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My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by BlindAngel: 2:44pm On Jul 18 |
Good afternoon Nairalanders, my wife gave birth last week which was Saturday July 13th, that day was also my birthday, she gave birth through CS, this is our first child, and it's a boy. This week Saturday is our baby's naming ceremony but my wife is insisting that her pastor must be the one officiate the naming the child, we've been disagreeing over this for some couple of days now, she has called me all sorts of names, insulted me that I'm a very wicked man that I have no conscience, that after she pain and tearing she went through and still going through, I can't make this as a sacrifice for her, that I choose my family over her. She said so because my family also insist too that the naming must be done by our pastor. But she's keying on the fact that she won't agree for the naming to be done in my church that it must be done by her pastor, she has cried and insulted me regarding this. Yesterday when we were arguing about this same particular issue she starting crying endlessly and calling me a wicked man. I have finally agreed for her to use her pastor to do the naming, although I don't know her pastor and haven't seen him before, but I only agreed because of the CS operation she did while giving birth, her endless crying might affect her, if not there's absolutely no way possible I'd have agreed. I must say that she doesn't know the repercussions of what sha has done by challenging my authority and always wanting to have her way with tears all the time. But time sha tell, I'm in so much rage right now, and I'm trying my possible best to control myself and not to loose my anger over this. 26 Likes 3 Shares
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Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Namaster: 2:46pm On Jul 18 |
First of all, do you mean she wants her pastor to CHOOSE the name of your baby or OFFICIATE the naming ceremony? Secondly, do a DNA test to confirm rhat you'll not be raising the bastard son of her pastor. This woman obviously WORSHIPS her pastor. It's not UNIMAGINABLE that she's tendered her pussy as offering one or two times. Next you need to face the fact that a SCAMMER (the pastor) and a STRANGE man (still the pastor) exerts more INFLUENCE in your marriage than you do. And ask yourself whether you still want to be in that marriage. A strange man holds the remote control to your relationship. Your marriage subsists by his will. Are you okay with that? NEXT, she is blatantly MANIPULATING you without remorse. You are NOT responsible for the complications that led to the C-Section. Even if it's because the baby is too big because you are a big man, it's still NOT your fault. Her eyes were wild open when she CHOSE to marry you and have your child. If it's yours, that is. STOP letting her use child birth as an ammo for manipulating you. Because if you capitulate today, you best belive she'll NEVER stop. Next she'll weaponise the child. Then her next pregnancy would be a NUCLEAR weapon. Everything you previously disagreed on would be tabled again UNTIL she has her way. Maybe she'll demand you DONATE your house to her pastor and rent a room and parlour for yourself. Put your foot down and DON'T even compromise. Don't allow her pastor to be involved in ANYWAY when it comes to naming the child unless DNA proves the child is his. 418 Likes 31 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by vanvickie(m): 2:52pm On Jul 18 |
Continue giving room for manipulations... Someday the pastor will also be the one to determine something more than just the name of your child... BTW.. Ain't both of u supposed to be attending the same Church? Smh. 187 Likes 10 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Sonnobax15(m): 2:55pm On Jul 18 |
![]() The respect these women accord to their pastors,I wish they can give the same to their husbands,most marriages that had broken up would have at least seen the light of the day.. Mr. Man,you better man up and never give any mother fvcker disguising to be called by God to play your role as the man of the house, unless she's hiding something from you ![]() Make God no give me wife wey go dey obsessed with any daddy G.O cha, because I know for sure I won't condone that... 142 Likes 9 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by BlindAngel: 2:57pm On Jul 18 |
vanvickie: That's the church she was attending before we got married, so I don't want to stop her in order for it not to seems like I'm wicked and for her not to call me names. Yesterday she reminded me that after our marriage my family forced her to do thanks giving at our church. She has been saying this for long, but stopped, until yesterday. I told her that doing thanks giving at our church is now a bad thing or something that's forceful? She cried a lot yesterday because of our argument of this naming. Same tears she used in forcing me into getting married to her when I wasn't in anyway ready. 52 Likes 9 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by FreeStuffsNG: 2:57pm On Jul 18 |
BlindAngel:Naming is one part, another part is the name that will eventually be on its birth certificate. You will be the one to decide that one so chill for now. Collect names from everyone but if I were you, in this situation, I will settle for the name any of the two grandfathers submit for the naming ceremony ![]() 111 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by BlindAngel: 3:00pm On Jul 18 |
