One day you'll be sitting inside a shack
You'll remember all the opportunities you have missed, your eight kids with different fathers will be crying telling you that they want to eat.
Your house will be empty, they'll be nothing to give them.
Every chance you get you'll remember not paying attention at school.
You'll remember not listening to your parents when they tell you about taking care of your life.
You'll remember all the boyfriends who used to sleep with you,
The cars that used to drop you off in the morning.
You'll remember it all.
Now that you have nothing.
Every same ex-boyfriend acts like they dont see you.
They deny you.
You'll see wedding invitations to the wedding of the guy you played.
You'll see the girls you used to belittle living the life you always wanted.
The sun is cold and everyone is gone.
No one wants you.
You cry every night asking God, why is He doing all that to you.
God gave you a chance to make your life better
But you messed up.
He's still keeping you around so that you can turn your life around.
I say it's not too late to make your life better again.
Get up and do something. It won't be easy but at least try.
Try your best for your kids...���

@Olaiya4

The Fall of Grace

What happened, Grace?

What happened? We still wonder, even now. A girl is full of life. And everyone expected much from her.

It’s not a loss to lose a man who never deserved you.

I guess that’s why Grace broke up with me. We were good together but once she moved to another city

Our love was like the tail of two mountains we never met again.

We tried to keep the fire burning, but we couldn’t make a fire.

I would like to tell this story from the perspective of others and also of how she would have felt in that relationship.

I would like to start like this,

I met a lady, as beautiful as the full moon. Loved by everyone.

Walking down the street with her, felt like a movie. You know a lady is cute when kids on the street tell her that she’s cute. Sorry to bore you with details. But Grace was so precious to me, and she had that genuine smile that made my world a fantasy. Like any other relationship. We had our goals and ambitions. When a rough hand touches a fragile thing, they scratch it. Thinking about the bruises she carried hurt me. Thinking about our memories hurt me. Grace is gone and if maybe I had enough money, I would have kept her.

Darkness carried her to the other side.

Grace, whose life seemed like a dream to have,

In the midst of it all, we can look at Grace and blame her for what she did,

Black tax held her by the neck.

"Grace, you are working, please send us money"

"Grace, your daughter needs new clothes, send money"

"We don't have food, send money"

I need to do my hair, I need money

"Landlord needs rent, please send money"

"Send money"

"Send money"

"Send money"

She cracks, every month because of one word.

"Money"

Hi sweetheart where are you going?

The fall of Grace began that one afternoon when a blue Mercedes car stopped and she got a ride home.

Her love life was beginning to start a new fairy tale.

Her life began to be more interesting. So, they thought.

Imagine seeing the person you consider, the love of your life posting pictures with another guy in some expensive resort, I remember calling Grace with my heart dancing outside of my chest.

“Who’s that guy, you are taking pictures with? I asked hesitantly

“He’s my boss and he paid for all of us to come to this place and have fun for the weekend”. This tale made no sense at all. I was glad that Grace finally got a job to support her family and her daughter. I asked further about the whole thing but she just said she’ll get back to me. After trying so hard to get hold of Grace three days later she called and she told me that she was held up by her work. I didn’t want to sound like a jealous boyfriend or anything like that. I just told her that she should work hard and get recognized by the company. Grace was working hard, two months after the weekend getaway, Grace, the love of my life got a promotion which changed her life forever. This promotion changed our love life forever.

“Let's dance in style, let's dance for a while

Heaven can wait we're only watching the skies

Hoping for the best, but expecting the worst

Are you gonna drop the bomb or not?”

Indeed, she dropped the bomb on my head. My world shattered like a thunderclap

I just lost the love of my life. And every memory hurts.

Just when I thought that our love life would grow stronger, everything changed.

She got into a new relationship. I held on to the scraps she left me with. She didn’t want me to see my daughter anymore. She moved her away from me.

She moved in with her new hubby. What hurt me the most is that the guy she was telling me to not worry about was fucking her up and getting her pregnant.

They got married.

They got divorced. But her pain never ceased.

Oh, Grace. What happened my love?

I never thought I will fear, fear as much as I did in that room.

That bed with thongs I lay cold in my blood.

The bed felt warmer with my blood.

The night felt longer with pain engulfing my entire body.

I had to go to work and look at the same man who broke me on my bed and call him boss.

He zipped his pants and walked out of the room.

A long list of events that would perhaps be a red flag to how he's going to treat me later on, I ignored them.

I watched my tears, excavating my emotions, I wanted to be strong but he cuts me deep.

I thought I would feel at home with him, but he wasn’t right for me. He is not right for me.

What happened to me?

What happened, Grace?

I peel away from this earth; my story will sound like a sad song to those who will later ask or know what happened to me.

“Grace, I am sorry for what I did, I promise it will never happen again”

Me and my boss, we would be happy again.

We would laugh and have dinners and all.

When a man just wants to use you, you’ll see with the treatment. Another red flag which I acted blindly towards.

He would ask me to have sex with another man simply because he wanted them to give him tenders.

I was a “wife” to him and also his sex worker. He used me to the point where I couldn’t take it anymore. But when you have nothing and you don’t want to go back to your old poverty life, you act strong and deep down of you, you tell yourself that maybe this man will change.

It hurt so much, I mean knowing so much that the person you love will never value you or look at you halfway across the room and tell you how he feels about you. The first time he told me that he loves it was when he was hitting me.

I never felt like he loves me but I have always told myself that he will change for me. I wanted to be a better wife than the one he had. I wanted to keep my job and support my family back home. In this madness of a relationship, the one thing I learnt is to never give a man who’s unapologetic a second chance. Stop being okay with how he’s treating you. I write with my eyes covered with stitches. I left someone I love because I wanted a better life. I don’t know if I will make it out of here. I don’t know if I will survive, dear ex-lover I am sorry to have dropped you like I did, if I die before I wake take care of our daughter. Teach her the love that you have always shown me. Teach her to be patient with life. Life is not easy, but I made mine harder. To my parents, I am sorry that I had to go before you. I just wanted to make you proud. I got the job but I was not happy after months. It’s okay now. I am going home. Home to where I come from. I will leave everything I have worked hard for. Sometimes someone doesn’t love you, they just want to use you for their benefit. He had a wife he later went back to. I was just a fresh girl he built his empire with. I am nothing. I am will end by saying, I died loving the man who used me for his business, I died a hoe everyone man had sex with because my boss wanted me to. I die a shameful death. If I didn’t go there, I wouldn’t have been in this mess. If I didn’t get in that car. I wouldn’t be as broken as I am. I wouldn’t cry as I do now. I wouldn’t cry

I wouldn’t

I wouldn’t have been used.

I wouldn’t…

Everyone looked and from their eyes, you can see that they all feel like they should have done something to help Grace.

A man soaked his face with rend, their last respect, so sublime.

He bites his lips in pain, his eyes red hot like lava. A pinch of a gasp, a sob from mob cracks and the soil mops.

