The rock5555: Typing new update....

waiting patiently

After all this while of keeping mute,i have to voice out
Mehn u re gud but u ave to take note of some grammatical errors but all d same
U GOOD DIE

I am feeling u big time

The rock5555:

Lol, ministry ke.

That means all the female members must carry belly

LOL.al join na.na ur own way of movin d ministry[2 add population]God sef talk say make we go into d world nd multiply

"Daddy, i go soon dey hammer money"

I shouted in excitement to him when he came back home that evening.

"How would you start getting money, or have you won lotto" he joked.

"No, i would become a footballer very soon and would start sending for all of you money".

He looked at me and went inside without saying a word, i was scared but i just passed it on as normal thing.

After dinner i was about going to sleep when he called me back, gan, gan, i knew my time was set so i waited for everyone to go inside then he asked me a thunder bolt question.

"What do you want to be in future"

shit, i had not expect that question but what concern my future ambition and making money.

"Ehmm, doctor" i starmered.

"Good" he said and that was how my blasting started.

"Do you know that if you are a footballer your career is short while you could be a doctor forever"

"Do you know that if a footballer gets injured he has to be treated by a doctor"

He kept on blasting me till tears filled my eyes and i felt like slaming his mouth at that moment.

The next day i slept at home with out going any where and even when my friens came to call me for the charity match i told them i was sick and they left me alone.

I looked from our house and saw them playing and screaming wildly while more tears flowed.

Some of them were given sponsorship abroads and some are now playing in the nigerian premier league, maybe some are still plying their trade in china premier league nor do i care.

Atleast if say i follow them una for dey watch me for television playing for manchester united football club as their gate man and una no for hear my story.

Monday reach and i have already forgotten about the football issue, the only thing on my mind was Joy, match parade and hand ball practice.

Truth was i had been removed from the parade but since they never knew the number of students that were going to participate i concluded on going there again.

"Stand stil for the natinal anthem"

The head boy shouted on the assembly ground and i grinned when i remembered how i said item and collected 10lashes.

We went to class with my hands holding Joy ofcourse because her elder brother was looking at our direction and i never wanted stories that touch.

"Where is your government assignment" my sugar mummy asked me.

This babe is too possesive, she is not even doing her assignments she is waiting for me to bring mine and she even gave me to copy it for her like she was a leper.

"Why is your mark higher than my own" she screamed at me when our note books was given back to us.

"You don forget the saying, monkey dey work and baboon dey chop, it wont happen for me at all" i said with a little fear of the unkown.

I was suprised at her behaviour because she just frowned her face and was almost crying.

Chai, see this girl that is dealing with, so she use to feel pain sef, bros you too much, you mouth na helele. I praised myself but i saw her brother coming to our class at that moment.

I was confused and i looked at her and it seemed like she also saw him because she started crying one useless cry.

I did not wait for the dude to catch me because i set my nitro speed on and i was about fleeing when she grabbed my trousers pulled me hard, i heard.

"Praaah"

I did not even care as i heard people laughing, i just ran past her astonished brother and zoomed to the field where students were already gathering for practice.

Every body were looking at me and laughing and i wondered why when i saw a boy point at my bottom and i placed my hand there.
"Chineke meh" i shouted.
*****************************
"Left, right, left, right, forward match. One, two. Left right, about turn" the soldier instructor kept screaming out instructions at us while we performed his wishes without hitches.

I looked at her as her group passed me and we smiled at each other and continued matching.

After the match parade i went to wash my body in the stream nearby when she came and sat near to me.

"Thanks for helping me senior" i told her and she smiled and said no problem.

"Which class are you" she asked me and i told her while she said she was in ss3 which i already knew.

I was about asking her for her name shyly but my eye caught something and i looked to see that devillish damsel and her two macho brothers standing afar watching us.

The look on their faced can be used for the cover photo of olamide's hit song-BOYS ARE NOT SMILING.

I forgot every thing i wanted saying to the girl near me and i ran like oliver twist to go and recieve my purnishment.

My mind was beating like a lokomotive engine and when i got near Joy gave me a warning finger which i translate as 'today you must enter grave' and i mentally started digging my grave in anticipation of my glorious entry to heaven or so i thought.

********TO BE CONTINUED******

Aleeyouchalawa: [b][/b]Oooooo BOY I really really feel this write up.....mehnnnn I was reading ur thread since day b4 ystdy nd I feel so good I was in boredom mood, buh now am feelin kinder awesome, am so addicted 2 ur story keep it up, and thanks so much 4 it.....

