Sisikill:

I mi kon le

.

Yeparipa! No wonder Bobo flew into a rage! He is fighting for his "life" (green card) here and she's talking about her baaaaaaabies. To think I was beginning to see him as a sensitive guy for crying. . . asheashe, it was the greencard peppering him. Mama was right, men will only cry for two things - 1) Their favorite team losing  2) Their arrangey marriage wife put her kids before their desire to get papers. Eeeya

Actually,the crying one surprised me o
This kain anambra yoruba that cries anyhow.
The Mr Cunle Comolafe was in his lonely apartment and saw visions and apparitions of his green card flying high up in the sky beyond his reach.
He thought of going back to Acure empty handed and it hit him like a truck load of frozen amala

This is more than sarcasm.

its a question he alone can answer karma

maybe hes scared that the kids wont make him get d papers at d end of d day

KarmaMod:

I couldnt care less about this country, osisi

All I care about is that those who go through this mode of getting papers should be upfront with the person and not have kids.

Karma,

I have had all the children i desire.  There is no man out there other than my ex-husband who can claim to have had babies with me.  I have enough baby daddy drama not to add another to it.  when we seperated 6 years ago I knew that once I had our last child I would get my tubes tied.  I did not want another man fathering children for me.

He did not need to make me fall in love with him to get his papers.  And if he feels differently then he can share the truth with me and i will still fulfill my end of the agreement.

Hmmmmm Hmmmmmmmmm Hmmmmmmmmmm

Wetin i nor go see. . . . .Ikechukwu in Ondo state? .
Soon we go see Adewale from Anambra . . . . . .Owiziwizi for this land. . . . . . . .Gongo ti so ni ile Sista oooooh!
This is not good for my health. . . . . . . .''Tussssssssssssh!. . . . Runs from thread''

Queenisha:

Actually,the crying one surprised me o
This kain anambra yoruba that cries anyhow.
The Mr Cunle Comolafe was in his lonely apartment and saw visions and apparitions of his green card flying high up in the sky beyond his reach.
He thought of going back to [b]Acure [/b]empty handed and it hit him like a truck load of frozen amala

ROTFLMAOPIMP!

You have killed me tonight!!!!      

my food don cold finish make I go chop jare.
sistawoman, take a trip to the man and give it to him in that apartment.
It works everytime.

He did not need to make me fall in love with him to get his papers. And if he feels differently then he can share the truth with me and i will still fulfill my end of the agreement.

Here's hoping he's that noble.

sistawoman:

Karma,

I have had all the children i desire.  There is no man out there other than my ex-husband who can claim to have had babies with me.  I have enough baby daddy drama not to add another to it.  when we seperated 6 years ago I knew that once I had our last child I would get my tubes tied.  I did not want another man fathering children for me.

He did not need to make me fall in love with him to get his papers.  And if he feels differently then he can share the truth with me and i will still fulfill my end of the agreement.

mama ooooooo , ibare meni-men. shey you fit let me know your daughter,maybe u.

dyabman:

mama ooooooo , ibare meni-men. shey you fit let me know your daughter,maybe u.

Translate please

@sistawoman,

You guys should try to settle the problem. You're married to a Naija man, and most Naija men do not tolerate sarcasm from their wives, especially when there are serious matters at stake. You were wrong and you must apologize to him. You may get away with not apologizing (sincerely) for now, but don't be surprised if he holds it against you in the future. Discard you pride, humble yourself before your husband, and apologize to him, sincerely and with utmost remorse. Any woman telling you the contrary is a spinster!

Sarcasms are designed to ridicule, and they're not jokes. Jokes are designed to make you laugh. Some people may find a sarcastic statement funny, but only when the person being ridiculed is someone they despise. All these teenage-minded ladies extolling the virtues of sarcasm, will cry like babies if someone makes a sarcastic comment about their mothers, fathers, or grandparents. There is nothing genuinely funny about any sarcastic statement.

and since when did sarcasm require people mentioning the other person's family?

Gosh you must be a chore to hang out with.

Amos called last night as I expected to find out from me what happened. I explained to him what happened.

Amos said that he would speak with my husband and let him know he has taken this way too far and that he must understand it was for the children. Amos told me that he was upset because I did not consult him before changing the appointment and that I lied about it.

I told Amos that he was correct I should have never lied about it and I should have consulted him. I also reminded Amos that I have been head of my house for over 16 years and that sometimes i really forget that i need to consult/inform my husband of decisons that are made and that I will just tell him the truth no matter how i feel he will react. I told Amos that I did not want him to tell me no that i could not reschedule and cause a fight between us but that lying has done just that.

He told me that my husband needed time to sort thru his anger and that if he is not home by the time i get home from work today that i should call him so that he can drag his butt home. He reassured me that he loves me and is just angered that his wife would do such a thing.

We shall see what 530 brings today.

