dre11: Cest moi and luzdear
i cee yah

cest that a lovely pix of yah
you look take away

Thanks dear.Going to church now to praise my God and shake my bums.Had a change of mind.

tunbebes:

Its up Rein

That's not you

ochon: Hello peasants and peasantesses, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, fellaz and wivez, it's been a wonderful year, filled with mild fights, subtle jabs, hook-ups and breakups, all kinds of zoning, heartbreaks, friendships e.t.c. It's been one helluva ride. So to appreciate y'all, especially King Ochon for protecting the safety of this nook, we at the RELATIONSHIPS SEXPERTS FIRM [/b]will like to announce that we'll be giving a whooping 90% discount to any threadmate that patronizes us.
I know all of y'all might be wondering what we do at [b]RELATIONSHIPS SEXPERTS FIRM(RSF), wondering "what the fúck is RSF?". Well, in RSF, we basically build relationship from the scratch. We mend broken relationship. Even when there's no sign of relationship or no hope of any, our highly recommended, quality, top notch "sexperts" have the supersonic abilities and brains to generate one. Even those that wants to be FWKB(friends with kissing benefits(reinc and SOM) ), FWB(friends with benefits), or wanna improve their "bedmatics" skills, will all be catered for in our firm/institute.. We boast of a 98% successful relationship mended rate(SRMR). Whereas other firms can't you give 30% SRMR. We've been able to hook up jay-z and beyonce, jekyll and ella, tabh and LIPsy, SOM and spade, GEJ and PEJ, obama and michelle, rooney and his wife, coleen and a host of other countless celebrity relationships and dating and marriage.
With us, you don't have to fear the virus of FRIENDZONING. We've sexperts, headed by two of our very best, King Ochon and King Reinc. Many years of getting ochonged, friendzoned, brotherzoned, siggy zoned(reinc ), no-hope-zoned,betrayedzoned both offline and online, have toughened this two Kings up and gave them an indepth knowledge of the disease called REINjection and also how make relationships successful. IyawoTm is also one of our client . Now in the spirit of xmas, we'll give out one lecture for the NO-HOPE-ZONED amongst us like dre11, GOM and dannyxy. Lwkmd. Buwhahahahahaha . To show 'em how to make a girl love you. How to make a SUPERFLAKIE(shy lady), become a LMTM(open up and chat with you)
Now, we've a case study, one of your very own, the EARBROW peasant called Njokusboy. . You see, since this guy's life, he's never crushed before. He flirted and chased gurls up and down like a he-goat on heat, (lwkmd) he never knew what fallen in love with an online character was like. He disbelieved in such theory. To him, it was non-existent, vague. All these changed when a surreal power of love/crush hit our loyal kwasia peasant called nokusboy . He fell for Lertee but the problem is that, this useless peasant didn't how to woo her, to avoid her ochonging him and also after boasting of "I don't crush" . So he came to us, reinc and King Ochon, for help. And like the caring Kings we're, we decided to help his sorry behind.
So we monitored lertee, her behavourial pattern, the she posts and most especially, her likes. Now listen up "NO HOPES"(dre11, GOM, dannyxy and co) , the best way to get into you crush's heart is to know what she likes. Her likes and dislikes, from there, you can have a better chance of breaking her barriers. . E.g, when toyintomato came to meet us, we told him, SOM a.k.a Miss Ogbuefi hates uptight guys, but he didn't listen, instead he was chasing reinc. Lwkmd. Before he could know what is happening, "the has long sailed", meaning SOM had become addicted to psychedelia and my nigga weeped . So armed with our lesson, njokusboy, made the first and BOLD move. Emphasis on "bold". You see, ladies love confident guys, guys that ain't scared to protect them and showcase 'em to the world. That's why lekpalicious chose reinc before ochonging him. Lwkmd . Reinc no vex, but I have to say the truth. . So as I was yarning, njoku made the BOLD move below ↓↓↓↓