Thank u too for reading bumper to bumper

lekinz: After all this while of keeping mute,i have to voice out
Mehn u re gud but u ave to take note of some grammatical errors but all d same
U GOOD DIE

dat have been taken care of, thanks for d observation

Joizy: LOL.al join na.na ur own way of movin d ministry[2 add population]God sef talk say make we go into d world nd multiply

kekekekekekeke- i laugh in chinese

This last update got me cracking my ribs.I think i need new ones.

Daniel2802: This last update got me cracking my ribs.I think i need new ones.

i dey walk for mortaury, i fit steal one dude own replace am 4 u

Just dial my number- 080iwandie

buhahaha...that's a very funny update, continue dz way abeg, you're on top bro!

Why na? I want to c them giv u the beating u deserve

lola_bridget: Why na? I want to c them giv u the beating u deserve

Y una like make dem dey beat me na

For not supplying una wella today i must produce two updates before i sleep.

Typing......

For GOD ALMIGHTY so loved the world that He sent His
Son Jesus to die for our
sins and take the penalty
for us. If we believe in Him
as our Savior, He washes
us clean from all our sin
and gives us eternal life.
"He who believes in the Son
has everlasting life; and he
who does not believe the
Son shall not see life, but
the wrath of God abides on
him." (John 3:36)
So, after hearing God's
Word here today... Do you
believe?
Eternal life is a gift
purchased by the blood of
Jesus and offered freely to
those who put their faith in
Him.
My brothers & sisters, pls flee from sin.

Dis one u dey attract gals wella, seems like u wia a very young handsome dude

martin92: Dis one u dey attract gals wella, seems like u wia a very young handsome dude

dude nt al galz go afta a gui kos he's hans...u neva c atutupoyoyo date fyn babes even if e no gt doe

Wetin i go do now, i thought as i ran to Joy and her brothers direction, mtcheww, i slowed down to a walk but when i got near i actually saw joy trembling and i got scared the more.

"What happened between you two the eldest brother asked me"

"Me and who" i asked innoncently.

"The girl with you at the stream"

"Ow that one, she is my sister" i said a fat lie.

They saw me still tying a jacket round my waist and they asked me who had it and i remembered that i was given by that senior which i never asked her name then the event earlier crossed my mind and i smiled.

"Senior its your sister that caused it"

That moment joy started shaking and i smiled within me.

"How did my sister cause it"the younger dude asked.

This was my only chance to form a fat lie and put Joy in trouble so i did not disappoint.

"Senior i was jogging round the school when your sister used a nail to tear my trouser and boxers because she said i was making noise"

Joy was so shocked to hear my expensive lie but before she could open her mouth she recieved a hot slap that could make osama bin laden deaf.

"Bros, sorry my sister sabi find trouble some times, we come call you for handball practice"

So na to come call me nai they come carry face like garri drinkers, nansense.

I went with them while Joy followed us behind like a gentle girl while trying to sniff back tears-good for you, i thought in my mind.

After the practice Joy came and apologized while her brothers gave me money to sew my trousers, if say dem know say tailor for my area dey chiek my sister you for no give me money, i thought happily as i pocketed the money and my mind wondered to the disgraceful event that happened to me during the matching practice.

I had ran to the field like Usain bolt and i was feeling some fresh air on my bare buttocks and i wondered if an AC circuit had been connected to my ar'se.

I let the idea pass untill some students were pointing at me and laughing, i did not mind them untill i saw a boy pointing at my bottom and i touch it to see that both my trouser and boxer were torned at my ar'se.

I felt like falling into a open ground but non refuse to open so i held my trouser tight with my hands before a female senior came and covered me with her jacket.

I laughed at the whole incident, sha no be Joy fault say the trouser tear because i was a legend in polluting then, i could use my mess and sing national (item) or so i thought.

"So are you through with your practice" a female voice startled me as i saw my sweater saviour standing outside a compound near the school which i assumed to be her house.

"Yes am through" i answered shyly, and thanks for the jacket.

"Ow, forget that abeg, its just small matter, why dont you come inside and eat"

Me eat for person house say who die, person wey i no know her name sef.

"Em thank you senior"

"My name is not senior, its elvelyn so when you see me outside school just call me that" she smiled at me before escourting me alittle before going back home.

Mehn this senior package arrange , she was an idoma girl with large bust and backyard but her face was where pimples usually come for area conference but if the cut off her head am sure i could bleep her anyday or time but that could only in my dream or so i thought.

"So when would you come and visit me" she said when she was about going back.

"I dont know, senior i mean evelyn"

"Cant you come in the night"

Chineke, night keh, my papa go lock me for house forever be that but i did not want to fall my hands in this once in a life time oppourtunity so i also formed dirty big boy.

"I can come anything who want" i said with a trembling heart and praying that God would make her say an early time but i was dissappointed.

