Well, i have nothing against african Americans,

but the question is: do our girls find it comfortable marrying an african american? i know the boys normally do.
Am asking this question based on my own experience. My sisters, when we first cames here, they couldn't imagin datin naija guys, but what i notice is that when time went by, they broke up with their african america guys they were going out with, they're all now dating nigerians, one of them is already married. They all had good african american boyfriends. Not only my sisters but many african girls to, they rather marry whites than Negroes. i mean even if the negroes were nice to them. ive seen it several times. even my African american friend told me the same thing. he also admitted that he doesn't blame them.

please leave your opinion and tell me why. i have heard some many reasons but don't want to reach to a conclusion till i get some feed backs from nairalanders!!!

I have no problem marrying any guy as long as he treats me like i want to be treated, which is like a queen by the way. but in the end its up to me, i would marry a naija guy because we have something huge in common, we understand ourselves when it comes to the values of marriage, and respect, which most african american or white guys don't. i would want to marry someone that understands my culture and the entire traditional wedding issue, and how important it is to me. but don't get me wrong i will go for a white or african american guy anytime time of the day if he meets my qualifications, which means being educated, and having alot of potential and wants to get to know more about my culture.

But in the end i would go for my naija guy because they value marriage more that other guys i've met or known.

hi am new to this site i wanna make friends and know the rudiment of the site and i've got questions about youth service

U know, this should be trasjed out outrightly cos if marrages amongs various ethnics groups do not occur, its gonna leave a wide gap in the minds of poeple, so one should go for any person irregardless of where his from.

@post
definitely NO. why? Dnt ask

I'm sorry, no .

what do u girls have against AA guys. i hope u haven't fallen for the stereotype that they are all thugs and baby daddy's/drug dealers. u shouldn't eliminate partners soley based on ethnicity

bawomolo:

what do u girls have against AA guys. i hope u haven't fallen for the stereotype that they are all thugs and baby daddy's/drug dealers. u shouldn't eliminate partners soley based on ethnicity

how does saying NO explain why i dnt want an AA?. . . I dnt want one period. . . its just like a White person saying they wnt marry a Nigerian. . .there are reasons behind it. . .dnt ask. if you want an AA go for her. diff strokes for diff folks abi?

Ok, ok, I take my no back. _{more attracted to Italian guys anyway .}

if you want an AA go for her. diff strokes for diff folks abi?

i'm not settling down any time soon so how did u come to this conclusion. y don't u want to state the reasons u won't date AA. it's understandable if u are not attracted to them

bawomolo:

i'm not settling down any time soon so how did u come to this conclusion. y don't u want to state the reasons u won't date AA. it's understandable if u are not attracted to them

i did not say you're settling down soon o. . .am just saying if you want one go for her. . . Ok, AM NOT ATTRACTED TO ONE. .

@ Topic

Honestly, I can't

Some ladies might not want to be open about this but I guess telling the truth is not always easy. I don't know if this thread is for guys or not but the reasons African ladies maynot want to marry African American guys might be because some of African American guys look and dress like gangsters, school drop outs, smoke weed, use and abuse many women simply said impregnate anything that comes their way[condom have cut this trend down by over %75, imagine if condom didn’t exist? It will be a disaster in a way, women are to be blamed for this too, it will rarely happen if they didn’t consent to it]. A.A. guys don’t resemble their parents wish and wants,  most African parents can’t stand akata so they pass that on to their sons and daughters, want some one that can relate to their culture, and last but not least they just don’t get them. So am I. I am just kidding. No, actually is true.

But all this applies to African guys in the US who forget where they came from and want to be akata if you know want that means. This issue still applies to African guys who date or marry African American ladies. I am not aware of my age mates who date African American ladies. Why? That’s another thread. One thing I dislike about African American ladies is their behavior. Bitchy behavior. Not all but most of them. This also apply to any lady, bitchy behavior doesn’t help. Some one may ask what is bitchy behavior. That will be another thread. Is not a gender issue but a culture issue.

