Swaziland has launched a crackdown on
high-flying witches after banning them from
hovering above 150metres.
It has been a long time since witches were
burnt at the stake in Europe but the
accusation remains a serious one in the
landlocked African country.
Anyone caught flying their broomstick above
the height limit faces arrest and a hefty
R500,000 fine, the country’s civil aviation
authorities said this week.
‘A witch on a broomstick should not fly above
the [150-metre] limit,’ corporate affairs
director Sabelo Dlamini told The Star.
The new aviation law was highlighted after a
private investigator was caught flying a
helicopter equipped with a video camera to
gather surveillance information.
Witchcraft is taken seriously in Swaziland
where many people believe in the power of
black magic.
Last year a leading Swazi MP called for a hike
in tax paid by witch doctors to help ease the
cash-strapped country’s financial woes.
but not for transport.

As I scrolled down my Twitter timeline today,
my eyes got stuck on a post by a news site:
"World Bank Stops Concessionary Loans To
Nigeria: Says Nigeria Is Not A Poor Country".
It is amazing that it took this eminent
financial institution so long to appreciate
this childishly simple fact. It is glaring even
to the most unlettered citizen that Nigeria is a
country cursed by abundance. Africa is
cursed not by Ham's naked father but by its
long history of opulence.
Let us take a trip into the days before the
imaginary lines were drawn, when the
sculptors of this entity we call our country
themselves were not yet conceived. Land was
abundant and fertile; the weather was
favourable. Yes, there was disease and the
attendant deaths but the fecundity of the
African woman (and the insatiable polygamy
of our male forebears) ensured a thriving
population. Surviving childhood in Africa
required special hereditary endowments
and God's Grace. The African adult was a
specimen of the purest Darwinist process.
There was a problem though. There was no
hunger to drive the black man's industry; no
winter to compel a search for energy sources;
and no land scarcity to encourage the
seafaring ways of the Caucasian wanderers.
This abundance of resources and absence of
challenges led to a stagnation of ideas and
invention. Eden was perfect and needed no
innovations.
Fast-forward four hundred years into the
future from this idyllic time . The streets
bustle with industrious people squeezing out
their survival from the crumbs that escape
the Swiss accounts. Land remains abundant
but wasted. Luxury cars ply the pothole-
ridden roads of the "cities" where drainages
with missing covers flank mansions with
massive fences and steel gates. Above,
private jets and helicopters move the
menagerie of politicians across the sunny
skies.
In Nigeria, precious, "sweet" crude oil
pumped with ease from below lubricates the
greasy wheels of corruption and poisons the
poor man's fish. The country is in trouble,
yes, but poor?
A country that produced a Soyinka and an
Achebe is not poor.
A country that exports $97.5 BILLION and has
an external reserve of $50 BILLION is not
poor.
A country where the governors and
legislators earn more than the President of
the United States is not poor.
A country that spends N9.4 BILLION annually
on champagne is not poor.
Our problem is the curse of abundance of
resources which our looting leaders believe
they are entitled to (after all, politics here is a
dirty and deadly game).
The World Bank has been fuelling
corruption, not development, in Africa.
Nigeria does not need any loans; it does not
make economic nor common sense to pour
water into a leaking pot. What Nigeria needs
is sincere leadership that will efficiently use
the human and material resources that this
ungrateful nation has been blessed with.
We have the resources to bail out the World
Bank if necessary.
S0 NO MORE LOANS, GRANTS OR AIDS!

Your genotype should not be any employer's business until you have been duly employed.

I just saw these tweets and knew you all would get a kick out of them too!

1. RT @NigeriaNewsdesk: The Federal High Court, Kaduna, has sentenced 2 persons, Ifeanyi Echebiri & Sylvester Okoli, to 7 years imprisonment each over a N33m fraud.

2. RT @NigeriaNewsdesk: An Osun Court has sentenced a 31-yr-old man, Kelvin Igha-Igbodalo, to 45 years imprisonment for stealing Gov Aregbesola's Sony Ericson phone

It appears the rule is the bigger the crime, the shorter the time! Learned brothers and sisters, help me out. Is there something I'm missing?

Selah.

I just saw this tweets and knew you all would get a kick out of them too!

1. RT @NigeriaNewsdesk: The Federal High Court, Kaduna, has sentenced 2 persons, Ifeanyi Echebiri & Sylvester Okoli, to 7 years imprisonment each over a N33m fraud.

2. RT @NigeriaNewsdesk: An Osun Court has sentenced a 31-yr-old man, Kelvin Igha-Igbodalo, to 45 years imprisonment for stealing Gov Aregbesola's Sony Ericson phone

It appears the rule is the bigger the crime, the shorter the time! Learned brothers and sisters, help me out. Is there something I'm missing?

Selah.

alutacontinua: In conclusion, when a girl totally loses her sense because of u!

SMH

I agree. One might as well get a robot. She also may be setting you up for the big fall. PS: not to be unduly obnoxious, the spelling is "lose" not "loose". Another point for alutacontinua.

English: asswipe
Pidgin: mumu
Bini: Ohzuhor
Hausa: Wawa or Dohloh
Yoruba: Ohlohdoh
Ibo:

Corruption kills. Their blood is on the heads of all the embezzlers and fake contractors!

And I thought only Edo girls did such stuff...smh

Both adverts featured actors who obviously were not Nigerians despite their efforts at mimicry. For me, Udeme resonated better.

FXKing2012: Wole Soyinka started cultism in Nigerian tertiary institutions which has led to loss of countless young lives.

Confraternities exist globally and are generally harmless. The question u should ask is "why must una own for Naija be different?"

shawylux: Serious kids

Forget serious! D Old fellow sabi flex!

Tested and trusted options:
1. Dettol
2. Hypo! The ultimate solution.
3. Battery acid