boxypane:
It's quite unfortunate that it has gotten to this level, I think she also needs to remind him of who he was before this. A little tick could do the trick.

She has her hands busy as it is, yet you want her to, while he lies around lazily all day, take time to remind him of who he used to be before this, assuming he was any better?

Kobojunkie:
She has her hands busy as it is, yet you want her to, while he lies around lazily all day, take time to remind him of who he used to be before this, assuming he was any better?

Hmm... Im sure she didn't marry a gambler. What was it like before the set back began?

boxypane:
Hmm... Im sure she didn't marry a gambler. What was it like before the set back began?

How do you know he wasn't already gambling before he met and even married her?

All4zionlover

Before he lost his job, he was contributing to the family ??
Before he lost his job you never contemplated on divorcing him ??

Did you marry him cos of his job ??

Did you marry him because you felt he could provide for his family ??


Look with what i read, oga is battling serious depression.. he might be having a break down.
Men hardly share their emotions so as not to look weak but oga is not in his right mind now.

Talk to him.
Shey you married him cos he had the best qualities so why must your first go to be divorce

Make sure you have tried every possible thing in this world to convince him before settling for a divorce.
Your husband is like your brother, treat him like your brother not your boyfriend that you can just drop when the going gets tough


I pray God comes through for your family, situations like this is heartbreaking.

I pray everything will be alright in the end.

What if after the so called DIVORCE. His life picks up. Would you come back ? How would you feel in the presence of his friends and his relatives ?

Kobojunkie:
How do you know he wasn't already gambling before he met and even married her?

However it was, something was the centre of affection.

shaybebaby:

"Single mother" here. Market dey fine. What a man won't do, make e commot for road, another will do.

She is earning her bread, worst case scenario, she has one less mouth to feed. Best case, she meets someone just as enterprising as she is with whom she can build build a future with, not just for herself but for kids.

Say no to irresponsible deadbeat men. You are not their mother.

Have you met an “enterprising man “? Just because your marriage didn’t work doesn’t mean OPs marriage shouldn’t. I’m certain the circumstances surrounding both marriages are different.

I AM SURE MOST OF THOSE WHO WOULD TELL YOU TO LEAVE YOUR HUSBAND ARE EITHER UNMARRIED OR BITTERED IN THEIR OWN MARRIAGE (BUT STILL IN IT).

LIKE SOMEONE RIGHTLY SAID, "If he's someone you can smell any whiff of potential in, keep pushing and encouraging him......Most men like yours, you disengage from them and within a year, you'd be regretting why and how you lost out at the "almost" hour.

HOW WAS HE TREATING YOU AND THE FAMILY BEFORE HE LOST HIS JOB?
IF HE GETS A NEW JOB TODAY, HOW DO YOU THINK HE WOULD BEHAVE? WOULD YOU STILL PLAN ON LEAVING HIM AS YOU INTEND TO?
ARE YOU SURE THERE IS NOT ONE JOHNNY IN THE CORNER SOMEWHERE PUTTING SOME CUNNING IDEAS IN YOUR HEAD?

EVERY MAN NEEDS A WOMAN WHO WOULD NOT ONLY SUPPORT HIM IN HIS DOWN TIME, BUT ALSO ENCOURAGE HIM TO BE HIS BETTER SELF.

DON'T LET SOME PEOPLE WHO DO NOT VALUE WHAT YOU HAVE MAKE YOU LOSE IT.
DO YOU THINK IT IS EASY TO DO A MAN'S JOB WITH RAISING A CHILD? SEEK OUT THE ADVICE OF A SINGLE MOTHER TO REALLY KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO DO A 2-MAN JOB.

MY SISTER, PLS THINK IT WELL BEFORE YOU TAKE A DRASTIC STEP.

AGAIN, IF YOU CAN SMELL A WHIFF OF POTENTIAL IN YOUR MAN, STICK WITH HIM, KEEP PUSHING AND ENCOURAGING HIM.
WHEN HE GETS OUT OF THAT HOLE, HE WILL APPRECIATE YOU THE MORE...

NO LISTEN TO BITTERED SOULS...

all4zionlover:
What would you advice in a situation where a husband loses his job due to gambling and decided not to make any effort in search of another job or business or any legal means of making even little money.