@ RichyBlack,

There is a difference between snide sarcasm and well-meaning sarcasm.

I take it you abhor snide sarcasm as anyone should, but well-meaning and funny sarcasm is OK and is actually healthy for human relationships.

You're in a lesbian relationship sista, your husband is a woman.
Still didnt come home after all the "crying"? Elewon.

Ibime:

, but well-meaning and funny sarcasm is OK and is actually healthy for human relationships.

Geez Thank You. The time I don't advocate sarcastic banter is if a couple are in the midst of a serious discussion then it's really unnecessary and makes it seem like one party or even both parties arent taking the matter seriously like they should ie sista's situation

Other than that, bring it on jare!

sistawoman:

Amos called last night as I expected to find out from me what happened.  I explained to him what happened.

Amos said that he would speak with my husband and let him know he has taken this way too far and that he must understand it was for the children.  Amos told me that he was upset because I did not consult him before changing the appointment and that I lied about it.

I told Amos that he was correct I should have never lied about it and I should have consulted him.  I also reminded Amos that I have been head of my house for over 16 years and that sometimes[b] i really forget that i need to consult/inform my husband of decisons that are made and that I will just tell him the truth no matter how i feel he will react.[/b]  I told Amos that I did not want him to tell me no that i could not reschedule and cause a fight between us but that lying has done just that.

He told me that my husband needed time to sort through his anger and that if he is not home by the time i get home from work today that i should call him so that he can drag his butt home.  He reassured me that he loves me and is just angered that his wife would do such a thing.

We shall see what 530 brings today.

now wait a minute,this is an arrangy marriage abi?arrangy means arrangement

so do u owe him any explanation for watever u do?you're doing him a favour for christ sake


consult which husband?d one dat will loeave u one day after getting his papers?

oh goshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i feel like e-slapping u sistawoman

mesmya:

now wait a minute,this is an arrangy marriage abi?arrangy means arrangement

so do u owe him any explanation for watever u do?you're doing him a favour for christ sake


consult which husband?d one that will loeave u one day after getting his papers?

oh goshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i feel like e-slapping u sistawoman

And if he does then I will cry and heal my heart, pick up the pieces and move on. Right now I know that I am in love with him and we live as real husband and wife. If this arrangement turns into a permenent thing then it does if not I knew what i was doing when i crossed that line and opened my heart. I am a grown woman and accept full responsibility for all of my actions.

as long as u dont come here crying out ur heart again,we r ok

mesmya:

as long as u don't come here crying out your heart again,we r ok

Why cant i cry out my heart? Or come to you guys with help understanding my husband?

Cause to be truthful if he was American this would have never been an issue. My American husband would have said Bleep you too sistawoman, now carry that ass upstairs so i can take care of you and make you understand you should not do this again.

now wait a minute,this is an arrangy marriage abi?arrangy means arrangement

so do u owe him any explanation for watever u do?you're doing him a favour for christ sake


consult which husband?d one that will loeave u one day after getting his papers?

oh goshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i feel like e-slapping u sistawoman

Like I said, if anyone should be grovelling it's him. He's lucky he's with sista. MOST woman would have INS on speeddial anytime he acts up. Deservingly so.

dont come here and cry ur eyes out,cos everybody is telling u to be wise and u r still allowing infatuation kill u

we dont want to witness another heart break abeg,d ones we r dealing wt is too much

the worst thing dat will happen to anybody is ----------------seeing the disaster b4 u and keep moving to grab it

KarmaMod:

Like I said, if anyone should be grovelling it's him. He's lucky he's with sista. MOST woman would have INS on speeddial anytime he acts up. Deservingly so.

karma my dear dats my annoyance,shes doing him a favour and d man is there acting like a cheap slut(yes ooo hes a slut now,cos hes a woman as far as i a concerned)sorry sistawoman for insulting ur hubby but since u need advise get ready to receive it anyhow

mesmya:

don't come here and cry your eyes out,because everybody is telling u to be wise and you're still allowing infatuation kill u

we don't want to witness another heart break abeg,d ones we r dealing wt is too much

the worst thing that will happen to anybody is ----------------seeing the disaster before u and keep moving to grab it

But what is wrong with riding this out to see where it will lead then falling back on those that you talk to for comfort.
I know that I cant compare Niaraland to that of my best friends or close friends I would think that I would be able to come here and be far more naked and exposed then anywhere else, since we all hide behind made up names and in cities that most will never visit.
I would like to think that Nairaland is a place that I can come to for advice and suggestions. and since my heart is already involved then why not continue to make it work. Why not see where this is going. I have 3 years that I am tied to him.

