Watever you do . . .do not stay with that guy.
Hear him say that the only place she can get something from him is in Canada because that is the place that they were probably recognized as common law and he said he will declare bankruptcy over . . .what a smart loser.

@sistawoman . . .did you read her post where she said the guy has hit her before . . if she remains with him, he will hit her over and over and over again . . she won't do shit cos she ain't got nada . .no dime!!

just run to your family abeg. It is never too late to start all over again. You said you are canadian citizen, look for subsidized daycare. They should have one over there where you can enroll your kids.

There isn't much you can do at this point since you are knocked up.

jemima2007:

sistawoman

yes i did
thanx

i decided to move on and forget about the money

he told me that the only country that i will get money from him is canada because of that he going to declare himself bankrupt in that country

i was a fool , i deserve it

the guy is soooooo annoyingly smart.
Your case is indeed really complicated. That kind of a human being is indeed capable of taking a life.

True friends and Family will always be there for you no matter how mad they are at you.

let them know that you have finally agreed with them about this guy and you wanna leave him.

Try your family. . . . sorry and I do feel for u.
This thing called love . . .makes all us act stupidly

It goes both ways . . . why not also blame the 18yr olds running after men old enough to be their grand fathers?

all na longer throat . . . long throat for the old men and longer the young girls!

zitar:

Yes i expect you to read it ok. I did and it was hard but
i finished it and gained something you should too

good for you . . . .got better things to do so I will take a rain check on that.

idupaul:

why are u slandering us? did any one break your heart here?

@poster, especially this guy.
run from him cos he's a pest and a Doofus!!

you can't force someone to love you . . .if its not working, let it go.

Looking for a true christian guy on Nairaland?

u won't find any on here and if u do . . .run, cos he's a fake!!

Hey . . .if you feeling the person. Why not?
its not liek y'all are shagging right away.

did you really expect someone to read all that essay?

@Jemima . . . i have been trying to get a hold of you about this your post.

Do not listen to sistawoman o . . .u will only end up digging more grave for yourself.

First, I think Tombolo is right. It is longer throat that pushed you to where you are now. If I may ask, after 2 kids, how come both you never talked about marriage? U loved him enough to bore the fool 2 kids so why not marry him?

Why else would you stay with someone that treats you like dirt and trash? why would u remain with someone that calls you names and won't even give you pocket money . . .u better leave the guy and move on with your life. Do not wait until he gives you HIV. If it is not the longer throat, u better leave . . .all that glitters is not gold and everything is not all about money, money, money. All the same, the deed has been done so no point in condemning you or blaming yourself.

finally, u asked where you should start from . . . I am sure the guy has dragged you from your family, no wonder they do not like him. Go back to your family. No matter how much they despises u, they will never turn their backs on you. Go to them with your kids, cry and roll on the floor . . .they will listen to you. Don't you have any brothers and sisters to go to for help? How about friends, you can move in with one of your friends and get your life back in other. You went to school, didn't you? look for a job to care for your kids and I believe that legal aid is available in Canada. You are qualified for legal aid and counsel and entitled to a lwayer. You will be granted one.

Piece of advise . . .remove the name of your daughter from the post. It is enough that instead of spending time with your kids, you are chasing money up and down with some low life guy.

Ignore Idupaul . . .the guy is known to be an A**hole on this site.

honestly . . . has the guy raised his hands on you b4? has he beat or hit you b4?

all this gold digger wahala will kill all of una!!

michelin89:

Are you daft?

Haven't you seen the countless threads on this topic?

LMAO

cut your jacket according to your size.
start dating the poor ones or better still . . .find church sistas, they don't chase money!

sistawoman:

I don't need a man to secure my future either as I did it on my FUCKING own. The problem with your thinking is that I am not going to let another BITCH come in and reap the rewards for what i helped him build. Children are far more resilient then you give them credit. Parenting and love can change anything. You mean to tell me you do everything like your mom and dad. No I would have to say that is incorrect. You, everyone, picks what they want from their parents and use it or loose it.

He turned his back on his children because he is less than a man. What that shows about me is that at 14 (when i started dating him) I made the wrong choice in men. Please tell me what 14 year old you know ready to make a life long choice like that? So yes please insult me because i was stupid and young and thought i knew it all. My bad!!!!

tough luck to you . . . besides at 14, I was glued to my books and not chasing men. ain't ma fault.
whether another BITCH comes in and reap from the business or not is her punishment for letting the guy put the business under his name. If she was smart, the guy ain't married to her and she went ahead and let the business be registered under his name? it could have been in their kids name, that way she won't be regretting now.

all the same . . .she needs to leave that abusive relationship fast!

yes!

She can't force you to do unless you too have some craving for her.

it is your call.

Jeez that woman butchered Obama during her speech 2 nights ago.
was all that really necessary?

no offence but that woman is a doofus.

It is the nature of men to cheat but most importantly, a man will cheat on you if you let him to.

sistawoman:


Thanks for your honest reply.