He just wakes up in the morning, have his bath, put on the AC and go back to sleep. Only expecting any little thing the wife can cook to eat? He wouldn't pay any bills, provide anything but very humble helping out with house cleaning and washing.

Knowing that the situation is not funny on the wife and two children.

The wife must struggle to make food available no matter how little for the children, because she can't watch the children go hungry.
In a situation like this, when men goes out looking for means of making food available for their children and family, he is comfortable not having anything to offer all the time.
Is this the character of a father and husband that loves?

Is this not enough reason to divorce him?

all4zionlover:
What would you advice in a situation where a husband loses his job due to gambling and decided not to make any effort in search of another job or business or any legal means of making even little money.

He just wakes up in the morning, have his bath, put on the AC and go back to sleep. Only expecting any little thing the wife can cook to eat? He wouldn't pay any bills, provide anything but very humble helping out with house cleaning and washing.

Knowing that the situation is not funny on the wife and two children.

The wife must struggle to make food available no matter how little for the children, because she can't watch the children go hungry.
In a situation like this, when men goes out looking for means of making food available for their children and family, he is comfortable not having anything to offer all the time.
Is this the character of a father and husband that loves?

Is this not enough reason to divorce him?

This is women for you when the good was going you neglected his bad habits which i am sure you too have,

Now things are not that rosy his bad habits you Put that front and center.

In this case i will say do what you like.


Its a marriage for better for worse but now worse part show and u show ur true self.

boxypane:
However it was, something was the centre of affection.

Gamblers are typically able to hide their problems from even family members, so I don't see how you would assume that he could not have been a gambler while he was dating her.

all4zionlover:
What would you advice in a situation where a husband loses his job due to gambling and decided not to make any effort in search of another job or business or any legal means of making even little money.

He just wakes up in the morning, have his bath, put on the AC and go back to sleep. Only expecting any little thing the wife can cook to eat? He wouldn't pay any bills, provide anything but very humble helping out with house cleaning and washing.

Knowing that the situation is not funny on the wife and two children.

The wife must struggle to make food available no matter how little for the children, because she can't watch the children go hungry.
In a situation like this, when men goes out looking for means of making food available for their children and family, he is comfortable not having anything to offer all the time.
Is this the character of a father and husband that loves?

Is this not enough reason to divorce him?

. This is not a scriptural reason to divorce a husband. A scriptural ground for divorce is committal of adultery.Grounds ofor separation with a view to reunion later are:. Non care for the wife and children ,. exposing the life of the wife to danger by beating her mercilessly,. etc ..

shaybebaby:


No disagreement here with what you've said. However remember that the successive failed goverments that you mention all have one thing in common- their gender.

Of course I know it is some useless Nigerian men that destroyed Nigeria and made it the joke of nations it is today.



The most painful part is when I see young Nigerians celebrate and support these failed Nigerian men just because of tribe. Once these failed politicians throw in the tribal card, Nigerian youths will forget their sufferings and struggles and turn against each other in the name of tribal supremacy battle that add no dime to their pockets

ejimatic:
. This is not a scriptural reason to divorce a husband. A scriptural ground for divorce is committal of adultery. Grounds ofor separation with a view to reunion later are:. Non care for the wife and children ,. exposing the life of the wife to danger by beating her mercilessly,. etc ..

Wrong! Scripture instead says that remarriage is allowed only if fornication was the reason for divorce. Divorce is not a sin at all. Instead, it is when one who is divorced then proceeds to remarry that the one could potentially be said to sin against God.

Gloriagee:
Wat does she lose, Mr. Mama I no fit lie you?

she doesn’t lose

No one knows

He’s using style to say

Be patient and be absolutely certain

Once you divorce

He’s gone forever

It’s a weighty decision and the impacts , only you will bear it

Think wisely and weigh everything

He may need support

After all he had a job before ?

all4zionlover:
What would you advice in a situation where a husband loses his job due to gambling and decided not to make any effort in search of another job or business or any legal means of making even little money.

He just wakes up in the morning, have his bath, put on the AC and go back to sleep. Only expecting any little thing the wife can cook to eat? He wouldn't pay any bills, provide anything but very humble helping out with house cleaning and washing.

Knowing that the situation is not funny on the wife and two children.