A lot of African guys I know date White ladies. Why? That’s another thread.  The once that I know that have married, for some reason end up with African ladies. Why? That’s another thread. There are some African guys that use women and then go back home and marry Ms. Innocent who may not be actually what she seems to be.  They go home like they have been waiting for Ms. right. Also you have to be aware that these guys have baby mamas all over the states, New York, DC, Cali, Oklahoma, the list is endless. Some times you wonder what they do with their money, they don’t drive good cars or live in a luxury place, it have all gone paying child support. Some will even move to another  state after impregnating a lady just to avoid child support. There are some African ladies that I know that don’t date at all, I guess they are waiting for Mr.  right who I am sure is not going to be as clean as their wife to be. or may be because all the African guys have gone dating White ladies, excluding me but don’t be surprised if it happens any time. Do I prefer White ladies over my Sisters? That’s another thread.

All the African guys who have had babies with different women all over the place should be ashamed of them selves especially those who have avoided paying child support or even worse those who have persuaded the lady to have an abortion.



Peace.

I am to sorry but I can't marry a AA guy not at this time of my life when am trying to settle down by starting a family, I need good,loving,caring, trusthworthy, respectful and handworking husband, someone that can offer me a stable house and family, a father to my children, someone that understand the meaning of family, that knows the value and moral of my culture.

Don't get me wrong have dated AA during my teens years but now is time to focus on my goals.

I want a man that's greats my parents and family in a respectful way not saying Hi or hey. I don't want or need my family making an appointment with him before they are allow to see me or my children. I want my kids to be able to speak my langauge and understand it clearly.

AA guys are rude, no future plans, no moral,no goal.

Marrying a AA is like taking 10steps backward.

I love my Africans men, even though they can be controlling sometimes but I see a bright future with them. One love my Naija brothers.

thank you 2pac , 50 Cent, MTV, channel O etal for providing the classic stereotype of African American men. please do tell - is the same obama of so much political section fame not african american?

it would seem that most of the peeps knocking african american men must be resident in housing projects - since that seems to be where the bulk of the 'AA' men they have met come from

y'all need to take it easy with the tv .it can giv yall a distorted perspective on demographics

Same old stories!
Nairaland is becoming boring day by day
Law of diminishing returns settin in?

No i can't, i'm too attached to my roots.

Being Nigerian isn't even still enough, it has to be my tribe.

I tried to date one many years ago in between many of ma stop and go marriages. This boy was fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine, educated, independent and a strong believer of "Quanzaa". Spoke very well without any "ebonic accent" and with his mother and his father still living together after over 30 years.  No phocking ooooooooooooooh, just friends for like months even years in and out of ma marriages.

Anyway, I decide to put that "friendship" to test.  I cooked him Eba and Egusi soup with "dawadawa" and okporoko inside.   My people,  he he he he he he he he heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!  The bobo nearly died! The boy sneeze soteyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, I nearly rushed him to the ER!   He tried so hard to be so polite about the whole "lunch date", but you could tell he was not impressed with the delicacy I made for him. I don't think he even swallowed half a bite before he broke out in hives.   Her asked me if is was the "bark" of a tree I put inside the "sauce"?  He did not come to ma house again.  Only on the telephone we talked oooooooooooooooooh till I renewed ma vows, and he disappeared into the thin air!


@Topic. . . .Impossible! After the sex. . . .blah blah blah blah blah?  Wetin we go talk?   Tupac abi na Usher?  I can never datet one, not to talk of marry one.  Not culturally compartible at all.  It is easier for Nigerian men to date "Black" American ladies than for Nigerian men to date "Black American" guys, and we all know the reason why.

Nigerian girls are not carried away by freakish sexual habits.  Most Nigerian guys have never experienced a reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeal BJ, so when a lady from another culture especially "Black American" expert ladies get a hold that "Mandingo" JT and use it to brush their teeth morning, afternoon and night. . . . .the poor village Nigerian guy can never leave there, having found a new religion!   Wetin im know?

almondjoy:


Nigerian girls are not carried away by freakish sexual habits.  Most Nigerian guys have never experienced a reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeal BJ, so when a lady from another culture especially "Black American" expert ladies get a hold that "Mandingo" JT and use it to brush their teeth morning, afternoon and night. . . . .the poor village Nigerian guy can never leave there, having found a new religion!   Wetin im know?