The words were so on point that toyintomato began tripping for him. . Lmao
When he made that move, he was doubting the potency of our skills and he wrote
So like a sexpert I am, I told him
but the useless peasant lost hope when lertee replied his epistle with. Just "awwww" and then he complained to lertee, asking if only "awww" is what she can say. Telling her "so you ochonged me". Lwkmd. And attacked me saying
But as an experienced sexpert, I retorted, encouraging him that we never fail to deliver with the below
He then mailed us offline, ranting and raving but King reinc would have none of it and told him
Reinc: sharap there this bloddy peasant. All these peasant around me, I'm a you king.
Ochon: kwasia reinc mumu, advice him jor, you are here shouting peasant this, peasant that.
mtcheeewwww.
Reinc: earbrow, you have to trust us. Our services are well known, it never fails.
So the peasant was now full of confidence and wrote below
Lwkmd. Buwahahahah
So I chipped as with my expertise
And like all ladies that love confident guys, lertee fell dangerously in love with him and confessed and even blew the peasant a kiss
The earbrow lord nearly fall my hand by hyperventilating cos of a kiss, but I forgave him cos I know how love dazes us all
But I had to caution him and tell to be on his toes before he slips up
Now, you see, the problem with all these NO-hope zoned like dre11 is that they ain't versatile. That's why superflakie got tired of "do you have a thing" ish dre11 was usuing to break her shell. Lwkmd. so being an expert in this, I told switch to another hobby of lertee, which is her love for novels. In case you didn't know. Njokusboy have never read all those novels that he was saying. We told him to lie, just to make lertee fall for him. He was like "but she won't forgive me if she finds out" and reinc told him
Reinc: mtcheeeeewww . Useless peasant. Shin shin, you don't know. You don't know shingbain. . Haven't you heard of "if you have never lied to your woman, you don't love her"?.
Ochon: I tire for this earbrow. Don't question us goddamit!!. Do as we commanded, this earbrow peasant .
So the peasant switched to novels and lertee fell for it,, see below
At point, when njoku was breaking her shell, she became shy. Awwww... Now fellaz, when a lady is shy to look you in the eye, it means she's almost fallen, a lil "push" and she's all yours and also give her confidence too like we told Mr earbrow
Awwww. Love nwantiti. *sniffs*.
Now the NO-HOPE zoned, always remember that the LIPsy's will always try to discourage you. The LIPsy's are those that are tripping for a gurl you want but lack the confidence to talk to her, like KsliP . See below
LWKMD. Papa ostrich too wicked
But njoku did fear, cos he's gotten lertee where he wanted her, so he kept up the novel chat even though he has read none of them. Lwkmd
Now as I lectured you guys earlier, don't dwell on one subject, know what the lady wants and use it to break her shell. So when njoku ran outta ideas, he consulted me and reinc and we told "she loves Man Utd", attack her from there, she go go gberekete" and the peasant attacked sharparly. See below
And then King ochon stepped to bless the union and cement the legacy of NJOTEE
So you see, all those OCHONGED and REINJECTEEs, don't fret, patronize KING OCHON AND KING REINC and y'all lives will never remain the same
Mail us @ KingOhcon@peasantreinc.com.
Happy new year in advance E-Fam

