nous:

Yes we have the understanding that he is not responsible for my bill. I was trained by my parents not to rely on a guy to pay my bills. He gets me gifts once in a while but he does not pay my bills. He is not my husband, so he should not pay my biils.
I am even skeptical of guys that try to buy my love by paying my bills. I run away from such guys.
We love each other for who we are, not because I can do chores or because he pays my bills.

Nice one...all the best dearie

most of this girls saying they won't do such things here some times I wish ur future husbands will see all ur comments here on nairaland. When u need money u will ask him but u can't do his chores well no problem but when another girl start doing his chores post don't run to nairaland to start a topic why do guys cheat and double date.

bayulll01:
guess u are still in your early 20s when you are 28 or 30s and no one to marry you,u can come back for advice

I cannot date just any guy, so even if I am 30 I will choose well because for me marriage is a long term contract where divorce is not an option.

nous:
Dont worry I will even invite you for the wedding.

it depends on where the wedding will be cos u will pay for my flight

nous: I am a lady and I think it is wrong and an act of desperation.
I know many people will abuse me and say all sorts of rubbish but I won't be offended because we are all entitled to our opinion.

if you feel it is wrong to do house chores for your fiance, then it shouldn't be a problem if he doesnt spend a dime on you abi?

nous:

Yes we have the understanding that he is not responsible for my bill. I was trained by my parents not to rely on a guy to pay my bills. He gets me gifts once in a while but he does not pay my bills. He is not my husband, so he should not pay my biils.
I am even skeptical of guys that try to buy my love by paying my bills. I run away from such guys.
We love each other for who we are, not because I can do chores or because he pays my bills.

Anyway, you will get wiser as you get older. Some wisdom only comes with time.

From your responses I deduce that you and your boyfriend are young and not ready for marriage yet.

Even Oyibo 'woman activist' that I once dated surprised me with cooked meals two years into the relationship...

A normal woman in love, will want to cook for her lover. It is biological.

Foolish question.give without expecting anytin in return.

Julieccentric: I have heard lots of guys call babes that come to clean their house & cook for them unprintable names..Since then I vowed never to do aany of such till I get married. Thank God that I can do house chores so it doesn't seem like I am indolent, Besides, why should I wash your clothing??

i ve also seen girl that call guys who spend on them unprintable names. So should i vow never to spend on any girl till i get married?

Moyola: Nope!

you shouldnt object when i give the answer 'nope' when i am asked if it is right to spend on my fiancee?

Some people here are confusing “husband“ with “fiance.“ that is all i can say for now.

caukerzee: you shouldnt object when i give the answer 'nope' when i am asked if it is right to spend on my fiancee?

That is the women we have now,oh. If you see a good one, propose sharp sharp. What ever good you are seeing now will double as soon as you propose, and be unquantifiable once you marry her.

A woman that will take good care of you for the sake of love.

Most women now just want to receive without giving anything. They are loveless and unlovable, but want men to be convinced that once you take them to the altar, some magic will happen, and then they will become all that they were not during courtship.

If that is so, go find a drunk, stingy, woman beater who promises that he will become the best husband in the world once he marries you. have an 'understanding' with him that he owes you nothing until marriage day. Good luck with that.

omotola1: Some people here are confusing “husband“ with “fiance.“ that is all i can say for now.

Yeah, while others confuse "fiance" with "boyfriend".

Nuezha: Before nko?!
Where's the abuse there and what manner of fiance still stays with parents...
So long there's no s.ex, she's home free. Those things are fun really. Both party are at their heights of pretence - NEAR PERFECT COUPLES!

you want to tell me a girl will stay with his fiance without sex. For how long. Never

nous:
I cannot date just any guy, so even if I am 30 I will choose well because for me marriage is a long term contract where divorce is not an option.

my dear i applaude you for this. I want to enjoy my marriage and not just answer mrs.

Nothing wrong in doing home chores, that's at my spare time....why not? ....no big deal.....but funny, I hardly have a spare time .....but av mapped out my tight schedule, that when am married, I will do home chores.....if I don't do it , who will...?