FreeStuffsNG: We both have agreed on the name, she suggested it and i agreed, though it pains me that I wasn't the one that came up with the name fully, but we've already agreed and changing my mind right now will lead to an heavy quarrel and lot's of endless crying from her. That I'm wicked and heartless that after we've both agreed, I changed things. 2 Likes 7 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by FreeStuffsNG: 3:03pm On Jul 18 |
BlindAngel:If you are Yoruba. It's customary to give the honor of naming your first child, especially first grand child, to your father. It doesn't matter whether you both previously agree or not. You will both be grandparents someday too and she will be glad when your son honors you in like manner. That's the only way out now. However, like I stated, don't overthink it now, there's still time after the ceremony. What matters most is the name that makes the birth certificate and the popular one you will call him at home. 127 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Maeve7: 3:09pm On Jul 18 |
BlindAngel: Why are you so concerned to be called wicked? The fact that you gave in because you were afraid the crying would have a negative impact on her after CS shows that you are not wicked. Why is it so important which church you people go to? Take turns. This time it’s her church, next time it’s your church. Problem solved. 42 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by BlindAngel: 3:10pm On Jul 18 |
Namaster: Thanks for your input, what I actually meant is that she insist on her pastor officiating the naming ceremony. Which she's always crying endlessly whenever we start arguing about It. 1 Like |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by psucc(m): 3:10pm On Jul 18 |
Maybe the Pastor was part of the reproduction process. 85 Likes 8 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Mcreloaded(m): 3:27pm On Jul 18 |
The parents of your wife gave you goat but refused to give you the rope. You go suffer for this goat wey you marry dey call wife. When she is through with you I can bet my balls that you will regret the day you ever set eyes on her 96 Likes 7 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Gr8mind07(m): 3:30pm On Jul 18 |
Bro,it's obvious you have been a victim of her manipulating tactics since courtship . Whatever the background church of a lady, it is expected the she bids the church bye - bye at the wedding ceremony and follows her husband to his church. This is the reason that marriage is conducted in the lady's church and thanksgiving at the Man's church. Even her so called Pastor knows this. 127 Likes 9 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Namaster: 3:31pm On Jul 18 |
BlindAngel: REFUSE! And NEVER compromise! Plus when the naming is finished and she's recuperated from the CS, ban your wife from setting foot in that church. Or having ANY contact with that pastor. It's MADNESS to be weeping over the fact that you want YOUR child to be named in your church and by your pastor. Also the fact that she's BLOWING UP on you and GUILT-TRIPPING you over it is HIGHLY suspicious. She either has an AMOROUS relationship with the pastor or he has BRAINWASHED her. Either way, letting her stay in the church is STUPID. Also, you already bleeped up by letting your wife go to a different church in the first place. Church is a fertile ground for illicit romance, outright fornication and UNBRIDLED adultery. You bleeped up BIG time. And you're dealing with the aftermath NOW. Unless you do what I suggest, be ready for MORE variations of the same arguments. Because as time goes on, she'll take the kid to her church because she's nursing. When he becomes a toddler, she'll tell you he stills his mum to look after him. Finally when he starts being MORE aware, she'll corner you and tell you that you just CAN'T take him to a different chuch since he's gotten used to hers. If you yield TODAY, you will not only LOSE your wife to a strange man but your son too. Stop that NONSENSE now! 133 Likes 10 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by BlindAngel: 3:39pm On Jul 18 |
Namaster: It seems I have been too easy and quiet on her, I will do as you say and ban her from going to that church and if she refused, she should pack her load and go back to her parents house, I have really condole enough of her rubbish and tears at any slight arguments. I paid 396k for her cs operation, and no where my name or surname appeared on the receipt that was given to me, it's her name and her father's name that was on it. This is because after marriage she has not changed her surname to my name, this hurt me a lot because her elder sister that is just a baby mama to her boyfriend has already changed her Facebook sur name to her boyfriend surname. Whereas my wife is still answering her father's name, I have told myself that if she can't think and do this willingly, I will never and ever confront her concerning this. I have been allowing her to do whatever she want but this, she has over stepped her boundaries, seems I have been too easy on her. 82 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by advanceDNA: 3:48pm On Jul 18 |
BlindAngel: U fell fo cheap manipulation all to please pastor..... U are wicked, u are evil..she did CS.. ![]() .....u will keep falling for it till the end of ur days.... 27 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Namaster: 3:49pm On Jul 18 |