That red part got me lmsao...jeeezzzz

ochon: Hello peasants and peasantesses, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, fellaz and wivez, it's been a wonderful year, filled with mild fights, subtle jabs, hook-ups and breakups, all kinds of zoning, heartbreaks, friendships e.t.c. It's been one helluva ride. So to appreciate y'all, especially King Ochon for protecting the safety of this nook, we at the RELATIONSHIPS SEXPERTS FIRM [/b]will like to announce that we'll be giving a whooping 90% discount to any threadmate that patronizes us.

I know all of y'all might be wondering what we do at [b]RELATIONSHIPS SEXPERTS FIRM(RSF), wondering "what the fúck is RSF?". Well, in RSF, we basically build relationship from the scratch. We mend broken relationship. Even when there's no sign of relationship or no hope of any, our highly recommended, quality, top notch "sexperts" have the supersonic abilities and brains to generate one. Even those that wants to be FWKB(friends with kissing benefits(reinc and SOM) ), FWB(friends with benefits), or wanna improve their "bedmatics" skills, will all be catered for in our firm/institute.. We boast of a 98% successful relationship mended rate(SRMR). Whereas other firms can't you give 30% SRMR. We've been able to hook up jay-z and beyonce, jekyll and ella, tabh and LIPsy, SOM and spade, GEJ and PEJ, obama and michelle, rooney and his wife, coleen and a host of other countless celebrity relationships and dating and marriage.


With us, you don't have to fear the virus of FRIENDZONING. We've sexperts, headed by two of our very best, King Ochon and King Reinc. Many years of getting ochonged, friendzoned, brotherzoned, siggy zoned(reinc ), no-hope-zoned,betrayedzoned both offline and online, have toughened this two Kings up and gave them an indepth knowledge of the disease called REINjection and also how make relationships successful. IyawoTm is also one of our client . Now in the spirit of xmas, we'll give out one lecture for the NO-HOPE-ZONED amongst us like dre11, GOM and dannyxy. Lwkmd. Buwhahahahahaha . To show 'em how to make a girl love you. How to make a SUPERFLAKIE(shy lady), become a LMTM(open up and chat with you)

Now, we've a case study, one of your very own, the EARBROW peasant called Njokusboy. . You see, since this guy's life, he's never crushed before. He flirted and chased gurls up and down like a he-goat on heat, (lwkmd) he never knew what fallen in love with an online character was like. He disbelieved in such theory. To him, it was non-existent, vague. All these changed when a surreal power of love/crush hit our loyal kwasia peasant called nokusboy . He fell for Lertee but the problem is that, this useless peasant didn't how to woo her, to avoid her ochonging him and also after boasting of "I don't crush" . So he came to us, reinc and King Ochon, for help. And like the caring Kings we're, we decided to help his sorry behind.

So we monitored lertee, her behavourial pattern, the she posts and most especially, her likes. Now listen up "NO HOPES"(dre11, GOM, dannyxy and co) , the best way to get into you crush's heart is to know what she likes. Her likes and dislikes, from there, you can have a better chance of breaking her barriers. . E.g, when toyintomato came to meet us, we told him, SOM a.k.a Miss Ogbuefi hates uptight guys, but he didn't listen, instead he was chasing reinc. Lwkmd. Before he could know what is happening, "the has long sailed", meaning SOM had become addicted to psychedelia and my nigga weeped . So armed with our lesson, njokusboy, made the first and BOLD move. Emphasis on "bold". You see, ladies love confident guys, guys that ain't scared to protect them and showcase 'em to the world. That's why lekpalicious chose reinc before ochonging him. Lwkmd . Reinc no vex, but I have to say the truth. . So as I was yarning, njoku made the BOLD move below ↓↓↓↓

The words were so on point that toyintomato began tripping for him. . Lmao



When he made that move, he was doubting the potency of our skills and he wrote


So like a sexpert I am, I told him


but the useless peasant lost hope when lertee replied his epistle with. Just "awwww" and then he complained to lertee, asking if only "awww" is what she can say. Telling her "so you ochonged me". Lwkmd. And attacked me saying

But as an experienced sexpert, I retorted, encouraging him that we never fail to deliver with the below


He then mailed us offline, ranting and raving but King reinc would have none of it and told him

Reinc: sharap there this bloddy peasant. All these peasant around me, I'm a you king.

Ochon: kwasia reinc mumu, advice him jor, you are here shouting peasant this, peasant that.
mtcheeewwww.

Reinc: earbrow, you have to trust us. Our services are well known, it never fails.

