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My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by emperortony: 7:50am On Apr 11, 2018
Are you sure its her and not the money you really love grin

3 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by emperortony: 7:50am On Apr 11, 2018
QAre you sure its her and not the money you really love ;

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by prechbills1(m): 7:50am On Apr 11, 2018
yeyerolling:
parental blessing has no impact on the success of a marriage. Call her bluff

what do you mean by bluff?
Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by prechbills1(m): 7:51am On Apr 11, 2018
emperortony:
Are you sure its her and not the money you really love grin

I love her.
Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by fancy4eve(f): 7:58am On Apr 11, 2018
Let's get sumtin straight here, wat an elder see siting down, even if u climb d tallest tree, u will not.

my dear I go wit ur mum, we women pretend a lot, a desperado will do all it takes 2 get wat she want, after d marriage u will see her true character. Assuming d reverse is d case, u been rich nd she is not, my dear she will b humble 2 u for d rest of her lyf. Hv seen so many cases dat later end up in divorce all bcus d man does not hv a say in his house nd been use as rag. Pls tink twice b4 going into sumtin u will regret leta.

14 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by Nobody: 8:17am On Apr 11, 2018
prechbills1:


what do you mean by bluff?
go ahead with the marriage without her

1 Like

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by Nobody: 8:19am On Apr 11, 2018
fancy4eve:
Let's get sumtin straight here, wat an elder see siting down, even if u climb d tallest tree, u will not.

my dear I go wit ur mum, we women pretend a lot, a desperado will do all it takes 2 get wat she want, after d marriage u will see her true character. Assuming d reverse is d case, u been rich nd she is not, my dear she will b humble 2 u for d rest of her lyf. Hv seen so many cases dat later end up in divorce all bcus d man does not hv a say in his house nd been use as rag. Pls tink twice b4 going into sumtin u will regret leta.
this is a fallacy. Part of the reason africa is backward. Elders are not always right. My cousin was advised by family not to marry an igbo man cos of their culture. She listen bt as she no see hisband after 2 years she went back. Today the guy is a big business man whose family are well to do also and dont have time for anybody.

16 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by joe17: 8:28am On Apr 11, 2018
yeyerolling:
this is a fallacy. Part of the reason africa is backward. Elders are not always right. My cousin was advised by family not to marry an igbo man cos of their culture. She listen bt as she no see hisband after 2 years she went back. Today the guy is a big business man whose family are well to do also and dont have time for anybody.
Op sounds as tho his mind is made up, why then does he seek for advice. Hope this is not another attention seeking thread, but what do I know?

5 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by Enoma222(m): 9:21am On Apr 11, 2018
prechbills1:
My fiance and I have been dating for the past 3years. I attained 24 last week, I wanted to get married to her last year but I just wanted to wait till I attain 24.
The problem I have now is my mom. She is opposing our marriage because my fiance is 5years older than me, I'm 24 while she's 29.My dad has already endorsed the marriage, I'd have liked to go on with the marriage but I don't think going into marriage without both parents blessing is sensible that's why I need my mom's blessing and endorsement.
My fiance has good character, she's very kind and intelligent, I can't afford to lose her because of pressures from my mom at least I'm an adult.
I don't know what's happening, my mom endorsed our relationship but she doesn't endorse our marriage just because she's 5years older than me. The thing is, I can't leave this lady ,not now not ever, she have done so many things for me.
in fact she even promised to provide 80% of the things needed for the marriage!. She is rich, yes she is, the house I'm in living in now belongs to her, I moved in with her in 2016.
The truth is I love her and I can't afford to lose her because of my mom's wish. Both her parents and my dad have given us go ahead for marriage but my mom still doesn't want me to marry because of age and my fiance is beautiful.
I don't know what do now ,that's why I think I need advice from you guys,.I don't know if I should go ahead with the marriage without my mom's endorsement/blessings.

please advice


.guy follow ur heart your mum we later accept her .....as times goes on guy dont miss dis chance ooh...

