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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? (5888 Views)
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Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Magnoliaa(f): 3:25pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Acidosis: Aha! Now you want to know the most important thing, which is the outcome. Next would be to say decisions aren't permanent and no one knows what the future will hold for their families and kids. I'm glad you admitted, though, that you can only glimpse from comments online. So assumptions such as, "oh you guys do and don't do such offline" don't cut it here. Let's leave it at that. 2 Likes |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Ishilove: 3:30pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by cococandy(f): 3:46pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Acidosis: If it won’t encourage you to get it, then what’s the point of me telling you? Yes I won’t disclose someone else’s personal health information. Let me know whenever you see me doing that and I’ll stand corrected. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by GloriousGbola: 3:50pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
cococandy: Coco has been in obodo oyibo too long. Na for staff bus hr dey broadcast pipu matter for naija. Ethics, what ethics? Code of wetin? |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by cococandy(f): 3:55pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Acidosis: There’s no disadvantage to condoms or abstinence. Abstinence remains the 100% method of birth control. But it’s unrealistic to depend on it. We can and should encourage it for people who want no risk at all. But we also know that human nature will win at some point that’s where other methods of birth control come in. I have nothing against abstinence as a choice. Vasectomy as a birth control method cannot also be for everyone. I’m not saying all men out there need to go and get a vasectomy. But we aren’t even having the conversation for those who are eligible. If we must prevent unwanted pregnancies, all forms of birth control have to be accessible and that includes vasectomy. Many men who could have gotten it don’t even know it’s an option or know what it’s all about. That’s why the conversation needs to be had. Talking about it doesn’t mean all men of reproductive age will get it. Nor do I think it’s realistic for all men to get it. Like why is it 2 million naira? Why don’t many men know about it? Why are the ones who have heard of it misinformed and afraid? All these questions can be answered by education and research. Only conversation that sparks such moves. Yes we are not there now but we’ll get there. 4 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by cococandy(f): 3:57pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
GloriousGbola:Lol. I would lose my license expeditiously. I play too much but I don’t play that type of play |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Magnoliaa(f): 4:29pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
@Acidosis, here's what you said: The only problem here is that many of you won't start this sermon in your households, with your sons and brothers. And here's Coco response: This sermon gets preached in my household. And, me, what I'm saying is not limited to the scope of the vasectomy conversation. People ASSUME liberal-leaning women aren't always true to what they say or believe in. I'm addressing that generally. You can make conclusions based on our comments all you want, I'm telling you that you have nothing conclusive to say that we don't have the conversationS we have online, with our sons and brothers. Or in other words, we don't practice what we preach. And I told you about me. Here's Amazon's response:
And then let's not even get started on the number of such women who embody what they preach, hence my asking you how many of such women you know. It's a different thing entirely to claim 'they don't have such conversations with their families or partners' and another thing to ask 'what's the outcome of such conversation?' Which wan are you saying? We do abi we no dey do (am for real life)? Coco is just one person, and can choose not to tell you her personal details. It doesn't mean there aren't others who have had that conversation and their husbands have agreed to the procedure. Of course, it's something unconventional especially in this part of the world. So if you find such a couple, not readily, I'm sure you'll still have more poking questions for them on that decision. That's for your notion on vasectomy. In addition to that, there are other ideas people have concerning feminist women when it comes to relationships, marriage, children, domestic duties, respect and cooperation, etc. And the idea is that we don't put our money where our mouth is as you've said here. That is what I'm calling untrue. Because if I bring you a feminist that can cook, cook or can't, don't cook - people will find a way to turn it against her and as a plus for patriarchy. If I also bring you a feminist that respects her husband, same thing. If I literally bring you thousands of feminist women doing what they preach, contrary to your belief, you'll still find a way to question them...you'll never accept there are... or they are. 3 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Magnoliaa(f): 4:41pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Acidosis: Ohooo. So you're not asking because you want to be convinced, with proof or anything. Sha, you've know now. We do hold sermons and crusades in our homes. We're not just making mouth here. I'm sure if you get a positive and explanatory response... you go switch to another tone. Abi? 1 Like |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Magnoliaa(f): 5:06pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
