I have heard lots of guys call babes that come to clean their house & cook for them unprintable names..Since then I vowed never to do aany of such till I get married. Thank God that I can do house chores so it doesn't seem like I am indolent, Besides, why should I wash your clothing??

steinacoz: God forbid, wot shud she be doing in M̶̲̥̅̊Ɣ house in the 1st place,M̶̲̥̅̊Ɣ church doctrine is against that...

If ur fiance Iڪ G̲̣̣̣̥o̲̣̥O̲̣̣̥ƌ̲̣̣̣̥, she Iڪ G̲̣̣̣̥o̲̣̥O̲̣̣̥ƌ̲̣̣̣̥...period

"Some say it‘s wrong because too much intimacy might breed iniquity."
exacty wat i mean.

nous: I am a lady and I think it is wrong and an act of desperation.
I know many people will abuse me and say all sorts of rubbish but I won't be offended because we are all entitled to our opinion.

your head dey there.

nous: I am a lady and I think it is wrong and an act of desperation.
I know many people will abuse me and say all sorts of rubbish but I won't be offended because we are all entitled to our opinion.

Well then, stay in your house and do a Church courtship with supervised visits. That is a good option if you want to avoid house chores. And I'm not in anyway demeaning that courtship process either.

But don't come to an African man's house during a weekend, and see the place in disarray and just settle down to watch TV and have s@x. That's definitely not a wife most men want to have.

OCTAVO: It is now gradually becoming a norm that ladies should do house chores for their fiance (all in the name of after all we are gonna get married soon).
I mean stuffs like sweeping the entire compound, cooking, washing clothes on visits and lots more.
Some say it‘s wrong because too much intimacy might breed iniquity.
Some say it‘s right cos you need to test-run the capability of your soon-to-be wife.
Why i personally don‘t like this is that some men (including their family members) misuse/abuse this privilege.
What‘s your own take?

The problem with most ladies is that they aren't romantic yet they seek romance, they want romance but they are too shy to spit it out, they are lazy yet seeking for hard working guys, and always complaining about this or that, don't do the chores and see another smart girl like you take the lead,if he has had a feel of your wet kitty cat and he spends on you, you are okay with that but the chores hell NO,RUBBISH....................................,Who ever will bully you will bully you married or not. Leave it or take it, dearie.

Nope!

Julieccentric: I have heard lots of guys call babes that come to clean their house & cook for them unprintable names..Since then I vowed never to do aany of such till I get married. Thank God that I can do house chores so it doesn't seem like I am indolent, Besides, why should I wash your clothing??

You definitely should not clean up for a guy you just met. That is desperate.

The topic refers to a fiance.

When you are in a loving relationship, if you are discerning, even when a guy has not proposed sef...you will know the relationship is likely heading towards marriage. At that point, it makes no sense to sit around watching plates pile up in the kitchen. Even if you don't want to do it alone, you can ginger the guy to come so you guys can do it together. Or tell him you got this, but he got that. That is love. My fiance usually gives me one chore to do while she does another...but she will never just come and relax in a dirty house. Sometimes I try to clean up before she comes to give her a pleasant surprise, just because i know she will not relax in a dirty house.

No guy makes fun of the girl he is going to marry cleaning his house...whats funny about that?

ypzilanti:

You definitely should not clean up for a guy you just met. That is desperate.

The topic refers to a fiance.

When you are in a loving relationship, if you are discerning, even when a guy has not proposed sef...you will know the relationship is likely heading towards marriage. At that point, it makes no sense to sit around watching plates pile up in the kitchen. Even if you don't want to do it alone, you can ginger the guy to come so you guys can do it together. Or tell him you got this, but he got that. That is love. My fiance usually gives me one chore to do while she does another...but she will never just come and relax in a dirty house. Sometimes I try to clean up before she comes to give her a pleasant surprise, just because i know she will not relax in a dirty house.

No guy makes fun of the girl he is going to marry cleaning his house...whats funny about that>

You sound responsible but trust me I know what I am talking ab
out.

Julieccentric:

You sound responsible but trust me I know what I am talking ab
out.

My dear am so sorry you are you are on the lane of the wrong guys run very fast now.

ypzilanti:

You definitely should not clean up for a guy you just met. That is desperate.

The topic refers to a fiance.

When you are in a loving relationship, if you are discerning, even when a guy has not proposed sef...you will know the relationship is likely heading towards marriage. At that point, it makes no sense to sit around watching plates pile up in the kitchen. Even if you don't want to do it alone, you can ginger the guy to come so you guys can do it together. Or tell him you got this, but he got that. That is love. My fiance usually gives me one chore to do while she does another...but she will never just come and relax in a dirty house. Sometimes I try to clean up before she comes to give her a pleasant surprise, just because i know she will not relax in a dirty house.

No guy makes fun of the girl he is going to marry cleaning his house...whats funny about that?

