vivaladiva:

i so love guys that act like they r in control of everything as stated by the poster, i ve dated the good looking, ladies man, tough exterior no woman can get inside me, got a big c=o=c=k and knows how to use it so am goin to sleep with other girls too even though we r in a reltionship kind of guy, and trust me its all bullshit, such guys just bring out the naughty woman in me, so u think u r bad and tough haha, i will fall for your charms in the begining might even fall in love with u but then i would realise wat a two timing Arrow u are and regain control of my emotions, bt then i will stick around till i wear u out, break dwn that tough exterior, get under your skin, get u to change frm not saying i love u to saying it almost every day, make u cry, accept that u wont cheat on me again, start a business with u, u will propose to me, and then just wen u think u have eaten your cake n had it, u wont b able to get hold of my mobile like u used to, u will catch me snogging your mate behind your back, u will get so angry but still take me bck, i will promise not to do it again, but i wont call wen i say i will, i will disappear n make u travel miles to come get me bck, i will promise not to leave again, and then just about the time your getting comfy again, i will leave your sorry arse for an equally good looking high flying guy, when it comes to mind games, trust me i got it covered, mybe for some retarded girls that your plan might work but as for me, that effing strategy sucks

i cant be wiv no effing man who isnt willing to open up to me, acting like the moon n sun shines out of his arse, no bloody way

LOL, iLike. Has it ever occurred to U that a man could do the same thing to you? Penetrate your defenses only to leave U hanging?

@ topic. If she talks without permission, slap the Bit.ch. If she is too quiet, slap her again. If she sleeps, punch her, if she wakes up, kick her.   If she complains, baptize her with hot palm oil,  You will control her very well.



Not sure why anyone will want to control their partner tho. I find submissive girls very unattractive. Besides the whole joy of being with a babe is to be able to enjoy her being herself, which is what i was attracted to in the first place. If my girl non-existent  objects to something I say, or want, or do, I want to know why, and I assume that it is because she thinks her opinion is in my best interest. Isn't that a major point of having a partner. . . so we're stronger together than separately? Why da fuc.k would u wanna control your woman?!?! Or betta still, why would any real man wanna be with a woman he can control?

when am in love with a man, am in love
i dont like mind games and i  only resort to them when am pushed to it
i love my current partner to bits and wld go the extra mile to make him happy
i am a person of two extremes, either hot or cold, hardly ever inbtw
if am loving u like my life depends on it, i expect the same from my man, simple

Krayola:

Not sure why anyone will want to control their partner tho. I find submissive girls very unattractive. Besides the whole joy of being with a babe is to be able to enjoy her being herself, which is what i was attracted to in the first place. If my girl non-existent objects to something I say, or want, or do, I want to know why, and I assume that it is because she thinks her opinion is in my best interest. Isn't that the point of having a partner. . . so we're stronger together than separately. Why da fuc.k would u wanna control your woman?!?! Or betta still, why would any real man wanna be with a woman he can control?

my point exactly

vivaladiva:

i so love guys that act like they r in control of everything as stated by the poster, i ve dated  the good looking, ladies man, tough exterior no woman can get inside me, got a big c=o=c=k and knows how to use it so am goin to sleep with other girls too even though we r in a reltionship kind of guy, and trust me its all bullshit, such guys just bring out the naughty woman in me, so u think u r bad and tough haha, i will fall for your charms in the begining might even fall in love with u but then i would realise wat a two timing Arrow u are and regain control of my emotions, bt then i will stick around till i wear u out, break dwn that tough exterior, get under your skin, get u to change frm not saying i love u to saying it almost every day, make u cry, accept that u wont cheat on me again, start a business with u, u will propose to me, and then just wen u think u have eaten your cake n had it, u wont b able to get hold of my mobile like u used to, u will catch me snogging your mate behind your back, u will get so angry but still take me bck, i will promise not to do it again, but i wont call wen i say i will, i will disappear n make u travel miles to come get me bck, i will promise not to leave again, and then just about the time your getting comfy again, i will leave your sorry arse for an equally good looking high flying guy, when it comes to mind games, trust me i got it covered, mybe for some retarded girls that your plan might work but as for me, that effing strategy sucks

i cant be wiv no effing man who isnt willing to open up to me, acting like the moon n sun shines out of his arse, no bloody way

So, have you ever done this or is this an 'if-I-find-myself-in-this-situation' thingy?