A body would suddenly get weak, and it would fall. The fall of Grace,

Turned the whole community upside down.

Fury murmured; a sad song broke.

Grace, what happened?

A dead body does not know how to talk for itself.

From your bruise, you were hurt.

From your letters, we know what you were going through.

From the tears you have cried, we know you couldn’t be strong anymore.

Indeed, you are going home. To die no more.

You look down on us with your beautiful smile.

We know you would want to hug us and tell us that everything is alright.

Everything is okay now. Sleep well.

There is no pain there. Ahh, Grace.

Memories will live forever in the chambers of my mind. You loved me and that’s all I will forever be grateful for. Grace is gone and she left me with this amazing gift. Our Daughter.

The fall of Grace, to others, will indeed sound like a fall but to us who loved her, it is the rise of Grace…

She's gone and all I have is this disease

"I would sleep with him and later come sleep with you.
Every time we slept together
I would regret it and you would be the only person I would think about.
I would lie simply because I didn't want to lose you.
You are a good person and I regret having to hurt you and put you through everything that I have put you.
I know you are hurt and all but please forgive me, bae, forgive me
I love you, I love you so much"

I stood there listening to her lies.
I knew if she did it once, nothing will stop her from doing it again.
I had to feel sorry for myself for all the shit that
That she put me through.
I had to act strong because of all that she put me through.
I had sucked the breast that another man sucked
I had unprotected sex with someone who had just told another man that she doesn't like a condom.
I cried when I realised that I muffed a lady who just had sex with another man.
I asked how could I do that?
She said "bae I washed it"
The beat of my heart stopped.
The clock stopped
I remember following her to his room.
Later she told me that she was in her room the whole day sleeping.
"Sleeping with another man?" I asked
She shouted at me and walk out.
Later I apologised but I love her.
Imagine loving someone so much that even when they kill you, you still give them your last breath.
I was in pain
So I walked away.
Two weeks down the line
I felt lonely and I was on your butty again.
We fixed things but I knew deep down that I was not the same person anymore
We would have sex and I would see you with him.
I would kiss you and it felt like I was kissing another man.
Stupid
Stupid
Stupid
I was stupid in love.
You went on to sleep with my housemate.
I was stupid enough to laugh with the nigga while he's busy laughing behind my back smashing you.
You thought I wouldn't know?
I know everything you did that you think I don't know.
I know so much.
Like I know you did an abortion because you were not sure if the baby is mine or his.
I know it all, from the fake
"Bae I can't come over tonight, my granny is sick"
From
" I have to study, you know how important these tests are"
If you were so focused on your school why did you fall pregnant, while we haven't had sex in 8 weeks?
Why did you fail all your exams?
Why did you
Just tell me why?
Bleep man.

The last time we talked you told me the "truth" and I knew it was all lies.
The last time you told me that you love me
I knew you were telling the truth but deep down you regret it because you know you are HIV and you infected me.

Being a good person bleeped me up.
Being someone who's there for everyone bleeped me.
Caring so much for people bleeped me.
Putting myself last got me HIV.
Putting myself last is what killed me.
Loving someone so much that you tolerate everything they got me HIV.

Everything is gone.
All my dreams are gone.
The girl I loved is gone and everything she put me through and I was okay with it.
It's killing me now.

The lady on the radio asked me during an interview.
"If she was alive listening to this what would you say to her"
I would tell her that I was not a fool.
Street...��
.
.
if you like this please comment @Olaiya

[left][/left]

don't forget to share...

