MRbrownJAY: @OP
- do you think that what you did is "now" something RIGHT to do, simply because you made that mistake?
- are you saying that being attracted to another man is ALL what it takes to justify cheating on your partner?
- have you confessed to your partner that you cheated on him, the person that gave you trust etc?!
- how exactly do you intend to RIGHT the WRONG you did, and help future people that may be in your predicament?
- if you now believe that it is ok to cheat (for whatever flimsy reason) then the only reason you didnt do that before was NOT because you were a GOOD partner, but simply because you had not met the proper person to cheat on your partner with.

Enegod: reasons why you cheated on your bf with a married man;
1.your bf couldn't satisfy you financially and you now turn to runz gal...you were attracted to his wealth or
2. your bf couldn't satisfy you sexually,maybe his tyn is like his last finger...and you startd looking for married men coz you were told they have experience..
op may God forgive you

Aleovera: Actually, I have met a lot of men I find attractive but the thought of cheating never crossed my mind and if it ever did, I always applied reasoning. I can't begin to have a warped mindset because of a mistake, I can't accept that cheating is okay, but that it can open if one is not careful. I am trying to right this wrong by ending this truly. I haven't been able to confide in anyone that's why I came to this forum.

Aleovera:

Actually God already has! I just need to make sure to forgive myself and move on. As for the reasons you think the incident occurred, that's just silly.

Aleovera: Okay, does doing the right thing mean that I have to let my boyfriend know what went down? I mean really, how will that help? I am not trying to eat and have any cake, just wondering how that is supposed to help.

MRbrownJAY:

what made this man "ok" to cheat with and not the others? thinking the way you do, then i can safely say that (in your opinion) everything is right in this world, as soon as you do it (even though it makes no sense or aint RIGHT). the sad fact about your actions is that you didnt have to cheat, you could have broken up with your BF and then go be with that other guy, BUT you instead decided to do it WRONGLY by cheating, and now you have the audacity to come here and say that we shouldnt judge or say never. you are focusing on what you did, instead of asking yourself the important question, which is:"were your actions RIGHT or WRONG?" and "could you have done it RIGHT?"

cheating can only happen if people are thinking with their coochies and dikcs instead of using their brains.the reason you cheated is purely in your mind, as you could have done this RIGHT, but you were weak, selfish and definitely greedy at that moment and decided to cheat instead.

Aleovera: Okay, does doing the right thing mean that I have to let my boyfriend know what went down? I mean really, how will that help? I am not trying to eat and have any cake, just wondering how that is supposed to help.

MRbrownJAY:

doing the right thing means you SHOULD have thought about this BEFORE doing something wrong. it was very easy to fix, but you chose the wrong path. what you wrote is as crazy as saying that murder is not wrong and possibly "ok", simply because a murderer regrets killing someone, highly laughable!!!

you need to come correct with your bf so he doesnt feel that he has done anything wrong. you may not have to tell him the gross deceitful act that you did, but at least he has to know that you are the ONLY one to be blamed here.

btw, you have already eaten and had your cake too the minute you cheated, thats what cheating is all about.

Aleovera: Hmmm, Yes I was weak and selfish. Stop assuming I think my actions were okay. I wonder why that seems to be the popular opinion. Did I somehow express that?

Aleovera:
No use pointing out what I should or shouldn't have done seeing that it is a lil too late for that. Now, as regards coming clean, are you saying I don't have to tell him about my moment of weakness?

Aleovera:

Hmmm, Yes I was weak and selfish. Stop assuming I think my actions were okay. I wonder why that seems to be the popular opinion. Did I somehow express that?

trappatoni: there are two masters in the world-the spirit and the self. in the begining it was only the spirit,the self came into being when adam and eve ate the forbidden fruit-when they ate the forbidden fruit they fell into soul sleep and saw their unclothedness but its just an illusion its not real,everything that comes from the self is not real and will perish.everything that comes from the spirit will endure forever.DO NOT JUSTIFY YOURSELF ,RETURN TO YOUR SPIRITUAL ORIGIN BEFORE ITS TOO LATE.

Aleovera:
Hello house,

I have been a consistent guest on this forum and decided to hop on to the next level by becoming a member.. yayy

Okay so, as regards the subject, let me start by giving a brief description of myself or the sort of person I used to be. I used to think of myself as really disciplined, principled and one who would never compromise her values or standards. Also, I used to be so quick to pass judgement. I never could understand why girls dated married men and deluded themselves into thinking they were in love! Not only did I find such circumstances disgustingly annoying but also judged the ladies as silly, stupid, gullible, irresponsible, thoughtless, selfish and cruel!

