cococandy:


But you have nothing to say about a man who’s intentionally excluding his wife from jointly owned family property. All you people love is to cheat and oppress your women. Anyone who gives them advice on how to avoid being mistreated like this becomes the enemy

why are you lying?
For them to be living as husband and wife in UK it means they are legally married.

Everything he owns automatically belongs to his legally married wife and children by law.

So why is she worried and trying to demonize the man? What's wrong if a wife contributes for the growth of her home and husband?

The way you people hate men so much eeh.... God will punish all of you. You people forgot that you are nothing but just SPERM in the balls of a man.

JB0707:
My husband and I both live in the uk and we join all our money and investments together, all the properties my husband acquired in Nigeria doesn’t have my name on it, at first I wasn’t bothered but now i am bothered because his family is chaotic. I started asking for my name to be included and i am not ok with the response am getting. I feel i am just working and I have nothing in my name. I love him but I don’t trust his family. Should i keep insisting or start my investment separately. I am just confused

All your property documents should have borne both your names.
For you to realize this now! It's not late.

For all joint property acquisitions let both your names appear on the original documents.

For example: Mr Haji Buhary and Mrs. Tinu Buhary

Not: Mr & Mrs Buhary
Not: Mr Buhary

Speak to your lawyers to effect the necessary changes. So that there will not be tears in future.

N. B. I'm a professional Real Estate Appraiser. I buy, sell and value landed properties

He should have put your name! You didnt notice after the first property?

JB0707:
My husband and I both live in the uk and we join all our money and investments together, all the properties my husband acquired in Nigeria doesn’t have my name on it, at first I wasn’t bothered but now i am bothered because his family is chaotic. I started asking for my name to be included and i am not ok with the response am getting. I feel i am just working and I have nothing in my name. I love him but I don’t trust his family. Should i keep insisting or start my investment separately. I am just confused

JB0707:
My husband and I both live in the uk and we join all our money and investments together, all the properties my husband acquired in Nigeria doesn’t have my name on it, at first I wasn’t bothered but now i am bothered because his family is chaotic. I started asking for my name to be included and i am not ok with the response am getting. I feel i am just working and I have nothing in my name. I love him but I don’t trust his family. Should i keep insisting or start my investment separately. I am just confused

Start your investment separately.

Kelechi009:


- "Should i keep insisting or start my investment separately. I am just confused"

No, you're not. I reckon that you know exactly what is going on, your spouse has no financial integrity and it did not start today.

- "I love him but I don’t trust his family"

No you don't trust HIM, his family does not have anything to do with this, your husband is trying to defraud you in the name of love and you know it but you do not want to call a spade a spade.

- "I started asking for my name to be included and i am not ok with the response am getting"

You know within you that your husband is a thief, just like almost every other Nigerian out there supporting Tinubus, they are all thieves.

Nigerians globally do not have financial integrity of any sort, and your husband included. Almost every Nigerian is trying to defraud one another, Sisters, Brothers, Family members, Girlfriends, Boyfriends.

You are sighted ..

You have actually spoken well

ihavesense:

Do you know that as a lawfully wedded wife, she and the man’s children have a right to inheritance of his wealth. So why the fuss.

Then the properties can also be only in her name.

Kooldon:
If you guys are legally married, then you have nothing to worry about.
However, it seems your are more concern about your husband demise before you but what if the reverse will be the case?

Wow, just wow. To think you are also a woman. All I have to say is GOD bless you. May the GOOD LORD increase your wisdom.

JB0707:
Should i keep insisting or start my investment separately. I am just confused

Madam, keep insisting and stop investing together. Likewise, start planning on your own investment. Don't be like me. I am facing my own deed now

Do the fight thing madam. Make sure he includes your name. His family or one side chic can claim possession in case of eventuality.

The deed is done already. Going forward start including you name is any future purchase, or have you own seperate investment solely in your name or your children's name.

maxiuc:
Mr and Mrs is enough

Mr and Mrs is not enough.
Documents must bear full name of both parties
Mr Dele can have multiple Mrs Dele and his favourite is assumed to have ownership - because he will make sure of it

Let him will some properties to your name

JB0707 I strongly suggest you record (or better, video) your conversations when discussing with your husband about adding your name to your documents.

You should also begin gathering other evidence at this point. Chat screenshots, messages, and all.

So, even if he refuses, or he or his family try to be funny in the future, you'll have evidence to help your position.