That you do all the house chores does not guarantee ur been his Mrs and if you finally become one it doesn't guarantee his 100% faithfulness. Girls/women pls build ur home.

nous: I am a lady and I think it is wrong and an act of desperation.
I know many people will abuse me and say all sorts of rubbish but I won't be offended because we are all entitled to our opinion.

Abi o thank u my sister...sweep d compound 2? Wat kinda housegrl job z dat? Personally I'm very neat n I can't stand untidiness but y turn myself in2 a househelp? I could get sm1 2 clean d compound n i'l probably do d dishes n put his clothes in d washin machine...dats if I know hez been very busy n ddnt have time 2 clean up. We do it together if hez around, I will never clean a man's mess while he sits sround n watches tv, never! U can be rest assured dat hez gonna mess it up again n wait 4u 2 clean up cuz uve turned it into ur pry assignment.

nneh1: That you do all the house chores does not guarantee ur been his Mrs and if you finally become one it doesn't guarantee his 100% faithfulness. Girls/women pls build ur home.

In a relationship, there are no guarantees...you just do your best. If it does not work, you shed your tears and move on. Either that, or you try arranged marriages...your pastor or your village can help you in that regards.

But like play like play, av been the only one doing the home chores in our house of three boys and am the only girl... ....it's become part of me, though....that's why my brothers will always fold their arms and legs , watching tv, while I cook after coming back from work.... Am used to it... It's no big deal.... It's a wifey chores to do it, in her home... The men ain't doing it... So which means the house will be smelly then?...yuck...I hate smelly houses...no big deal in cleaning.

Gaiden k: No you shouldn't. marry him neither. When he marries another gal who got his attention by doing this lil things u ll still come back here and start another thread "he dumped me for another gal because of house chores",then posters like mrs chima and the other small gals will come and tell u how he aint worth it and find another opportunity to bash Naija men, face it "we are Africans" we hv got culture. You still got the option of going to the convent.

Maximumly seconded!

djeezy: And what about the women who do this chores under false pretence and the moment they are married they start to deviate. I'm not totally against women doing the chores for their fiance as that's how a man is going to find out if she's a wife material or not. Notwithstanding some people abuse this priviledge as aptly pointed out by the op, and to all intents and purposes I do not think it's sufficient enough in strictu sensu to abolish this process. It is by all odds sacrosanct.

So u think is ok if doing this is abused in marriage?

omotola1: Some people here are confusing “husband“ with “fiance.“ that is all i can say for now.

Want to hear what you've to say.

Born 2be Rich: The fiance and fiancee should do the house chores together...That will bring in more bonding between them but if only the woman does all the work and the man is relaxing and watching football then i will call it BONDAGE.

is that what u call bondage, when the man was busy doing his part by providing the basics, and ensuring adequate care was that reponsibility shared together with his fiancee?:/

Joey82: It amazes the kinda questions asked about relationship these days.
we got so called lovers trying to use their head too much thereby creating a wrong impression abt who they really are.
ok, u dont want to do the house chores but u want the man to send u money for hair do, replace ur worn out phone, worst of all have s*x with u.
if u wont assume any responsibility as a woman, dont also expect the man to.

Don't mind them. A lot of these edeeots complaining about doing chores will give all they have to do it only if they can land a fiance. But the proplem is that they aint gat and can never have. They will die single.

it all depends on if you feel like it>>> never do it to please no man

Joey82:
well if been responsible means some form of payback to you then i mean so.
keep shaking ur head.
if a woman cant do these little things in a r/ship, what else can she do.
Do u expect me to cook for her any time she visits?
or sleep while i scrub the floor and tidy the kitchen?
come on man, been doing all that in her absence and if i'll be doing it while she's around, what's the use of her been around?

My guy, u are on point!

I don't think there's much of a big deal in it, so long as you have an understanding fiance. You seriously don't expect a man who will marry you in say, 6 months to always take you to eateries every time you visit. Cooking for him should even be a thing of joy. If you feel he's taking advantage of that, you can politely tell him to help out or just hang around and gist with you. It creates time for bonding. Trust me, no reasonable man will want to settle with a fake girl that only cares about her nails and Brazillian hair. Matured ladies know what to do to make their men happy. True love is not selective. Its high time ladies learnt that when a man loves you, there's no point trying to prove any useless point. If you love him truly, you will go out of your way to make him happy. You stand to gain more when you love and respect a man without nagging or arguing. However, everyone is entitled to their opinions.

