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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? (31026 Views)
Wife To Husband; Yes I Slept With Another Man. What Should He Do? / Bob-manuel Don-christian: 'My Wife Had A Son For Another Man' / My Wife Had An Affair!! (2) (3) (4)
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Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Oyindidi(f): 10:54am On Nov 23, 2017 |
Xmen149:na my own side of the story be that |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by adadike281(f): 10:55am On Nov 23, 2017 |
CaptainJeffry:The way I see it, the guy is d one loving truly biko! |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by complet: 10:56am On Nov 23, 2017 |
royalamour: |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Xmen149(m): 10:56am On Nov 23, 2017 |
ray121: not being tribalistic at all,it seems lots of Yoruba support this for the guy to go on,seems they cultural backing to this but no one should subject this guy to emotional blackmail..haba!! Dude you where never told or had knowledge of this or planned for it before marriage so any decision you take you will never be blamed. in the case of name.,in igbo tradition once a lady gives birth without the responsible man paying her bride price the baby automatically bears the mothers maiden name so also in many occasions where there is divorce and the bride price is returned.The said child is supposed to be with her family and she can be sending anything she wants to to them(you can then choose to make contributions at times as responsibility to your in-laws if the child bears their surname) not disrupting your marriage. If you choose the other way,do it because it makes you happy not responsibility or care or useless show-love blackmail cos that's nonsense after-all people still put people on scholarship IF they have the means and dnt expect anything back. your wife and kids is your first responsibility if anyone is not ok with that face your kid and ur self alone. relate to her family in meeting,build your own family young man.
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Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Xmen149(m): 10:57am On Nov 23, 2017 |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Nobody: 11:00am On Nov 23, 2017 |
adadike281:...and fooling himself too in the process. He knows the answer to his questions but he chose to disturb people here. |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Oyindidi(f): 11:06am On Nov 23, 2017 |
Xmen149:Abi, how can a man do traditional marriage and white wedding without knowing your wife has a baby less than a year. I don't think it's possible cos someone would av leaked the secret. That lady is a loose woman, how can you let another man touch when breastfeeding and got pregnant after your first baby daddy denied the baby(the boy). 1 Like |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Barmmyshoes(f): 11:10am On Nov 23, 2017 |
olagoke157: How about this one in this thread www.nairaland.com/4179853/nice-gift-ur-spouse-festive |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Barmmyshoes(f): 11:11am On Nov 23, 2017 |
olagoke157: How about this one in this thread www.nairaland.com/4179853/nice-gift-ur-spouse-festive |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Afonjanightmare(m): 11:13am On Nov 23, 2017 |
This OP, sorry but you are a FOOL!!! You said you are a young man but married a second hand woman lolzzzz, with your young age you could get the best of best women but you chose a second hand woman, you won't regret it now but later, how on earth would someone sensible marry a woman that has given birth for another man? I wonder if this story is made up cos it sounds stupid. How on earth did your family accept this woman in question, I'm sure you fought them, I weak for you o!!!!!!!!!! |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Nobody: 11:15am On Nov 23, 2017 |
Both of u should sit and talk. But I believe true love take it all |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by RZArecta(m): 11:20am On Nov 23, 2017 |
ray121:This is something you both really need to discuss even if it means bringing extended family into the matter later on. Do you love the boy ? Are you willing to accept him as your own son ? Are you willing to legally adopt him as your son ? What relationship if any does your wife still hold with the boys father ? Are you guys sure the father isn't going to come around a few years down the line to claim the boy after all your sweat ? You guys really need to talk sha |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Xmen149(m): 11:20am On Nov 23, 2017 |
Oyindidi: Forget,.womens brain are designed to consentrate on upto two tasks at a time perfectly,if she decide to hide it no jupiter will make it come to light till when she wants............ even the in-laws go dey devilish i believe they are working with their daughter, they didnt communicate this with the guy and family even in the sit together before bride price,they stretch hand collect bride price make the problem shift to another man house instead of solving it from start,.... |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Oyindidi(f): 11:25am On Nov 23, 2017 |
Xmen149:I don't think they are married. They are just living together. It's a common practice here in Rivers States |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Medicineguy: 11:27am On Nov 23, 2017 |
eodavids:Best Comment |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by MissRaine69(f): 11:28am On Nov 23, 2017 |
ray121:The pit of you need to sit down and have a frank honest discussion. She needs to know that the conversation is a deal breaker. If she lied her family is complacent too so that conversation needs to take place as well. The child knows no better but the adults in the child’s life do know the difference between right and wrong. |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by monlawal(m): 11:30am On Nov 23, 2017 |
Her mistake is that she did not consult you before using the surname. She thought you might object to using your name. Talk2Her it would go a long way |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Xmen149(m): 11:32am On Nov 23, 2017 |
Oyindidi: oh,.no wonder the WONDER WOMAN seems to be running the show.....both are swiming in potopoto let the dead bury the dead,.case closed |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Oyindidi(f): 11:33am On Nov 23, 2017 |
Xmen149:Lol, who is the dead in this story? |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by grandstar(m): 11:34am On Nov 23, 2017 |
