodyguard. theidea that she must stay there because her husband is up to something is ridiculous. If you have to play bodyguard to your husband to prevent him from cheating you are the one that will run mad and he will still cheat anyway

.

It is his responsibility to look after you but if he says he will not do you stay there and die? No. You go to were you will get the care and come back with the baby hopefully with no complications. I had some complications with my first pregnancy. My sister has to be on IV through out most of the duration on every single pregnancy. Imagine if her husband was not the type that would make all the meals she needs to eat before he runs off to work. She would have not been here today. Infact there were times she had to call 911 when she was home alone and the IV to her heart came out. If someone dies have they saved the marriage?

.

I don't disagree with you that it his responsibilty but he does not want it. That is why I support her going away until unfortunately in her case she lost it. I truly don't understand men that do not understand their responsibilities. Although I believe that many women in this case contribute to it

What is her threshold for pain ?
Once she knows this, it will help her decide how many more years she can remain with lover boy and how many more affairs she can tolerate , also the amount of babies and baby mamas she will allow

while she is at it, she may want to start saying or muttering to herself " I know i deserve better and i will surely get better, as i become courageous and believe in myself"

chaircover:

Outstrip, it is the husbads responsibility to look after his wife. If he is not around then he should get someone from either side to stay with his wife in their own home. That is what responsilility and being a husband is about. You dont cart her back to her parents house so that you now have the house to yourself and get up to infidelity.

I had difficult pregnancies too and I remember that my husband used to make me amala and okro every single morning before putting on his tie and going to work  . . . . . He was the one who got me pregnant; not my mother.

The man is a stuppid man. Its just that Nigeran wommen somehow find/put themselves into corners all in the name of love and I must get married by force and that is why boys who should still be in pampers are getting women to marry them.

Well spoken!!!

Outstrip:

Go back and read it. She was having complications with teh pregnancy and her husband could not handle it. She even tually lost the baby. She is not her husband's bodyguard. theidea that she must stay there because her husband is up to something is ridiculous. If you have to play bodyguard to your husband to prevent him from cheating you are the one that will run mad and he will still cheat anyway

Don't you think it's his responsibility to look after his wife? What stopped him from inviting her mum over or his mum (whatever the case) to look after her?