[quote author=UjuJoan2 post=129858556]

I think the mistake is already made, if you make it as issue it might cause problems in your marriage.

Going forward, start your investments separately and You need to put your foot down. If he insists on joint investments, then make sure you see your name on the document before you contribute anything.

It’s good to be wise in love, to avoid stories that touch.

Trust me, I’m talking from experience![/quote]

Ah Uju, your billionaire burned you?

The way woman they think ehn... Like say she cant die before the husband..

Kooldon:
If you guys are legally married, then you have nothing to worry about.
However, it seems your are more concern about your husband demise before you but what if the reverse will be the case?

The bolded is mostly if the assets are in the UK, not Nigeria.

Odotech:
Your husband is investing in Nigeria because he knows Nigeria is a lawless place where should both of you divorce today, you will get nothing from the courts. Courts here pervert justice. But if it was in UK he invested, whether he puts your name or not, the properties belong to you both except you had prenuptial agreement. He may have his fear of losing out if divorced for insisting on investing here in Nigeria. You too have the fear of losing out because of his choice of a lawless country as investment destination. The middle point should have been investing in Nigeria under you both's full legal name ie Mrs Jane Sobotie and Mr Jude Sobotie. In law, "Mr and Mrs Jude Sobotie" is not recognized name. Tell him to put your name or henceforth forget about investment in Nigeria. Support only joint investment in UK where you have automatic right to any property in his own name or invest in your own name here in Nigeria if he refuses to include you in the existing properties. Make him understand that you know and understand his fears is about losing it all through divorce but that Nigerian courts and systems are already biased towards men in the event of divorce, so your legal name must be included. Should he relocate to Nigeria tomorrow or secretly marry another Nigerian woman, she automatically inherits properties built with your money because your name is not on those documents. Nigerian law recognizes not just court marriages but also customary marriages so your own properties will be shared between you and the secret wife of your husband. You seem like a good woman. The type most of us would like to have really. You appear supportive and not interested in divorcing your man like we read about Nigerian women dealing with their husbands in the UK

The bolded is succinctly stated

Tallesty1:
Then why not add her name to the papers and save everyone all these stress? Mind you that what is being discussed here is not his wealth but their investment. Why is her name not included in the docs of properties she co-own?

In marriage, you don't fan the embers of suspicion and doubt, you quench it with transparency.

I don't blame the man sha, I blame the woman who sees reason in trusting a man that his family cannot be trusted.

I doubt this is coming from a man.

How were you able to ascertain that the man's family is not trustworthy by merely what the lady alleged?

Have you been able to hear from any member(s) of the man's family or just trying to dance to the tune of your female friends here and massage their ego?

The lady in question seems to have made some new friends and is already been ill-advised by someone. Suddenly,she remembers that her husband was making investments in Nigeria in his name alone,when 1+1 in marriage is equals to 1.

Unless,they are live-in lovers,there is absolutely nothing to worry about here.
She is the sole beneficiary by law,( both in UK and Nigeria)in case of her husband's demise.

There is absolutely nothing wrong in having your own investments. Start now

JB0707:
My husband and I both live in the uk and we join all our money and investments together, all the properties my husband acquired in Nigeria doesn’t have my name on it, at first I wasn’t bothered but now i am bothered because his family is chaotic. I started asking for my name to be included and i am not ok with the response am getting. I feel i am just working and I have nothing in my name. I love him but I don’t trust his family. Should i keep insisting or start my investment separately. I am just confused

You seem to be a good woman who is supportive of your husband and you and hubby probably have a good relationship already and this is now threatening that relationship.

Can I ask, how did you approach him about adding your name to the investment document? I hope you did not make mention of the fact that his family is chaotic? No man will take lightly if you use style or subtly make snide comments about his family (even if it's true).

If you did approach this respectfully, I will advise that you reach out to your hubby again and let him know that for your peace of mind, you'd want a situation where you want Mr Joe Bloggs and Mrs Mary Bloggs are listed as owners of a property or investment that you are both committing money to.

If he then insists that he won't do that, then just let him know in that meeting that henceforth, you won't be contributing jointly as you "feel" alienated.

Then let him know you'd want to suggest that you invest separately so that you both can have that peace of mind. If he gets angry, don't flinch. At some point, he will come back to his sense (if he is a good man).

Don't try to invest behind his back (unless you are ready to see shege in your marriage).

I live in the UK, and I can tell you, it's very hard to manage a family on your own if you divorce in this UK. Don't take a harsh action because you want to prove your right.