So the peasant was now full of confidence and wrote below

Lwkmd. Buwahahahah

So I chipped as with my expertise


And like all ladies that love confident guys, lertee fell dangerously in love with him and confessed and even blew the peasant a kiss


The earbrow lord nearly fall my hand by hyperventilating cos of a kiss, but I forgave him cos I know how love dazes us all


But I had to caution him and tell to be on his toes before he slips up


Now, you see, the problem with all these NO-hope zoned like dre11 is that they ain't versatile. That's why superflakie got tired of "do you have a thing" ish dre11 was usuing to break her shell. Lwkmd. So being an expert in this, I told switch to another hobby of lertee, which is her love for novels. In case you didn't know. Njokusboy have never read all those novels that he was saying. We told him to lie, just to make lertee fall for him. He was like "but she won't forgive me if she finds out" and reinc told him

Reinc: mtcheeeeewww . Useless peasant. Shin shin, you don't know. You don't know shingbain. . Haven't you heard of "if you have never lied to your woman, you don't love her"?.

Ochon: I tire for this earbrow. Don't question us goddamit!!. Do as we commanded, this earbrow peasant .

So the peasant switched to novels and lertee fell for it,, see below




At point, when njoku was breaking her shell, she became shy. Awwww... Now fellaz, when a lady is shy to look you in the eye, it means she's almost fallen, a lil "push" and she's all yours and also give her confidence too like we told Mr earbrow



Awwww. Love nwantiti. *sniffs*.
Now the NO-HOPE zoned, always remember that the LIPsy's will always try to discourage you. The LIPsy's are those that are tripping for a gurl you want but lack the confidence to talk to her, like KsliP . See below

LWKMD. Papa ostrich too wicked

But njoku did fear, cos he's gotten lertee where he wanted her, so he kept up the novel chat even though he has read none of them. Lwkmd


Now as I lectured you guys earlier, don't dwell on one subject, know what the lady wants and use it to break her shell. So when njoku ran outta ideas, he consulted me and reinc and we told "she loves Man Utd", attack her from there, she go go gberekete" and the peasant attacked sharparly. See below




And then King ochon stepped to bless the union and cement the legacy of NJOTEE


So you see, all those OCHONGED and REINJECTEEs, don't fret, patronize KING OCHON AND KING REINC and y'all lives will never remain the same



Mail us @ KingOhcon@peasantreinc.com.



Happy new year in advance E-Fam

*****

I don't even know which parts to highlight..almost all the lines got me laughing out loud.. As in I wan pee for pant.. ..

My bro vex leave my room..he couldn't stand my uncontrollable laughter..

Okon, your a a big case ehn..so hilarious..

Btw, No cross over at church today

lmtm:
Christmas was fun anyways,not like there's anything specifically that makes it fun but the village serene and the dramas around..some suitors come displaying power or cash and so many things .

Hmm. That's good to hear. So suitors are coming already?. Why won't they, they can't resist you

tunbebes: sup peepz? bin following dis thread since day1 as a guest. ochon and rein...love ya loadz. u make ma day alwayz. dre and his boo abgift.,som and her boo spade,dannyxy,njokusboi and lertee his boo...tanx u all > gracias.

Awww.. Thanks tunbebes... Welcome to our lovely E-family

I didn't see your pic BTW, re-upload

lertee:
That red part got me lmsao...jeeezzzz

LMAO .. Your boo will keel me this night

dommfa: I don't even know which parts to highlight..almost all the lines got me laughing out loud.. As in I wan pee for pant.. ..

My bro vex leave my room..he couldn't stand my uncontrollable laughter..

Okon, your a a big case ehn..so hilarious..

Btw, No cross over at church today

LMAO... I thought the "recap" will be boring, but I gave it a try. Lwkmd. Glad that you loved it

LMAO.. I need deliverance.

Crossover fire!!. I dey my house dey dance o jare. Make them cross the over for me

Kslib:
*****

How you dey LIPsy

ochon:

LMAO... I thought the "recap" will be boring, but I gave it a try. Lwkmd. Glad that you loved it

LMAO.. I need deliverance.

Crossover fire!!. I dey my house dey dance o jare. Make them cross the over for me

Pics\video or it isn't happening..

"Look back in forgiveness, forward in hope, down in
compassion and up with Gratitude."- Zig Ziglar.

