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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father (36699 Views)
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Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Blackman101: 2:53pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
blood na blood, be very careful when dealing with Woman as it relate to marriage. My take and questions to ask 1. Go and find out the tradition of the real father of the wife to be and do same for your mother-in-law to be, 2.You wife to be step father cannot collect the bride price on your wife head. 3. if your wife dies after marriage, where will you take the body too and what are the rite required of you. 4. speak with the elders from your area too 3 Likes |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by thinkmoney(m): 2:53pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Kobojunkie:U no wise oh. I was being civil with u but he be like say u like wahala. I will post the Bible verse here now for u to read if he performed a TEST or not. Focus on the servant prayer in verse 14. OLODO Genesis 24:13-15 King James Version 13 Behold, I stand here by the well of water; and the daughters of the men of the city come out to draw water: 14 And let it come to pass, that the damsel to whom I shall say, Let down thy pitcher, I pray thee, that I may drink; and she shall say, Drink, and I will give thy camels drink also: let the same be she that thou hast appointed for thy servant Isaac; and thereby shall I know that thou hast shewed kindness unto my master. 15 And it came to pass, before he had done speaking, that, behold, Rebekah came out, who was born to Bethuel, son of Milcah, the wife of Nahor, Abraham's brother, with her pitcher upon her shoulder. |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by davidadenrele: 2:55pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Brotherly, Please don't not do introduction until you meet the biological father, i repeat do not do introduction until you meet the biological father!! talking to you from a real life experience, any lady that frowns at you meeting her biological father despite the difference or issue with her mother is not worth marrying and has a hidden agenda you might regret later endeavour to meet the father and when you do please move closer to the father from there you will be able discover one or two things about your wife and the mum, a word is enough for the wise. Don't be an instrument of manipulation by wife to be, and the mother, there's more to what's happening ensure you meet her father and please ask question, do your findings properly don't believe what she tells you until you meet the father. I wont say more than may the peace of God be with you! All the best. 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Major2022: 2:55pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Your would-be mother in-law is acting from the position of pain and hatred. If I were your fiancee's Step-father, I would have directed you to her biological father. Your fiancee might not have the luxury to know precisely what transpired between her biological father and mother. I'm safe to say, your mother in-law is trying to drag you into something you knew nothing about. My advice: locate her biological father to avoid circumstance of no second chance. 1 Like |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Kobojunkie: 2:57pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
thinkmoney:See this olodo! Servant's prayer now become investigation? The passage says absolutely none of what you claim though as it clearly states that the servant made up his mind when the girl brought water out for him to drink. 1 Like |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by IamMobisola(f): 2:57pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
MetaBroadband: The best thing to do is to call-off the wedding and move on with your life since you do not respect your fiancé’s wishes to leave the biological father out of the equation. They have told you to leave the man alone but you still want to go ahead and look for the man to hear his sides? And you think the man will tell you the truth if he actually abandoned the girl? This write up actually shows the kind of person you are and I wish that fiancé of yours would call off the wedding if you insist on not minding your business which is to the girl’s family you have always known since you started dating. 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Femi8586(m): 2:58pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Jovialjune1: Op should still see the biological father.. not because he owes him anything but just to know and hear from him directly first.. As usual, 99% of females on this post including some SIMPle men will tell Op to listen to his wife and mother in-law instructions just as you did. If his fiance wants to breakup with him because of that, then that shows she and the mother-in-law are extremely toxic. Then, OP dodged a bullet 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by turischool(m): 3:00pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Micheal56: What about if he finds out that it's the mother than abandon the man just to marry her current husband 1 Like |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by izibili44: 3:00pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Guy try and see the real you will hear alot from him. Just hear the other side first o |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Kolabalogun(m): 3:01pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Please do well to visit him no matter what. Not the issue of trusting the story or not but biological father! Thank God his not dead, it would have been another thing as the whole thing will be unclear. 1 Like |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by IamMobisola(f): 3:01pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
davidadenrele: This does not make sense. What about daughters that were actually abandoned by their biological fathers? What about daughters that were sexually assaulted by their biological fathers? What about cases of domestic violence on both mother and child? You think any reasonable daughter would still want to be involved with such father? |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Emaprince: 3:01pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
MetaBroadband:All those women posting on the front page and second page are all feminists. Taking advice from those people will lead you into a ditch you will never come out from. Do not take any single advice from them. Na bitter women full there. Listen to your fellow men . . And do the right thing 1 Like |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by kwasoly(m): 3:01pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
MetaBroadband: What kind of woman is her mother? I wan check something first before I advice you as an elder. |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Kobojunkie: 3:02pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
turischool:Will he also set himself up as judge and decider of whether the woman's reasons for abandoning him were just or not? 1 Like |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by SenatePresdo(m): 3:03pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
MetaBroadband: Go and meet the Biological father and hear his own side of the story, then compare and contrast. Make you no go allure curse for your future family. Imagine a father is still alive, and another man will collect bride price of her daughter? Go and hear from him first, if he paid for your finances mother's Bride price, and the mother's family has not returned the bride price, that girls is still traditionally his daughter. Better go and hear from him first, this if Africa not obodo oyinbo. We have culture and traditions. 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Emaprince: 3:03pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