The wife must struggle to make food available no matter how little for the children, because she can't watch the children go hungry.
In a situation like this, when men goes out looking for means of making food available for their children and family, he is comfortable not having anything to offer all the time.
Is this the character of a father and husband that loves?

Is this not enough reason to divorce him?

He's depressed. Try to talk with him and get him out of the house on dates once a while. Just help him back on his feets, not everything is solved by divorce

all4zionlover:
He can not do that. They're mine.

Which they are yours? But a man can endure jobless Wife? And the moment reverse is the case here you Women would want the world to know you're the one running the home. Nonsense!

We all know you've found any dick you want to ride on so go ahead and bang that Dude who's giving you green light. No excuse wey you go take chop dicks around you dey find

@OP You must have seen the red flags while dating him, I guess you felt you could change him.. newsflash you can't change a man who isn't willing to change
It's just like guys making h0es housewives.. you live with the consequences.

all4zionlover:
What would you advice in a situation where a husband loses his job due to gambling and decided not to make any effort in search of another job or business or any legal means of making even little money.

He just wakes up in the morning, have his bath, put on the AC and go back to sleep. Only expecting any little thing the wife can cook to eat? He wouldn't pay any bills, provide anything but very humble helping out with house cleaning and washing.

Knowing that the situation is not funny on the wife and two children.

The wife must struggle to make food available no matter how little for the children, because she can't watch the children go hungry.
In a situation like this, when men goes out looking for means of making food available for their children and family, he is comfortable not having anything to offer all the time.
Is this the character of a father and husband that loves?

Is this not enough reason to divorce him?

Was he into gambling before you married him?
Why didn't you think.of divorce because of this gambling thing before he lost his job?
If he had won millions while gambling, will you be considering getting a divorce because heinto gambling?

You're being very selfish.

Anyways your husband has an addiction and it is your responsibility to help him out of it.
Make him your friend this period and always talk to him. He will regain his strength to hussle.

Then, no need to tell us. Just go ahead and divorce him.
You cannot get any meaningful advice from Nairaland

Mumu woman. Find small money to dey fund him bet9ja account so that he will be busy. Your spirit is against his gambling that's why he didn't make good profit from it. Support him with some good luck and he will cash out soon to the benefit of everyone

Kobojunkie:
Wrong! Scripture instead says that remarriage is allowed only if fornication was the reason for divorce. Divorce is not a sin at all. Instead, it is when one who is divorced then proceeds to remarry that the one could potentially be said to sin against God.

. Generally. We use fornication to describe immorality between two unmarried individuals while adultery is immorality between a married person with another married or unmarried person. The word in Greek Phornea is interpreted as adultery fornication bestiality ,lesbianism ,homosexuality etc Mathew 19 3-7 Mark 10 vrs 8-11 clearly shows that adultery is forbidden in a marriage. Sripturally it is the only ground for divorce before God in the Bible. However a wife or husband cheated by his or spouse can forgive his or her marital partner who commits adultery.Hiowever if the offended partner does not want to forgive the erring partner , he or she can divorce him or her. Any divorce on another ground apart from adultery is not accepted by God. So if the husband or wife remarries another person ,the person is commiting a sin before God because the first married was ended unscripturally. Separation may occur in a marriage though God does not want it. If it happens both husband and wife should look for a way of settling their misunderstanding.1Corrthuan 7: 7to 11

A sign that he wants to be the house husband.

hifocus:


He can never make it big. Not a curse, just fact of life for lazy men. Only by jackpot or huge family inheritance can he hit it big. Otherwise, no food for lazy man.

Sport betting is luck... As poor as he is, with just #100 he can hit 30m... If you abandon him, it papa God pick him call, he hits 30m... You will now want to come back...
U were there for only the money... You can leave him sinc he does not have what you want (money) you can also come back when he has the money... Money worshipers every where ..

ejimatic:
■ Generally. We use fornication to describe immorakity between two unmarried individuals while adultery is immorakity between a married person with another married or unmarried person. The word in Greek Phornea is interpreted as adultery fornication bestiakity ,lesbianism ,homosexuality etc Mathew 19 3-7 Mark 10 vrs 8-11 clearly shows that adultery is forbidden in a marriage. Sripturally it is the only ground for divorce before God in the Bible.
■ However a wife or husband cheated by his or spouse can forgive his or her marital partner who commits adultery. Hiowever if the offended partner dies not want to forgive the erring partner , he or she can divorce him or her. Any divorce on another ground apart from adultery is not accepted by God. So if the husband or wife remarries another person ,the person is commiting a sin before God because the first married was ended unscripturally. Separation may occur in a marriage though God dies not want it. If it haooens both husband and wife shiukd look for a way of settling their misunderstanding.

