She said he died in a ghastly motor accident after graduation and some years later she got married and so she named their first son after her lost love. Hubby just discovered and has refused to talk to her for 2weeks now.


I think hubby is overreacting so i advised her to give him space and later explain things to him. What do you all Think?

Hmmm...

Holding a grudge against the dead? He'll never win...

Why should she have done that in the first place , no matter how much she loved him he's dead n gone , there's no need bringing him into her present relationship , no one will be happy after knowing that , she should just apologize to him , he'll definitely get over it.

if na u nko? Na d woman suppose beg d hubby. Imagine naming a first son after a lover even a dead one.

Hmmm, love is never till death do us part, it goes beyond death.

I felt somehow betrayed while reading this so I wouldn't comment.

Tell d guy 2 b matured its just a name

The husband should grow up joor.not that the so called first love is still alive that he will be competing with

the naming should be a joint effort - how come it was a unilateral decision from her


is he sure he is d father of the child

SAMBARRY: The husband should grow up joor.not that the so called first love is still alive that he will be competing with

Tell me about it.

The man obviously had no qualms with the child's name at birth. Suddenly, months / years later he gets all hot under the collar and feels betrayed? To the point where he keeps his wife malice?

Yeah, sounds like a really mature way of handling his "issue". Let him continue with his "fight" against the dead. Who knows, he might just "win" sef...

@OP: This man has got too much time on his hands. Advice him to go out there and hustle like a real man, instead of trying to conquer the spirit world.

She should put herself in his shoes. How will she feel if he did same to her?

Who's he even fighting with? Do people fight with the dead? Am sure it will even sound ridiculous saying such. If anyone says it to my hearing the next thing he will hear is my friend shut up there. If it is paining you that bad go and kill the child, divorce the woman and marry another woman that will name her child after his mother's name. Mshewwww


okugbe

EfemenaXY:

Tell me about it.

The man obviously had no qualms with the child's name at birth. Suddenly, months / years later he gets all hot under the collar and feels betrayed? To the point where he keeps his wife malice?

Yeah, sounds like a really mature way of handling his "issue". Let him continue with his "fight" against the dead. Who knows, he might just "win" sef...

@OP: This man has got too much time on his hands. Advice him to go out there and hustle like a real man, instead of trying to conquer the spirit world.

That moment when you start thinking - what if the situation were reversed?

It's just. A name he should get over himself jor











Am guilty of dis 2

merieam16: Tell d guy 2 b matured its just a name

Men hey? Why the upset?

Just because everytime he calls his sons name he is reminded of the man that first shined, polished and buffed his wife's congo, the one who popped her cherry. The one who pillaged and plundered her virgin territory. Who plucked it like a guitar, flipped it up, turned it over, positioned it and turned it around. The striker who worked his way into her box and scored. Repeatedly! Header, back-heel, nutmeg and volley. The tap-in, long range thunderbolt, half-volley and penalty strike.

A permanent reminder of another player - who may have been better. Someone he'll suspect he's "substitute too" and not a "replacement for".

And he can't actually do anything to prove otherwise - this guy is immortalised and a legend - as his wife will always have this romanticised ideal of loffaboy in her head.

Such treachery - that's why he's refusing to play! Name change, transfer or substitution .


TV

freakcin: That moment when you start thinking - what if the situation were reversed?

Absolutely irrelevant.

What's important is the meaning of the name and not who bore it before.

Is that name unique to the deceased only, and no one else in the world?

I find it strange that people expect the husband to just accept it. If tables were turned I would be really hurt. I can't imagine my husband naming my child after an ex dead or not. I would take it to mean that a part of him still yearns for what would have been and he is not totally happy in the marriage

I find it very disrespectful

Tv there's nobody who doesn't know what having srx looks like. If you want to describe the intricacies of having srx with a virgin move to srxuality section except you want to turn this place to one and I will help you bombard this place with graphic images and porn videos so please behave yourself

TV01:

Men hey? Why the upset?

Just because everytime he calls his sons name he is reminded of the man that first shined, polished and buffed his wife's congo, the one who popped her cherry. The one who pillaged and plundered her virgin territory. Who plucked it like a guitar, flipped it up, turned it over, positioned it and turned it around. The striker who worked his way into her box and scored. Repeatedly! Header, back-heel, nutmeg and volley. The tap-in, long range thunderbolt, half-volley and penalty strike.

A permanent reminder of another player - who may have been better. Someone he'll suspect he's "substitute too" and not a "replacement for".

And he can't actually do anything to prove otherwise - this guy is immortalised and a legend - as his wife will always have this romanticised ideal of loffaboy in her head.

Such treachery - that's why he's refusing to play! Name change, transfer or substitution .


TV

shooze: I find it strange that people expect the husband to just accept it. If tables were turned I would be really hurt. I can't imagine my husband naming my child after an ex dead or not. I would take it to mean that a part of him still yearns for what would have been and he is not totally happy in the marriage
I find it very disrespectful

I concur

What if she just loves the name?
If someone has some exes, does it means that their names are a no go area for the man/woman to name their child? i.e if i happen to have an ex (whether dead or alive) who is Stephen/Stella, it means i must never name any of my children that?
Did the woman tell the hubby that she named the child after her lover or he just got to find out about the lover's name and assumed that his child was named after him? So many unanswered questions.

Someone is asking if the man is the father of the child. But from what i read here, the lover has even died years before she got married so it is absolutely obvious that the child is not the lover's.

Maybe she should just beg the hubby for peace to reign. And i believe the child has got more than one name so let them start calling the child by one of his other names.