THE WAR: I am home and you are not here. Part ll
I have slept amongst the dead bodies.
I smelled nothing but the smell of dead men and
women.
The sound of a machine gun spooks me in my
sleep.
Amongst the dead corpse we lit on fire, I saw the
face of a young boy covered with blood. That
reminded me of my child back home.
“Son, if you can see me now, I am weak and my
tears are pouring down like a rain”
The war leaves nothing behind, it’s like a house
on fire. Everything in it. It takes without
asking.
Why did you have to massacre so many innocence
souls?
Why did you have to leave them
-Homeless
-Fatherless
-And motherless?
When a child cries beside a dead body, my tears
stream down, and no matter many streams I
make, I can never repay the damage or bring
back its mother.
I saw her, looking around. Her tiny hands holding
a doll tight to her chest. Her eyes strong enough
to hold tears but if you look closer you will see
that she cried and her tears are dry on her face.
My heart leaves me in awe.
“Who will take care of them?”
Their dreams are stolen from them
Schools are flat on the ground, no more
education for them
Hospitals are full, no medication, for them
Farms and shops are destroyed, nothing is left,
for them
I am fighting for the world where my child will be
safe, but what about them?
Right there, in the depths of the air polluted with
pain
I wanted to put my gun down, and go home
I wanted to go home so bad. My mind is corrupted
and I can’t get these pictures out of my head.
I think it’s better to see the dead body of a man
next to a gun than a dead body of a child next to
a doll.
We walked the surveillance to where it is safe
and there’s food.
A child ran to me, she looked at me with a sad-
looking face,
“Please don’t leave mommy behind”
I asked her, “Where is she?”
And then she said that “she’s still sleeping there
but she will wake up, please don’t leave her”
She pointed me to a dead body, that was about to
be thrown into a wheelbarrow and into the fire.
I looked at her, she had hopes impregnated in her
eyes
I picked her up and I started walking. Her legs
floated in the air, and we both cried as we
ploughed to safety.
“Why are we fighting? Why can’t we just talk?”
So many times, I asked myself these questions,
what are the politicians doing? Why are they not
here fighting?
We vote for them and our crosses get us nothing
in return.
Brave men die in vain for their countries.
Children are forced to be soldiers
Women are raped and killed.
Politicians sleep on the bed with warm blankets,
while we sleep with pigs.
They make money and buy expensive pieces of
jewellery.
They live long to see their grandchildren.
We live half of our lives to be buried with our
country flags.
Dear president do you know my name?
It was 4 am when they pummelled us in our sleep.
They were invisible, we didn’t know where they
were coming from.
We were protecting the people and at the same
time shooting what we can’t see.
After so many gunshots like a TV game.
The dust settled, the air is throng with
shrieking.
What remained was the dead corpse of men and
women and children and soldiers plunged to the
ground.
I looked for my friend, who I haven’t seen since
nightfall.
There was no sign of him, I thought of the
worse, but accepting that fate, that was not
what I wanted to dwell on.
I searched and when
I found him, he was with wounded limbs and the
nurse then told me that he will never walk again.
I looked at him, lying there on the bed trying to
be strong, he laughed, we laughed and we joked
about it but I knew this is the end.
He was in great pain. But his spirit was
unbreakable
During all the laughter, and jokes. H’s eyes were
getting smaller and smaller.
His voice was getting weaker and weaker
On his left pocket, he took out a letter he had
written
He said he trusts me with it, he told me to give it
to his partner when I get home.
He told me that, no matter the fate of this war,
I must get home to my wife and children and that
letter must get to his partner.
I looked at the letter, with a sharp pain in my
eyes.
“My friend, don’t cry, this war is almost over,
soon you will go home, you will be with your
family,” he said.
“No, we will be with our family, we will get there
and have a cold beer while watching soccer, we
will watch as our children grow old…” the voices
outside indulged
“What’s going on outside? Where does this noise
come from, get your gun ready, maybe they are
back” he tried to get up but in that condition, he
couldn’t do anything.
“Lay back my friend, I will go and investigate, be
strong okay? I will come and get you”
“Don’t worry about me, I will be fine, the pills
the doctor gave me are strong, I feel no pain”
I ran outside the tent, outside everyone was
dancing and cheering
“Does this mean… hey, what’s going on?”
“Didn’t you listen to the radio? The war is over”
A phantom stir, a pounding heart, news I have
always wanted to hear, finally hit my eardrums.
My tears went down and I am happy this is all
over.
I ran back to the tent to tell my friend the good
news.
But…but he had stopped breathing.
His eyes closed and his face is smiling
“Stop joking, please wake up”
Right there I wished death was a joke and he
would wake up and laugh at me.
I wished this was all a prank and he would wake
up and tell me that he just wanted to see my
reaction.
But death is an inevitable guest.
It held him by his hands and walk with him to the
other side.
Even though I knew that he was gone I still
begged him to wake up, but he was smiling and I
was crying, the freedom he spoke of before, he
can’t see it now that his life is over. He was 38
years and he had hope for the future, he gave me
hope in this war. “Sleep well my friend, I will
fulfil your wishes”.
My love, I am sure you heard that the war is
over, today we are flying back home.
My heart is filled with sunshine when I think
about you and our child.
I can’t wait to be with you.
I really miss you.
I am coming home, I am coming to be with you.
It’s been years since I have seen your face. I
can’t wait to see you.
I used to see soldiers coming back from war to
get all the cheering and stand ovation as a young
child.
I know my son will be proud of me when he sees
me.
There is something good waiting and it hurts me
that this helicopter is taking forever.
If it wasn’t for the delay, by now we would have
been with our families.
I have seen these men fight in a battle.
We fought in the rains, the colds and the hot
suns.
Look how delighted their faces are.
Though we went from hell, now everyone looks
happy because it’s all over.
The chopper lends its feet inside the ship.
Down on the harbour, the media in a distance is
flashing their cameras.
The large crowd of people are here to welcome us
home.
Our country flag waves proudly in the air.
I am the son of the soil and this opens my heart.
In the crowd, I know my family is there shrieking
my name.
My son is old now, does he look like me?
In the blink of an eye, the unexpected happened.
Daring men who fought hard in a foreign land
watched as the bomb ingurgitate the faces of
women and children.
The sound of it left us shivering on the ground.
The air shattered with black ashes.
I twitched my eyes more than I can count.
I looked down on the harbour, and my eyes
flunked to give me what is left.
The frost of blood, startled on the dead harbour.
My brain cringed in fear.
Someone screamed “it’s a suicide bomb”
My heart twitched, twitched, I screamed my
lover’s name.
The silent was filled with sirens of firefighters
magnate to the scene.
“What happened?”
I jumped into the ocean, swim with tears bearing
from my eyes.
Legs, shoes and dead faces are all I see as I swim
to the harbour
Blood like mud.
Blood flew like a river.
Bodies shaking like a headless chicken,
Nothing is left only the ghost of our loved ones
I saved people but I couldn’t save my family
All is lost and the house is empty
The nights are full of war memories.
I have no friends.
The pictures of my family smiles while looking at
me.
The frost of nights finds me with a bottle of
whiskey.
What’s more to life, if all you love is no more?
The war is a stalemate, our hearts are no more.
PTSD notches us to our death until we are no
more.
Soon the house will be empty and I will be no
more...