BlindAngel: My dude, you STARTED your marriage with a big bang of premium fuuuck up! This woman has ZERO regard for you. She DOES NOT respect or love you. Probably doesn't even like you. You are just an expense account to this woman. Any woman who has a MODICUM of respect for her husband would be EAGER to take his name. A couple of weeks ago, we all read about how Diezani Allison-Madueke's ex-husband, Allison Amaechina Madueke, took her to court just to get to STOP using his name after divorce. That woman served as a Minister under 2 different Presidents before she became the first female President of OPEC. Yet she took NOT one but TWO of her husbands name. But your wife (probably a stay-at-home wife) REFUSED to take your name and you still went along with the wedding. You started on the WRONG track. FIRST thing you need to do now is get a DNA test for that boy to confirm it's yours. Because the series of disrespect and disregard your wife has displayed towards you makes it highly UNLIKELY that she'd let you get her pregnant. Ypu already spent #400K on the kid so find money for the DNA test. And do it ASAP before you sink in MORE money into raising her pastor's kid. Meantime, put a STOP to every manipulation. Don't let her dictate ANYTHING or manipulate her way through anything. Even with tears, don't give in! 98 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by advanceDNA: 3:53pm On Jul 18 |
Maeve7: Next time she will use CS or pains of birth, or the stress of 9months pregnancy she carried .. The manipulation card is always available in women's arsenal use.......if all doesn't work, they will make u home unbearable for you... Women don't need peace to survive, they can keep malice for 2 years... 30 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Oche211(m): 4:10pm On Jul 18 |
BlindAngel: Stamp you feet on the ground and let the worse happen. If you can successfully have your way now without giving in to her manipulation, she will stop. Let her call you a wicked man. Also make sure you do everything to stop her from going to that church. Make sure she comes to your own church. If she doesn't want, let her and the marriage go. You are playing with a time bomb. If my guess is right, your marriage is still too young. This is why we always advice against marrying out of pity 52 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Nicepoker(m): 4:14pm On Jul 18 |
The real Father is that pastor. Have you done DNA? ![]() 31 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by BlindAngel: 4:20pm On Jul 18 |
Oche211: This is what I intend doing, thanks for your advise, I will do as you advised as it's the absolutely best thing to do right now. Although I have already given in on letting her pastor officiate the naming because of her CS operation, for her cry not to affect her. But after everything, she won't go to that church again and I swear to God that if she refused she will pack her load and go, after all the love isn't there and I'm not sexually attracted to her. Same tears she used in manipulating me in getting married to her is same tears she's still using in getting her way after every little misunderstanding. I will stop her from going to that church, I have had enough already. 28 Likes |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Oche211(m): 4:21pm On Jul 18 |
BlindAngel: What am I just reading? You really started off on the wrong note. That lady doesn't have any regards for you. I don't want to be an agent of doom but if you don't do something quickly, this marriage is headed for the rock. You are not in charge of your home. Tell her to either sit up or go back to her father's house. One, that pastor must never officiate the child naming ceremony Two, make sure you do a DNA Three, discreetly monitor your wife, also have a way of reading her chats. I suspect she will be deleting chats. So make sure you have an app that recover her deleted chats Four, by all means she must not step her feet in that her own church again. Five, tell her to either do a change of name now or be ready to go back to her father's house. Be firm and decisive. She's manipulative. She will destroy you if you don't act fast to put her on the right track. 50 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Sapasenator: 4:26pm On Jul 18 |
Next, she will insist her pastor watch while you guys fvuck. Nigerians and their compulsive obsessions with the worship of pastors, very disgusting! 31 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Oche211(m): 4:28pm On Jul 18 |
BlindAngel: You still want her to have her way this last time. You are not ready for anything. If it's me, I will simply tell her I have changed my mind. Let her tell her pastor not to come. That you have made arrangements with your own pastor. No matter how she disagrees, don't back down. Also, call her father and explain to him and tell him to call both his daughter and their pastor to order. Tell him your wife has become unreasonable and for all she's done, you aren't comfortable with their pastor coming for the naming. This is a test to know the family you married into. Just call her father and tell him to talk to his daughter. In all your discussion with him, insist on not seeing the said pastor in your house on that day. Again, if it's possible, make sure you take your family far from the church. That's if you can't be firm with this decision 42 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by BlindAngel: 4:28pm On Jul 18 |
