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Man Wey Dey Reason - Literature (25) - Nairaland

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Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by flow1759: 8:56pm On Mar 27, 2013
I put on my red T-shirt that had the picture of Tupac Amaru Shakur in front, and at the back was written: "picture me rolling".

The same T-shirt Tupac had pleaded for me to sell to him and i refused because i loved it so much.

If only i knew my love for that T-shirt would soon turn hate, i wouldn't have worn it.

Ekonunwa market lies in the heart of the capital of the "eastern heartland". One thing i liked about the market was that; it was a combined market, where you could get foodstuff, fruits, cosmetics, clothes, phones and the likes. But what i never liked about the market was that; it was too crowded, and also mad men and women could be found roaming.

We had finished the herculean task of purchasing all the things we wrote down, when, "Flow we never buy meat, wait here dey watch all dis things make i go buy meat come" Brainbox said and walked away.

Was he on a L101 mission to steal meat? He dared not, unless he wanted the butchers to cut off his hands and sold it alongside beef.

I was standing on my own "JeJely", minding my business and watching over our purchase. When from nowhere a wierd looking m'ad man came walking to my direction. As he came walking hastily towards me, i felt like running because i never liked a m'ad person coming close to me.

"how i go run leave all this things wey we buy" i tot.

He came closer and closer.

The odour that emanated from him was a combination of rotten egg and s'kunk. He came even closer, as i could hear he was muttering something.


And he hugged me.


For the 10seconds or so the hug lasted, i closed my eyes and saw myself in outer space. The market women around were laughing their f'at a'sses out, making me almost cry.

The m'ad man let go of me after saying "my brother!!". "who be ur brother? God forbid!! no be me be ur brother" i tot. He danced a funny dance and left.

I had concluded i would sell the T-shirt i wore to Tupac because the m'ad man left an indelible odour on it.

The market women continued laughing like i was some "stand up comedian" entertaining them with jokes. At that moment, i felt like walking up to them and giving them a dirty slap each.

30minutes after the "m'ad man palaver" Brainbox came saying, "no vex say i waste time oh, i buy tomatoes and them grind am for me, nahim make me waste time".

"no wahala, make we dey go house" i replied.

I just wished i could disappear from the market and appear at home.

5 Likes

Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by dayleke: 9:29pm On Mar 27, 2013
Flow,
U dey "craze" I swear....lol
"Broda from anoda moda",dis na die Flow,u go kill pesin,I swear...
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by dayleke: 9:34pm On Mar 27, 2013
HNB,
I bin good o,work things....
Can I talk with you for a sec.?# excuses himself #

HotNaijaBabe: Hey darl! How have u been!
*why are u clearing ur throat, u swallow something? Lol



Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by Josphine4good(f): 9:42pm On Mar 27, 2013
My love @ flow I have prepared your delicious meal ,come to my bed room if u are ready to eat I don't want those your lazy wife who can not cook good food for u to disturb us.
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by vision2050: 9:43pm On Mar 27, 2013
flow baba
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by sol2galay: 9:54pm On Mar 27, 2013
vision2050: flow baba


Flow there is what i don't get here,why did the Mad man chose you among all the multitude of people in the market to hug? Maybe the guy(Mr Madman is a Tu-pac fan like u)so i tot.

1 Like

Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by FoxyUltimate(m): 9:57pm On Mar 27, 2013
Haaa... Floweeeyyyy....
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by fujirice: 11:19pm On Mar 27, 2013
Oga Flowa, 1000likes to this ur last post jare!
Chei! I dn laff soteee tears full my eyez!
"my brother" lmao!
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by MsPweshy(f): 11:22pm On Mar 27, 2013
Wtf!! Wahs the meaning of this? No flirtn plzz
HotNaijaBabe: angry flowey, I just came back from work now..so tired and I had walk in the rain just to get here on time..how else do u want me to show my e-love..*sobs*..

# can u give me a e-kiss and e-hug pls! I'm so cold!
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by MsPweshy(f): 11:22pm On Mar 27, 2013
HotNaijaBabe: angry flowey, I just came back from work now..so tired and I had walk in the rain just to get here on time..how else do u want me to show my e-love..*sobs*..