Have a glorious cross over night peeps!

dommfa:

Pics\video or it isn't happening..

LWKMD.. See Mrs ogbuefi, lwkmd.. Have you joined the "pic or it didn't happen" crew?.

Well, remember the good news I told you about earlier?. That made me look forward to the new year, well it's that "news". And seriously, except when I'm at villa, I don't do that cross over night stuff. Aint nobody got that time

ochon:

How you dey LIPsy

Lol.. I just dey like dele..

That epistle was hilarious.. Lmao!! I just wan wicked you with that meme.. Lol

ochon:

LMAO .. Your boo will keel me this night

Lmao,you deserve a slap seriously.
Okon like you

ochon:
LWKMD.. See Mrs ogbuefi, lwkmd.. Have you joined the "pic or it didn't happen" crew?.
Well, remember the good news I told you about earlier?. That made me look forward to the new year, well it's that "news". And seriously, except when I'm at villa, I don't do that cross over night stuff. Aint nobody got that time

Lol@ aint nobody got that time, omo esu .. I even wanted to ask you about the news the other time, but went to breast-feed my niece ..

What's the good news about? Any Clue? or you don't wanna share, or should i just chill and expect a novel on it as usual?

dommfa:

Lol@ aint nobody got that time, omo esu .. I even wanted to ask you about the news the other time, but went to breast-feed my niece ..

What's the good news about? Any Clue? or you don't wanna share, or should i just chill and expect a novel on it as usual?

LMAO@omo esu. Abeg translate. Buwhahahah@"should I just chill and expect a novel on it as usual?". Lwkmd. Doomfa, you dey tackle me well these days. You and LIpsy . Chai, I don suffer. Do I really write that long?.

Well, I'll be updating it soon, I just a pictorial evidence from my brother and bam!!. It'll updated on my diary

ochon:

Awww.. Thanks tunbebes... Welcome to our lovely E-family

I didn't see your pic BTW, re-upload

. Uwc Ochon. its up now...upload urs too.

lertee:
Lmao,you deserve a slap seriously.
Okon like you

LMAO... Your boo understands, after all I engineered NJOTEE

How was your day dearie?

Kslib:
Lol.. I just dey like dele..

That epistle was hilarious.. Lmao!! I just wan wicked you with that meme.. Lol

LMAO... That meme tire me I swear. . I though the epistle was dry, na wa o, I didn't know I tired . I was LMAO while writing it

Nice pics tunbebes. Me likey

Black is indeed beaurifulllllll . Keep on rocking mamma mia

lertee:
That's not you

.
Its up

tunbebes: .
Its up

Ok seen babe,pretty you

Ok!! Lemme lead the way!!

Vn in hausa below!!!

ochon: Nice pics tunbebes. Me likey

Black is indeed beaurifulllllll . Keep on rocking mamma mia

tanx Ochon. Lemme see urs too nah.

ochon:

LMAO... Your boo understands, after all I engineered NJOTEE

How was your day dearie?

Not only engineer na architect..

My day was fine,i got back to my base this evening . How did your day go?

ochon:

LMAO... That meme tire me I swear. . I though the epistle was dry, na wa o, I didn't know I tired . I was LMAO while writing it

Are you kidding? It was nice..

You try wella, save for the part where you attacked me, your god!! .. Anyway, I forgive your flat, glass-table shaped head sha..

dre11:
Reinc oh Reinc
i go roooovvvveeeeeeeee ooooooo

i've been drooling. She's just beauty at its peak

tunbebes:

Its up Rein

I just saw it. Nice picture. And welllllllllcccooooooooommmmmmmmeeeeeeeee

tunbebes: Reinc...Going! Going!! Going!!! Gone!!!!

I wasn't even online lol but I saw when u just reuploaded for ochon

Old roger?

How far?

dre11:
good luck on your chase

atleast the chase ended in August and if you are about to start your own .......... then thats good

nobody is holding you back
just inform me when you get the prize ooooo

Most definitely