And let daddy explain to son that the reason for changing his name is because he was named after mommy's long dead ex lover.

shooze: I find it strange that people expect the husband to just accept it. If tables were turned I would be really hurt. I can't imagine my husband naming my child after an ex dead or not. I would take it to mean that a part of him still yearns for what would have been and he is not totally happy in the marriage

I find it very disrespectful

Does it really matter? If wife hasnt ever disrespected you in anyway why bother?
The main thing should be that wifey still loves and respects you

Can youname your child after your ex..

Godmystrength: What if she just loves the name?

If someone has some exes, does it means that their names are a no go area for the man/woman to name their child? i.e if i happen to have an ex (whether dead or alive) who is Stephen/Stella, it means i must never name any of my children that?
Did the woman tell the hubby that she named the child after her lover or he just got to find out about the lover's name and assumed that his child was named after him? So many unanswered question.

Someone is asking if the man is the father of the child. But from what i read here, the lover has even died years before she got married so it is absolutely obvious that the child is not the lover's.

Maybe she should just beg the hubby for peace to reign. And i believe the child has got more than one name so let them start calling the child by one of his other names.

And let daddy explain to son that the reason for changing his name is because he was named after mommy's long dead ex lover.

Now let's put ourselves in this man's shoe, how would you feel if it were you?

The man has every right to be angry, more so because she never told him about it, he is the father of the child and has every right to know everything about his child, now he prolly agreed to the name because he loves his wife only to find out she chose it because of a dead lover, I bet he'll be feeling like 2nd place in his wife's life and that's not a good feeling.

Anyways, the deed's been done so he should just let go, the wife had better continued pleading cos she's in the wrong here.

sexybash: It's just. A name he should get over himself jor











Am guilty of dis 2

If you are being serious, can you honestly tell us why you did such?

Elantracey: Why should she have done that in the first place , no matter how much she loved him he's dead n gone , there's no need bringing him into her present relationship , no one will be happy after knowing that , she should just apologize to him , he'll definitely get over it.

Sometimes you just love someone soo much that you just cant forget them.

pickabeau1: Can youname your child after your ex..

I will name my child(ren) names that i love not because it is or is not an ex's name. If i love a name, i love it regardless of who is bearing it.
In fact, there is a woman that hurts my family so bad that we don't even like her but my son and her first child have same name. when people initially called me ''mummy xxxxx'' i will remember her because that is what we call her too. But after a while, it made no difference to me.

That is why i was asking whether the woman intentionally named the child after her dead lover or it was just a mere coincidence.
If she did it because she wanted to be remembering her dead lover, then too bad and not acceptable.........

Godmystrength: Maybe she should just beg the hubby for peace to reign. And i believe the child has got more than one name so let them start calling the child by one of his other names.

ok...

Seems its really not a big deal..right?

Godmystrength: I will name my child(ren) names that i love not because it is or is not an ex's name. If i love a name, i love it regardless of who is bearing it.
In fact, there is a woman that hurts my family so bad that we don't even like her but my son and her first child have same name. when people initially called me ''mummy xxxxx'' i will remember her because that is what we call her too. But after a while, it made no difference to me.

That is why i was asking whether the woman intentionally named the child after her dead lover or it was just a mere coincidence.
If she did it because she wanted to be remembering her dead lover, then too bad and not acceptable.........

The man has every right to be angry.

What I dont understand is how this name was never mentioned during dating. How does one hide something as big as that from the person you want to marry?

If she had discussed it with him before, maybe he would have even agreed to it. Its the keeping the reason to herself that I dont agree with. Names are supposed to be well thought of.

I will be pissed off too if I found out years later that my hubby named our kid after an ex

EfemenaXY:
Absolutely irrelevant.
What's important is the meaning of the name and not who bore it before.
Is that name unique to the deceased only, and no one else in the world?

Of course its always irrelevant when its a guy complaining.

How can you name your first son in the memory of a late lover? Obviously, she's yet to let go of his memories, which I don't have a problem with. But naming her child after him

Na wah oooh!

pickabeau1: the naming should be a joint effort - how come it was a unilateral decision from her


is he sure he is d father of the child

Even when couple agree names for their children, someone must first come up with the name before they decide to adopt it. So if it happens that it is the wife's suggestion that was accepted, does it make the child paternity questionable?
The only reason why i feel the NAME is an issue is because it is the dead lover's name.

But on another note, is it that the woman didn't tell the husband about her past relationship and dead lover? How come he is just discovering that its the lover's name that was given to the child by his wife?

TV01:
Men hey? Why the upset?
Just because everytime he calls his sons name he is reminded of the man that first shined, polished and buffed his wife's congo, the one who popped her cherry. The one who pillaged and plundered her virgin territory. Who plucked it like a guitar, flipped it up, turned it over, positioned it and turned it around. The striker who worked his way into her box and scored. Repeatedly! Header, back-heel, nutmeg and volley. The tap-in, long range thunderbolt, half-volley and penalty strike.
A permanent reminder of another player - who may have been better. Someone he'll suspect he's "substitute too" and not a "replacement for".
And he can't actually do anything to prove otherwise - this guy is immortalised and a legend - as his wife will always have this romanticised ideal of loffaboy in her head.
Such treachery - that's why he's refusing to play! Name change, transfer or substitution .
TV

Guy, u wan kill the hubby!

Godmystrength: Even when couple agree names for their children, someone must first come up with the name before they decide to adopt it. So if it happens that it is the wife's suggestion that was accepted, does it make the child paternity questionable?
The only reason why i feel the NAME is an issue is because it is the dead lover's name.

But on another note, is it that the woman didn't tell the husband about her past relationship and dead lover? How come he is just discovering that its the lover's name that was given to the child by his wife?

Now you r asking the key questions

freakcin:
Of course its always irrelevant when its a guy complaining.
How can you name your first son in the memory of a late lover? Obviously, she's yet to let go of his memories, which I don't have a problem with. But naming her child after him
Na wah oooh!

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