IamMobisola:Then if that is the case. She should allow the man to find out himself. Any girl raised by a single mum is usually a red flag as majority of them end up being extremely promiscuous or man haters. Every man should be worried if their wife to be is not in good term with her dad..and advising him to not meet her real dad. Such man stands the risk of going through the same situation with their kids. |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by IamMobisola(f): 3:03pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
turischool: Funny enough OP would never be able to know the truth because he can’t say for sure who will be saying the truth especially since he never knew the father. The mother and daughter said he abandoned them, if the father also says the mother took the child away from him and it’s a lie, what would he do? Believe him? And still go ahead to invite him for the introduction against the wishes of his fiancé? 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by mrmislim: 3:04pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
oweniwe: Bla bla bla, I didn’t finish reading. So someone that was abandoned for over 20years should not be selfish? She should be selfless and accept a deadbeat after over 20years. Lol, and in case of childbirth complications it is a deadbeat of over 20years that they’ll be looking for to donate blood? Only the father might be able to donate blood to her? This is honestly laughable as you don’t what what real life is about, you don too watch African magic. And who cares what anyone says? It’s your type that will say trash about people while eating their food. Guy, nothing you fit tell me ehn, you’re a deadbeat and you better go look for your children and be actively involved in their lives, if not you’ll be the father in-law in this case. 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by REALretep(m): 3:04pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
MetaBroadband:You are the man here oo. You should know what you want as a man. Women will always be women. Standing your feet and going for what you want is what makes you a man. If you deeply feel you need to see her biological father, make up your mind, stand your feet on it and communicate that clearly to your fiancée. If her mum and stepfather, or any other person also feel otherwise, then respectfully and clearly communicate same to them. As long as you are mature enough to handle certain knowledge/information, then the more you know, the stronger you become and the more respect you garner. Besides, the more informed you are, the better your understanding of matters and the better decisions you make. 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Micheal56: 3:05pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
turischool:How u won take found out Bro get this You no fit justify this case I understand ur point |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Didi2d(m): 3:05pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
xavuv: God Almighty will continue to bless you with wisdom and wealth for the wisdom and sense you just shared now 1 Like |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Femi8586(m): 3:06pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Micheal56: You're being so emotional This kind of issue needs 80% logic, 20% emotions Read the posts of Op very well, you'll sense Op's fiance is not telling him the whole truth. She's still hiding many things from him which only meeting the biological father can reveal the untold truth. But you want Op to ignore the truth because you're emotional. Something that can hurt him later in future. OP should see the biological father not because he owes him anything but just to know him and hear from him first.. |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by IamMobisola(f): 3:06pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Emaprince: Lol, can we also say orphans are red flags too since they didn’t grow up with their parents? Or guys who grow up with single mothers are also red flags? How would the guy know who is telling the truth between the father and mother? Since when did he become a mind reader? 1 Like |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Ade1177: 3:06pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Micheal56: Don't spend 1naira For any girl You are not sure you can hold for 30yrs atleast |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Voiceofthestree: 3:07pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
MetaBroadband: Run or meet the biological father the woman is the problem don’t marry the girl the woman is a bad woman |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by bukatyne(f): 3:07pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Joseph77200: If you don't believe the lady and her mother, then end the relationship. Is it so hard? 1 Like |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by IamMobisola(f): 3:08pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Femi8586: From your write up you are saying the lady and her mother are lying, what’s to say the man wouldn’t also lie too? How would he know who is telling the truth ? Because the way you men castigate women is really irritating 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by Ufuka: 3:09pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Iam so shocked by many people's comment here, I hardly comment but I have to do so cos this's a matter between life and death. In Akwa Ibom State, there's no amendment to custom and tradition, don't allow your fiancee or your future mother inlaw to lead you astray, for the sake of your fiancee's life. Listen very well, go and get the marriage list from your fiancee's biological father, the bride price and every other thing should be paid to him and his kinsmen. The marriage should be done in his hometown and he's the one to sit as a father that very day. Any amount of money you can afford, give it to the man that took care of your fiancee. If your fiancee and the mother refuse to accept it, please and please cancel the marriage. A WORD IS ENOUGH FOR THE WISE. 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by liamjakes247: 3:10pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
My brother, eight years and counting I've been engaged to a lady who had this same kind of issues. this set of people are manipulative and work together to hit hard on men when you make them bitter. I've lost alot mentality, jobs, friends, business, it crept into isolating me from my immediate family but God took control. It's always a different thing in a man's world if he doesn't get it right in marriage. Well, people can be different tho' but I'll suggest you watch her closely. You should take your time before getting into a life long commitment. If she the type trying to enforce her will on you or saying stuffs about putting men down, laughing at men who find things difficult, or stories about men who never leaved right or been peppered by women. Bro, Stay out. Test her loyalty. Ask guys about her for street too. If you can, see her biological father, its hard for a biological father of a child to lie about their child. Please hear from her father o, pls do 1 Like |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by IamMobisola(f): 3:10pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
Ufuka: The best thing the OP can do is to call off the wedding. 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by 43Ronin: 3:10pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
OP in my culture you must ask questions before you marry. You must see that man, you must find out the truth. Blood(her parents character) is thicker than water(step father). It could be that her father abandoned them, it could also be vice versa. but either ways you must know. You don't have to go, some of your kinsmen can do that for you if you are afraid of doing it yourself. Remember why you are seeing the man, is not to pass on glory but to understand the character of her biological parents. |
Re: Should I Meet Her Biological Father Before Paying Bride-Price To Her Step-father by IamMobisola(f): 3:11pm On Jun 01, 2023 |
bukatyne:Like I don’t understand them. He should go and look for another woman who lives with both biological parents 2 Likes |
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