Sleek05:

Abi o thank u my sister...sweep d compound 2? Wat kinda housegrl job z dat? Personally I'm very neat n I can't stand untidiness but y turn myself in2 a househelp? I could get sm1 2 clean d compound n i'l probably do d dishes n put his clothes in d washin machine...dats if I know hez been very busy n ddnt have time 2 clean up. We do it together if hez around, I will never clean a man's mess while he sits sround n watches tv, never! U can be rest assured dat hez gonna mess it up again n wait 4u 2 clean up cuz uve turned it into ur pry assignment.

THIS IS ALL F**KED UP. SO IT IS TRUE! SO MANY WOMEN AROUND BUT NO ONE SUITABLE FOR MARRIAGE. SH*T!

Bibol: I don't think there's much of a big deal in it, so long as you have an understanding fiance. You seriously don't expect a man who will marry you in say, 6 months to always take you to eateries every time you visit. Cooking for him should even be a thing of joy. If you feel he's taking advantage of that, you can politely tell him to help out or just hang around and gist with you. It creates time for bonding. Trust me, no reasonable man will want to settle with a fake girl that only cares about her nails and Brazillian hair. Matured ladies know what to do to make their men happy. True love is not selective. Its high time ladies learnt that when a man loves you, there's no point trying to prove any useless point. If you love him truly, you will go out of your way to make him happy. You stand to gain more when you love and respect a man without nagging or arguing. However, everyone is entitled to their opinions.

My point exactly. What useless household chore point are you trying to prove to your future husband?

'I will have s@x with you, spend your money, but don't expect me to assist you with your house chores. I don't roll like that'.

That does not sound like a life partner to me. That sounds like the women I was screwwwing in University.

If U̶̲̥̅̊ Ƌõñŧ do ïŧ,another well trained girl will do ïŧ cuz she is responsible..ŵƕăŧ did U̶̲̥̅̊ girls thinks α̲̅ man ι̥
ọ̥
ọ̥
κ̣̝̇
out ƒσя b4 decided to marry U̶̲̥̅̊? Ђ☺̣̣̥̇W̶̲̥̅̊ would U̶̲̥̅̊ convince him dat U̶̲̥̅̊ will do chores after marriage? No wonder vast majority girls @ 30s still remains spinsters? Only †ђξ wise among U̶̲̥̅̊ marries at †ђξ right time..naija ŵȇ get culture dat y ℓ̊ like some yorubas..@30s still searching mtcheeeeew..

Joey82:
well if been responsible means some form of payback to you then i mean so.
keep shaking ur head.
if a woman cant do these little things in a r/ship, what else can she do.
Do u expect me to cook for her any time she visits?
or sleep while i scrub the floor and tidy the kitchen?
come on man, been doing all that in her absence and if i'll be doing it while she's around, what's the use of her been around?

God bless you for that insightful Comment. Kini Big Deal gan!

Bibol: I don't think there's much of a big deal in it, so long as you have an understanding fiance. You seriously don't expect a man who will marry you in say, 6 months to always take you to eateries every time you visit. Cooking for him should even be a thing of joy. If you feel he's taking advantage of that, you can politely tell him to help out or just hang around and gist with you. It creates time for bonding. Trust me, no reasonable man will want to settle with a fake girl that only cares about her nails and Brazillian hair. Matured ladies know what to do to make their men happy. True love is not selective. Its high time ladies learnt that when a man loves you, there's no point trying to prove any useless point. If you love him truly, you will go out of your way to make him happy. You stand to gain more when you love and respect a man without nagging or arguing. However, everyone is entitled to their opinions.

NICE ONE THERE. JUST RE_INSTATED MY BELIEF IN NAINJA WOMEN FOR NOW. AT LEAST NOT ALL OF THEM ARE SO FULL OF SH**T. HATS OFF TO U.