Use communication and at least, if you don't agree on the joint name, at least you both still have a marriage with segregated investment plans.

JB0707:
My husband and I both live in the uk and we join all our money and investments together, all the properties my husband acquired in Nigeria doesn’t have my name on it, at first I wasn’t bothered but now i am bothered because his family is chaotic. I started asking for my name to be included and i am not ok with the response am getting. I feel i am just working and I have nothing in my name. I love him but I don’t trust his family. Should i keep insisting or start my investment separately. I am just confused

You are between a rock and hard place.

If you are unable to get investments ( in Nigeria) till date in both your names, then a hard stop on joint future investments is needed.

If you decide to go Solo, then your future investments will have to be in Nigeria in your sole name, for the same reason you are not comfortable with the investments being in his sole name in Nigeria. If things go wrong, you will have little to no legal recourse in that country.

Invest in your sole name in Nigeria, and the same will apply to him.

But do not make a sole investment in the uk. If you do and the relationship goes south, that is still considered marital property as it was acquired during the course of the marriage. He will be entitled to part of it regardless of who's name it's in.

All in all, he doesn't seem like he is trustworthy or financially transparent. I'd be seriously taking a good hard look at whether I want to remain with someone I cannot trust to deal in good faith.

Continue to gently ask him to include your name in your joint property, while going forward you buy property in your own name and carrying him along.

Don't buy any property in your name without keeping him in confidence, so he knows you don't have hidden agenda. If he asks why you're doing this, let him know you're doing this for your children and your own future.

Cheers.

JB0707:
My husband and I both live in the uk and we join all our money and investments together, all the properties my husband acquired in Nigeria doesn’t have my name on it, at first I wasn’t bothered but now i am bothered because his family is chaotic. I started asking for my name to be included and i am not ok with the response am getting. I feel i am just working and I have nothing in my name. I love him but I don’t trust his family. Should i keep insisting or start my investment separately. I am just confused

cococandy:


But you have nothing to say about a man who’s intentionally excluding his wife from jointly owned family property. All you people love is to cheat and oppress your women. Anyone who gives them advice on how to avoid being mistreated like this becomes the enemy

If you are this wise, why u never marry ? Na bad Belle dey worry u. U want scatter a happy home. Yoour papa no cheat ? Taaaa

JB0707:
My husband and I both live in the uk and we join all our money and investments together, all the properties my husband acquired in Nigeria doesn’t have my name on it, at first I wasn’t bothered but now i am bothered because his family is chaotic. I started asking for my name to be included and i am not ok with the response am getting. I feel i am just working and I have nothing in my name. I love him but I don’t trust his family. Should i keep insisting or start my investment separately. I am just confused

You can insists and at the same time start your investment separately.

jimmyvic:
This claim is false...you are ignorant of the law, sir.

Quote the law i'm ignorant of.

Kobojunkie:
What about the woman? Why would or does she not know this too?

sometimes we lie to ourselves to protect our hearts from breaking. She might already know and that’s why she is here looking for someone to tell her that she’s wrong and her husband could never. Yet he absolutely can and is already doing it to her face.

If not, this topic won’t even be on NL. The moment the man noticed his wife is not being included in property that is being purchased with family funds, he should have fixed the issue immediately before she even had time to complain. So I think she knows

Lexusgs430:



Not in a lawless country like Nigeria.........

That's a different matter

Look at the type of coddling we are advocating for a man who’s being deliberately sly to his lady.
She should gently carry him along 😒

folla:
Continue to gently ask him to include your name in your joint property, while going forward you buy property in your own name and carrying him along.

Don't buy any property in your name without keeping him in confidence, so he knows you don't have hidden agenda. If he asks why you're doing this, let him know you're doing this for your children and your own future.

Cheers.

Joint account and joint investment na scam. Have your own thing to avoid stories that touch the heart.

UjuJoan2:


I think the mistake is already made, if you make it as issue it might cause problems in your marriage.

Going forward, start your investments separately and You need to put your foot down. If he insists on joint investments, then make sure you see your name on the document before you contribute anything.

It’s good to be wise in love, to avoid stories that touch.

Trust me, I’m talking from experience!

Listen to this person and cry later, a typical advice coming from someone who has scattered her family and now trying hard to empower women with ill advice

cococandy:
Look at the type of coddling we are advocating for a man who’s being deliberately sly to his lady.
She should gently carry him along 😒

It's the "gently" that landed her in this predicament.