platinumnk, i cn teach u, bt i'll have to charge lol, bt to b honest i look bck on dat relationship n i realise hw much my emotions suffered as a result, contrary to the opinions of the men ave dated, am a very emotional person, bt am a bit like a snail, i withdraw my emotions quickly when stung, and i am very slow to forgive boyfriends when they hurt me especially when it is intentional.  i will let a man know he is hurting me, give him time to mull over his actions and change, if he doesnt, then i bcome revengeful, unfortunately, wat will take a guy 2 years to inflict, will prob take me two months, its always good to go wiv a  loud bang

ravenzord, yes ive been wiv a guy like that

.

vivaladiva:

platinumnk, i cn teach u, bt i'll have to charge lol, bt to b honest i look bck on dat relationship n i realise hw much my emotions suffered as a result, contrary to the opinions of the men ave dated, am a very emotional person, bt am a bit like a snail, i withdraw my emotions quickly when stung, and i am very slow to forgive boyfriends when they hurt me especially when it is intentional. i will let a man know he is hurting me, give him time to mull over his actions and change, if he doesnt, then i bcome revengeful, unfortunately, wat will take a guy 2 years to inflict, will prob take me two months, its always good to go wiv a loud bang

lol can i put down payments lol~ well im learning i guess, i have hardened terrbly over the past few months, self protection I guess

.

DUDE, u ar a guru. I believe u ar retired now, dishing out ur wisdom to young and naive minds. LIFE IS FUN WHEN U LEARN THE ART OF LIVING. I ll give u a BLACK BELT, Sensei

.

With the powers vested in me (by me), I officially declare this topic the:

THREAD OF THE YEAR!!!

(i'm sure platinumnk agrees with me, lol).

You may not yet be a mugu but you are going quickly down the path of MUGU-hood. If you don't have much money and you bought her a phone, MUGU-hood is the least of your problems, you will soon start paying other bills. Right now she might call you all manner of sweet names because of the phone you just bought but in the long run she is going to take it for granted that you pay her bills and believe you me, the moment you lack money to pay those bills, problems start. Do not be an ATM machine.

As far as I'm concerned this muguhood can never end. I done swear for una.

vivaladiva:

i so love guys that act like they r in control of everything as stated by the poster, i ve dated  the good looking, ladies man, tough exterior no woman can get inside me, got a big c=o=c=k and knows how to use it so am goin to sleep with other girls too even though we r in a reltionship kind of guy, and trust me its all bullshit, such guys just bring out the naughty woman in me, so u think u r bad and tough haha, i will fall for your charms in the begining might even fall in love with u but then i would realise wat a two timing Arrow u are and regain control of my emotions, bt then i will stick around till i wear u out, break dwn that tough exterior, get under your skin, get u to change frm not saying i love u to saying it almost every day, make u cry, accept that u wont cheat on me again, start a business with u, u will propose to me, and then just wen u think u have eaten your cake n had it, u wont b able to get hold of my mobile like u used to, u will catch me snogging your mate behind your back, u will get so angry but still take me bck, i will promise not to do it again, but i wont call wen i say i will, i will disappear n make u travel miles to come get me bck, i will promise not to leave again, and then just about the time your getting comfy again, i will leave your sorry arse for an equally good looking high flying guy, when it comes to mind games, trust me i got it covered, mybe for some retarded girls that your plan might work but as for me, that effing strategy sucks

i cant be wiv no effing man who isnt willing to open up to me, acting like the moon n sun shines out of his arse, no bloody way

[size=16pt]vivaladiva,ur mouth too much jor.sure u do these to those feeding bottle guys.[/size]

@ Platinumnk

I observe that you want someone to illustrate what submission practically entails. In that case, consider this hypothetical scenario:

HUSBAND: nk love, i've noticed you're now very chummy with vivaladiva; you exchange visits frequently and converse a lot. I dont like that; she is a bad influence.

WIFE: she's just a good friend darl, i enjoy her company and there's no chance she'd influence me in any negative way. Besides, i'm old enough to choose my own friends.

HUSBAND: I'm not trying to choose your friends for you nk, but i can easily tell that vivaladiva is bad company. Seen her with all sorts of men,  besides, her dressing, general deameanor, and loose morals suggests that she's not your type. Trust me on this one baby. I want you to dissociate yourself from her, find ways to avoid her please. At least for my sake.

WIFE: You're being too jugdemental darl. But since being friends with her makes you uncomfortable, i'll start avoiding her my love. Ok? You know i always put you first.

So, platnumnk. Thats submission my dear. Its not as dreadful a prospect as you may have presumed.

If a Girl must be submissive to the Guy then Guys should never complain about girls demanding money.
A controller must pay for the privilege .

nihun:


If a Girl must be submissive to the Guy then Guys should never complain about girls demanding money.
A controller must pay for the privilege .