You are in the spirit

nous: I am a lady and I think it is wrong and an act of desperation.
I know many people will abuse me and say all sorts of rubbish but I won't be offended because we are all entitled to our opinion.

Sis, you are very correct. I dont do nothing in his house. The only day i moved the plates to the kitchen was the day he formally introduced me to his parents and the food was served by his mother so i couldnt leave the dishes for her to pack. (that was d day i entered their kitchen for the first time).

ypzilanti:

You definitely should not clean up for a guy you just met. That is desperate.

The topic refers to a fiance.

When you are in a loving relationship, if you are discerning, even when a guy has not proposed sef...you will know the relationship is likely heading towards marriage. At that point, it makes no sense to sit around watching plates pile up in the kitchen. Even if you don't want to do it alone, you can ginger the guy to come so you guys can do it together. Or tell him you got this, but he got that. That is love. My fiance usually gives me one chore to do while she does another...but she will never just come and relax in a dirty house. Sometimes I try to clean up before she comes to give her a pleasant surprise, just because i know she will not relax in a dirty house.

No guy makes fun of the girl he is going to marry cleaning his house...whats funny about that?

If you are not dirty why should you pile up plates and wait for your babe to come and clean it. What stops you from washing your plate after eating.
For ladies, I think it is a red flag when you see a guy piling chores for you to do. He will age you with chores and run after young girls (who wont do any chore for him)

the truth is dat most ppeople dat is against doin housse chores aint in a seriouss relationship yet.

i noticed dat even wen u are in love , u re free, u dont even allow anyone ask u to wash, clean, cook etc, it just happens,
before i make up my mind abt gettin married to a lady, i must have seen some qualities and her ability to manage and cclean my home in de future,

if u lazy about, dere wont be any word like "fianceé" between us.

rezzy:

Sis, you are very correct. I dont do nothing in his house. The only day i moved the plates to the kitchen was the day he formally introduced me to his parents and the food was served by his mother so i couldnt leave the dishes for her to pack. (that was d day i entered their kitchen for the first time).

Sorry o, let me get this right. Can you call someone your fiance(e),when his/her parents don't know about you?

Julieccentric:

You sound responsible but trust me I know what I am talking ab
out.

There are a lot of great guys out there. If you meet one and he cares about you, you could lose him by being petty about small things like house chores.

There are no hard and fast rules in love...we always make exceptions for people we love. To be honest, I never used to let women cook for me before I met my girl.
I'm a good cook and I would always cook for women I date. They would eat and say 'wow, you really can cook!'. I never counted it as a minus for them, but when I started dating my fiance, she forced her way into my kitchen and her food is better than mine. Soon I started looking forward to her cooking.

Konnektions146: the truth is dat most ppeople dat is against doin housse chores aint in a seriouss relationship yet.

i noticed dat even wen u are in love , u re free, u dont even allow anyone ask u to wash, clean, cook etc, it just happens,
before i make up my mind abt gettin married to a lady, i must have seen some qualities and her ability to manage and cclean my home in de future,

if u lazy about, dere wont be any word like "fianceé" between us.

Listen to yourself, what if she does all the cleaning & your neighbour refer to her as your wife even if you have not done the needful, she offends you one day, you get angry & that's the end of the relationship or courtship as acclaimed.

Abegeee...washing clothes or cooking your meal doesn't mean that she would be good enough for you.

nous:

If you are not dirty why should you pile up plates and wait for your babe to come and clean it. What stops you from washing your plate after eating.
For ladies, I think it is a red flag when you see a guy piling chores for you to do. He will age you with chores and run after young girls (who wont do any chore for him)

You are just lazy to think your fiance was siting down all week piling up plates for the sole reason to stress you to wash up for him. Cant believe a grown woman should be picking bones over plate washing. By all means if you guys can afford it, a house help will do the work inside marriage. Its attitude to house chores that most men are watching out for, anyway. Not the actual chores. and your attitude is dead wrong.

I dumped a girl early this year for similar reason. This lady opened the hole in her mouth to say "She can't fetch water in a home where her husband is" in her own words, her father and brother do fetch water in their house.

When she said this I was staunt, I have 24/7water gushing into my house and a gen to pump water to fill the overhead and underground tank for at least 5days after power outage. Of course if shouldn't have taken that statement serious because I always have water but I forsaw the future and unforseen circumstance and knew the girl wasn't just ready to marry.

A lady who when she enters my kitchen prepares only her food and will want me to practically beg to have some on my own food I bought with my money.

She has never lifted up the vacumn cleaner or broom to sweep any part of the house before.

All this I watched and didn't say anything. I dumped her for a lady about 8years her junior. When she found out, she wanted to run mad but she can't do anything. She went back to a guy she considered a "No go area". Due to spdesperation she had to settle for the guy. Someone she bullies and insults at will. She doesn't have an iota of love for the guy she is just desperate to marry because she is almost 30years.


Bottom line, a lady who isn't ready to be submissive to a man and do his chores if definitely not ready to get a husband.