ray121: Bring up the issue with your wife. Ask why she did that? Why didn't she use your name? The most important thing is to stay calm and not jump to conclusion. She might have reasons. Don't fret over it. Tell her you have her best interest at heart. That you feel it will be in the interest of her child that he bears your surname. If she believes keeping the the child's father's name is best, just ignore it. In time, she will come around or the child himself may demand he bears your name. Jeff Bezos, the richest man in the world and founder of Amazon bears his stepfathers name. His stepfather was the only dad he ever knew |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by after4: 11:35am On Nov 23, 2017 |
please try to consider the fact that the boy, when grown won't forget that someone trained him in school. people train other people who later forget them. I believe in the fact that what goes around comes around.God can still bless you for that act. remember if God don't bless you no man will. you are doing it for the boy not the woman. what if that boy becomes the only responsible child you have. forget the folly of women and touch alife.thanks as you decide |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Xmen149(m): 11:43am On Nov 23, 2017 |
Oyindidi: lol both,.the woman playing tinko-tinko and abrakatabra and the boy that does not know what he wants..this one if you tell am toilet is now sitting room he will put TV and stay there ...............but women dey over do oh,and ex told me she go won born pikin for me even as she is married,somthing to forever remind her of me i sick that day...............................women! |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Nobody: 11:44am On Nov 23, 2017 |
ray121:What the woman did is correct, cos you are not the father the earlier you accept that fact, the better. Just hv it in mind that your taking care of the child is scrafice and charity. Talk to her and be sure she is not seeing the other man and keep ur marraige safe n healthy |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by preetyb(f): 11:50am On Nov 23, 2017 |
Sir I will advice you leave things the way they are now because as long as that boy's father is still alive and doing well, the mother won't have inner peace until her baby papa acknowledges his son, and if the boy is already answering your name when that times comes, it will hurt you more because the boy the world used to know as your son is now answering a different surname and that will give you much more heartaches. Just let go of the name thing besides why do you even have to worry yourself about another man's son bearing your name when you have started having kids that will carry on your name. But if you feel bothered so much about it, have a talk with your wife but don't insist the boy should answer your name because the boy's father is still alive and even your wife will shock you when the tussel for the boy begins. Women reason like people on weed sometimes.. Smiles. |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Saintdaprince(m): 11:56am On Nov 23, 2017 |
The boy is not your son. So he should answer his dad's name not yours. Secondly, you have a daughter now, love your wife and daughter. Find things to do your them including the step son, don't do anything stupid because I won't waste time to pick you up and lock you inside the prison. Show the boy love. |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by willynilly87: 11:58am On Nov 23, 2017 |
Discuss it with her and let her tell u her reason. |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by mrsfavour(f): 11:58am On Nov 23, 2017 |
LadySarah:exactly, the thing is happening under 2 or 3 years ,how come sleeping with a woman who just gave birth and he could not know ? Already a wife to u,I don't think they die courtship. |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by Badgers14: 12:00pm On Nov 23, 2017 |
ray121: Glad you spoke up this early. If you love the kid and plan to be there all his life. Better go and adopt him officially and have the papers so the other dad won't stagger back to lay claim. In igbo land traditionally speaking, i should say in some customs in igbo land, paying the brideprice of the mother that is your wife automatically grants you custody of the boy. The saying is, you are marrying the woman and whatever comes along with it. One thing i want both you and every other person reading this to know is, if you are ever contemplating on marrying a single mother. This right here is the very first issue to tackle before moving ahead and you need to make your position green clear to the mother abi wife to be. This is because if you don't handle this issue very well, it results in heart break later on. Also try to understand who the real father is and the circumstances that led to the baby, were the two dating? Was she raped? Were they married? Where does the real father reside, where is he from? These will give you an insight on the battle ahead. Good luck. Happy Thanksgiving!!! 1 Like |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by sisisioge: 12:03pm On Nov 23, 2017 |
Well, he isn't your son...he is your step son. Biko let him bear his father's name regardless of what you do for him. Meanwhile, she has a less than two years old son, has a daughter for you....hmmm...the maths is kinda tricky....I used to love maths until it got so complex It is well. 1 Like |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by preetyb(f): 12:12pm On Nov 23, 2017 |
Afonjanightmare: Sir it is not a big deal for a young man to marry a young single mother. Did the lady impregnate herself? Is it Not a man like you that did that to her...it could have been any one of your love ones, so you would prefare your single mother sister get married to a man with kids or stay on unmarried than for a young man without kids get married to her?... She made a mistake of loving the wrong man and that is just it. If she could see the future she would not have been a victim of an irresponsible man. So please let the young man be afterall everyone cant think like you. |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by delishpot: 12:18pm On Nov 23, 2017 |
well, she can not name the child your name until he is officially adopted by you. so if you have chosen to be in his life, you must do so irrespective of his dad. |
Re: My Wife Had A Son For Another Man, What Should I Do? by engrchykae(m): 12:23pm On Nov 23, 2017 |
Nature is watching you and what will be your decision and action but i will advice you to be a great dad to the child,he might be brighter than your own blood. The gods have brought your blessing in a dirty package. Mark my words. |
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