THE WAR: I am home and you are not here. Part ll
I have slept amongst the dead bodies.
I smelled nothing but the smell of dead men and
women.
The sound of a machine gun spooks me in my
sleep.
Amongst the dead corpse we lit on fire, I saw the
face of a young boy covered with blood. That
reminded me of my child back home.
“Son, if you can see me now, I am weak and my
tears are pouring down like a rain”
The war leaves nothing behind, it’s like a house
on fire. Everything in it. It takes without
asking.
Why did you have to massacre so many innocence
souls?
Why did you have to leave them
-Homeless
-Fatherless
-And motherless?
When a child cries beside a dead body, my tears
stream down, and no matter many streams I
make, I can never repay the damage or bring
back its mother.
I saw her, looking around. Her tiny hands holding
a doll tight to her chest. Her eyes strong enough
to hold tears but if you look closer you will see
that she cried and her tears are dry on her face.
My heart leaves me in awe.
“Who will take care of them?”
Their dreams are stolen from them
Schools are flat on the ground, no more
education for them
Hospitals are full, no medication, for them
Farms and shops are destroyed, nothing is left,
for them
I am fighting for the world where my child will be
safe, but what about them?
Right there, in the depths of the air polluted with
pain
I wanted to put my gun down, and go home
I wanted to go home so bad. My mind is corrupted
and I can’t get these pictures out of my head.
I think it’s better to see the dead body of a man
next to a gun than a dead body of a child next to
a doll.
We walked the surveillance to where it is safe
and there’s food.
A child ran to me, she looked at me with a sad-
looking face,
“Please don’t leave mommy behind”
I asked her, “Where is she?”
And then she said that “she’s still sleeping there
but she will wake up, please don’t leave her”
She pointed me to a dead body, that was about to
be thrown into a wheelbarrow and into the fire.
I looked at her, she had hopes impregnated in her
eyes
I picked her up and I started walking. Her legs
floated in the air, and we both cried as we
ploughed to safety.
“Why are we fighting? Why can’t we just talk?”
So many times, I asked myself these questions,
what are the politicians doing? Why are they not
here fighting?
We vote for them and our crosses get us nothing
in return.
Brave men die in vain for their countries.
Children are forced to be soldiers
Women are raped and killed.
Politicians sleep on the bed with warm blankets,
while we sleep with pigs.
They make money and buy expensive pieces of
jewellery.
They live long to see their grandchildren.
We live half of our lives to be buried with our
country flags.
Dear president do you know my name?
It was 4 am when they pummelled us in our sleep.
They were invisible, we didn’t know where they
were coming from.
We were protecting the people and at the same
time shooting what we can’t see.
After so many gunshots like a TV game.
The dust settled, the air is throng with
shrieking.
What remained was the dead corpse of men and
women and children and soldiers plunged to the
ground.
I looked for my friend, who I haven’t seen since
nightfall.
There was no sign of him, I thought of the
worse, but accepting that fate, that was not
what I wanted to dwell on.
I searched and when
I found him, he was with wounded limbs and the
nurse then told me that he will never walk again.
I looked at him, lying there on the bed trying to
be strong, he laughed, we laughed and we joked
about it but I knew this is the end.
He was in great pain. But his spirit was
unbreakable
During all the laughter, and jokes. H’s eyes were
getting smaller and smaller.
His voice was getting weaker and weaker
On his left pocket, he took out a letter he had
written
He said he trusts me with it, he told me to give it
to his partner when I get home.
He told me that, no matter the fate of this war,
I must get home to my wife and children and that
letter must get to his partner.
I looked at the letter, with a sharp pain in my
eyes.
“My friend, don’t cry, this war is almost over,
soon you will go home, you will be with your
family,” he said.
“No, we will be with our family, we will get there
and have a cold beer while watching soccer, we
will watch as our children grow old…” the voices
outside indulged
“What’s going on outside? Where does this noise
come from, get your gun ready, maybe they are
back” he tried to get up but in that condition, he
couldn’t do anything.
“Lay back my friend, I will go and investigate, be
strong okay? I will come and get you”
“Don’t worry about me, I will be fine, the pills
the doctor gave me are strong, I feel no pain”
I ran outside the tent, outside everyone was
dancing and cheering
“Does this mean… hey, what’s going on?”
“Didn’t you listen to the radio? The war is over”
A phantom stir, a pounding heart, news I have
always wanted to hear, finally hit my eardrums.
My tears went down and I am happy this is all
over.
I ran back to the tent to tell my friend the good
news.
But…but he had stopped breathing.
His eyes closed and his face is smiling
“Stop joking, please wake up”
Right there I wished death was a joke and he
would wake up and laugh at me.
I wished this was all a prank and he would wake
up and tell me that he just wanted to see my
reaction.
But death is an inevitable guest.
It held him by his hands and walk with him to the
other side.
Even though I knew that he was gone I still
begged him to wake up, but he was smiling and I
was crying, the freedom he spoke of before, he
can’t see it now that his life is over. He was 38
years and he had hope for the future, he gave me
hope in this war. “Sleep well my friend, I will
fulfil your wishes”.
My love, I am sure you heard that the war is
over, today we are flying back home.
My heart is filled with sunshine when I think
about you and our child.
I can’t wait to be with you.
I really miss you.
I am coming home, I am coming to be with you.
It’s been years since I have seen your face. I
can’t wait to see you.
I used to see soldiers coming back from war to
get all the cheering and stand ovation as a young
child.
I know my son will be proud of me when he sees
me.
There is something good waiting and it hurts me
that this helicopter is taking forever.
If it wasn’t for the delay, by now we would have
been with our families.
I have seen these men fight in a battle.
We fought in the rains, the colds and the hot
suns.
Look how delighted their faces are.
Though we went from hell, now everyone looks
happy because it’s all over.
The chopper lends its feet inside the ship.
Down on the harbour, the media in a distance is
flashing their cameras.
The large crowd of people are here to welcome us
home.
Our country flag waves proudly in the air.
I am the son of the soil and this opens my heart.
In the crowd, I know my family is there shrieking
my name.
My son is old now, does he look like me?
In the blink of an eye, the unexpected happened.
Daring men who fought hard in a foreign land
watched as the bomb ingurgitate the faces of
women and children.
The sound of it left us shivering on the ground.
The air shattered with black ashes.
I twitched my eyes more than I can count.
I looked down on the harbour, and my eyes
flunked to give me what is left.
The frost of blood, startled on the dead harbour.
My brain cringed in fear.
Someone screamed “it’s a suicide bomb”
My heart twitched, twitched, I screamed my
lover’s name.
The silent was filled with sirens of firefighters
magnate to the scene.
“What happened?”
I jumped into the ocean, swim with tears bearing
from my eyes.
Legs, shoes and dead faces are all I see as I swim
to the harbour
Blood like mud.
Blood flew like a river.
Bodies shaking like a headless chicken,
Nothing is left only the ghost of our loved ones
I saved people but I couldn’t save my family
All is lost and the house is empty
The nights are full of war memories.
I have no friends.
The pictures of my family smiles while looking at
me.
The frost of nights finds me with a bottle of
whiskey.
What’s more to life, if all you love is no more?
The war is a stalemate, our hearts are no more.
PTSD notches us to our death until we are no
more.
Soon the house will be empty and I will be no
more...