1. Again, you are wrong in your claim as instead scripture states instead that it is when one remarries that one could potentially sin against God — not when one gets a divorce.
https://www.nairaland.com/7078665/divorce-not-sin-jesus-christ

2. Jesus Christ no talk any of wetin you dey claim here abeg!

Oyerinde16:


Sport betting is luck... As poor as he is, with just #100 he can hit 30m... If you abandon him, it papa God pick him call, he hits 30m... You will now want to come back...
U were there for only the money... You can leave him sinc he does not have what you want (money) you can also come back when he has the money... Money worshipers every where ..

The money will not last because he is irresponsible. Let him tackle his problem of laziness and irresponsibility first before talking about hitting a jackpot.

Your case is different.. funny u

Richy4:

Which kind vow Una swear?

That day when them ask you...Do U promise to take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, forsaken all other,..
U opened your well brushed.. Colgate minty mouth.. Lipstick infested lips and 15 megawatts of smile and say I do.. u think say Na play u go play for there?🤭🙊

Make U stayOoo, U supposed to honour the "poorer" aspects of the vow😝

Na that AC part of the story got me laughing...Abi he no dey on AC before when he get job? How come u find it disgusting now?. make you just remove the AC and sell first before he first you remember am😂

The above person, named kingdollar is mature
In his comment. I like your style. Well done

Some times the man has look for job to no avail! This the time to show him true love, encourage him to go and look for job! Don’t command him, tell him everything is gonna be alright! Please don’t live him now when he need you the most. This man was providing before but just because no level now u are thinking of dumping him. The true love of a woman to a man shows when he is broke and Jobless! But for a Man U will know if he truly love when he has more money and he decide to stay with you, when he has money for plenty options.

Kingdollar is mature in his comment. Like your style. 👌

all4zionlover:
What would you advice in a situation where a husband loses his job due to gambling and decided not to make any effort in search of another job or business or any legal means of making even little money.

He just wakes up in the morning, have his bath, put on the AC and go back to sleep. Only expecting any little thing the wife can cook to eat? He wouldn't pay any bills, provide anything but very humble helping out with house cleaning and washing.

Knowing that the situation is not funny on the wife and two children.

The wife must struggle to make food available no matter how little for the children, because she can't watch the children go hungry.
In a situation like this, when men goes out looking for means of making food available for their children and family, he is comfortable not having anything to offer all the time.
Is this the character of a father and husband that loves?

Is this not enough reason to divorce him?

Funny question, so any small thing now na divorce? You guys are funny and it's obvious there's no case here, from he only gambles to he just wake up and sleep.

You don dey listen to friends my there.

Luckysbab:


If the wife is asking in a critiquing manner, he might not be willing to open up, knowing she will castigate/nag anyways.

Most times when men keep issues away from women, it's cos they don't expect a meaningful way out from them.

Imagine the pettiness of pointing out how he puts on the AC bla bla. You really think she's making sincere efforts to be helpful?

At one point or the other, a man might not have things figured out. That's human. And those around can only help them figure out their way.

It is petty to point out a jobless man is putting on AC every day?

Even two income household try to mix and match fan & AC to reduce the expenditure on utilities.

Should he be thinking of adding to their financial burden or reducing it?

Kingdollar28:



How do you know he doesn't have a plan?

He had money before bah?

But lost to gambling?

Sis, your husband is battling frustration/depression

Help him find his ways back

If you divorce him, na u loose

Mama I no fit lie you

I'm married and experienced

God bless you mate!

Those of us still single are listening very attentively and learning too!

Now the only thing we got to read is about his gambling lifestyle and how he lost his job and left with nothing. No one ever said something on how he has been a supporting husband financially during his days of working and gambling too! I'm just he was into gambling just to be able to make his family comfortable or was his lavishing his dividends on ladies?