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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! (42041 Views)
As A Husband, Or Wife, Who Will You Make Your Next Of Kin / Why You Should Be Careful In Choosing Your Next Of Kin (Photos) / My Brother In Law (sister's Husby) Is Becoming Too Rude For My Liking... (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by tete7000(m): 9:50am On Mar 18, 2015 |
kendrick9: And what makes it insensible to make a wife one's next of kin? That you don't trust your wife to do so doesn't mean others don't. It is all about upbringing, social conditioning and one's view of what a marriage is. If I may tell you, I find it senseless too to live with a wife I can't bequeath my life to. I would rather die unmarried than have a wife who isn't worthy of being my next of kin. 7 Likes |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Nobody: 9:50am On Mar 18, 2015 |
nedu2000: If it is true that she made about 60%contribution to the cost of the house. Regardless it is her sweat and she deserves to enjoy it. You are very selfish and I don't like selfish people. @op if you have proof that you made about 60% contribution to the cost of the house (like receipts of building materials etc). You are 50% lucky. Talk to him and if he refuses to change it. You can always go to court with your evidences. He could have used his children rather he chose his brother. I am still finding hard to understand how some people can be so selfish. Selfish people deserve no empathy 4 Likes |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by mekybabe1: 9:50am On Mar 18, 2015 |
Kindly check the date on these docs to ascertain if it was done b4 marrying you, then sit down and talk to him. 1 Like |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Youngzedd(m): 9:51am On Mar 18, 2015 |
@OP You have a questionable character. Take it or leave it. What will make a man not to use his wife as beneficiary. Odikwa very risky Oooooo. |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Nobody: 9:52am On Mar 18, 2015 |
Most women can be very annoying, even if they have kids the man has his reasons best known to him,contributors may have listed his reasons on the thread. She claims to have contributed 60% Take a true life scenario that happened to me: Scenario 1 ME: Police stopped me ooh, they wanna arrest me for no reason GF/Wife: You too, what did u do, when u never sit@home and u sneak out, settle them. Scenario 2 Me: Police stopped me ooh,they wanna arrest me for no reason. Brother: How come?, Calm down,which area?you know its Xmas season. I am on my Way let me call my lawyer friend. They will know there laws in this country. Its all who will be there for us in time of need 1 Like |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Nobody: 9:52am On Mar 18, 2015 |
Hmm. Shiite just got real. I don't think I can share an account with my husband o. Make everybody run him private account biko. Of course borrowing is allowed. 1 Like |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by kendrick9(m): 9:52am On Mar 18, 2015 |
tete7000:God forbid the man dies,then the woman later get married to another man? honestly i tink its a foolish idea especially if u hav kids |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by braine(m): 9:52am On Mar 18, 2015 |
Dyt: *sighs* |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Missmossy(f): 9:52am On Mar 18, 2015 |
Despite your contribution, something seems sinister. You both should talk It out. |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by marveluxbe(m): 9:53am On Mar 18, 2015 |
BritneyStacy: Right now am still single, all my next of Kin details have either my brothers name or my mother. May be he used his brother as next of Kin before you married him. 1 Like |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by preshy223(f): 9:53am On Mar 18, 2015 |
woman, u r still yet to ans all d qustns asked. maybe u wud start getting beta rooms to solutns wen u ans d qustn. but in all,its well. |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Dyt(f): 9:53am On Mar 18, 2015 |
braine: Heaves |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by DivineU: 9:54am On Mar 18, 2015 |
Do you have a child? If yes, then that is very bad of your husband. From my interaction with men, most of them use their child/children as next of kin not their wife/wives. |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Nobody: 9:54am On Mar 18, 2015 |
Billyonaire:what happens to the vows of two shall be one? Why should the wife not be next of kin? My dad is one in a million then, he made my mum next of kin despite having male and female children, his reasoning is that, when he dies, my mum should decide to do whatever she wants with what he has, leaving it with the children though good but doesn't want my mum to be at the mercy of anyone, not even his children. I think a man should protect his wife against all odds. 12 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Nafikowa: 9:54am On Mar 18, 2015 |
I really don't get some things here, how could a man delete his wife from all those? There is a problem really. Madam there are things you are not telling us. nedu2000: |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Nobody: 9:55am On Mar 18, 2015 |
TheRainmaker1:She contributed to the cost of the house. She wouldn't have done that if she did not trust him. If she had built a house without her husband's knowledge you will crucify her but as a good woman she instead spent in on their matrimonial home. It is unfair to deny her her right. 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by braine(m): 9:56am On Mar 18, 2015 |
Dyt: I tire for your matter ontop this Nairaland. Just go away jare. |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by nedu2000(m): 9:58am On Mar 18, 2015 |
Justfollowit:I bet. U she's exaggerated the property she owns,as par usual.....'Cos her hubby uses his money to buy her a car in her name doesn't mean she contributed to that piece of property I don't like. Selfish people either,besides its not as if he's going to his grave with all his money,he's gonna give it.out!! But not to his 'dear' wife |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Dyt(f): 9:58am On Mar 18, 2015 |
braine: Na wetin u wan tell the op be that? ![]() ![]() |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Terenceike(m): 9:59am On Mar 18, 2015 |
