Typing new updates...

Motocycle speed activated...

Waiting jawe

I dey kamkpe

Foxy_Flow:

You are not supposed to quote me. I know what I am saying dude. Just chillax

Oga sir mbok, no vex

The rock5555:

Oga sir mbok, no vex

Guy no lemme ves for u o!! UPDATE NA!!

Mehn.....So i dn miss......Internet gud ooooo....Sha do quick before i vex naw....Abi make i give u my own sandal?

@rita,i am jealous oh.

THE BACKLASH
************
"See una chairman dey wear undersize shoe with white leg"

All eyes went to my white legs. I felt like entering the ground but i composed myself and started talking when Anita placed her hands on my wrist reassuringly.

"We have gathered her today to witness our celebrant hit another milestone in her life, blah, blah, blah"

By the time i was through the whole crowd began clapping, chai i suppose be president of naija jare, i composed myself well that day.

I ended the speech by saying 'as a pastor's son i have trekked from Northbank to this place to witness this great occasion, my white legs were symbol of trekking and the white legs was sign of lack of vaseline in my house".

The whole crowd bursted into laughter due to my last statement the claps were deafening, i just smiled and sat down, my eyes went to Anita's friends who were admiring my courage, Idowu was also smiling like he ate cat meat.

The low waist boy was bonning furouisly while shaking a warning finger at me.

"Whats with you and that boy?"

Anita asked me but i just waved it off as normal fued, she did not ask me again.

There was lot of dances and other competition, the height of it was when the chairman and chairlady were asked to perform a head hold competition.

A ballon was placed on infront of our foreheads which we held in place and walked to a set location, the first group that crossed the finish line won.

I was so shy, she had on a three inche stillote shoes while i was wearing a 36 and half undersize shoe.

It was more like a rich girl and pauper show, some people were laughing maybe at me, i dont know.

We won and she embraced me before we went to our seats, i was on dream mode because i never believed what uche Jombo was doing for poor Jim Iyke in a naija movie was going to be acted by me.

The huge amount of food that was placed before me was stupencious, i almost grabbed the chicken lap immediately but one look from Anita quenched my hunger or would i say greed.

I was asked to pray for the Item 7, you need to see how i was rapping like lil wanye in the name of praying.

"This our chairman must be a future rapper in future" MC J announced after the prayer which made people laugh, even Anita teased me.

I wanted rushing my food but i maintained and ate slowly like i had all the time in the world.

Big man good jare.

"Can i have your phone number or should i put mine" Anita purred in my ears.

"I would like to continue this our friendship, you are fun to be with,my sister certainly did not lie about you" She continued.

My ears were jubilating at the sound that came out of her lips,my head almost exploded with flattery.

I manage to remove my phone which i pressed it close to my side to avoid her seeing it, it was bad that i did not know my number off head. Ever since those men of the under world robbed us i stopped learining numbers.

A week after that incident i went to a friend of mine who called the number to comfirm if it still existed.

The phone rang as i held it in anticipation to insult the supposed armedrobber that stole the phone.

"Hello, whose this"

"Sir this is my father's number, it was stolen a week ago"

"You must be stuid, do you know where i am?"

"Yes sir, you dey makurdi, you better bring that phone or i go call police o"

"Am in Abia and this is my number, you must be a drunk boy, you better get off this line and never call my line again"

The line went off as i began wondering how a phone that was stolen miss road reach Abia state. My small brain did not tell me that MTN produces the same sim to another user when ones number goes out of exitence.

I was smiling foolishly at my little sensibility then when Anita reached out and grabbed my phone before i came to my senses.

Heey, see fuckup jare, i was so ashamed because my phone which i used to be doing experiment had faded keys, the back cover was supported with paper and a rubber ring held them together.

"Your phone is cute"

See ironic statemnt abeg, let her just say another thing apart from praising my dead phone, i just smiled wirily. The smile disappeared when she daled her number in my phone.