2 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by castro316: 11:07am On Apr 11, 2018
prechbills1:
My fiance and I have been dating for the past 3years. I attained 24 last week, I wanted to get married to her last year but I just wanted to wait till I attain 24.
The problem I have now is my mom. She is opposing our marriage because my fiance is 5years older than me, I'm 24 while she's 29.My dad has already endorsed the marriage, I'd have liked to go on with the marriage but I don't think going into marriage without both parents blessing is sensible that's why I need my mom's blessing and endorsement.
My fiance has good character, she's very kind and intelligent, I can't afford to lose her because of pressures from my mom at least I'm an adult.
I don't know what's happening, my mom endorsed our relationship but she doesn't endorse our marriage just because she's 5years older than me. The thing is, I can't leave this lady ,not now not ever, she have done so many things for me.
in fact she even promised to provide 80% of the things needed for the marriage!. She is rich, yes she is, the house I'm in living in now belongs to her, I moved in with her in 2016.
The truth is I love her and I can't afford to lose her because of my mom's wish. Both her parents and my dad have given us go ahead for marriage but my mom still doesn't want me to marry because of age and my fiance is beautiful.
I don't know what do now ,that's why I think I need advice from you guys,.I don't know if I should go ahead with the marriage without my mom's endorsement/blessings.

please advice

My man lissten to The best advice. Marry the love of your life and keep your marriage of social media. In marriage there is no age barrier as far as you both have good plans for each other. Its better marrying more mature women because they have more to offer than dependent small girls. You have got to a new beginning of your life don't spoil it with the advice of your mum. No marriage doesn't come with hardships or individual differences. So ride on bro

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by castro316: 11:16am On Apr 11, 2018
fancy4eve:
Let's get sumtin straight here, wat an elder see siting down, even if u climb d tallest tree, u will not.

my dear I go wit ur mum, we women pretend a lot, a desperado will do all it takes 2 get wat she want, after d marriage u will see her true character. Assuming d reverse is d case, u been rich nd she is not, my dear she will b humble 2 u for d rest of her lyf. Hv seen so many cases dat later end up in divorce all bcus d man does not hv a say in his house nd been use as rag. Pls tink twice b4 going into sumtin u will regret leta.


 Young woman. Leave The man alone and let him enjoy his life. Is there any marriage that doesn't come with their shortcomings? Let them solve it themselves. He said that he has bbeen with her for more than 3 yrs so he has seen enough to conclude he will stay with her. Why spoil another woman's joy because of what you feel. This is a life decision here and this is what you can give as advice? Even you relationship you are in (that's if you are in one) is it perfect? Don't you guys quarrel once a while? Abegi

7 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by fancy4eve(f): 11:17am On Apr 11, 2018
yeyerolling:
this is a fallacy. Part of the reason africa is backward. Elders are not always right. My cousin was advised by family not to marry an igbo man cos of their culture. She listen bt as she no see hisband after 2 years she went back. Today the guy is a big business man whose family are well to do also and dont have time for anybody.
we re not talkn about culture, we re talking about ethics of lyf. Age is not d problem, assuming he is wealthy nd d lady is older dan him, it will not b an issue, but here d reverse is d case, better don't talk him into it cus his own case is different.

4 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by fancy4eve(f): 11:21am On Apr 11, 2018
quote author=castro316 post=66615235]


 Young woman. Leave The man alone and let him enjoy his life. Is there any marriage that doesn't come with their shortcomings? Let them solve it themselves. He said that he has bbeen with her for more than 3 yrs so he has seen enough to conclude he will stay with her. Why spoil another woman's joy because of what you feel. This is a life decision here and this is what you can give as advice? Even you relationship you are in (that's if you are in one) is it perfect? Don't you guys quarrel once a while? Abegi

[/quote]well am not pouring sand into his garri, just saying d fact.
He should man up nd stop lookn 4 were 2 dump his lazy Ass. Well I hate lazy guys nd I believe laziness is involve

3 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by fancy4eve(f): 11:21am On Apr 11, 2018
castro316:



 Young woman. Leave The man alone and let him enjoy his life. Is there any marriage that doesn't come with their shortcomings? Let them solve it themselves. He said that he has bbeen with her for more than 3 yrs so he has seen enough to conclude he will stay with her. Why spoil another woman's joy because of what you feel. This is a life decision here and this is what you can give as advice? Even you relationship you are in (that's if you are in one) is it perfect? Don't you guys quarrel once a while? Abegi

well am not pouring sand into his garri, just saying d fact.
He should man up nd stop lookn 4 were 2 dump his lazy Ass. Well I hate lazy guys nd I believe laziness is involve