Guys no dey even worry about this anymore. The problem is after you spend a lot on them, they still want to be in control.

Akanbi_edu:

Guys no dey even worry about this anymore. The problem is after you spend a lot on them, they still want to be in control.

Yes they do, look at all the threads guys have started crying say , she ask me for this, she ask me for that.

God should be to only controller, and like the girl at the start said, girls are our rib we should treat them with respect.

pro01:

@ Platinumnk

I observe that you want someone to illustrate what submission practically entails. In that case, consider this hypothetical scenario:

HUSBAND: nk love, i've noticed you're now very chummy with vivaladiva; you exchange visits frequently and converse a lot. I dont like that; she is a bad influence.

WIFE: she's just a good friend darl, i enjoy her company and there's no chance she'd influence me in any negative way. Besides, i'm old enough to choose my own friends.

HUSBAND: I'm not trying to choose your friends for you nk, but i can easily tell that vivaladiva is bad company. Seen her with all sorts of men, besides, her dressing, general deameanor, and loose morals suggests that she's not your type. Trust me on this one baby. I want you to dissociate yourself from her, find ways to avoid her please. At least for my sake.

WIFE: You're being too jugdemental darl. But since being friends with her makes you uncomfortable, i'll start avoiding her my love. Ok? You know i always put you first.

So, platnumnk. Thats submission my dear. Its not as dreadful a prospect as you may have presumed.

I see, but why wouldnt he trust me enough to make my own judgements? When I dont critque him on his friends?
And it would be hard for me to just listen based on hear say when he doesnt know her.

@pro01- lemme tell you why I feel that way
I had a best friend, very beautiful, we were inseperable during school days till we grad but we were still close
She met a guy during high school that was very rugged and I told her from the start that he was a bad apple
but she still dated him , I guess because he was cute

So I went off to further my studies, she stayed with him in a relationship
Everytime I tried to encourage her to branch out with education, he was always irritated that I would talk to her.

He proposed to her 4 years ago, and she wanted to marry him, so she "submitted" to everything he told her to do, without questioning; including talking to me, a girl that was like my sister years before he met her!

I was hurt, but what can i do? She took her man over me, so I brushed it off and moved on.

now 4 year later, she is calling me for advice and finally furthering her education why?

Because the man she submitted herself to cheats and gave her two children with no marriage.

I know this is not every situation, but in things like this where men can excersise authority simple because "I said so" without any true reasoning can bite you in the long run.

what r d xteristics of a feedin bottle guy? if there r any am sure ur talking bout ur self

@platinumnk and @pro1

Am sorry am coming in btw u guys
These things you guy fight over are not things you can understand with the carnal mind whether you like it or not the problem has always being on ground even bfor you guys were born.

the simple truth is this the coming of a man and a woman is only ordained by GOD who know all things. HE is the only  ONE who can help our Understanding.

How  sweet it is when man and wive live with one understanding check it out the Life of GOD is there in them
that this saying might be true ''THE FEAR OF THE LORD IS THE BEGINNING OF WISDOM''. IF THE FEAR OF GOD IS IN THEM, then WISDOM must be THERE,  and when there is WISDOM, UNDERSTANDING comes AND there is UNDERSTANDING the JOY JUST FLOWS like the RIVER OF WATERS.

I WISH YOU GUYS THE BEST IN ALL YOUR DOINGS.
TAKE CARE

@ Platinumnk

Your story was quite touching [inhales, exhales and lets out a few sobs]. However, that is precisely why you should NEVER fall in love for the wrong reasons. Submission per se isn't the root cause of your childhood friend's woes. Her 'unrealness' was. (it takes a lot to be a real woman). When girls leave genuinely sweet, good and decent guys and fall cheaply for the so-called 'cute', 'rich', 'tall', 'sexy', 'manly', or 'hot' guys, they are bound to tell tales of woe sooner than later. With these sort of 'GQ' guys, submission or no submission, you'd get no love 'cos they know what (not who) you fell for.

My point is, identify a good man and fall for his simple charms. With such a man, submission becomes pure joy. When he feels so strongly about a given behaviour/tendency/friend etc. of yours, its best to explain yourself but thereafter yield to his wishes. Assuage his insecurities if need be. No need to try to over-assert your stance, or question his judgment if he feels so strongly about the matter. In the end, it takes nothing away from you because you know he truly loves you. Besides, you know he yields to your preferences in so many other facets of your relationship and family life.