The War: If I Don’t Make It Home.
Part l
To the end, to the end, they remained.
Into the thick smoke of war,
They fell, they fell, and nothing remained.
Do not cry my dearly beloved,
Be strong and when I am away, take care of our
boy,
Son, when the wind blows away.
When the storm ranges and darkness gets deep.
Remember me, remember my words.
I leave you with your mother, be a man and take
care of things around.
Respect your mother.
Listen to your mother and help her every time she
needs help.
I will be with you guys, whether it's in heaven or
here on earth fighting a war that might leave me
with so many bad memories of my brothers who
fell on my feet.
where I am going, bullets won’t choose who to
take first.
I might be a victim.
So, If I don’t make it home,
I want you guys to know that the fire within my
heart will forever burn for you guys,
You guys are my world, and I will fight to keep
this world at peace for you guys.
They are ready for me now.
I have to go, please be strong.
Remember If I don’t make it home, then it means
I died serving my country.
It means I died, fighting for peace for you guys.
But if I return, I will return to the world that I
know there is peace.
I love you guys.
My love, I will write to you, I will think about you
often.
My son, remember me. On my return, I hope you
will be ready to play soccer with your old man.
Slightly I chuckled while holding back megalithic
drops of tears in my eyes.
A chain of conversation vacant the silent we just
had.
“I know you are leaving, but can you please
promise us that you will come back, please
dearest”
“My love I don’t want to give you false hopes,
but I will try by means to survive for you and our
boy, if there will be peace, I want to see that
peace with you guys"
“I will pray for you every minute of the day,
every minute of the night”
“That’s so kind of you”
“Daddy, please, don’t go”
“I wish I can stay son, but I have to go, promise
me that you will be a good boy”
“Daddy, I don’t want to miss you, if you go now,
when are you going to come back?”
“Please don’t cry my son, I don’t know, but I
promise, as soon as this is all over, I will come
home back, I will come back for you, be strong my
son, and take care of your mother. I hope and
pray this will not be the last time we see each
other"
My footsteps followed me, and just before I get
inside the bus, my son ran to me crying his tears
out.
If I don’t make it home, at least let me take him
back to his mother and say goodbye to them both.
And just like that, tears had south, you give your
last hug to hear their hearts one last time.
You leave your family behind, for you are a
soldier and you must serve,
We scorched the land with our eyes leaning
uncomfortably on the tall trees,
On the ground, there is so much blood,
The trees wave and the smell of a gun power drug
me
The trees wave and I hear the crying of children,
my heart drowns in fear
My legs quake.
I hear the cry of many men who lost their lives
and some left injured
“How many have lost their lives here?”
Corpse butchered and shoes left with streaming
blood
We covered our nose, for the smell was thick
enough to make you puke.
At the peak of the hot sun, finally, we secured
the place and on the bank of the river, we
camped for the night, then I remembered my love,
I remembered my family.
I wondered deeply how my wife and kid back at
home are doing
This time we would be watching movies,
Oh, my humbled little family,
I miss the joy that you too bring in my life,
Oh, the loud noise of my son “this boy, reminds
me late my late brother Joshua” how time flies
when you are happy, just years ago he was just
a little boy crawling on the ground like a lizard
A voice stride slowly to my eardrums.
“Soldier, I see the way you are looking at your
family, you really have to fight to survive and go
be with them, sorry If I disturbed you”
“No, no it’s okay”
“Is that your wife?”
“Yeah, we have been married for three years and
this right here is my son”
“I can tell from the smile that you have on your
face that you really love them, you have to go
back to me, don’t be engulfed by this endgame”
“From the bottom of my heart I do and I have
said my goodbyes to them because I know this
might be the last”
That night, me and Emmanuel we became friends,
we fought side by side,
No matter the brutality of the war, he had hopes
that it will be over and we will soon go home.
He is expecting a baby with a French woman, he
told me how they met,
He can’t wait to see his son.
Emmanuel, gave me hope that I too, can go home
and be with my family
I should stop worrying if I will make it home or
not
Dear my lovely family, I hope things are still
okay, son, I hope you are taking good care of
your mother. I have read the letter you wrote to
me, I really miss you too.
My love, only the sun, only the moon and only the
rain, knows how much I want to be shed under
you, I have felt nothing but the pain of
remembering how much I love you and how much I
miss you
Every night I dream about you, but our dreams
are mixed with the gunshots and enormous loud
noises of bombs. I hate to go sleep, but in my
sleep that's where I spend time with you, I can’t
stop seeing dead people, I hear them, crying,
crying, and crying, I want to sleep, and dance
with you in my dreams, I want this war to stop,
so that I can be with you. Do not miss me oh dear
love, your letters bring you close to me, more
than this war I am happy to know that I can still
smile when I am reading your letters,
please do not wait for me, this war is full of the
ups and downs.
I have kept myself alive with the pictures of you
and our son.
My love, there is something I have to tell you,
yesterday I killed a man,
it was either me or him, here I am writing to
you, to be honest,
I wish the bullet had missed him,
what if someone is waiting for him at home,
what if he had someone who loved him, I don’t
understand this war, why can’t we stop fighting
and talk.
Today
might be the time, we are heading to the core of
the war.
I have lived long for you my love and if this is
the last time, always know that my heart will
burn in fury with love,
I am going now,
I am going, I hope,
I hope I will still be okay when you find this
letter.
If I don't make it home, don't cry for me, I will
always be with you guys...
.
.
……............
Please share, like and comment. After 500 likes, I
will post part ll...

She walked the desert carrying a community in
her womb, she walks the land covered with
thongs, when men said “only the pot know how
hot the fire is” she said I am a woman and I
know how hot the fire is, when men showed their
cowardice she held a blade where it cuts a beast,
I am reminded of this strong woman, not by her
ass whooping, or barbaric baritone as she shouts,
I am reminded by her love, her strong compassion
to humankind, her work ethic like a bee, a strong
mentor like a queen.
She is a woman that means she is a father too,
her home-cooked meal gives you Goosebumps and
they hit you differently more than any meal could
ever do. She makes sure that there is bread on
the table even when times are hard. She sings
the lullaby to the children, even big brothers and
sisters, sleep when they hear it sprue through
the dark of the night. Time has a limited edition,
by the scars tattooed on her body, I am reminded
of what it means to be a woman, being a woman
comes with consequences, you are born with a
trigger on your head, your might will be tasted
through space and time. Your immense spirit will
be taken for granted but you are a woman that
means you are an ant and you can kill an
elephant
Your conscious grow a farm, your elegant heart
reminds us that beauty is not about how you
look.
You have sung through the wounds to strengthen
the weak, you empower minds of many that looms
behind you,
Yes, you are a woman, a mother and a father at
the same time, the one who stayed home and
takes care of the children, the one who wears
heels the whole day and cooks when she gets
home, the one who can be on the phone, while
holding a spoon, the baby is crying and you have
to attend it.
Yes, you are a woman, you danced around the
fire,
You blew the smoke to ignite the fire, you walked
the mountains high and low
Yes, you are a woman, without you, there is no
life.
This strong woman is my mother
She is my father
She is my brother
She is my sister
She is my friend
Remember the shape of baobab tree when you
think of the heart of a woman. Remember a stone
when you ask “how strong is a woman”
Happy Mother's Day...

Four years in college: graduation year

Four years in college, we all didn’t think we would be here
Just three years ago we all got here and didn’t know what to
expect
Four years in college, we all faced trials and tribulations
Along the way, we lost so many great souls,
We’ve had so many sleepless nights,
We faced depression more than we faced our exam papers
So many wanted to give up, but we kept our shoulders high
and we pushed
Four years in college and now we are here.
There were nights, we cried because we couldn’t take it
anymore
There were days things didn’t work out
We’ve had so many close calls but somehow it wasn’t our time
There were days when prayer was not enough,
Lecturers were hard to convince
So many of us slept with an empty stomach
Not because we didn’t have food but we didn’t have time
When you are here all by yourself, your number one goal is to
not disappoint your parents.
There times you had to decide if whether you should be in
this relationship or not
There were times you thought you should call home and tell
them that you want to come
There were nights you said you are okay, even when you knew
deep down that you weren’t.
You just didn’t want to bother anyone
There were Saturday nights, your blood would just crave to
be out there and party
But Exams were coming like coaches of a train
Assignments were piled up in your room and you couldn’t
breath
Class of 2020, thank you, you made it, you finally got the
graduation gown
You got that paper you have always wanted
My name is Siphokazi from a little village in Kwa Zulu Natal
Like everyone else, I made it,
I should be celebrating,
I should be popping a champagne
I too should be wiping my mother tears with my graduation
gown
Only if that phew would mean that finally it’s done
As long as you are alive, God is not done with you
Four years in college, my mother worked hard so that I can
go to school like everyone else
She paid my fees with the little that she had
She made sure that I came back home with a graduation
gown
“Hey mom, it’s done”
We danced like headless chickens,
But celebrations in this family don’t last
Four years in college, my mother’s money went down the
drain
Nothing about this college was real
Fake lecturers
Fake certificates
Fake Security Company
Nothing is registered
Why me and my family?
Why? when we thought that now things will be fine because I
finally got the papers?
Stupid, stupid
What to do next?
My mother is saying she’s okay but she’s not
She’s trying to be strong but we’re all weak
He is gone
He took our money and left
200 students all left with nothing but depression
How do you feel when you open a college when deep down you
knew that it’s fake?
Why would you do something so evil to us?
How do you sleep, when you know that 200 students will have
to start from stretch to obtain a certificate again?
Do you know what our parents went through to pay you every
month so that we can get in class?
You would tell us that if we hadn’t had money by Monday
We shouldn’t come into your building
You left us with nothing but
Depression
Frustration
Four years in college
I didn’t know that I will wait for another year to make my
mother proud...