# can u give me a e-kiss and e-hug pls! I'm so cold!
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by valboy20(m): 12:33am On Mar 28, 2013
Flow...dx ya galx go eat u raw sumdae
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by IZUKWU(m): 4:09am On Mar 28, 2013
'My brother' how are you today
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by Nobody: 6:44am On Mar 28, 2013
I shout in Igala MAD MAN DON HUG FLOW O.
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by Gepheral: 7:44am On Mar 28, 2013
Hehehehehe......
Hilarious thread.. Good job bro.. cheesy
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by bumzel89(f): 9:24am On Mar 28, 2013
Nice one flow. I registered jes to say, "thumbs up bro". Kip it up.
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by 4kizo(m): 9:42am On Mar 28, 2013
Kwakwakwakwakwakwa, my broda indeed
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by flow1759: 1:32pm On Mar 28, 2013
bumzel89: Nice one flow. I registered jes to say, "thumbs up bro". Kip it up.

thanks, more laugh ahead, keep ur fingers crossed. Make una no vex say i never update since, i busy.

1 Like

Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by Fishoy(f): 4:43pm On Mar 28, 2013
Josphine4good: My love @ flow I have prepared your delicious meal ,come to my bed room if u are ready to eat I don't want those your lazy wife who can not cook good food for u to disturb us.


after d mad mans hug u stil wnt him in ur bed witout a lon hot shower
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by vision2050: 5:13pm On Mar 28, 2013
i hail flow
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by alfablondy: 6:11pm On Mar 28, 2013
Oga flow if na mad woman hug you, how you go feel?
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by dayleke: 6:33pm On Mar 28, 2013
"Wait until the mad woman hugs Flow and see what happens" in Man's voice



alfablondy: Oga flow if na mad woman hug you, how you go feel?
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by vision2050: 9:59pm On Mar 28, 2013
vision2050: i hail flow
sleepless night because of flow. Your email make i send you small recharge card(easter gift).
Walk and neva stumble
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by flow1759: 10:01pm On Mar 28, 2013
As we got to the gate of our compound, i saw Tupac, "Tupac, i wan finally sell this T-shirt for you oh, how much u go buy am?" i said, "ehn, ehn, i go buy am 1k" he replied. "but i tell u say na 3k i buy am na, u wan com buy am 1k" i said "ehn ehn ok bring the 1k" i said removing the T-shirt instantly.

"Flow!! This one wey u no wear shirt, any wahala?" Snoop asked as we entered the room. "no wahala oh, heat dey catch me" i told a lie.

"hello!! Flow" A female voice greeted me, i turned and saw Lydia, Lydia the t'omboy. "hi!!" i responded to her greeting. She was so "skinny" that i never noticed her presence initially. "this one wey dis Tega babe dey greet me like dis ehn? For everybody wey dey dis room, na me she see to greet, make the greeting no mean another thing oh" i tot.


"Lydia will cook Egusi soup for us" Pkc said after few minutes, "no problem" Lydia replied, "and if u need assistance, Flow will always be handy" Pkc told Lydia. "but why me na?" i tot. Since Pkc brought me to that house, his wish was my command.

I and Lydia was in the kitchen.

She was doing the actual cooking while i was helping out with some chores like; slicing the vegetable, and choping the onion.

If i must say, Lydia was a good cook, because she cooked with so much dexterity.

From time to time, she stared at me giving me a bright smile. I smiled back anyways.

I never knew her smile would result to us not eating the Egusi soup she was cooking. Egusi soup that had already created a cloud of Aroma in the room and beyond.

The soup was still cooking, it was almost done. So i was pouring water into the big pot we used to boil water for Eba.

I bent down pouring the water with my a'ss facing Lydia, i couldn't tell what attracted her to my a'ss.

She came close and f'ondled my a'ss.

Mehn!! She scared the living daylight off me. I tot a rat was walking on my a'ss.

