If I have to wait till they "see" till I make my choice, then I'm not responsible enough to take a wife. Marriage would be strictly my choice... M well trained, so I won't stray far from what they consider ideal!

misreal:
the truth is, when your parents kick against your spouse.dont be quick to say they do not know what they are saying..
Except they are just being tribalistic, greedy or just bossy and picky.your parents advice shoudnt be ignored oh..

At least you get my point. I stated it there that I won't listen to them if they are being tribal about it.

Very simple. At the end I'll make my own decision cos finally, everyone has his or her own life to live!
But I'll put their advice into SERIOUS consideration (cos they know way more than I do)

MadeINchenzen2:
lol. pesin wey dem knack jazz go still think say im know wetin im dey do !

That not always the situation bt if that was the case ur parents opinion won’t work either now. Na jazz go dey work

lequama10:
so because it happens to your uncle, it's automatically will happen to you right? Shit happens my brother. Your mom can advice you will always know better only if you ignore the signs. God help with your choices..

Bro it happened to my uncle, it will happen to me if I decide to marry a single mom. My uncle's parents kicked against his marriage because my uncle was young and vibrant and decided to marry someone older than him who is a single mom with kids already!

I get to decide who I spend the rest of my life with.

First of all listing to your parents reason. Then think about it, if is not going to be easy, especially, when you guys are in love and understand each other. Parents can be wrong, but at most they are 7o% correct. But if their reason is because of class, I mean, your parents are rich and her parents is not, or her parents is rich and yours aren't and don't want you to associate with the rich girl. You maybe disagree with them.
Take time to ask your parents their reasons and also tell them more about your partner. I think you will come to terms

If going against their wish is the best decision ever, so be it. But I have an amazing mom!

vinceobe:
MOST MARRIAGES WITHOUT PARENTAL SUPPORT, AGREEMENTS AND BLESSINGS, ALMOST ALWAYS END IN REGRETS AND UNMITIGATED DISASTER. IF THE INEVITABLE HAPPENS, YOU HAVE NO PLACE TO RUN TO AND YOUR PARENTS WILL SAY: " DID I NOT WARN YOU"? SO GET YOUR PARENTAL BLESSINGS FOR YOUR MARRIAGE. YOU HEAR ME SO. THE WORDS OF OUR ELDERS ARE WORDS OF WISDOM. WHATEVER AN OLD PERSON SEES WHILE LYING DOWN, A CHILD WILL NEVER SEE EVEN WHEN HE OR SHE CLIMBS THE TALLEST IROKO.

God bless u, don't mind those ones.let them b talking thrash all in d name of civilization, many of them still believe in Bollywood forgeting that reality is different.

Kweensavvy:



One day, you'll be alone.. All alone with your wife. Not your parents.

Yes but they will always be my parents

CAPSLOCKED:
SADLY, THE TOOTHLESS YOUTHS OF TODAY HARDLY THINK OR MAKE DECISIONS FOR THEMSELVES.

THEY LET THESE OLD CARGOES MAKE THEIR ENTIRE LIFE PLANS FOR THEM BECAUSE OF THE DUMB SAYING THAT "WHAT AN ELDER CAN SEE WHILE SITTING, A YOUNG MAN WILL NEVER SEE EVEN WHEN HE CLIMBS A MOUNTAIN". RUBBISH. HOW CAN AN OLD FARMER WHO HAS NEVER LEFT THE HUTS IN YOUR VILLAGE KNOW MORE THAN AN EDUCATED, EXPERIENCED MODERN PERSON LIKE YOU WHO HAS BEEN TO SEVERAL PARTS OF THE WORLD?

MANY PARENTS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR CHILDREN'S BAD MARRIAGES AND CERTAIN CALAMITIES. THEY'VE LIVED THEIR LIVES. WILL YOU LET THEM LIVE YOURS?

I wish I can like your comment 200 times. I've always found that proverb dumb too but people think I'm not being respectful. A wise parent will consider his/her children view point acknowledging that they could know more and be more in some aspects of life.

The bolded assertion below is untrue and very debatable, especially when you consider that a good number of Igbos cultivate and support baby factory business as though normal in their culture.

What about the role of inheritance by Igbo women?

Also, what of a woman’s treatment at the demise of the Igbo husband?

This doesn’t mean there are no positive attributes that can be observed of Igbos and their tradition. It just simply means that every tribe / people have their own way of showing value and protection for their families, hence every tribe has its pros and cons, and we should all strive to imbibe the right qualities regardless of tribe.

Finally, what’s your opinion about Davido and Chioma’s marriage? Can we also juxtapose that with your opinion about Peter Okoye and Lola’s marriage? I’m almost certain that your opinions about these 2 marriages would conflict.