3 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by castro316: 11:24am On Apr 11, 2018
prechbills1:
My fiance and I have been dating for the past 3years. I attained 24 last week, I wanted to get married to her last year but I just wanted to wait till I attain 24.
The problem I have now is my mom. She is opposing our marriage because my fiance is 5years older than me, I'm 24 while she's 29.My dad has already endorsed the marriage, I'd have liked to go on with the marriage but I don't think going into marriage without both parents blessing is sensible that's why I need my mom's blessing and endorsement.
My fiance has good character, she's very kind and intelligent, I can't afford to lose her because of pressures from my mom at least I'm an adult.
I don't know what's happening, my mom endorsed our relationship but she doesn't endorse our marriage just because she's 5years older than me. The thing is, I can't leave this lady ,not now not ever, she have done so many things for me.
in fact she even promised to provide 80% of the things needed for the marriage!. She is rich, yes she is, the house I'm in living in now belongs to her, I moved in with her in 2016.
The truth is I love her and I can't afford to lose her because of my mom's wish. Both her parents and my dad have given us go ahead for marriage but my mom still doesn't want me to marry because of age and my fiance is beautiful.
I don't know what do now ,that's why I think I need advice from you guys,.I don't know if I should go ahead with the marriage without my mom's endorsement/blessings.

please advice

Pls call me 08092431893
Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by castro316: 11:30am On Apr 11, 2018
fancy4eve:

well am not pouring sand into his garri, just saying d fact.
He should man up nd stop lookn 4 were 2 dump his lazy Ass. Well I hate lazy guys nd I believe laziness is involve


But there are serious matured women out there looking for a guy to say yes but guys are using Them to play football. They cry everyday because their biological clock is ticking and no reasonable man is coming their way. Not all families must a man be a bread winner. As far as they agree with each other that's fine. Rich girls after hustle and career pursuit find themselves between the devil and the dark blue sea, praying in churches for mr. Right let them sort themselves out marriage is not about good good. Its about the good the bad and the ugly

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by antidisestablis: 12:39pm On Apr 11, 2018
prechbills1:
she'd only provide 80% of the things needed for the marriage, I'd provide 20.
I don't know why you guys reason this way
Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by Enoma222(m): 12:45pm On Apr 11, 2018
fancy4eve:

well am not pouring sand into his garri, just saying d fact.
He should man up nd stop lookn 4 were 2 dump his lazy Ass. Well I hate lazy guys nd I believe laziness is involve
_bad_belle_you dat is calling some one lazy watin u don achieve at your age .... you are just be jealous for notin ....if the girl decide to spend money on the guy notin is wrong all nah love

2 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by Enoma222(m): 12:50pm On Apr 11, 2018
[quote author=antidisestablis post=66617436][/quote]my advice to you is dat ...she must respect you ...as a man. let her know abt it ...also watch out for her character if she get angry easily .....
Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by lwanga1993: 1:16pm On Apr 11, 2018
OP.. please don't listen to this castro216.... If you are my brother and have this mentality.. i will tear you better slap to know wether na juju the woman use charm you. your mentality is typical that if a woman... you are just calling yourself a man because you have a dick.. (mind you, am 24 as well)...my dear age is not the barrier here.. the main problem is her paying for the wedding and you see nothing wrong in it..WOW.. ..you even said you moved in with her(interesting)....and from the look of things ,you will gladly change your surname to hers if she asks...
incase you care to listen.. its better you borrow money from your parents to sponsor your wedding than your fiance sponsoring your wedding......... and please respect yourself and go find your own apartment.....
STOP claiming man cos you have a dick. take full control of things happening in your life.

26 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by Enoma222(m): 1:18pm On Apr 11, 2018
lwanga1993:
OP.. please don't listen to this castro216.... If you are my brother and have this mentality.. i will tear you better slap to know wether na juju the woman use charm you. your mentality is typical that if a woman... you are just calling yourself a man because you have a dick.. (mind you, am 24 as well)...my dear age is not the barrier here.. the main problem is her paying for the wedding and you see nothing wrong in it..WOW.. ..you even said you moved in with her(interesting)....and from the look of things ,you will gladly change your surname to hers if she asks...
incase you care to listen.. its better you borrow money from your parents to sponsor your wedding than your fiance sponsoring your wedding......... and please respect yourself and go find your own apartment.....
STOP claiming man cos you have a dick. take full control of things happening in your life.
_wrong_Advice