Oche211: We had an argument few weeks ago and she was crying as usual, she was still pregnant then. I told her that she's always using her tears to manipulate me and she swore with the life of the fetus on her womb that she isn't, since then I thought maybe she doesn't know when the tears start flowing and might not be manipulating me, but with what I saw yesterday after the argument, that thought is no longer there, I now fully believe that she's manipulating me with tears at every slight arguments or quarrels. Regarding her changing her name, this is one thing I have swore never and ever to tell her to do, even though it hurts me to my bone marrow most especially seeing her elder sister on Facebook answering her boyfriend name. I swear that it hurts me so much that she is still answering her father's name but I won't ever confront her about this, common sense is supposed to tell her that immediately after marriage she's supposed to change her surname to my own name, even if it's just her Facebook name for the now. But no, she didn't, she registered for antinental with her surname, and that's why the money I paid for her CS has her name and surname on the receipt. 8 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Foodqueen(f): 4:31pm On Jul 18 |
You allowed her attend a separate church while she was pregnant, it's only natural that she would want her church to christen the child. U can take the dedication to your family church. Ndo, alot of sacrifice for a peaceful marriage. 15 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by BlindAngel: 4:32pm On Jul 18 |
Namaster: Worst of it all I have already started hearing storing flying around that she's controlling me, all because I gave in for her to allow her pastor officiate the wedding. I refused and she told me that my mom is controlling me, even though my mom has absolutely nothing to do for me wanting our pastor to do the naming. I, my mom and all my siblings are attending same church, so that's the manipulating word she used for me and I agreed for her pastor to officiate it, I agreed because if another ear should hear such word, It'd spread out and people might believe it's true. As for she answering my surname, I have already promised myself not to confront her about it, because I expect her to do that immediately after our marriage. But until this very moment she's still answering her father's name. 2 Likes |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by SKhanmi: 4:34pm On Jul 18 |
Guy man, no be to dey talk online say you go do am. Make sure you do exactly what oche listed. Else na die you dey so. And learn to stamp your feet down abi no be you dey pay the bills. Face your own family and hers if necessary. Else you'll be used and dumped later in the future. 23 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Oche211(m): 4:37pm On Jul 18 |
BlindAngel: You see, the issue is that you didn't properly vet her before marrying her. If you did, you would have seen so many redflags. If you aren't sexually attracted to her so much, why then did you fall for her tears to marry her. You see this naming ceremony thing now? It's the perfect opportunity for you to stamp your authority. Sometimes, you don't have to wait for women to make some decisions, you make it for them. Understand that women are not capable of making sound, logic decisions without proper guidance. You never lead your wife during courtship, you are not leading her now. My woman can't even use tears to manipulate me, cos my No will still be my No and my yes will still be my yes. If you like cry an ocean of tears. So since she know this, crying or manipulation is out of it. I am surprised at this your predicament. 25 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by BlindAngel: 4:38pm On Jul 18 |
Oche211: Her mom already left their father when they were still young, she was brought up by a single mom. Last year someone told me that while they were still married her mom was bringing small boys into their matrimonial bed to sex, on the day of our traditional marriage, one mama that lives close to where I lives called me to the corner and said she has a lot to tell me, after the traditional marriage I went to see her and she told me that my wife elder sister is doing runs which I I'm very much aware of, because she came to visit me one day, her and my wife that was when she was still my girlfriend, and she was boosting that no boy will and can ever Bleep her for free. Even her post on whatsapp status is all about sex and Bleep, smoke etc. She told me also that her mom was once bringing young boys into their house while still married that she lived close to her before. I didn't noticed any of this trait on my wife, "then girlfriend" and I haven't still noticed despite monitoring and cloning her WhatsApp. 3 Likes |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by Oche211(m): 4:40pm On Jul 18 |
Foodqueen: Which kind yeye sacrifice. His wife is simply manipulating him to always have her way. Marriages like this don't usually last long. A marriage where a woman always have her ways is a disaster waiting to her. She will start seeing him as a weak man and gradually she will start misbehaving until she self destroy 26 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Wife Insisting That Her Pastor Must officiate our child naming ceremony. by BlindAngel: 4:41pm On Jul 18 |
SKhanmi: I'm the one paying the bills of course, yesterday I was angry and told her to buy all the maltina and meat pie then she can call her pastor to officiate the naming. She went silent and started calling me wicked, and heartless. I spent almost 400k on her CS spent 73k on the naming but it's time to make a decision and she want to make it. During our marriage, her mother refused to appear in the church because I said I won't do court marriage, I saw it on my wife chat with her elder sister, she said her mom said she won't come because I'm thinking rubbish by not doing court marriage. And truly she didn't come. 2 Likes |
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