Carol is missing.

Last night she didn't make it home
We called her phone several times but no one answered
Her mother was worried
We were all worried
We called her friends but they all said that she went home
We called the last person who might know where she is but still, he said Carol packed the bag and went home
She didn't come home last night
It's been two nights and half a day,
No one has seen her or heard from her
The police opened a case of a missing person
She is been missing for a week
Her pictures are all over social media.
On the radio, they are talking about her
On the news they asking everyone to help find her
Carol is missing and this is not a poem
Carol is missing and this is serious.
Carol your son cries every day and night
We miss you and we are wondering if you are okay
Its been weeks now
If you see this post please come home
Come home to your son
Come home to your mother
Come home, your friends are missing you
I play your favourite song just to convince myself that you are alive
The only connection I have with you, are your smiling pictures
I hold them close to my heart with tears rolling out of my tears
Sis, Come back, please
Come back home
I have cried my self to sleep
I am trying to be okay but I can't be okay without knowing where you are
We trying everything we can
But day in and out I feel like we are failing
I feel like I am losing you
You son's song
"I want mommy,
I want mommy"
Breaks me every day and night
We don't know what to say to him anymore
Your boyfriend comforts him
But he always has things to do
The day you were declared "missing"
Mother fought a great deal with him
She thinks he knows where you are
The police went to his place
They searched it but there was no sign of you
We don't know where you are and it breaks me
Mother cries overnight
She can't be strong anymore
She can't take it anymore
My tears evaporated
My eyes pooped out
My body got cold
9am in the morning
The police found your body
It was wrapped inside a government plastic
It was found by trash pickers
They found the plastic along the road
Its been weeks
And the smell opened the roof
Who did this to you?
How did you body fit inside a plastic?
Who wants to know what happened next?...

The War: Her Voice
Part 3
We can lay on the bed one last time
We can laugh again and forget all the problems of this world
I smile by just thinking about you
I can get weak by just resting my lips on yours
I can melt by just hearing your voice
I can sleep on your chest and all the moon is mine
And all pots forget how hot the fire is
The coals burn and the sun ignites
The wind rustles and the days get blown away
A cup of coffee was always on the table waiting for you to return
A pregnant woman was always on the window listening to war broadcast with tears matching out of her eyes hoping for you to return
Dear my love
It is me, your first love
Your high school sweetheart
Let me first apologize for not telling you that I am pregnant
No! Let me first apologize for not telling you that we are pregnant,
You would always say “it’s we, not I, even when you are pregnant it is we, not I” so yeah we are pregnant.
Please forgive me for not telling you that we are pregnant, I am sorry.
My love the baby is a boy and the greatest gift I think I ever gave my in-laws, was to name him after you
It brought them to tears
My eyes know the pain I cried out that day
He is four years now, everything about him remains me of you
The way he laughs,
How loud he is
Sometimes I feel like crying by just looking at him
Oh before I forget
He is also a bad dancer like you, but I will never tell me him because I hope one day he will be better than you,
My love, I have lived my life with nothing but pain
Nothing was the same ever since you left
I tried to put a smile on but everything was ironic
Your letters gave me a life I lost when you left.
Reading your letters brought you closer to me
I would close my eyes and see you in your uniform
God knows that I was praying for you to return home
I had hopes that one day you would return
I wanted you to be with me inside the maternity ward
I wanted you to be the first one to meet the photocopy of you
We argued a lot about who our child will look like, I have always told you
“You are the dominant one” I wish you can see him.
My love, are you coming?
“Knock, knock”
“Whose there?”
I was in the kitchen preparing food for ma and pa
“I said who's there”
“Daughter just open, my son is a soldier and if something happens he will shoot them,” said pa
I chuckled and I opened the door
Two soldiers with dejected faces standing on the door
I knew it was about you
They had uniform folded nicely in their hands
I didn’t cry when they shook their heads
I didn’t scream when they told me that you are no more
I smiled in a simple way
I touched my tummy and I told it that everything will be okay
I laughed in a nice way
I called ma and pa
Ma broke down and cried
Lovers pick each other up, pa picked Ma up and wiped her eyes
If I broke down who was going to pick me up?
If I cried who was going to wipe my tears?
They gave me your uniform and left
Everything was normal for me
News travels fast and everyone was there to pay their respect
I didn’t cry for you
I didn’t cry for you
Early in the morning
On the window like a flower pot
I waited for you
Your cup of coffee was on the table waiting for you to return
A pregnant woman waiting on the window like a curtain
“Daughter, what are you doing on the window?”
“I am waiting for my husband to return home”
“What? No don’t do this to yourself, he is no more, please come sit with us”
Father always told jokes, I laughed and I told him that you are coming
On that window, with my hands resting on my stomach
I waited
And waited
And waited
And waited
I ate from that window
I slept on that window
I was losing my mind
Until one morning I cried out so loud
Because I was waiting for you and you were not coming back
I was waiting for you and tomorrow we were taking your ashes to the grave
I loved a man, not a cup full of ashes
We were made from soil,
When I was holding that cup I wished to be God and make you again.
Now that you are gone and I am wishing that you were here in this ward to see your first child
Now that you are gone, I look at your son and I see a man I have loved with all that I have
I see a man I love and still hope that one you will come home
Judgement day, they are saying everything will be okay
I hope to see you again.
My love, I have done you wrong
I have slept with a man because I was trying to forget about you
Pa and ma told me to move on with my life
But every move I make
I still see your smile
I still hear your laughter
I find myself in broke relationships
I can’t keep a relationship because the man I ever loved showed me how to be loved
I tried to move on but my heart is still yours
I am writing to you today
Because another man broke my heart
But that is not why I write to you
My love, your son doesn’t sleep anymore
Every night he wakes up in a fury of a nightmare
He tells me about a man who calls him, son
My love, you are not forgotten
You are always at the back of our minds
Today we are going to ask for your spirit to rest in perfect peace
I want you to rest my love
I want you to stop worrying about us because we are okay
The war is over and we are safe
You are the pride of our nation
Dear God, please accept your child
For all that he sinned, we pray you to forgive him.
My love
I know one day we will meet again
Maybe we will dance again
Maybe we will laugh like hyenas again
When we meet, I can’t wait to hear all the war stories you have for me
We will be three this time
Me
You
And our son
We will be magic
I can’t wait for that day to come
Because maybe you can kiss my lips again and all the worries in my head will faint.