Therefore, let’s be guided when we make blanket statements about a whole tribe, because the same measure that you use would be returned to you; even worse!

Lovelyn451:
I will never support Yoruba-Igbo marriage, Yoruba don't value family like the Igbo's.abeg abeg, you guys should keep marrying ur women biko

As long as the pu$$¥ is gud!!!! Hell Yeah

Michellekabod2:
my parents have always insisted we marry our fellow Igbos yet only Yoruba guys come for me

Yoruba guys love Igbos especially if u are light skin

Why do poeple even get married?

Neroiam:
Your wish should be thiers' also... No be dem go stay with the woman.
They can advise but the decision is solely yours to make.
This is 21st century... Nobody dey marry for person nowadays

That's true. It's just like committing suicide, no matter how much advice given to you; you feel it's your life and you can decide to end it all.

If they're being sentimental, (yeah I'll know if they are, I've lived with them long enough to know) then I'll go ahead and get married.

Omar09:
I will listen to my parents especially my mom if she has a valid reason that has nothing to do with Tribalism.


My uncle when he wanted to get married brought home a woman who was very beautiful, but his mom refused saying she's a single mom with kids tho his mom was just seeing the woman for the first time. Long story short, my uncle went ahead with the marriage and today....! He is wrecked! By the same woman his mom warned him about. He's mom's late (rest her soul). Now my uncle just found out this year that his wife had five kids for the first husband.

Now tell me why I shouldn't listen to my parents?

How can he go ahead to marry another man's problem?
single mom is a no no, unless a man is ready to accept his faith.

No matter what, seeing her kids, reminds her what went through in the first marriage or her mistakes..

MrBrownJay1:
unless you want to spend the rest of your life with your parents, there comes a time in your life when you have to make your own decisions (and stand by them regardless of what anyone believes)

Gbayi

Parents might not be always right but they know the results of being wrong, once had a gf I dated for a year and some month d very first day my mom saw her, she told me she has given birth before but has a very foolish wise guy I no believe until after we broke lo and behold na she get the last born of their family, � � crazy right, abeg try to check and balance your parents point of view it's necessary especially for a guy, those females understand themselves better

Hmmmmm, as a matter of fact, I am passing through this phase right nw, and I can testify that it isn't a good experience at all. My fiance's father stood against our union completely...

CAPSLOCKED:
SADLY, THE TOOTHLESS YOUTHS OF TODAY HARDLY THINK OR MAKE DECISIONS FOR THEMSELVES.

THEY LET THESE OLD CARGOES MAKE THEIR ENTIRE LIFE PLANS FOR THEM BECAUSE OF THE DUMB SAYING THAT "WHAT AN ELDER CAN SEE WHILE SITTING, A YOUNG MAN WILL NEVER SEE EVEN WHEN HE CLIMBS A MOUNTAIN". RUBBISH. HOW CAN AN OLD FARMER WHO HAS NEVER LEFT THE HUTS IN YOUR VILLAGE KNOW MORE THAN AN EDUCATED, EXPERIENCED MODERN PERSON LIKE YOU WHO HAS BEEN TO SEVERAL PARTS OF THE WORLD?

MANY PARENTS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR CHILDREN'S BAD MARRIAGES AND CERTAIN CALAMITIES. THEY'VE LIVED THEIR LIVES. WILL YOU LET THEM LIVE YOURS?

parents are always right AN ELDER CAN SEE WHILE SITTING, A YOUNG MAN WILL NEVER SEE EVEN WHEN HE CLIMBS A MOUNTAIN". it has happened to me brother

I listen to my parents but I make the final decisions for myself ..

It’s their opinion and sometimes opinions are tainted by a biased position so I would look at all angles...

It’s like marrying a cheater since you accept the cheating he will continue and even be smarter on handling it but a no nonsense approach the man go duck when he see you...no need to slap anybody or pour water or them

I’m not saying make your spouse scared of you as a woman but rant Well Well ...they don’t like pressure at all and that is putting the fear of God in his heart

they dont have another option, than to agree, i'm the one to live with the lady, not them...