P.S. Na wa for you sef. Your mind seems cast in iron on this 'death to submission' mindset. Guess only God can set you right. Just bear in mind that you can only fight fire with water. Fire for fire would only lead to a conflagration. Eh bh ehm [clears throat]. The elders have spoken.

pro01, wat has vivaladiva done to you eh lol

platinumnk:

@pro01- lemme tell you why I feel that way
I had a best friend, very beautiful, we were inseperable during school days till we grad but we were still close
She met a guy during high school that was very rugged and I told her from the start that he was a bad apple
but she still dated him , I guess because he was cute

So I went off to further my studies, she stayed with him in a relationship
Everytime I tried to encourage her to branch out with education, he was always irritated that I would talk to her.

He proposed to her 4 years ago, and she wanted to marry him, so she "submitted" to everything he told her to do, without questioning; including talking to me, a girl that was like my sister years before he met her!

I was hurt, but what can i do? She took her man over me, so I brushed it off and moved on.

now 4 year later, she is calling me for advice and finally furthering her education why?

Because the man she submitted herself to cheats and gave her two children with no marriage.

I know this is not every situation, but in things like this where men can excersise authority simple because "I said so" without any true reasoning can bite you in the long run.

1. Christians take it for granted that if you are one of them then you are automatically smart. (What a lie)

2. You don't submit to someone who is not your husband.

3. You don't even consider someone like that as a husband.

4. Your friend is at fault. She should have known better and being in love is not an excuse.

@pro01-

thanks , but I admit Im a fighter, and highly resistant to unwarranted authority.
I would have the feeling that I got with someone I wanted to share with only to restrict myself

A good man wouldnt try to control his wife to a given fault, and I should be meek to not question his judgement?

Well I blame my dad lol, I was raised doing things like a son, fixing the house and stuff like that, so I can see a partner, but not a somone to marry to take over me like i was running around with my head off.

As my husband, he will have the utmost respect, but if I feel strongly about something, its not my nature to pipe down. Unless he wants to talk about it later, we have to find a resloution and its not "just because I feel like it"

In the pure sense of the word there is no joy in "submission"

You said there is no need to over asert myself, so I should tuck my feeling in a pocket because hes a man?
If I feel like im being treated insignificant I will avoid them at all costs.

So there is the problem itself, He should be able to compromise not make passing judgements like hes my father  

not even my dad does that anymore, if he tells me to do something, and I dont like it, I tell him and he either gives me a reason why he needs it done now or postpones it.

michelin89:

1. Christians take it for granted that if you are one of them then you are automatically smart. (What a lie)

2. You don't submit to someone who is not your husband.

3. You don't even consider someone like that as a husband.

4. Your friend is at fault. She should have known better and being in love is not an excuse.

I dont see where Xianity ties into this

No she wasnt the smartest page in the book, she cheated off me in school

But he mom is a typical homemaker, just finished hs and stayed at home raising kids
So I can see where she saw the same opportunity to do the same, but the guy was wrong for her.

i swear y do people drag religion into every god damn thing, it makes me feel so ill

platinumnk:

I dont see where Xianity ties into this

No she wasnt the smartest page in the book, she cheated off me in school

But he mom is a typical homemaker, just finished hs and stayed at home raising kids
So I can see where she saw the same opportunity to do the same, but the guy was wrong for her.

I am just saying that is what Christians believe. If you follow the rules of the Lord, you'll never fail (a false myth).

Now she has two kids and no father. She made an expensive mistake. What can you do for her at this point?

vivaladiva:

i swear y do people drag religion into every god damn thing, it makes me feel so ill

you have every reason to ignore it as much as others have a reason to bring their faith into their discussions.

platinumnk:

@pro01- lemme tell you why I feel that way
I had a best friend, very beautiful, we were inseperable during school days till we grad but we were still close
She met a guy during high school that was very rugged and I told her from the start that he was a bad apple
but she still dated him , I guess because he was cute

So I went off to further my studies, she stayed with him in a relationship
Everytime I tried to encourage her to branch out with education, he was always  irritated that I would talk to her.

He proposed to her 4 years ago, and she wanted to marry him, so she "submitted" to everything he told her to do, without questioning; including talking to me, a girl that was like my sister years before he met her!

I was hurt, but what can i do? She took her man over me, so I brushed it off and moved on.

now 4 year later, she is calling me for advice and finally furthering her education why?

Because the man she submitted herself to cheats and gave her two children with no marriage.

I know this is not every situation, but in things like this where men can excersise authority simple because  "I said so" without any true reasoning can bite you in the long run.  

this story illustrates nothing. There are a thousand and one girls out there who are more controlling than their men who have kids out of wedlock with no future hanging around the street corners. There are also controlling men out their whose wives have wonderful careers and a great home.

The constant use of ONE isolated unrelated example to make a general deduction reduces the quality of this debate IMO.