"Can you come by 9pm on friday"

"Yes senior". But wait o i knew that my mouth said no but what came out was yes, till today i dont know what happened to me.

"Ok i would be waiting" she said as she turned and walked back.

I wanted to say waiting for what but that would sound silly and bilittle me so just miserable turned and walked home, i even gave my running mouth a hot slap.

I got home and i took my trousers to the tiv tailor who wanted to date my sister or so he thought.

"oga tailor good afternoon" i greeted.

He looked at me and smiled, so how is your sister? This man no dey tire for woman abi- tiv men and women sef.

"Fine sir, she send me this letter also" i gave him a letter which i wrote enough love quotes to make a dude go gaga at the end i put, i would need 500 naira pls.

The man was so please that he sewed my trouser and gave me 500naira for my so-called sister and 200naira for me the mr messenger.

I went home that day 700naira richer not knowing i had used my hands to buy trouble.

*******TO BE CONTINUED*******

Wetin i go do now, i thought as i ran to Joy and her brothers direction, mtcheww, i slowed down to a walk but when i got near i actually saw joy trembling and i got scared the more.

"What happened between you two the eldest brother asked me"

"Me and who" i asked innoncently.

"The girl with you at the stream"

"Ow that one, she is my sister" i said a fat lie.

They saw me still tying a jacket round my waist and they asked me who had it and i remembered that i was given by that senior which i never asked her name then the event earlier crossed my mind and i smiled.

"Senior its your sister that caused it"

That moment joy started shaking and i smiled within me.

"How did my sister cause it"the younger dude asked.

This was my only chance to form a fat lie and put Joy in trouble so i did not disappoint.

"Senior i was jogging round the school when your sister used a nail to tear my trouser and boxers because she said i was making noise"

Joy was so shocked to hear my expensive lie but before she could open her mouth she recieved a hot slap that could make osama bin laden deaf.

"Bros, sorry my sister sabi find trouble some times, we come call you for handball practice"

So na to come call me nai they come carry face like garri drinkers, nansense.

I went with them while Joy followed us behind like a gentle girl while trying to sniff back tears-good for you, i thought in my mind.

After the practice Joy came and apologized while her brothers gave me money to sew my trousers, if say dem know say tailor for my area dey chiek my sister you for no give me money, i thought happily as i pocketed the money and my mind wondered to the disgraceful event that happened to me during the matching practice.

I had ran to the field like Usain bolt and i was feeling some fresh air on my bare buttocks and i wondered if an AC circuit had been connected to my ar'se.

I let the idea pass untill some students were pointing at me and laughing, i did not mind them untill i saw a boy pointing at my bottom and i touch it to see that both my trouser and boxer were torned at my ar'se.

I felt like falling into a open ground but non refuse to open so i held my trouser tight with my hands before a female senior came and covered me with her jacket.

I laughed at the whole incident, sha no be Joy fault say the trouser tear because i was a legend in polluting then, i could use my mess and sing national (item) or so i thought.

"So are you through with your practice" a female voice startled me as i saw my sweater saviour standing outside a compound near the school which i assumed to be her house.

"Yes am through" i answered shyly, and thanks for the jacket.

"Ow, forget that abeg, its just small matter, why dont you come inside and eat"

Me eat for person house say who die, person wey i no know her name sef.

"Em thank you senior"

"My name is not senior, its elvelyn so when you see me outside school just call me that" she smiled at me before escourting me alittle before going back home.

Mehn this senior package arrange , she was an idoma girl with large bust and backyard but her face was where pimples usually come for area conference but if the cut off her head am sure i could bleep her anyday or time but that could only in my dream or so i thought.

"So when would you come and visit me" she said when she was about going back.

"I dont know, senior i mean evelyn"

"Cant you come in the night"

Chineke, night keh, my papa go lock me for house forever be that but i did not want to fall my hands in this once in a life time oppourtunity so i also formed dirty big boy.

"I can come anything who want" i said with a trembling heart and praying that God would make her say an early time but i was dissappointed.

"Can you come by 9pm on friday"

"Yes senior". But wait o i knew that my mouth said no but what came out was yes, till today i dont know what happened to me.

"Ok i would be waiting" she said as she turned and walked back.

I wanted to say waiting for what but that would sound silly and bilittle me so just miserable turned and walked home, i even gave my running mouth a hot slap.

I got home and i took my trousers to the tiv tailor who wanted to date my sister or so he thought.

"oga tailor good afternoon" i greeted.

He looked at me and smiled, so how is your sister? This man no dey tire for woman abi- tiv men and women sef.

"Fine sir, she send me this letter also" i gave him a letter which i wrote enough love quotes to make a dude go gaga at the end i put, i would need 500 naira pls.