AmazonTopaz: Comrade. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Acidosis(m): 5:58pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
cococandy: Vasectomy is not a disease, is it? Not willing to disclose it makes it even scary. |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Acidosis(m): 6:09pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
cococandy: Well, for those who think that vasectomy is the same as castration, the conversation may be necessary for the sake of education and enlightenment and nothing more. In the course of enlightening men, let's not also forget to mention the possible risks. |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by cococandy(f): 6:15pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Acidosis: No it’s not a disease. But it’s a personal medical decision. so if someone makes it and discloses it to me, it’s not my place to be discussing it with other people who they didn’t consent to reveal that information to. 1 Like |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by cococandy(f): 6:20pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Phew thank you. They just chose not to believe us so it doesn’t even matter what one says. If I say I would encourage my man or the men around me to get a vasectomy, then it would be a bad thing. If I say I wouldn’t , they’ll say I’m not practicing what I preach. So what am I supposed to do? It’s a personal decision. So let’s leave it at that. Magnoliaa: 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Acidosis(m): 6:39pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Magnoliaa: I'm simply saying that many do not tell us about their real life and relatable experiences. For example, people only assume that some ladies here are feminists based on the nature of posts we read from them. If you're one, why don't you wear the tag boldly rather than simply "defending feminism"? Why defend what we are not? You see, this is the issue I have with Coco at some point. You expend energy defending ga.ys and bisexuals even though you're "straight" and married to the opposite sex. Why do you spend so much time defending what you're not, when you should ideally preach what you do and what works for you? If women do not tell us what they practice, then we can only assume that the things you fight for are mere illusions. Since women seem to know more about what's best for the male reproductive organ, then women should be able to start the conversation in their close circle and also be willing to give us their experiences and feedback. That's the only way to reveal the motives behind such conversations. Some people believe I hold strong opinions about marriage/family. Well, they are not just opinions. My comments about marriage or family are things I have done, things I intend to do, or things I would do if found in a similar situation. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by cococandy(f): 7:33pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Acidosis: About this, it’s about compassion and empathy. You can defend a marginalized group without being one of them. A man can defend women’s right. A white person can defend POC rights. A straight person can defend gay rights. In fact when people from the oppressor group refuse to speak up for the oppressed group, the oppressed group will never get equity and equality. So I don’t have to be LGBTQ to agree that they deserve same considerations as straight people. 8 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by GloriousGbola: 7:37pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Acidosis: wow.wow.wow. if people thought like this - blacks would still be slaves. if people thought like this, the civil rights movement would have died this thinking is very close to racism and tribalism. why should i be bothered about the rights of people who do not share the same race, tribe, lifestyle, creed, religion etc as myself? 2 Likes |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by GloriousGbola: 7:38pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
cococandy: 1 Like |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Acidosis(m): 8:00pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
cococandy: There's a fine line between defending the rights of a marginalized group and split personality issues. In trying to defend a marginalized tribe in Nigeria, I won't lose my identity. And it's always very easy to come up with one's idea of the marginalized. It's always women, ga.ys, you've even added Muslims lately and oh Ukraine When men defend men's rights, they're upholding patriarchy. It's easy to say one group is marginalized while the other isn't. |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Acidosis(m): 8:08pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
GloriousGbola: It's very easy to form an opinion of who's marginalized and who's not. |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by folake4u(f): 8:26pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
pocohantas: Guilty as charged! By the way, if you're holding it in Abuja, biko I'd love to volunteer oh. |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Magnoliaa(f): 8:27pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
cococandy: Ahhhh. Biko, thank you, wo. Thank you so much see. I would think these things are pretty easy to see o. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Magnoliaa(f): 8:30pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Acidosis: Rightttttt. So that's your idea ba? It's all based on opinions ehn? There's no iota of truth in what Coco and the other guy are saying? It's easy to form opinions about things...? 2 Likes |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by cococandy(f): 8:38pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