You just said you contributed over 60%, might be true or maybe a way to get readers on your side. That's bytheway. Now the truth is, no man uses his wife as next of kin (especially if he wants to have his family going even after death), no doubt he can will some properties to her. From the questions which you're yet to reply to, I assume you don't have a child yet, then if that's the case don't expect to be his next of kin of highest beneficiary of his property. Naturally we trust our siblings more than anyone else except in cases when they have done things that killed that trust. So his brother is the best bet for a next of kin when he hasn't got a kid yet. |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by NemzySeries(m): 10:02am On Mar 18, 2015 |
majekdom2:Ma guy dis is africa......ne b everybody read book abi na igbo man 4 village u wan go dey xplain will & nxt of kin to?......d woman simply nids help abeg.....long talk no dey cook rice |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by igbizen(m): 10:02am On Mar 18, 2015 |
diresimdi: this is true. it will be unfair to remarry with the mans property esp if the man is the bread winner of his extended family. Pls just pray that God give you children. But if no children then the man should make out the will in such a way as to benefit both the wife and his extended family. |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Nobody: 10:02am On Mar 18, 2015 |
firstEVA:In the event of death, the first son naturally becomes head of the family, with the assistance of the mother. Although first son is heir to estate, the mom is the manager of resources and the finances. This is not hatred, but a man has to protect himself from food poisoning when a woman catches him cheating. 1 Like |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by jaybee3(m): 10:04am On Mar 18, 2015 |
kendrick9:What's up with your warped reasoning bro? Who would you rather take care of the kids, the man's family or the woman who has always had equal responsibility to ensure the kids prosper? Please change your selfish mindset abeg 10 Likes |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by NobleG1(m): 10:06am On Mar 18, 2015 |
BritneyStacy: There are some reasons why a st*upid husband would do so; 1. Lack of trust for his wife. 2. His greedy extended family controls him. 3. Culture of his people. E.g Abiriba men Will everything to their extended family. 4. His love for you (if he had any) has faded. People Will things to someone they like or love. No matter his reason, you contributed to the house financially and deserve a refund as he removed you from the Will. Before you do that, please consult your lawyer. If you have the same lawyer with him, consult a different one. And make sure you go meet him or her with scanned coppies of the Will. It's very important. The lawyer will advise you on what to do. 6 Likes |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Nobody: 10:06am On Mar 18, 2015 |
Billyonaire:oh cheating is a compulsory thing for the man? 3 Likes |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Nobody: 10:06am On Mar 18, 2015 |
nedu2000: Someone is trying to be philosophical. ![]() He is not going to give it to his dear wife after her sacrifice. I pray you experience the same thing if you had partnered with someone with in good faith and confidence that the person would do right by you. Sorry, it is not a curse and this issue is not about husband and wife. It is about what is just and fair. If you had carefully read my post you would have realised that I based my opinion on what she claimed to have contributed. However you automatically assumed because she is a woman. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Terenceike(m): 10:07am On Mar 18, 2015 |
This story reminds me of a book by James Hadley Chase. A man assured his life with his wife being the beneficiary. The lady found out and automatically wished him death. She went every length to kill him and finally did. Though the clause on the contract prevented her from getting the compensation. So after reading that I realized it not so good a decision to embark on such journey. Your spouse might have other plans. Remember some couples are bonded by selfish interest or mere circumstance not necessarily love. |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Awoofawo(m): 10:08am On Mar 18, 2015 |
Not thing wrong in your husband making his brother or even sister his next of kin... It could even be that what you are fussing about now pre-date the time you meet/married him. Am my sister next of kin from the very time first she became aware, that there is some thing as such and she is mine too. But believe me, once I settle down my children will be my next of kin on any other business transaction I may be involve in... Infact every child will inherity whatever their name is assigned to as next of kin. As for my wife, she will definitly has her own name on 1 or 2 papers also. If man should commot ile aiye unexpect, everyone know what is due to him or her that way...... However, my will may covered and given explicity details about any other assets not covered by this... |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by mamafunky(f): 10:10am On Mar 18, 2015 |
My dear op, even when in a good relationship with your hubby i think it shouldn't stop you from having your own savings. But come to think of it...some men are so dumb when it comes to next of kin. Unless you guys doesn't have kids but if you do, what then stops him from using his own children as his next of kin. But men should know that whatever you kept for your wife is for your children cuz definitely a woman must care for her kids no matter how stupid and dumb she could be. So wise up our men and know that if your brother/sister is not well to do, all you kept in their care will neither get to your wife nor to your children. Be wise!! 3 Likes |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by tete7000(m): 10:11am On Mar 18, 2015 |
kendrick9: I am not a pessimist, I always maintain optimism. Thus far my optimism has attracted good things and good godly people I can trust into my life. Even if I die, I believe what will happen afterwards will remain good. My life - my past, my present and my future remain ever in God's hand. Marriage is created by God for two to become one and I see it ever like that. I can't be wiser than God! 2 Likes |
Re: Rude Awakening: I Am Not My Husband's Next Of Kin And Beneficiary!! by Nobody: 10:11am On Mar 18, 2015 |
NemzySeries:You cant put excessive wealth in the hands of a woman. That is suicide. If a man is not too rich, he can make his wife his next of kin. But the moment, you get to a certain level in life, you set up a trust to manage your estate. Your wife could own 10% to 20% stake in the companies and the companies will in turn acquire assets. But naturally, your sons are heirs to your empire and your first son is next of kin, NOT your wife. 2 Likes |
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