There's this lady I used to be in love with , but her dad hates me badly
He said he doesn't wanna even hear name
He's from kwara and I'm from Edo state, funny enough he married an edo woman who happens to be the mother of this girl
It wasn't an easy task, she tried all she could to convince the man though , but he wouldn't budge
A time came this girl just stopped talking to me, mehn I just generated this huge hatred for her, cuz we promised never to give up on each other cuz even the mom was never against us being together, it's just the father

CAPITAL YES... I have done everything in my power to be a good child to my parent, been there for them being the first child. Our parents are fond of discriminating when it comes to choosing a partner they can say you can`t marry her because she is of particular type, particular religion or for some reasons that are meaningless to me. I want to take responsibility of whatever the outcome of my marriage be it positive or negative. I don`t want to point finger or cursing anyone in future for a failed or sorrowful marriage. I used to tell my parent and even my family that whoever i bring home to marry they should not question me but accept her. They know what i can do which is what i will do... Aside marriage or choosing partner, i don`t disrespect my parent deprive them of what they could get from me.

MadeINchenzen2:
perhaps it could be reasons honed from love... perhaps it could be reasons that has to do with his or her money.

what will you do if your parents refuses to give you their consent or permission to go on and marry that guy or lady?

Omar09:
I will listen to my parents especially my mom if she has a valid reason that has nothing to do with Tribalism.


My uncle when he wanted to get married brought home a woman who was very beautiful, but his mom refused saying she's a single mom with kids tho his mom was just seeing the woman for the first time. Long story short, my uncle went ahead with the marriage and today....! He is wrecked! By the same woman his mom warned him about. He's mom's late (rest her soul). Now my uncle just found out this year that his wife had five kids for the first husband.

Now tell me why I shouldn't listen to my parents?

U dey mind dem?

While good parents/elders (earthly angels) might not be learned, globally exposed nor good in grammar, science or technology, when it comes to this thing called "marriage"; a wise person who dearly loves his/her future will not take their words for granted.

It's highly pathetic seeing some comments negating the fact that parent can give advice to their children on marriage issue, is it because of civilization?
Without giving a thought that their opinion might be valid or not.

But just a reminder this parent are the one that brought you up ever since your childhood and will forever want best for you( in most cases) but if you notice any king of stereotypes in them then you have to let them understand but not just by saying they don't have a say.


But above all, remember, if you insist that your parent cannot have a say to whom you're to marry then it becomes a seed you too cannot say anything to your children when they want to marry about their respective spouses.


Many of us are hypocrite, those set of people will begin to set limits for their children in the future saying you cannot marry that girl it below my standard and all the stuff like you can't marry now not until you finish your PhD.

9gerian:
The bolded assertion below is untrue and very debatable, especially when you consider that a good number of Igbos cultivate and support baby factory business as though normal in their culture.

What about the role of inheritance by Igbo women?

Also, what of a woman’s treatment at the demise of the Igbo husband?

This doesn’t mean there are no positive attributes that can be observed of Igbos and their tradition. It just simply means that every tribe / people have their own way of showing value and protection for their families, hence every tribe has its pros and cons, and we should all strive to imbibe the right qualities regardless of tribe.

Finally, what’s your opinion about Davido and Chioma’s marriage? Can we also juxtapose that with your opinion about Peter Okoye and Lola’s marriage? I’m almost certain that your opinions about these 2 marriages would conflict.

Therefore, let’s be guided when we make blanket statements about a whole tribe, because the same measure that you use would be returned to you; even worse!

The main thing is that not everyone is open to inter tribal marriages that's why many parents are against it.
Sometimes it carries so much risk and wahala.
Many will claim in this modern age that culture doesn't matter, but of course culture does matter. Especially

Moreover most of the thing we call love is very fleeting, it doesn't last. So one has to be careful.

As for Davido/peter relationships, igbo men rarely marry that far. And families will kick against it. Unlike women may be allowed. But for guys it's very rare. Except an igbo man Who grew up outside his culture. But those ones that grew within there culture it's rare because the two cultures are way apart.

I will rather follow my own decisions incase he went bad i will not blame any body

Dreyton36:
There's this lady I used to be in love with , but her dad hates me badly
He said he doesn't wanna even hear name
He's from kwara and I'm from Edo state, funny enough he married an edo woman who happens to be the mother of this girl
It wasn't an easy task, she tried all she could to convince the man though , but he wouldn't budge
A time came this girl just stopped talking to me, mehn I just generated this huge hatred for her, cuz we promised never to give up on each other cuz even the mom was never against us being together, it's just the father

Sometimes one can't go against the parents wishes. It happened to my sister. A lawyer guy was coming for her, she was crazy in love but my dad no one use ear hear am. My sister na medical doctor.
The guy tried but no way. My sister finally cut off from the guy. I thought she will go crazy.

Finally she married a guy my dad fully accepted. And she is having a good marriage with this present guy. In fact the guy has been supporting and encouraging her to reach her highest dream and ambition which not all men will do.

Parents do have a great say because what we modern people call love is very fickle, doesn't last. It takes more than love to make marriage work. So parents understand these things.