1 Like

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by Apina(m): 1:31pm On Apr 11, 2018
prechbills1:
My fiance and I have been dating for the past 3years. I attained 24 last week, I wanted to get married to her last year but I just wanted to wait till I attain 24.
The problem I have now is my mom. She is opposing our marriage because my fiance is 5years older than me, I'm 24 while she's 29.My dad has already endorsed the marriage, I'd have liked to go on with the marriage but I don't think going into marriage without both parents blessing is sensible that's why I need my mom's blessing and endorsement.
My fiance has good character, she's very kind and intelligent, I can't afford to lose her because of pressures from my mom at least I'm an adult.
I don't know what's happening, my mom endorsed our relationship but she doesn't endorse our marriage just because she's 5years older than me. The thing is, I can't leave this lady ,not now not ever, she have done so many things for me.
in fact she even promised to provide 80% of the things needed for the marriage!. She is rich, yes she is, the house I'm in living in now belongs to her, I moved in with her in 2016.
The truth is I love her and I can't afford to lose her because of my mom's wish. Both her parents and my dad have given us go ahead for marriage but my mom still doesn't want me to marry because of age and my fiance is beautiful.
I don't know what do now ,that's why I think I need advice from you guys,.I don't know if I should go ahead with the marriage without my mom's endorsement/blessings.

please advice
Your mum is most likely among the very conservative lots, I believe she would come good if you get to dispel her fears. Don't listen to all those bullshit intuitive crap, if that was the case she wouldn't have been in support of the relationship from the start, she likes ur fiancee but doesn't seem comfortable with her son marrying an older lady.
Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by Zinny25(f): 3:02pm On Apr 11, 2018
If you answer this question then I give you an advice. Which country are you from I'm sure you are not from Nigeria, in fact u r not from Africa as a whole. I'm waiting
Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by FromZeroToHero(m): 3:42pm On Apr 11, 2018
prechbills1:

she'd only provide 80% of the things needed for the marriage, I'd provide 20.

I don't know why you guys reason this way
you are the head and supposed to cater for all the marriage expenses.

3 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by Mcy56(f): 5:04pm On Apr 11, 2018
@OP, you already made your mind up to marry the lady, you just wanted support and validation.
I will say go ahead with it. The age difference should not be a barrier.
When you knew what you wanted to do in the first place, you shouldn't have mentioned anything like age difference to your parents.
It's your life and your happiness is paramount in the marriage.
For those saying otherwise, what if he quits the relationship now and couldn't get any dream lady of his choice again?
This could be so because the present one already set a standard which he would see as the minimum requirements for future one.
Mr. Man, you know yourself better than any other person.
Only be doubly sure that the love you have for her isnt connected with her affluence.
My 50cent opinion.

7 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by lawman88(m): 5:22pm On Apr 11, 2018
yeyerolling:
U had mention she is rich and u stay with her. Guy u be gold digger.
Shut up. You be gold and oil digger. Better go to school and finish your university education. I'm sorry for you because you will regret it soon
Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by Nobody: 5:59pm On Apr 11, 2018
lawman88:

Shut up. You be gold and oil digger. Better go to school and finish your university education. I'm sorry for you because you will regret it soon
what is this one saying. Are u the op??

1 Like

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by ilevic(m): 6:04pm On Apr 11, 2018
What your mum sees while she is sitting, u can't see it even if u climb a palm tree... Yoruba proverb
Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by Supreme01: 8:10pm On Apr 11, 2018
Pls my broda be very careful. If the person that shld settle ur dispot in ur home is not in agrmnt...bcareful. Age is nt d pblm but d decissn
But ask her (your mother)if she care about your joy then let her gives u r suport.
But pls be sure u r not under any pressure.You said she is goin to takecare of 80% an u 20% it a sign of pressure.
If this is your 1st time dating a gal of this class i'll advice becarefull. She is fully ready .
*But if u r 100% sure of yourself go ahead with her.

2 Likes

Re: My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Marry My Fiancee Because She's 5 Years Older Than Me by stacyadams: 8:27pm On Apr 11, 2018
fancy4eve:
Let's get sumtin straight here, wat an elder see siting down, even if u climb d tallest tree, u will not.

my dear I go wit ur mum, we women pretend a lot, a desperado will do all it takes 2 get wat she want, after d marriage u will see her true character. Assuming d reverse is d case, u been rich nd she is not, my dear she will b humble 2 u for d rest of her lyf. Hv seen so many cases dat later end up in divorce all bcus d man does not hv a say in his house nd been use as rag. Pls tink twice b4 going into sumtin u will regret leta.
my love..these days the elders with their eyeglass no dey see anytin again mbok

4 Likes

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