"Sorry, your recharge card is too low for this call, please load a recharge card. Thank you" the stupid customer care machine spoke.

I wondered why that girl talking dont ever gets tired.

Anita just added my number to hers after a showed her and i quickly collect my phone and stood up in order to cover my embarrasment.

She wanted saying something but she left me as i gathered my siblings and friends to go.

They were busy malloping second round inside, i looked atmy sister who grinned wildly, after pressurising and threatening them with my dad name they all unwillingly got up and went with me.

I did not tell the celebrant family we were going,i just packed myself and them and started going but stopped in my tracks.

Low waist boy and his three guys were waiting for me with sticks in their hands.

To Be Continued..

Since i waste time too much make i start another update now.

Chai....dis one na embarrasment of d first order.....waitin patiently for d next update.....u @r@o@c@k

Waiting patiently for the next update.....drinking cold fanta bought by hacker

*looks sides weda daniel is around*

.....continue sipping...

guy no kip me waitin unda d *sun*.U beta pass me sum kunu nd popcorn make I dey cool my temper

Chai d rock u don die 2day, bt no wahala if dem try anytin jst alert me n i go show b4 dem crucify u.

Oga Rock. Ride on
superman dont need no seat belt

Now i'm finally here....

OBAGO.

Weldone my boss. I dey very busy sotey i no fit check nairaland sef.

And to oga hackerjay, i say thumbs up.

Hehehe....Uduak nawa 4 u oo.I op dar boy breakz ur head....Oooooshiii..Na u short,Get Bighead,dae alwyz entr trouble...Hu u resemble sef

Firstgentleman1: Now i'm finally here....

OBAGO.

Weldone my boss. I dey very busy sotey i no fit check nairaland sef.

And to oga hackerjay, i say thumbs up.

where u come go since wey i dey find you na.......

After threatening my siblings with my father's name and the talk of going home early they reluctantly rushed their food and carried the food which was given to them by the celebrant to give my elder sister and parents at home.

I opened it and took out one big piece of me, abi they wan try man must wack.

"Uduak na their mummy own" my sitser cried out, i gave her a bad eye which quickly shut her mouth.

I covered it and gave them back while munching mine. I hurried them out without informing the celebrant family, i was still feeling down casted due to what transpired between i and Anita.

We had walked a long distance and bent into a coner which hid us from the view of the house.

There we sighted the low waist boy who popped out from no-where with three of his friends, they all had big sticks in their hands. To say i was scared was an understatementi was practically shaking but i covered it up by just waving my hands like i was glorifying God.

My two younger sisters cling to me as i weighed my options while the dude began talking.

"So you think i have forgotten about our promise right, we i brought my three friends since you also have three, atleast let me test you guys strenght to see wether its what is making those babes fall for you.

You wan try barrack boys abi, you snatch our girls, you come be chairman for the occasion coupled with your white legs and slippers, you even had right to push me in my carban.

Una don die today, i go show una say barrack boys no dey carry last".

My mind immediately went into thinking mood as soon as they started walking bodly towards us. I remembered the style Jacob in the bible used when he had his brother Esua was coming with his troops, i quickly gave my brother the food flask and told him to shift my sisters backwards.

"Make that food no pour, even though them beat us and come drag the food you better protect am with your life" i warned him.

You may be suprise why i cherish food more than my life, man must wack dont jokes with food atall or so am thinking.

"Guy na us against them o" i spoke to Julian, Idowu and Kolo.

"Guy my belly don full o, and see as i dey lenge lenge, na with my fat head i wan use fight abi na my big belly" kolo complained and ran to go meet my siblings.

We were left with three against four as the barrack boys got closer. I thought that was all but my day got worse the more.

"Abeg me na only messi style i sabi for field, i no sabi fight o" Idowu shouted and ra to join Kolo and my siblings.

We were now two against four, they were bigger than us and they had weapons which meant one thing which was they would have a land slide victory over us.