So are you implying that is the only reason African men take up with us? I mean, is it really that serious. Maybe it's the AA women that you know.

Nigerian girls are not carried away by freakish sexual habits.  Most Nigerian guys have never experienced a reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeal BJ, so when a lady from another culture especially "Black American" expert ladies get a hold that "Mandingo" JT and use it to brush their teeth morning, afternoon and night . . . . .the poor village Nigerian guy can never leave there, having found a new religion!   Wetin im know?

lol        

Ms. Lurker:

So are you implying that is the only reason African men take up with us? I mean, is it really that serious. Maybe it's the AA women that you know.

What else is there? They are on this thread. . .ask them?   Do you motivate them to get a higher level of education or leave them your forefathers' inheritance or what?  It is just that women from other cultures will do anything in the bedroom a typical African woman will NEVER do.  I say ask them. . . they are on Nairaland. . . let them come and prove me wrong. The reason why after all that "freakishness". . . the Nigerian men still leave and return to home base. . . .after all said and done.  The only ones who remain are those who really feel committed (not love) to their wives from different cultures or those who are being blackmailed by lot of IRS and INS secrets. . . . . JUJU!

almondjoy:

What else is there? They are on this thread. . .ask them? Do you motivate them to get a higher level of education or leave them your forefathers' inheritance or what? It is just that women from other cultures will do anything in the bedroom a typical African woman will NEVER do. I say ask them. . . they are on Nairaland. . . let them come an prove me wrong. The reason why after all that "freakishness". . . the Nigerian men still leave and return to home base. . . .after all that. The only ones who remain are those who really feel committed (not love) to their wives from different cultures or those who are being blackmailed by lot of IRS and INS secrets!



What type of women do you know? I know some are like that, I'm sure but there are still generalisations. And from what I've heard in some African relationships, some people don't marry for love either.

Just saying, I'm an AA but I know for one thing, I've dated African men and they were more "freaky" than me. I was the one to put the breaks on things. So maybe it's already embedded in their DNA.

And marriages in Naija don't have blackmail or guilt attached to them?

I'm a realist but a lot of what you are saying is true but I don't think it flies for everyone. It depends on the two people involved. But that's just me.

Lmao stillwater, they are known for only liking black women as their mistresses

DeNiro excluded  

Ms. Lurker:



What type of women do you know? I know some are like that, I'm sure but there are still generalisations. And from what I've heard in some African relationships, some people don't marry for love either.

Just saying, I'm an AA but I know for one thing, I've dated African men and they were more "freaky" than me. I was the one to put the breaks on things. So maybe it's already embedded in their DNA.

And marriages in Naija don't have blackmail or guilt attached to them?

I'm a realist but a lot of what you are saying is true but I don't think it flies for everyone. It depends on the two people involved. But that's just me.

They are freakier than you?  You just proved me right.  Those ones have certainly been with the best of teachers.  You cannot compare the averaged teenager in Africa to the average teenager in America for example.  A typical 12 year old in America has had MouthAction in the back of a school bus or behind a gas station somewhere.  I told you the typical African guy finds a new religion in "freakishness" and as you know. . . .will become a better specimen of any religion he wishes to practice even better than those who invented it.  They would overtake you in such matters I swear because that is what they do best. . . .becoming more religous that the pope himself.

When I was in school here, if you see what girls do to get attention from guys. . . .I was shocked.  Of course the typical white and "Black American" dudes where used to such fantasies and were frankly bored by such.  But trust our African brothers who have never seen a naked body in broad daylight!  Hog heaven!