Sefini.

Konnektions146: the truth is dat most ppeople dat is against doin housse chores aint in a seriouss relationship yet.

i noticed dat even wen u are in love , u re free, u dont even allow anyone ask u to wash, clean, cook etc, it just happens,
before i make up my mind abt gettin married to a lady, i must have seen some qualities and her ability to manage and cclean my home in de future,

if u lazy about, dere wont be any word like "fianceé" between us.

I am in a serious relationship. We know each other's parents. We have a mutual understanding about me not doing his house chores.

acidtalk: I dumbed a girl early this year for similar reason. This lady opened the hole in her mouth to say "She can't fetch water in a home where her husband is" in her own words, her father and brother do fetch water in their house.

When she said this I was staunt, I have 24/7water gushing into my house and a gen to pump water to fill the overhead and underground tank for at least 5days after power outage. Of course if shouldn't have taken that statement serious because I always have water but I forsaw the future and unforseen circumstance and knew the girl wasn't just ready to marry.

A lady who when she enters my kitchen prepares only her food and will want me to practically beg to have some on my own food I bought with my money.

She has never lifted up the vacumn cleaner or broom to sweep any part of the house before.

All this I watched and didn't say anything. I dumped her for a lady about 8years her junior. When she found out, she wanted to run mad but she can't do anything. She went back to a guy she considered a "No go area". Due to spdesperation she had to settle for the guy. Someone she bullies and insults at will. She doesn't have an iota of love for the guy she is just desperate to marry because she is almost 30years.


Bottom line, a lady who isn't ready to be submissive to a man and do his chores if definitely not ready to get a husband.


Sefini.

Exactly. Its the attitude that most men watch for. Most of the work is going to be done by paid house staff in most cases, anyway. But we think farther ahead...what if need arises tomorrow or there is no money? what happens?

We are helpmate,they re not our house maid,so guys let help dem sometimes we are less busy,trust me its kind of romance when u you help them,especially in the kitchen that u taste everything she's cooking.

treasureboy09:

My dear am so sorry you are you are on the lane of the wrong guys run very fast now.

Guy, read my earlier posts very well
cos I didn't mention that it was me..I have heard guys condemn their babes that do chores for them, abi u no get female friends?

nous:

I am in a serious relationship. We know each other's parents. We have a mutual understanding about me not doing his house chores.

That's good for you then. Do you also have an understanding that he is not responsible for your bills too? Is he happy with your attitude? Or you make all the rules?

Julieccentric:

Guy, read my earlier posts very well
cos I didn't mention that it was me..I have heard guys condemn their babes that do chores for them, abi u no get female friends?

babe the question is can you do it for your man? if no your guess is as good as mine.

ypzilanti:

You are just lazy to think your fiance was siting down all week piling up plates for the sole reason to stress you to wash up for him. Cant believe a grown woman should be picking bones over plate washing. By all means if you guys can afford it, a house help will do the work inside marriage. Its attitude to house chores that most men are watching out for, anyway. Not the actual chores. and your attitude is dead wrong.

I am not lazy. I do the chores in my house.

treasureboy09:

babe the question is can you do it for your man? if no your guess is as good as mine.

I would happily do it for my husband

nous:

I am in a serious relationship. We know each other's parents. We have a mutual understanding about me not doing his house chores.

come back next year and tell me he marries u rubbish she is even proud to say it out lazy bone

ypzilanti: r

Poster is looking for validation for her lazy nature. A fiance is someone you love and want to marry. He loves you and wants to marry you too. If you get to his house and see the place in a mess, what would you do? If there is no food in the kitchen nko? You want to sit around? Sit around. Just know he is probably going to kick you to the curb soon enough.

Just as most women would leave a man they think is not capable of taking care of them financially, most men would leave a woman they think is not capable of taking care of their home. When he is paying for your money needs, you do not say 'don't do that until we get married'.

Best post so far!!!

cupid4ig: come back next year and tell me he marries u rubbish she is even proud to say it out lazy bone

Why are you so perturbed??

ypzilanti:

That's good for you then. Do you also have an understanding that he is not responsible for your bills too? Is he happy with your attitude? Or you make all the rules?

Yes we have the understanding that he is not responsible for my bill. I was trained by my parents not to rely on a guy to pay my bills. He gets me gifts once in a while but he does not pay my bills. He is not my husband, so he should not pay my biils.
I am even skeptical of guys that try to buy my love by paying my bills. I run away from such guys.
We love each other for who we are, not because I can do chores or because he pays my bills.

nous: I am a lady and I think it is wrong and an act of desperation.
I know many people will abuse me and say all sorts of rubbish but I won't be offended because we are all entitled to our opinion.

guess u are still in your early 20s when you are 28 or 30s and no one to marry you,u can come back for advice

cupid4ig: come back next year and tell me he marries u rubbish she is even proud to say it out lazy bone

Dont worry I will even invite you for the wedding.