thanx brother. do i get some $ for it?
here is one for you:

One couple is discussing about their past, present and future.
The husband asks his wife: “If I die, with whom you will stay?”
Wife replied with sad mood: “With my sister”.
Then Wife also asked to Husband: “With whom you will stay if I died?”
Husband replied: “I will stay with your sister too.”

Thanx scottN. try this one:

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words
women use a day… 30,000 compared to a man’s 15,000.
The wife replied, “The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men…"
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, ” What?”

Pinku tells her husband, “Pappu, that young couple that
just moved in next door seem such a loving twosome.
Every morning, when he leaves the house, he kisses her
goodbye, and every evening when he comes home, he
brings her a dozen roses.
Now, why can’t you do that?”

“Gosh,” Pappu says, “Why? I hardly know the girl!”

Here.

A couple drove down a country road for several miles,
not saying a word with each other. An earlier discussion
had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position.

As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, “Relatives of yours?”
“Yep ,” the wife replied, “In-laws.”

So I can act as a go-in-between, to merge JJC and Projan?
The way I operate is such that I don't want divisions in the house.
Peace and reconciliation is the way foward.
So let's all unite.

That picture reminds me of this story(not a Joke)

IN THE NEWS

A Harare woman Alice Gumbe has been arrested for feeding her chichens with the life prolonging drug commonly known as ARVs.

In a stunning confession, the woman said she would grind the popurlar pills and dissolve it in water which the chickens will drink on.

The chickens are extra- ordinarilly big with some reportedly weighing almost 10Kgs.

The woman was arrested after the police was tipped off by anonymus members of the public.

Meanwhile, the police have urged members of the public not to buy meat from unscruplous business people!!! .

when my daughter was 5 years old, we met a dwarf.
then she says, "daddy, look, here is an old man acting
like a small boy!" she was looking at him in the eyes.

I was so taken unaware that i just opened my mouth
in disbelief and could'nt say anything.
the man just commended, "kids!", and went
away, laughing.

@ bunmioguns. thanx brother. Sure enough i will join them.
forging friendship is the basis of good communication.
How do i join and is Projan a club? please school me.

Thanx for the advice Zilja

thanx Ekeroyal. here we go again,

The manager of an Irish club was talking to a young player who had applied for
a trial with the club. 'Do you kick with both feet?' asked the manager.
'Don't be silly!' said the trialist. 'If I did that, I wouldn't be able to
stand up, would I!’

Thanx Kine, here is another

Judge Judy to prostitute: 'So when did you realize you were raped?'
Prostitute, wiping away tears: 'When the check bounced.'

Happily Married
“Now, that looks like a happily married couple,” remarked the husband.
“Don’t be too sure, my Dear.” replied his wife. “They’re probably saying
the same thing about us.”

how?

How private is private? Can I not answer my spouse’s
cellphone when it is just next to me? Are there any
secrets that might be revealed in the messages?
Space, yes, and I should not be eavesdropping
whenever she is on the phone.
But how much space should be given in a marriage?

Fred and Tina were thrilled when their long wait to adopt a
baby finally came to an end. The adoption center called and
told them they had an adorable German baby boy and the
couple took him without hesitation.
On the way home from the adoption center, they stopped at
the local college so they could enroll in night classes. After
they completed filling out the form, the registrar inquired,
"What possessed you to study German?"
"We've just adopted a wonderful German baby boy and in a
year or so, he'll begin to talk. We want to make sure we would
be able to understand him!" the couple proudly explained.

Girlfriend : It’s 2 tight
Boyfriend : Don’t worry, I’ll put it slowly,

Girlfriend : Push it in,
Boyfriend : Ah, I can’t,

Girlfriend : It’s painful,
Boyfriend : Forget it.
.
.
.
.
We’ll buy new WEDDING RING!

the second one was good

let's see this one;

Married ladies,

Once there were three Ladies. First Lady:-
My husband's hair colour is Black, So i will
wear Black Dress for tomorrow Party.

Second Lady:-My husband's hair colour is Yellow,
So i will wear yellow Dress for tomorrow Party.

Third Lady questioned: My Husband is bald, So what should I !!!

jokes ain' supposed to be explained. this was an arranged
date through a dating agency.
a last one for the day;

What i would do for you.


I'd cross the hottest dessert, I'd swim the deepest sea, I'd climb the highest mountain,
But i can't come over tonight because its raining,

have a good evening

we don see you means we haven't seen you is that correct!

let's mislead again

You Took Me Home, Took My Top Off And You Put Your Lips All Over Me.
Thank God I’m onl a Fanta.

whau, that,s good. grade this one;

Blind Dates
After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date.
Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him at the restaurant so he would
have an excuse to leave if something like this happened. When he returned to the table,
he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died."
"Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!"

let's add this one as well!

I want to suck you, lick you, wanna move my tongue all over you, wanna feel you in my mouth, yep, that's how u, eat an ice cream!

Let's see how misleading, this one is!


Biology Class
The 10th grade teacher asks Jessica: "What part of the human body increases to
10 times it's normal size when excited?"
Jessica responds: "That's disgusting! I don't have to answer that question!"
So the teacher asks little Johnny, who responds: "That's easy, the pupil of the eye."
"That's correct, Johnny. Very good!"
And turning to Jessica, she says: "I've three things to say to you, young lady, first,
you didn't do your homework; second, you have a dirty mind; and third, you're in for
a big disappointment!"

now it's your turn otooro. give me one A++ joke .

ha ha that's funny.

funny

An English professor wrote the words,
"woman without her man is nothing" on the blackboard
and directed the students to punctuate it correctly.

The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing."
The women wrote: "Woman! Without her, man is nothing."