I also had zero tolerance for people who cheat on their partners. I saw them as discontented and highly undisciplined individuals.

However, I have had reason to change my perspectives as a result of some recent happenings in my life!

I cheated on my partner with a married man! I am totally shocked at myself! The crazy part of this is that I think I fell in love with this married man! My boo and I are tight and have been together for well over 4years and I always thought I could never be attracted to any other man. I have tried to put an end to this craziness because it just ain't worth it but its so hard.

The purpose of this thread is to:
1) Let you all who think so highly of yourself to be careful lest you fall. Never say never! Never think you are too disciplined or smart or principled to fall for certain temptations. Those who know me will never believe me if I tell them I fell for adultery (I can't even believe myself)

2)Seek counsel from people who have gone through this kind of stuff. You had an affair you knew you had to get out of but just couldn't, how did you deal with it.

What I have been doing lately is praying and deliberately not contacting this married dude. (I still find myself thinking about him)I also told my boo I needed a break!

Please let's discuss maturely as I believe there are so many people going through this kinda stuff but cant share with anyone because of the fear of condemnation and peoples hypocritical and self righteous attitude!

WackyJ1:
Look at you.. I knew it, you were seriously considering not telling him. So if you end the relationship, you'll just give a filmsy excuse and say that's why? Did you even read my post on the previous page ? Do you think he'll just let you go like that? Does 4 years not mean anything to you? Where you ever who you Said you were?
And when you're asking bout help? You should have put it well. How will telling him help ME ?because that is really what you want to know, doing the right thing will help him so forget about yourself for now.
Jeez, and you'll come here and be talking don't judge me...

Mynd_44:
Simple. Greed and selfishness.

And oh before we forget, the man too has some blame in this. It am blaming the OP not cos she cheated with a married man but because she cheated.

The fault of a married man cheating is on the man himself. The OP has no business with the wife as she did not swear in front of God and man to her, he did

Aleovera:

Of course not! That would be mighty silly of me. Actually, this situation has made me more open minded, realizing how careful I should be about taking things for granted. Before now, I didn't have issues relating with men, married or not because I thought certain boundaries can NEVER be crossed! But with this situation, I thread veeeeery carefully knowing temptations happen and the seemingly untouchable can fall carelessly.

Aleovera:
Hello house,

I have been a consistent guest on this forum and decided to hop on to the next level by becoming a member.. yayy

Okay so, as regards the subject, let me start by giving a brief description of myself or the sort of person I used to be. I used to think of myself as really disciplined, principled and one who would never compromise her values or standards. Also, I used to be so quick to pass judgement. I never could understand why girls dated married men and deluded themselves into thinking they were in love! Not only did I find such circumstances disgustingly annoying but also judged the ladies as silly, stupid, gullible, irresponsible, thoughtless, selfish and cruel!

I also had zero tolerance for people who cheat on their partners. I saw them as discontented and highly undisciplined individuals.

However, I have had reason to change my perspectives as a result of some recent happenings in my life!

I cheated on my partner with a married man! I am totally shocked at myself! The crazy part of this is that I think I fell in love with this married man! My boo and I are tight and have been together for well over 4years and I always thought I could never be attracted to any other man. I have tried to put an end to this craziness because it just ain't worth it but its so hard.

The purpose of this thread is to:
1) Let you all who think so highly of yourself to be careful lest you fall. Never say never! Never think you are too disciplined or smart or principled to fall for certain temptations. Those who know me will never believe me if I tell them I fell for adultery (I can't even believe myself)

2)Seek counsel from people who have gone through this kind of stuff. You had an affair you knew you had to get out of but just couldn't, how did you deal with it.

What I have been doing lately is praying and deliberately not contacting this married dude. (I still find myself thinking about him)I also told my boo I needed a break!

Please let's discuss maturely as I believe there are so many people going through this kinda stuff but cant share with anyone because of the fear of condemnation and peoples hypocritical and self righteous attitude!

ogugua88: [size=13pt]I will NEVER sleep with a married man who isn't my husband.[/size]

ogugua88: [size=13pt]I will NEVER sleep with a married man who isn't my husband.[/size]