These girls made video tapes of themselves naked. . some took pictures of themselves in all kinds of positions and dropped them in the folders of some African guys or passing them around in class while lectures where going on. . . .disrupting the whole class. One handsome Ugandan guy for example, was able to share with us what those "Black American" female students wanted to do with him in that school.  That guy would have flunked out of school with the daily bombardments of naked bodies these girls and women where distributing every hour, but for the special grace of God. I hope he is still alive. We had fun with those pictures.   I still have some copies ma self!  You will be shocked at what these ladies were communicating, including naked body parts.  Now I know better. . . nothing shocks me anymore.  But to the new comer from one bush in Africa?  he he he he he he he, hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!  They go quite crazy and I can't blame them at all.

almondjoy:

They are freakier than you?  You just proved me right.  Those ones have certainly been with the best of teachers.  You cannot compare the averaged teenager in Africa to the average teenager in America for example.  A typical 12 year old in America has had MouthAction in the back of a school bus or behind a gas station somewhere.  I told you the typical African guy finds a new religion in "freakishness" and as you know. . . .will become a better specimen of any religion he wishes to practice even better than those who invented it.  They would overtake you in such matters I swear because that is what they do best. . . .becoming more religous that the pope himself.

When I was in school here, if you see what girls do to get attention from guys. . . .I was shocked.  Of course the typical white and "Black American" dudes where used to such fantasies and were frankly bored by such.  But trust our African brothers who have never seen a naked body in broad daylight!  Hog heaven!

These girls made video tapes of themselve naked. . some took pictures of themselves in all kinds of positions and dropped them in the folders of some African guys. One hansome Ugandan guy for example was able to share with us what those "Black American" female students wanted to do with him in that school. That guy would have flunked out of school with the daily bombardments of naked bodies these girls and women where distributing every hour. We had fun with those pictures. I still have some copies ma self!  You will be shocked at what these ladies were communicating, including naked body parts.  Now I know better. . . nothing shocks me anymore.  But to the new comer from one bush in Africa?  he he he he he he he, hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!  They go quite crazy and I can't blame them at all.

From what I hear from my homeboy on the continent, the girls at his university are just as bad these days. So maybe it's a new craze.

I think it all depends on what excites you. So chicks in the US, here, they hear a new accent and it excites them.

But don't African women get excited when an American comes to visit too or an Westernized Nigerian/African? Wasn't one topic on here about girls parading around to marry some uniquely gifted looking German man to be his wife?


I mean say what you want. We might have some type of differences when it comes to getting and keeping a man but I don't think it's that different. Maybe I'll have to consult with my African male friends.

But they've told me that I'm not like most Americans. I have NO idea what that means, either.

@AJ

Your generation dey very different.Naija girls these days do anything-blow jobs,Bleep(set as we dey call am ),e.t.c The only thing I haven't seen is girls willing to make out with each other for your pleasure. No Naija girl ever suggested bringing her female friend into bed

Are you talking of our girls that have a higher level of STDs than Westerners? So where did they get their STDs,from sitting on toilet seats?

sleeping with black american men

@poster

One man's meat,another one's poison
I can marry anyone,as long as the person will make a good husband, the factor here 4 me is understanding/love,if all these are in place,then am on my way to heaven on earth.
I will marry cus of who the person is and not what he is, culture as much as am concern can never be a barrier for me
If i may ask, of what use will culture be without happiness 4 me. ??
Whereeva my happiness lies,there will i go
And whereeva God willet, thus will i accept
AA, American o, I wont mind, bottomline is be happy

Ms. Lurker:

But they've told me that I'm not like most Americans. I have NO idea what that means, either.

My boyfriend who is Nigerian has said the same thing to me - I have yet to figure that one out. When we first started dating, he kept coming up with different ways to ask me if I smoked (like he would catch me in a lie), he was so impressed with the level of education that exist amongst my family members, and the list goes on and on. I like you Ms. Lurker, asked him what type of AA's he was used to being around??

He even went as far as to suggest that I behave the way I do because I have a southern upbrining (IMAGINE?) .

well southerners have the myth of being quite conservative in comparision to others