First the Op didn't say she's the one in this case.
And yes I understand perfectly what's happened here.
My first post that you quoted was my response to TV's post which summarized my feelings about the topic. There was no need going off repeating what was in his post which I was agreeing with.
Which I also made clear in this post

quite true. Imagine the hubby naming daughter after his ex lover.
Wifey will always feel like she's just second best and he's managing her because he couldn't end up with the former lady

So you see you have comprehension issues.
Or as usual the cococandy fever won't let you read straight.

Anyway to the point.

after all the vexing which is understandable, what next?
Change the boy's name out of anger?

You my friend are the one who has a lot to learn.
I repeat if the boy isn't in his infancy,then changing the name isn't the solution.

Names go a long way to shape identities and what people think of themselves.
A growing child who sees himself as Obi the 15yr old math champion of his class will have problems adjusting to ikenna all of a sudden.
Who's ikenna?
He doesn't know.
He can't up and just start seeing himself as someone else overnight.
Believe it or not there's a psychology behind it.

When people change names,they are adults and there is something disticnt about the name that makes them want to give it up. Or they have a different idea of who they are and they want to go ahead to establish their new personality.

I rest my case.

freshdude2: So, for the all the replay time that your ideas had in your mind, all you could muster was this tosh?

How about, Emmanuel, my son, is actually Emmanuel, a perfect reminder of what my wife lost, what shed have preferred, what she desires. Emmanuel, you see, has more significance than jst a name. It is an immortalisation of another human my wife loves. A part of her history she just can't let go of, despite that we're married and have a child. She could have a business and name it Emmanuel but instead she chooses to name our child after her ex. I'm not sure your brain can grasp all that now but not to worry, it'll all make sense someday.

Plus, people change names all the time for a billion and one less drastic and important reasons. Surely, if 3cycle's husband wanted to change their child's name, persuading him not to do so to avoid confusing the child would be another insult. I guess you didn't think of that. But then again, you're Cococandy, what do you know?!

This rambler seems to have more sense in his garri than your entire being.

ERM..cococandy.....adults change names every time
Even surnames

Its not rocket science

Adults right?
Good

pickabeau1: ERM..cococandy.....adults change names every time
Even surnames

Its not rocket science

Did I say they didn't?
But every adult has a REASON within them for changing their name.
EOD

cococandy: Adults right?
Good

Not only adults... Even adolescents

You used a 15 year old example


I have people whose parents changes their surnames due to the old one having some idol init
Everyone complied

Good..

Good.
The whole family changed because...
Good reason. Known reason.
And everyone understood and complied.

What are you going to tell a boy about his first name that won't sound funny?
That he was named after the mom's ex?

pickabeau1:

Not only adults... Even adolescents

You used a 15 year old example


I have people whose parents changes their surnames due to the old one having some idol init
Everyone complied

Good..

cococandy: First the Op didn't say she's the one in this case.
And yes I understand perfectly what's happened here.
My first post that you quoted was my response to TV's post which summarized my feelings about the topic. There was no need going off repeating what was in his post which I was agreeing with.

But after all the vexing which is understandable, what next?
Change the boy's name out of anger?

You my friend are the one who has a lot to learn.
I repeat if the boy isn't in his infancy,then changing the name isn't the solution.

Names go a long way to shape identities and what people think of themselves.
A growing child who sees himself as Obi the 15yr old math champion of his class will have problems adjusting to ikenna all of a sudden.
Who's ikenna?
He doesn't know.
He can't up and just start seeing himself as someone else overnight.
Believe it or not there's a psychology behind it.

When people change names,they are adults and there is something disticnt about the name that makes them want to give it up. Or they have a different idea of who they are and they want to go ahead to establish their new personality.

I rest my case.

Who would have taken you for an expert in Child Name/Name Psychology, aren't you quite the onion?! What's to stop a math champion from becoming an all-round champion? Abi na only adverse effects name change dey cause? Are you categorically saying that nothing good can come of this proposed name-change? Woman, abeg leave sentiments for one side. If a name can make one form an identity, why can't another help the child form an even more formidable identity and/or sense of self?! Unless you're saying, the first name is the best or he has to be an adult to change his name in order not to regress abi what are you saying?

So, what exactly, according to you, is the solution?!

cococandy: Good.
The whole family changed because...
Good reason. Known reason.
And everyone understood and complied.

What are you going to tell a boy about his first name that won't sound funny?
That he was named after the mom's ex?

Whatever reason... My point is that changing names is not as complicated as you seem to be making it sound

These are the parents.... Not some random people

That was an example.

My solution?
You're still asking? Are you even reading?

Here goes:
If he's a baby change it.if you wish to

If he's not don't.
Use his middle name.

freshdude2: Who would have taken you for an expert in Child Name/Name Psychology, aren't you quite the onion?! What's to stop a math champion from becoming an all-round champion? Abi na only adverse effects name change dey cause? Are you categorically saying that nothing good can come of this proposed name-change? Woman, abeg leave sentiments for one side. If a name can make one form an identity, why can't another help the child form an even more formidable identity and/or sense of self?! Unless you're saying, the first name is the best or he has to be an adult to change his name in order not to regress abi what are you saying?

So, what exactly, according to you, is the solution?!

cococandy:
If he's not don't.
Use his middle name.

Oh, I see. And if the mother gave him all his names?

Your example is off, by the way. It goes both way, it doesn't support your stance.