The man was so please that he sewed my trouser and gave me 500naira for my so-called sister and 200naira for me the mr messenger.

I went home that day 700naira richer not knowing i had used my hands to buy trouble.

*******TO BE CONTINUED*******

Double update

dt shld b a mistake or maib internet error

I no go lie, tinz wey dey my mind.. wen i see u bleeping guy u got me high

My network is so fuccking bad this nite, its not even agreeing to load, i would kip on try sha. Devil na liar

Typing 2nd update... Lets pray network allow me sha...

NETWORK abeg allow dis dude 2 update dis nah..plzzzzzzzzzzz abeg

The rock5555: Typing 2nd update... Lets pray network allow me sha...

I went and buy enough goodies which i took to my original babe and we ate before i went to the field and trained.

I and my sister were sent to buy some stuffs that evening and the shop we were supposed to go to we had to pass the tailor's shop first.

I was expecting the shop to be closed but when i saw light shining inside i knew that there was trouble.

I had to think fast and i quickly overtook my sister and went pass the shop as not to be caught in the cross fire i started earlier.

I passed the man and walked even faster untill my sister came near his shop and he saw her.

Am sure his mind told him that my sister had come for him because as soon as he came out, he tried embracing her.

"Tawah"

That was how the slap that my sister gave him sounded and i felt pity for the poor man.

As a nigerian man he was not ready to forfiet his money because he grabbed her wrist and they were arguing.

"My friend leave me alone before i add another slap on your black ugly face" my sister threatened

"So you want to chop my money and go like you dont know me abi"

"What money, are you mad or did i send you to give me any money"

"So the money i gave to your broher, where is it, abi are you not the one that sent a love letter to me?" he shouted.

Chineke meh, my heart jumped into my mouth and i tried not to bite it while pushing it back.

"I did not send my brother anything".

That moment i felt it was time to clearify issues once and for all, so i walked up to them and asked what the problem was.

The man looked at me like he wanted to eat me,"No be you i give money after you bring letter for me to go and give your sister"

"Oga which time na, i never comot throughout today, ask my sister na, maybe na person wey resemble me" i lied.

The man looked at me confusedly and just left my sister without saying a word.

"I know say na you do that thing, see you bad boy" my sister joked at me as we left the scence of my crime.

If anybody was good enough to read my character, my sister would be the one because she understand me even when am about to do something.

I gave her 200naira from the money and we went to buy our stuffs and passed by the woman wrapper shop while he looked at us like he could murder us with his eyes.

How was i going to visit this girl called evelyn now, i thought long and hard but no idea came to my mind untill i went to school and consulted my friend julian.

The boy laughed at me and i thought he was mocking me but he became serious and he told me he had a very good idea but it was under one condition.

"Guy, you go find for me babe, so that me self go dey hit her big while you carry your own"

The idea made sense so i told senior evelyn about it and she said i should not worry because she would invite her friend over that day.

Now back to the plan, Julian came to my house on friday afternoon and informed my parents that he was taking me for a special night vigil programme in hs church and he begged them to allow me go.

My father looked at him with searching eyes like he wanted him to spill his guts before allowing him to go, but he found out the name of Julian's church incase of anything.

"Guy that your lie gbam, see as they all believe immediately" i said as we shook ourselves while we went downstairs.

"Me na bad guy na, igbo man no dey carry last at all you know"

We parted ways while my mind kept wondering anxiously for that day to come.

The d-day finally arrived and he came to my house witha big bible while i dressed up excitedly and followed him, but in my haste we forgot his bible neither did i take mine.

"Guy, we no carry the bible again", i said with fear but he told me not to worry that no-one would know.

We went to evelyn's house and we met another damsel who introduced herself as blessing to us and i sat down slowly.

My heart was pounding and i began getting scared because that was the first time i ever left my parents house without anyone knowing where i was going.

Many thoughts ran through my mind as i felt that what if we were kidnap or slaughtered there, no-one who ever find us and a cold chilly feeling made me shiver, i turned to look at Julian but the dude was already engrossed in discussion with blessing and so i waited with my eyes darting to the clock every minute.

All my fears disappeared when Evelyn walk in wearing a bum short and a singlet while her twin towers bugged out and were crying for mercy to be freed, she was carrying plates of steaming jollof rice but my eyes were only fixed on her own body while my mouth dried up and my JT began waking up from sleep.

"Close your mouth jare before fly enter" she tease while i got myself and rearrange my trouser well while she must have noticed it and she just laughed and said 'dont worry, its time is coming very soon' but eat first because you both would need the strenght.

Damn,MISSION IN PROGRESS.

TO BE CONTINUED.....