The War: Her Voice
Part 3
We can lay on the bed one last time
We can laugh again and forget all the problems of this world
I smile by just thinking about you
I can get weak by just resting my lips on yours
I can melt by just hearing your voice
I can sleep on your chest and all the moon is mine
And all pots forget how hot the fire is
The coals burn and the sun ignites
The wind rustles and the days get blown away
A cup of coffee was always on the table waiting for you to return
A pregnant woman was always on the window listening to war broadcast with tears matching out of her eyes hoping for you to return
Dear my love
It is me, your first love
Your high school sweetheart
Let me first apologize for not telling you that I am pregnant
No! Let me first apologize for not telling you that we are pregnant,
You would always say “it’s we, not I, even when you are pregnant it is we, not I” so yeah we are pregnant.
Please forgive me for not telling you that we are pregnant, I am sorry.
My love the baby is a boy and the greatest gift I think I ever gave my in-laws, was to name him after you
It brought them to tears
My eyes know the pain I cried out that day
He is four years now, everything about him remains me of you
The way he laughs,
How loud he is
Sometimes I feel like crying by just looking at him
Oh before I forget
He is also a bad dancer like you, but I will never tell me him because I hope one day he will be better than you,
My love, I have lived my life with nothing but pain
Nothing was the same ever since you left
I tried to put a smile on but everything was ironic
Your letters gave me a life I lost when you left.
Reading your letters brought you closer to me
I would close my eyes and see you in your uniform
God knows that I was praying for you to return home
I had hopes that one day you would return
I wanted you to be with me inside the maternity ward
I wanted you to be the first one to meet the photocopy of you
We argued a lot about who our child will look like, I have always told you
“You are the dominant one” I wish you can see him.
My love, are you coming?
“Knock, knock”
“Whose there?”
I was in the kitchen preparing food for ma and pa
“I said who's there”
“Daughter just open, my son is a soldier and if something happens he will shoot them,” said pa
I chuckled and I opened the door
Two soldiers with dejected faces standing on the door
I knew it was about you
They had uniform folded nicely in their hands
I didn’t cry when they shook their heads
I didn’t scream when they told me that you are no more
I smiled in a simple way
I touched my tummy and I told it that everything will be okay
I laughed in a nice way
I called ma and pa
Ma broke down and cried
Lovers pick each other up, pa picked Ma up and wiped her eyes
If I broke down who was going to pick me up?
If I cried who was going to wipe my tears?
They gave me your uniform and left
Everything was normal for me
News travels fast and everyone was there to pay their respect
I didn’t cry for you
I didn’t cry for you
Early in the morning
On the window like a flower pot
I waited for you
Your cup of coffee was on the table waiting for you to return
A pregnant woman waiting on the window like a curtain
“Daughter, what are you doing on the window?”
“I am waiting for my husband to return home”
“What? No don’t do this to yourself, he is no more, please come sit with us”
Father always told jokes, I laughed and I told him that you are coming
On that window, with my hands resting on my stomach
I waited
And waited
And waited
And waited
I ate from that window
I slept on that window
I was losing my mind
Until one morning I cried out so loud
Because I was waiting for you and you were not coming back
I was waiting for you and tomorrow we were taking your ashes to the grave
I loved a man, not a cup full of ashes
We were made from soil,
When I was holding that cup I wished to be God and make you again.
Now that you are gone and I am wishing that you were here in this ward to see your first child
Now that you are gone, I look at your son and I see a man I have loved with all that I have
I see a man I love and still hope that one you will come home
Judgement day, they are saying everything will be okay
I hope to see you again.
My love, I have done you wrong
I have slept with a man because I was trying to forget about you
Pa and ma told me to move on with my life
But every move I make
I still see your smile
I still hear your laughter
I find myself in broke relationships
I can’t keep a relationship because the man I ever loved showed me how to be loved
I tried to move on but my heart is still yours
I am writing to you today
Because another man broke my heart
But that is not why I write to you
My love, your son doesn’t sleep anymore
Every night he wakes up in a fury of a nightmare
He tells me about a man who calls him, son
My love, you are not forgotten
You are always at the back of our minds
Today we are going to ask for your spirit to rest in perfect peace
I want you to rest my love
I want you to stop worrying about us because we are okay
The war is over and we are safe
You are the pride of our nation
Dear God, please accept your child
For all that he sinned, we pray you to forgive him.
My love
I know one day we will meet again
Maybe we will dance again
Maybe we will laugh like hyenas again
When we meet, I can’t wait to hear all the war stories you have for me
We will be three this time
Me
You
And our son
We will be magic
I can’t wait for that day to come
Because maybe you can kiss my lips again and all the worries in my head will faint.