I jumped up dancing "Micheal Jackson break dance", and mistakenly my right leg landed into the hot soup.

Not only that, the pot of soup poured on the floor.


Not only that, Brainbox came from nowhere, he picked up almost all the pieces of meat and ran.

I cried bitterly, not because Brainbox took all the meat, but because my right leg was in pain.

3 Likes

Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by harmless011: 11:04pm On Mar 28, 2013
hahahhahhhahahahahahahahahahhahahah
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by johnwizey: 11:05pm On Mar 28, 2013
FLOW FLOWER FLOWEST......I HAIL O
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by Fishoy(f): 11:28pm On Mar 28, 2013
Been readin on alow key since bt i cnt hlp typin dis time....kai u too much jare
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by flow1759: 12:29am On Mar 29, 2013
Fishoy: Been readin on alow key since bt i cnt hlp typin dis time....kai u too much jare

thanks a million.
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by flow1759: 12:40am On Mar 29, 2013
vision2050: sleepless night because of flow. Your email make i send you small recharge card(easter gift).
Walk and neva stumble

aaaaaah!! Am short of words. See person dey get sleepless night because of me oh. I don become superstar oh. Or so i tot.

1 Like

Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by Osgee(m): 12:50am On Mar 29, 2013
Oga flow, i see u. I nid mooooorrrrreeeeee
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by omoadeleye(m): 2:15am On Mar 29, 2013
flow1759: As we got to the gate of our compound, i saw Tupac, "Tupac, i wan finally sell this T-shirt for you oh, how much u go buy am?" i said, "ehn, ehn, i go buy am 1k" he replied. "but i tell u say na 3k i buy am na, u wan com buy am 1k" i said "ehn ehn ok bring the 1k" i said removing the T-shirt instantly.

"Flow!! This one wey u no wear shirt, any wahala?" Snoop asked as we entered the room. "no wahala oh, heat dey catch me" i told a lie.

"hello!! Flow" A female voice greeted me, i turned and saw Lydia, Lydia the t'omboy. "hi!!" i responded to her greeting. She was so "skinny" that i never noticed her presence initially. "this one wey dis Tega babe dey greet me like dis ehn? For everybody wey dey dis room, na me she see to greet, make the greeting no mean another thing oh" i tot.


"Lydia will cook Egusi soup for us" Pkc said after few minutes, "no problem" Lydia replied, "and if u need assistance, Flow will always be handy" Pkc told Lydia. "but why me na?" i tot. Since Pkc brought me to that house, his wish was my command.

I and Lydia was in the kitchen.

She was doing the actual cooking while i was helping out with some chores like; slicing the vegetable, and choping the onion.

If i must say, Lydia was a good cook, because she cooked with so much dexterity.

From time to time, she stared at me giving me a bright smile. I smiled back anyways.

I never knew her smile would result to us not eating the Egusi soup she was cooking. Egusi soup that had already created a cloud of Aroma in the room and beyond.

The soup was still cooking, it was almost done. So i was pouring water into the big pot we used to boil water for Eba.

I bent down pouring the water with my a'ss facing Lydia, i couldn't tell what attracted her to my a'ss.

She came close and f'ondled my a'ss.

Mehn!! She scared the living daylight off me. I tot a rat was walking on my a'ss.

I jumped up dancing "Micheal Jackson break dance", and mistakenly my right leg landed into the hot soup.

Not only that, the pot of soup poured on the floor.


Not only that, Brainbox came from nowhere, he picked up almost all the pieces of meat and ran.

I cried bitterly, not because Brainbox took all the meat, but because my right leg was in pain.
oga flow you see now that you dan waste the soup... Walai the soup dey pain me make i no lie.
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by 4kizo(m): 5:31am On Mar 29, 2013
Flow i v cracked al my rib
Re: Man Wey Dey Reason by Ezeebube2(m): 6:22am On Mar 29, 2013
Baba Flow, its true that ur story is a joy to read, but me i no go comment again because u always ignore my compliments. If i try am again, mk i n.aked baff 4 my bathroom. grin

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