The joke about the abortion pill was cool but the one abt the toilet and its 4 buttons left me crossing my legs vert tight and im not even a guy!!!!

XoXo86:

The joke about the abortion pill was cool but the one abt the toilet and its 4 buttons left me crossing my legs vert tight and im not even a guy!!!!

lol i undastand how u feel sowieee. u can open your legs now d guy has forgottn about his sorrows, #LIFEMUSTCONTINUE

Laugh your sorrow out: Husband files 4 divorce, judge asks d
reason? Husband replies, me no cum, she no cum, baby come, how
come?

An American, a Japanese, and a
Nigerian were sitting Unclad in
the sauna. Suddenly there is a
beeping sound.
The American presses his forearm
and the beeping stops. The others
look at him questioningly. "That's
my pager," he says. "I have a
microchip under the skin of my
arm."
A few minutes later a phone rings.
The Japanese lifts his palm to his
ear. When he finishes he explains,
"That's my mobile I have a
microchip in my hand."
The Nigerian, feeling decidedly
low-tech but not to be outdone,
decided he had to do something
just as impressive.
He steps out of the sauna and
goes to the toilet. He returns with
a piece of toilet paper hanging
from his butt. The others raised
their eyebrows and said, "Wow!
What's that?"
"I'm getting a Fax," he explains.

SON: Daddy, daddy Barca beat
Manchester United last night!
DADDY: It wasn't Barca. it was
Basel; they just wore Barca jerseys
to scare Manchester United, :-)

A lady with large boobs enters a bus. She has a rosary around her neck wit d cross in btw her big breast and d guy sitting beside her can't just stop starring at her. Realizing dt he had been starring for over 10 minutes, d lady, touching d rosary asks d guy; "Are you looking at Jesus Christ who was crucified on d cross?" The guy replies; "No, I'm actually looking at the two thieves crucified beside Him" lolz!

kingron:

A lady with large bosoms enters a bus. She has a rosary around her neck wit d cross in btw her big bosom and d guy sitting beside her can't just stop starring at her. Realizing dt he had been starring for over 10 minutes, d lady, touching d rosary asks d guy; "Are you looking at Jesus Christ who was crucified on d cross?" The guy replies; "No, I'm actually looking at the two thieves crucified beside Him" lolz!

PINGING CHAT
Charmer:::: Hello Sweet Girl
Sweetgal:::: Hi Lover Boy!
Charmer:::: Can I know you more
please?
Sweetgal:::: 17, female, sweet
lips,
bootylicious and Delicious, in Port
Harcourt
and you?
Charmer:::: Mmmmmh, I am in love
already.
I’m 52, male, 6 pack, big Chest,
Port Harcourt.
Sweetgal:::: You're 52? OMG!
Serious . Same
age as my dad.
Charmer:::: I’m just so into fresh
young
beautiful girls.
Sweetgal:::: Do you have a wife?
Charmer:::: Yes, but not as sexy
as you, I have
a daughter, she is in her
bedroom with her
friend doing homework.
Sweetgal:::: Then why do you like
young girls?
Charmer:::: I love them because
they are
beautiful not to mention sexy
and with fresh
boobs and booty
Sweetgal:::: I am also into older
men with
iPhones, ipads, cash and driving
expensive
cars.
Charmer:::: I can offer all of that
and even
more. Sweetgal:::: I think we
should meet
because you are in Port
harcourt and I am
also here.
Charmer:::: That would be nice,
where do I
pick you up tomorrow with my
new G-guard
sexy girl?
Sweetgal:::: Tomorrow I am going
to school it
won’t be possible.
Charmer:::: Or maybe over the
weekend,
going to school is very
important.
Sweetgal:::: While still chatting let
me continue
with my homework I don’t want
my dad to
know that i have a BB, he will
be mad at me.
Charmer:::: Which homework is
that? maybe I
can assist you.
Sweetgal:::: It's a Biology
assignment and my
friend Lucy is assisting me
Charmer:::: Hey, your friend’s
name is Lucy?
Sweetgal:::: Yes.
Charmer:::: Exactly where in Port
Harcourt are
you?
Sweetgal:::: Woji and you?
Charmer:::: Mercy!!! is that
you
Sweetgal:::: Dad, is that yo

If U have a boyfriend/girl friend U aren't treating right and you are proudly playing i love MY BABY by wizkid na GOD go ___ punish you amen!!!!!

An old woman has a daughter who lives abroad bt she cannot afford 3square meals a day,1 day d landlord visited d woman and asked her,y are u strugglin to eat wen u ave a child abroad,d old woman replies don't mind dat gal upon al d moni we spent on her,she is only sendin me photograph wit white men,pls can i c d photo,d woman brought it out and it was[b] dollars[/b] ,if u were d landlord wat wil u do?talk true o

An Innocent boy asking: mom why my cousin's name is Jasmin

Mom: because your aunt loves flowers

Son: mom what do you love?