The War: homecoming
Part 2
I got out of the plane
I looked around the crowd for you
But your face was not there
Large sets of noises, but yours was not there to welcome me home
Like a sniper, I focused my lens on every face but no matter how focused I was, your face was still not there
Where are you?
“We are the heroes of our country now
For months we fought.
We fought hard for our nation
Many of our brothers went to the soil, they are not to be forgotten
Lieutenant Jerry, who showed a great character in the war zone
Luanda Omache, who stood tall for our anthem
Today we celebrate their lives
Today we stand tall as the heroes of our own nation
Soldiers we are proud of you, you showed us that with you by our sides, our woman and children are safe…”
The speech was so long,
I was sitting there as a proud soldier but I was missing my love
Friends were sitting with their spouse
I kept on looking around hoping to see her come running to me
But nothing like that happened
My neck was even getting tired
In my mind
I played how I wanted things to be like
She would come running in her white dress
She will jump on me and I will lift her up in the sky
“Oh my injured arm, but I will manage”
“Soldier, are you talking alone?”
“No, I am not”
“Come on we are home now, there is nothing to worry about, and the war is over, look around no bullets are flying”
“I know man, I know, I just have a lot in my head”
“Don’t worry, your wife will take all that’s in your head away, by the way, where is she? I didn’t see her around”
“You know woman, they like surprises, maybe there is something big waiting for me at home”
“If I was you I was going to get out of here and go be with her, surprises don’t last long, go home and be with your wife”
“Thanks, man”
I got out of the table, I took one last glass of wine and head home
My palm was sweating
My heart was pounding
“I can do this, I can do this”
“Hey Soldier, you go home empty-handed? Come get some roses for your mate
“I don’t have money sir”
“You fought for me, at least let me do something for you, take as many as you want, I know how it feels to be away from home for so long”
I picked up some roses,
Roses that took me back to our wedding day
The day she made me a man in front of everyone
The day she made me feel like this world only belongs to her and me
My palm was sweating and my heart was racing like a train
My anxiety took me back to the days I first saw her
A bright beautiful young woman
Who was rude and didn’t want to hear anything from me
Day in and out, I followed her like her shadows
My eyes would just sweat when she ignores me
I loved her before I can even kiss her
I loved her before I can even tell her that I love her
I loved her, even more, the day I told her that I want to grow old with her
There was a large silent in my yard
Expectations were high like a boy who just smoked weed for the first time
I took a glim at the windows hoping to see a curtain moving
There was no movement
I walked to the door
I held a doorknob, the adrenaline of what I was expecting inside was highly devotional
“What the”
The door was open
I still have my smile on
I closed my eyes and I slowly pushed the door
In my mind
“Surprise! was so loud”
I closed my eyes with a smile
Empty, empty, empty
No one was in front of me
“My love where are you?”
Roses on the floor
“Oh I see now”
A panty on the floor
Roses lighting up a road to our bedroom
“This will be nice”
I walked between the trails of roses
“What a romantic wife I have”
Going upstairs, my feelings were getting high
I still have a smile on my face,
My lips were stuck between my teeth
My heart racing
And my palm sweating
I slowly opened the door
I heard her laughing
She laughed again
A smile on my face said stop what you are doing
It was all written on a book with a pencil
I opened the door and I erased all the smile I had on my face
A smile said bring me back again
And I dropped my jaws and my eyes flow out of my skull
I had my ring on
She had her ring on the headboard
I kept my promise but here she is looking into another man’s eyes
Her smile said I enjoyed it
The way she kissed him
Said I want you here by my side
He said: My love I think I should go now, the kids will come back soon
My voice said scream
My mouth said let’s do it
“Angela, what are you doing?”
“It was really nice to have you here over the weekend”
I angrily walked to them
My fist said, punch him
My nerves said let’s do it
And then my fist went through him
I hit him again
It went through him again
I looked at my hand
I was still me
I throw a punch again, it went through him
I called out
“Lola, Lola”
Her head went deep in his chest
“Are you ignoring me?”
“I think you should go and visit your late husband’s grave, I think your son should say a thing or two to his father”
“You are right, it’s been four years now, I think he also deserves to know that he has a son”
“What are they talking about? Can they see or hear me? What’s going on here?”
“Lola, we are home, oh not again…”
“Or they are back”
I went downstairs, “thank God, Catherine, Catherine, can you see me, can you hear me”
“Jacob, don’t worry I won’t tell mommy about what you did okay?”
I looked at the young gentleman and I saw a picture of my childhood
His eyes
His forehead
His nose
He is me
“Catherine, is this my child? please talk to me, Catherine”
No one can hear me
No one can see me
I don’t know why this doesn’t make sense
That night I slept on the couch
I still didn’t understand what was going on
They drove to the graveyard
Born 1973
Died 2019
Name: Lieutenant Jacob Tulu
Died serving his beloved country
May his soul rest in peace
Catherine: Jacob here lays your brave father, a man who fought for his country, I named you after him, say something to him,
Jacob Jr: hello daddy, when are you coming home?
Right behind him, I wish I was loud enough so that he can hear me saying “I am home”
But no one can see me
No one can hear me
I died
But I see my child running around
I died and I see my wife kissing another man
I died, God why am I still here?
The speech was so long, I have missed the part where they mentioned my name.

The war: come home for me
Part 1
“I will wait for you,
I will be here waiting for you
When you are out there fighting for our country, I want you to always know that there is someone waiting for you back at home,
Please promise me that you will be back”
We shared tears on each other’s shoulders
I wanted to tell her that I am scared
But my words were silent.
We kiss with our body, deep in the pool of our tears
“I will be back, I will be back my love, please don’t cry”
“My love what if this is the last time?”
“Please have faith, remember 1 Corinthians 16:13:”
It was hard for her
It was even harder for me too,
She gave me a couple of our pictures
I put them in my bag
I looked at her with a smile that says
“Even if I don’t make it, I want you to know that I love you”
Outside the cheering were so loud, “it must be a pickup bus”
Her eyes melted,
I looked at her and smiled
“I promise I will be back”
I walked out of the door
The sky was full of dust,
The street was full of crowd
Our country flag was waving in the dusty sky
Hope chased away my fear
I felt brave when I saw the smiles of young and old when they looked at me
“This is for them, this is for them”
In a large crowd, her face was so bright,
It was like it’s her alone
When the bus started to move, in a blink of an eye she was on the window
With me
“I love you, please don’t leave me, John, don’t leave me, please don’t leave”
“I will be back for you, please remember 1 Corinthians 16:13, I will always have you in my mind, I will always think about you, I will write to you every day and every night, I love you, and I will come back home for you”
Her hand was tight on the window, she didn’t want to let go
She couldn’t stop crying.
They took her off the window
She fought her way out and she began running after the bus
But the bus was too quick and she couldn’t catch up with it
I watched on the window
She stood there crying and crying
Until she went on the ground
“Mate, you have to become back for that woman, she loves you”
I have to be strong,
I have to come back for her
I will come back for her.
Cold far away from home
Day and night I crave your presence
I dream about you every night
Being away from you feels like my blessings are scattered in these dead bodies
I am lonely in the heart of the cold war
I miss you,
I miss your smile,
I miss your laughter
My love I am writing to you tonight
It’s been nine weeks since I left home
Sorry I couldn’t write for the past two
The war is not yet over,
Day in and out,
Our men are taking out in large numbers
I am trying, by all means, to survive for you
I can’t wait for this war to end so that I can be home with you
You gave me the meaning of life
You taught me humanity
You taught me to be myself
Being away from you made me realise how much I love you and I will forever want to lay next to you
The day is coming where I will wake up next to you
Your pictures give me hope in this hopeless place
There is a lot I want to share with you
But all the stories mean nothing compared to sharing my love with you
I love you
And I will write to you again.
It’s been nineteen weeks and three days
I smell nothing but the blood of another human being
Lately, I have missed the sound of my heartbeat
I don’t know if I am alive or not,
Influenza is bringing me down
I lay cold, in our mobile clinic
I am worried if I will make it out of this war zone
My love, I am losing hope,
Half of our men are dead
There is no love in this war
So many suicide bombs
Children are turned into repels
We have no choice but to kill them
I lost my friend,
He was shot by a fifteen-year-old “man”
Everyone is an enemy
It’s a kill or be killed
Sorry to bore you with all the war stories
My love are you okay?
I haven’t received any letter from you,
It’s been a month now,
Are you okay?
I wish to hear from you
Your pictures are still smiling at me
I still hear your laughter in my head
Though I smell of blood
But when I close my eyes
I see you
Your essence is giving me hope
I might be discharged soon
They need me at the field
I will be with you soon
I don’t know when
But I will be with you soon
Please write back to me
I wish to hear from you.
The wonders of how she is doing have been bugging me
She used to write back
But the train of letters have stopped
I take out her picture and I talk with it
“My love, what’s going on? Why are not writing to me back?”
She promised to write back
But she has stopped
Love never felt so weak
What’s going on?
They are telling me that
Maybe you have a man
But you have a ring on your finger and you can’t do that
She vowed in front of God
I know God is protecting her
He is protecting me here
I am not yet dead but I feel empty inside.
One morning we woke up
The war has finally ended
My I have bullet holes on my body
But a soldier never dies
I can’t wait to see my love
I can’t wait to finally wake up next to her
I can’t wait
I can’t wait...

Oyinprince:
Is anyone reading this story here?

Yes very very interesting [b][/b]