...new twist

His middle name is the ex middle name also

Na wa oh Women of this generation and their fish brain

To be honest, if I know how men think 3 things will come to mind

1. Divorce

2. Name the daughter after his own ex and impregnate another woman on their bed

3. Get a second wife.

I will advice the husband not to change the name but do one of the following

pickabeau1: ...new twist

His middle name is the ex middle name also

First name: Biolabee
Middle name: Pickabeau

Both na one and the same person. Even if you change the child's name to middle name, we are still talking the same ex!

shooze: I find it strange that people expect the husband to just accept it. If tables were turned I would be really hurt. I can't imagine my husband naming my child after an ex dead or not. I would take it to mean that a part of him still yearns for what would have been and he is not totally happy in the marriage

I find it very disrespectful

God bless you woman for speaking up and being objective. The ladies waving this aside as no issue will be the first to draw a sword if their hubby or boyfriend calls them in an exes name in the heat of the thang-thing. Hypocrisy I will say.

.

Idowuogbo:
*singing* she's sprung.... The jazz my boy do am no b here. Sexy, i lie?

You no lie o jare, that's the only reason for such.

pickabeau1: ...new twist

His middle name is the ex middle name also

Abi na.

aljharem: Na wa oh Women of this generation and their fish brain

To be honest, if I know how men think 3 things will come to mind

1. Divorce

2. Name the daughter after his own ex and impregnate another woman on their bed

3. Get a second wife.

I will advice the husband not to change the name but do one of the following

O.o What fuckery is this?

EnlightenedSoul:

O.o What fuckery is this?

The same fuckery women create. You turn them into monsters, then y'all sit there and claim victim.Worrapirri

Idowuogbo:
The same fuckery women create. You turn them into monsters, then y'all sit there and claim victim.Worrapirri

Lolll
I can totally see the other side of it. And I don't think the woman is a victim at ALL but moving forward a lot of these answers are a bit on the extreme side, dontcha think?

One word: EGO.

Whatever works, I guess.

merieam16: Tell d guy 2 b matured its just a name

WHEN A WOMAN WANTS TO TAKE HER FILTH, SHE WOULD ASK YOU TO BE 'MATURE' OR "BE A REAL MAN". I HAVE NEVER CUSSED ANYONE ON NL- ITS JUST A NAME RIGHT? HOW WOULD U FEEL IF UR HUSBAND NAMES YOUR DAUGHTER AFTER HIS EX? YOU ARE REALLY IGNORANT AND A DONKEY!

The ghost of my wife's ex is sleeping in my bed

pickabeau1:

The ghost of my wife's ex is sleeping in my bed

the ghost ke? Look well o. Are you sure its not the ex for real flesh and blood life.

Godmystrength: the ghost ke? Look well o. Are you sure its not the ex for real flesh and blood life.

That's what the person in this story is contending with

aljharem: Na wa oh Women of this generation and their fish brain

To be honest, if I know how men think 3 things will come to mind

1. Divorce

2. Name the daughter after his own ex and impregnate another woman on their bed

3. Get a second wife.

I will advice the husband not to change the name but do one of the following

If you aren't fish brained yourself, you won't think the above mentioned is a solution. Before you call any woman fish brain, try and prove your intellectual capability.

What is a man without ego?

pickabeau1:

The ghost of my wife's ex is sleeping in my bed

What's she wearing?

freshdude2: What is a man without ego?

What's she wearing?

Na the hubby I dey imagine
All these our militant females will never tolerate their hubby even keeping exes on BBM not to find out their daughter is named after one ex like that

Osanobua!!!

No food and sex for one month

beeevan:
If you aren't fish brained yourself, you won't think the above mentioned is a solution. Before you call any woman fish brain, try and prove your intellectual capability.

Hahaha, my people say to catch a monkey you must think like one. Sorry to see most of women on this generation act like monkeys and so the man must think like one. I really pity the dude if he does not take those extreme steps.

The marriage is broken already if you all don't realise. His first son, heir to the throne ?

At times you see men stab their wives multiple times. Well this is one of the reasons for unstable men. I don't support sure but I will recommend those 3 options

I can't imagine such happening to me.
I would just start making arrangement to get a second wife the moment i am through with carrying out a detailed DNA analysis of the child in question.
She can leave if she dosen't want a polygamous home.

aljharem:

Hahaha, my people say to catch a monkey you must think like one. Sorry to see most of women on this generation act like monkeys and so the man must think like one. I really pity the dude if he does not take those extreme steps.

The marriage is broken already if you all don't realise. His first son, heir to the throne ?

At times you see men stab their wives multiple times. Well this is one of the reasons for unstable men. I don't support sure but I will recommend those 3 options

If you have regards for marriage by any stretch of the imagination, you won't advise divorce just because of a dead ex, you simply change the name and wify serves her penance for being so dim.


Will you suggest divorce if a man was the offender?

pickabeau1: ...new twist

His middle name is the ex middle name also

Are you serious?

Did the wife name the son alone or is the second name just a coincidence?

The son should be rededicated and renamed

pickabeau1:

Na the hubby I dey imagine
All these our militant females will never tolerate their hubby even keeping exes on BBM not to find out their daughter is named after one ex like that

Osanobua!!!

No food and sex for one month

Hmm, what an unfortunate situation. I'm sure the guy would be de-balled if he had done same. And these women love to scream 'double standards'.