God knows that it took every single bit of strength in me not to call INS. But I love this man and sending him on a slow boat back to Akure is really not what my heart wants to do. I would not even threathen him with that. I made a promise and I intend on fulfilling it even if his intentions are not true. As long as my children are not damaged or hurt in the process I am all good.

sistawoman:


But what is wrong with riding this out to see where it will lead then falling back on those that you talk to for comfort.
I know that I can't compare Niaraland to that of my best friends or close friends I would think that I would be able to come here and be far more naked and exposed then anywhere else, since we all hide behind made up names and in cities that most will never visit.
I would like to think that Nairaland is a place that I can come to for advice and suggestions. and since my heart is already involved then why not continue to make it work.  Why not see where this is going.  I have 3 years that I am tied to him.

God knows that it took every single bit of strength in me not to call INS.  But I love this man and sending him on a slow boat back to Akure is really not what my heart wants to do.  I would not even threathen him with that.  I made a promise and I intend on fulfilling it even if his intentions are not true.  As long as my children are not damaged or hurt in the process I am all good.

we know u love dis man sistawoman,infact its very obvious,all we r saying is ,love wt ur head and not ur heart,be wise dats all,gone r those days wen pple love blindly,blind love no longer exists

In addtion the only thing he will accomplish by staying away is allowing my heart to harden because as of right now I have not been demanding in my requests.  If he keeps it up he will see what a bitch I can be and will be working 3 jobs to keep with my demands.

mesmya:

we know u love this man sistawoman,infact its very obvious,all we r saying is ,love wt your head and not your heart,be wise that is all,gone r those days when people love blindly,blind love no longer exists

I understand what you are saying. It is hard to follow your head when your heart hurts so much with the thought of not being with him.

Someone said that I should stop begging him but I dont see what i did yesterday as begging. What I did yesterday was woman up and acknowledge my mistake and asked for forgiveness. I have held out the olive branch and opened the door for him to step thru it. If he chooses not to, if he figures I am too much work or this not worth it then so be. I can not and will not keep a man that does not want to be kept.

My heart has been broken before and it healed. I have the most powerful healers in the world. They are 3 strong, two boys and girl and with them they can heal all wounds. So no worries that I am going to come on here and call all Nigerian men dogs, cheats or heart breakers. I just know that with him it did not work just like it did work with the American men before him.

I still contend that Nigerian men are the men of men but I am begining to suspect that only Nigerian women really understand them and that only American men really understand us. Like I said and African American male would have handled this totally different.

by d way sistawoman,honestly speaking,u shouldnt have gone into this(arrangy) marriage,because of your kids,u must lead by example,kids of this days r very smart and intelligent,watever decision u make in life ,u should consider them first,imagine their father leaving them for u alone to handle,and then u getting married for paper reason,don't u think those kids r watching u?imagine them calling your husband daddy and then one day,d man might disappear,what other story do u have them,don't u know that its watever u do they will do?they r following your footsteps for christsake

mesmya:

by d way sistawoman,honestly speaking,u shouldnt have gone into this(arrangy) marriage,because of your kids,u must lead by example,kids of this days r very smart and intelligent,watever decision u make in life ,u should consider them first,imagine their father leaving them for u alone to handle,and then u getting married for paper reason,don't u think those kids r watching u?imagine them calling your husband daddy and then one day,d man might disappear,what other story do u have them,don't u know that its watever u do they will do?they r following your footsteps for christsake

No no no no my kids would never ever call him daddy.

sistawoman:


No no no no my kids would never ever call him daddy.

what do they call him?they know u both r married don't they?they know u both live together or im i wrong?what will u tell them if this man leaves u tomorrow

mesmya:

what do they call him?they know u both r married don't they?they know u both live together or im i wrong?what will u tell them if this man leaves u tomorrow

They call him by his first name.  They know we are married.  And if it does not work then they will know that we are divorced.

In the western world divorce is not a big deal, plus their dad and I are divorced.

And if children always followed thier parents footsteps I would still be married to my first husband as my parents are still married.

stop deceiving urself sistawoman,kids r humans,and they grab any situation they see around them,except ur kids r not smart,but i know dat kids dis days r smart,and imagine them telling pple that their mum is married and then telling the same pple dat their mum is no longer married,for heavens sake dat is not a good record

I

still contend that Nigerian men are the men of men but I am begining to suspect that only Nigerian women really understand them and that only American men really understand us. Like I said and African American male would have handled this totally different.

I know Im gonna step on toes with this comment but to be honest i really DONT understand why "foreign" women esp American women bother with Nigerian men. Seriously. It's mostly Naija women that know how to deal with their bullshit and keep them on their toes.
He knows you love him thus why hes taking advantage. Imagine running away from such a silly argument. Yea he must have been annoyed but being the "man" he should be the one to sya "we have to SERIOUSY discuss this", not running off like a kid where you go frantic calling family. What a coward.

anyway hopefully he comes back to his senses. When he gets back, apologize for the sarcastic quip but also make sure he understand that you didnt appreciate his behavior, then talk it out

that's the most you can do now