My wish is that no woman has to sit by idly and let her husband treat her like a second class citizen. The point of marriage is to have someone who will be faithful and true to only you.

I know what it feels like to be trapped in a marriage and afraid that you wont be able to feed or care for your children on your own, as i stayed in a marriage for 4 years longer than I should have. But I found that strength, by chance, and I hope that all other women do the same.

Women are the stronger of the species and should know and understand that. I just hope that they take strength from those before us and use that to free ourselves from the slavery that some men subject these women to. Being an independent woman has its pluses and minus but when balanced it can be of so much benefit to ourselves, husbands,children and community.

Madam, it happens all over, nigeria, china, america, europe . . .all men are the same.
American men seems to plan their cheating ways very neatly and are more discreet about it. Nigerian on the other hand . . alot of them grow up to think that such things is more acceptabe and that their women are below them.

@poster,

you need a therapist!

sistawoman:

The reality is the decisons were made, the children were born and she is where she is. No need beating her about the head and neck about what she SHOULD have done. She needs help now to secure her childrens future.

I have three children for the record. All by ONE man. My tubes are tied and my husband and i desire no more children. I was married at 17 for 11 years. So your rate of calculations on my future husbands is way off. By age 50 I should be on husband #3.

Stop giving advice on something you know nothing about.

Madam "I too know" . . . more palm oil to your elbow.
You've been on this site only 3 months and we all know your life history and future endeavors. I don't think that anyone is interested in the fact that you got married at age 17, that you went ahead to tie your womb, that your current husband don't want kids, that you had your 3 kids for an irresponsible man who lives on women and don't want nothing to do with both you and your kids. . . shouldn't that have taught you a lesson? it sure in hell speaks alot about your kind of person. Besides . . .way too much information about oneself on a website like this.

you are just about money, money, money . . .how is securing the future for her kids by remaining in that abusive relationship because she wants money going to help her or the kids? the kids would grow up to be abusive themselves or think it is okay or daddy to call mummy names . . .you would know better because you have been in such relationship and situation before.

As for me, I don't need a man to secure a future for myself and my kids and I am not stupid enough to let some guy use me as his door mat or foot stool because I want to endure, force myself to marry him so that I can later gain half the money.

That advice just has nothing but STUPIDITY written all over it.

dreeldee:

do i need a sign up form to join, i'm ready to pay any amount just to be a member

that bad huh? what did they do to you this time?

Welcome to the club of Naija girls haters!!

sistawoman:

How many kids have you reasied on your own?

I said before:


Addtionally in 6 years that business could triple in profit. That is a risk but to walk away with babies and nothing, nothing, nothing is just plain daft to put it nicely.

Step in my shoes as a single mom for one week and then watch as you change the tune you are singing. I am so glad to be married for the second time in my life at 33 with three children in tow. I guess it can happen.

#1. I don't have any kids and haven't raised any single-handedly but I will not stoop so low and be stupid enough to get myself knocked up by some abusive, immature low life . . .I believe that is why they have PROTECTION!!!

#2. step in your shoes for one week? . . .hey, you made your bed, you lay on it
and props to you for being married for the second time at age 33 . . .you will be a very good role model to alot of single moms out there. As it is right now, you are already converting the poster to marry the guy and divorce him after 6yrs then she can start taking applications for husband #2 just like you. The institution called "MARRIAGE" is no longer sacred anymore to you people . . .get married for money, pop kids as much as you like with 10 different men, get divorced and start sueing each other to split the money and the kids. . .is that what you call life. I bet with the rate at which you are going, at age 50, you will end up with husband #17. . .as long as it ain't working, we can always opt out of it . . .right?

@Poster,
if you know what is good for you . . .take your kids and leave the low life of a guy alone . . .you are 27, you can start your own business and make some good money. You deserve better . . .heck, let the guy even cry and come crawling to you and not you crawling back to him after he's done cheating on you. You deserve better than what you have now. . .unless you are sooooo ugly and have really low self esteem.

MY 25 cents!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We've all had our fair share . . .it has its ups and downs but all you gotta do is be positive and determined and you will pull through.

The poster needs to be Castrated!!

for him to have come online and post such trash? whatever happened to shame and decency??

What kind of married men have you been hanging around cos u need help child!

@ sista woman,

In otherwords, she should stay and endure the abusive nature of the guy because of money right?
even though she was dumb enough to go into the business and allow the guy register it in his own name? . . .and after six years when she has her share then wat happens? divorce him and start looking for another husband at age 33?

She can take are of the kids with or without the money. She has family doesn't she? and what if the business folds before the 6 years is over. . . then she is stuck. And I repeat again, what if the guy gets worse and turns her into his punching bag and trust me I do see this happening since she can easily forgive him and open her legs for him again. You seems like a weakling.

You all need to really think this through . . .stop making 6years seems like ABC.
where is the yeye poster sef? I need to knock some sense into her head.

Leave the married man alone, as simple as that and if he kills you, you deserve it in the first place for shacking up anotha woman's man.