I and Julian looked at ourselves and signaled only one thing which meant 'Guy run or die'. We folded our fists in trademark bruce lee style and waited for our downfall.

When they got nearer we quickly took to our heels which took them unawares, the other judas and my siblings also took to their heels.

My brother was holding the flask on his head and i smiled, the boy is a real protector of food.

A car light beamed at us from afar as the barrack boys came closer to us, i was dragging my kid sister along because she was too slow even though she boast of her long legs.

The car suddenly swirved in front of us and Jennifers father came out and the barrack boys screeched to a standstill. They almost turned back to fled but one word from the man brought them to a standstill.

"If you run i would fish you all out from your houses and deal with you"

"Why are you chasing this children, what have they done to you boys?"

"Oga major, na exercise we dey do we dey do with them" the low waist boy said out of breath.

"Exercise with sticks in your hands isnt"

"No sir, na winch appear am for our hands, i no know say i hold stick sef" they began throwing away their sticks like it was a disease to their skin.

"Oya down on your knees and wait her till i get back"

They quickly got down and kept quiet am sur they would stay like that till Anita's father comes back.

"Oya enter the car lets go, we were searching for you guys to take home but saw you had left, i wondered why you did not tell us first".

"Na my bro..." i quickly covered the miscreant mouth to stop talking make she no expose me.

We squeezed ourselfs into his pathfinder jeep and zoomed off,i was silent and still did not say a word to Anita. After dropping my friends he took us to our house and dropped us.

"Thank you sir"

"No problem, just greet your parents for me" the major said and we waved them before going inside.

Two messages beep on my phone, i opened one to see that two hundre had been transefered to me and the second just read 'i enjoyed your company, wish to see you again. Love'.

I dialled the number and saw that she saved her number as princess Anita in my phone. I quickly cut the call before it rang and began dancing awilo as my siblings looked at me amusingly not knowing that trouble waited for me upstairs.

To Be Cont...

"Gree

The rock5555:
@kingphilip-cont d story o, no die joor. Btw wetin be CACM

Still i ROCK

chop and clean mouth

ritababe:
make una warn dis bros make im no dey quote the whole writeup oh or else .....or else .....or else..........

u neva get moni buy the wrapa?

Vickie Zion: guy no kip me waitin unda d *sun*.U beta pass me sum kunu nd popcorn make I dey cool my temper

server her big popcorn and a chilled kunu

Next update by 10pm, abeg make i enter 2go, e don tey wey i land there.

[quote
author=Vivy Gift]

U dey surprise me with ur joke o. Vivian ke. Anywayz, if em no fyn, e no
go get access to dey bleep gurls anyhow. Me no get wahala o. Ur free


@rock if u look am well well chichi don dey trip for u o abeg open
access huh [/quote]

No, oh. Peter na my elder brother. Na play i dey play with am, oh.

.

Uduak, wetin u wan do Anita?
Update sharply, oh.

Hi rock,
am Gift frm 2go, have u see the news i told about

2go Lord....I knw sey ur star go pass Ultimate .....Sha 2go quick make u answ us.....
Wey this guy....Kon give me kunu nd pop corn....make i dy fight with am b4 Rock cum

lekinz: 2go Lord....I knw sey ur star go pass Ultimate .....Sha 2go quick make u answ us.....
Wey this guy....Kon give me kunu nd pop corn....make i dy fight with am b4 Rock cum

If u fight i go bundle u out

Chiamaka01: Uduak, wetin u wan do Anita?
Update sharply, oh.

if i update fast u go kiss me

dagift333: Hi rock,
am Gift frm 2go, have u see the news i told about

Yap tanks alot, we go cont d discussion for 2go if we meet again

Ok am back, i dey wait make ten reach fast jare.

Na where my priceless love dey na, abeg i dey love sick.

Make i go check other threads starting from oga kay

Chiamaka01:

No, oh. Peter na my elder brother. Na play i dey play with am, oh.

Okay o. If u say so