Mom: Dickyy stop asking me such stupid questions =)) =D

^^^

so na here u com dey hide abi, com mk i yab u for 'yab me i yab u'

DONkollione:

[size=15pt]this guy u just mount photocopying machine inside this ya thread , serious C n P dey go on here. see heat na i dey sweat,  [/size]

Ah!!! u dey sweat, abeg no vex ooo my A.C don spoil nd dis photocoy machine is designed to bring Heat, make i fan u. #pelemabinu

^^

houseboy, pls fan me mi o binu

^^

Laff it out!!
A lady went to the police station to file a report for her missing Husband,
Lady : I lost my Husband
Inspector : What is his height, ??
Lady : I never noticed
Inspector : Slim or healthy, ??
Lady : Not slim can be healthy
Inspector : Color of eyes, ??
Lady : Never noticed
Inspector : Color of hair, ??
Lady : Changes according to season
Inspector : What was he wearing, ??
Lady : suit/casuals I don’t remember exactly
Inspector : Was somebody with him??
Lady : Yes my Labrador dog, Calvin,tied with a golden chain, height 26 inches, healthy, blue eyes, blackish brown hair, his left foot thumb nail is slightly broken, he never barks, wearing a golden belt studded with blue balls, he likes non veg food, we eat together, we jog together & the lady started crying
Inspector : Let’s search for the dog first

Boy: So, sex at my place?

Girl: Yeah!

Boy: OK, but I sleep in a
, bunk bed with my
younger brother and he
thinks we're making
sandwiches so this is the
code.
Cheese= Faster.
Tomato= Harder.

Girl: OK?

~Later~

Girl: CHEESE CHEESE
TOMATO CHEESE!

Brother: Stop making
sandwiches! You're getting
mayo all over my bed!
:oLAFF IT OUT oo!!!

"Doc, I think my son has gonorrhea," a patient
told his urologist on the phone. "The only
woman he's screwed is our maid."
"Ok, don't be hard on him. He's just a kid," the
medic soothed. "Get him in here right away
and I'll take care of him."
"But, Doc. I've been screwing the maid too and
I've got the same symptoms he has."
"Then you come in with him and I'll fix you
both up." Replied the doctor. "Well," the man
admitted, " I think my wife
now has it too."
"Son of a biatch!" the physician roared. "That
means we've all got it!"

wife:I'm going 2 LONDON.What gift do u want??

husband:One British girl,

wife returns from LONDON ,
,
,
husband:Where is my gift??

wife: Wait for 9 months,

What did the cockroach say to the man who wanted to squash it? You're just jealous,because I can make your wife scream louder than you can!!!

^^^

guy dis one u dey full here with jokes when boko haram show i wonder how u wan take run,









nyc joke but ya photocopying machine dey produce too much heat

DONkollione:

^^^

guy dis one u dey full here with jokes when boko haram show i wonder how u wan take run,









nyc joke but ya photocopying machine dey produce too much heat

wait y u dey beef ma photocopying machine , abi u dey plan stel am?

^^^^

u funny oo, continue ya good work oo no mind me, na part of flexibility

Eee oo king na u na u na u ewoooo, dey jolly dey go ur head scata scenee.Omo bado don miss jokes sect small o, am bck y'all get ready to cellotape ur ribs

welcome back ooo.wetin u bring come for us

^she pours schnapps on d floor*

Guy I bringeth all kinds of shepe, austrialian shepe,brazlian shepe,cambodia shepe,belarus shepe,fiji shepe baba name it I brought it.Oya begin jogodo "oh nana oooo ooooo la alagba do ooo,for areaa wey we dey u go ji soro ooooo, eeeee di di ooo".

Ya like my re-dubb

^^yeeee!! O jigbijigbijigbi,emi ni kan tan, ore your head dey dere jo.

LAAAF IT OUT !!!
16years old jane told her mom she was pregnant, Her mom questioned her in tears!
Mom ; who's responsible?
Jane ; my class teacher
Mom ; what did i tell u abt sex?
Jane ; you said wen someone touches my breasts, i should say " DON'T " and when someone touches my BomBom i should say" STOP ",
MoM ; so what happened,, aw come about this?
Jane ;He was touching my breastsand bombom at the same time so i told him " DON'T STOP " DON'T STOP"

An eldery Naija patient gets hearing aids from a doctor. After short time, he meets the doctor again.

Doctor, "Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased."
Patient, "Oh, I am in a funny situation now. I haven't told my family yet. I just sit and listen to their conversations. In a month, I've changed my will three times!"

i neva knew what i was missing here, gud wk