I see you tried to summarize what you think you know about me in this brief post and it couldn’t be further from the truth because you don’t in fact know anything about me. I know I’m not about to convert to Islam or marry a woman or change my physical gender presentation. So where’s the split personality and loss of identity you speak about? You don’t even know me in person so how would you know what my identity is like? Ukraine and Muslims? Acidosis don’t make me laugh please. Islam is one of the most oppressive religions on earth. On par with Christians. When I tell Christians to own up to their oppressive ideas, it doesn’t mean I consider Muslims an oppressed group. Two things can be true at the same time. And you don’t even know my opinion on the Ukraine issue. I’ve mostly been silent about it. Don’t make assumptions please Anyway my identity doesn’t depend on depriving others their right to free existence. I guess that’s the difference between you and I. I don’t need to subscribe to any of that in order to show folks what my identity is. I’m not confused about who I am or what I like. Therefore, seeing someone living their life the way they want to will not make me uncomfortable. I’m not going to be influenced to change from what I like into what they like. I don’t how speaking for them will change my identity in that aspect. I don’t know where you get off to thinking that if you don’t agree with oppressing those that are different from you, then you’re not being true to your real identity. Ask yourself why you think that. Who are you trying to SHOW that you are true to whatever beliefs you share. Because I know people who don’t necessarily support bigotry but won’t say anything against it because they don’t want their community and brethren to see them as different. Acidosis: 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by cococandy(f): 8:39pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Acidosis: These aren’t opinions. Oppression can be measured in numbers, policies, etc |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by cococandy(f): 8:40pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Magnoliaa: Don’t mind acid 1 Like |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Magnoliaa(f): 8:42pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
cococandy: I had to highlight this part. 'Cause this is what it is all seeming like to me. 2 Likes |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by pocohantas(f): 8:42pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
folake4u: Till date? Lol, maybe I can give you a mini lecture in the DM. Not in Abj either. |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by cococandy(f): 8:47pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Magnoliaa: Yes he’s making an assumption based on me calling Putin a Hemotional Megalomaniac in one post like that and now I guess I’m on Ukraine’s side of the war . That’s literally the only strong opinion I’ve shared about that issue. Ukrainians are racist and Putin will have black people in chains out in the fields working until our skins peel off if he could. I have no investment in their conflict 1 Like |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by folake4u(f): 8:47pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
pocohantas: Lol yes oh , lemme go to DM now. Awwn okay, what city then? |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Acidosis(m): 8:50pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Magnoliaa: Don't finish me with laugh abeg. Anyway, we all are entitled to our opinions. |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by pocohantas(f): 8:54pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
folake4u: Osun state… |
Re: Is It proper For Married Woman To Do Abortion? by Magnoliaa(f): 8:59pm On Mar 07, 2022 |
Acidosis: Many? First off how many do you know, Acid? And how many do you know that do not share? Especially offline? What makes you so certain some of us are hypocrites? This is not about them sharing relatable experiences anymore, Acid. Because even when they told you that they preach what you said they don't in their homes, you went silent. Look you aren't entitled to anyone's personal stories yet, but that still doesn't give you the right to go about labeling people 'fake'. Nairaland is an anonymous forum where privacy is the first value here. If you want feminists women sharing their true lives stories and making equality-backed decisions, go to Twitter and Facebook where they share them with their real identities. Go onto YouTube to watch feminist videos. Listen to podcasts. But after doing ALL these, would be still believe everything you'll read and hear to be TRUE? Would you? Again Acid, you're conflating points. People sharing or not sharing from their personal experiences does not mean they cannot speak on other issues that do not apply to them directly. And the fact that they DON'T SAY doesn't mean they DON'T DO. Yes, that was your initial point. What you were saying is that they don't practice what they preach, or they don't preach online sermons in their homes, now you're saying they don't share from their real lives experiences. How many do you know to reach that conclusion? Is it only on LGBT+ Coco speaks on? How are you certain any other thing she speaks on aren't true for her, when you know nothing about her (or don't even know her offline)? 3 Likes 2 Shares |
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