Elewokun:
Bro marriage isn't a child's play. I'm in your shoes. My eyes don see pass your own. Your wife will come back. Just let it slide. It's a war you can't win. At least your mother in-law will now know her boundary a little. Expect more. If I tell you my own story, you will kneel and thank God that yours isn't as bad as mine. Here I am, still surviving the storm. It's not been easy 11 years of marriage for me. Just be patient especially because of your children.

Be patient until you die. Then you succeed in passing the unfought battle to your offsprings as most of you cowards do. The OP did the right thing. Living in trepidation in your own house as a man is hellish. No man should be there

Never!!! This is the third day and am not expecting her back. She can married her mom or her mom can look for someone they can control.

aklion:
Immature response everywhere. Obviously na kids full this platform... Bro if you are a church person involved your spiritual head now. To me don't bother your wife. If she realized what she has done she go find her home. Never you go begging. I repeat never. You stop the devil from broking your home. Your wife vex. No right thinking man would allow a woman to control him no matter what. It's good you took such step. Maintain it.

Congratulations. Better late than never

sisisioge:
How did you confront your mil? Would you be fine if your wife used same style on your mother? She said you disrespected her family...there are a million and one ways to politely ask in laws not to meddle in your affairs without being offensive fa.

Anyways, on a brighter note, the message has been passed across and mama wont be meddling in the future even when you need her to meddle...if there is a future. All of una go dey alright.

This is the only reasonable comment

MrBrownJay1:
you should have done that the FIRST time the mother interfered in your family matters...11yrs of letting her mother believe she was in charge, is way too long and now a waste of energy to try to correct it.

"Any time you decide to wake up is your morning". Its better late than never. Its not too late as it was something that needed to be done eventually.

madridguy:
So this is spiritual problem?

That guy is sick in the head. The brainwashing don really make that one senseless

MrBrownJay1:
you should have done that the FIRST time the mother interfered in your family matters...11yrs of letting her mother believe she was in charge, is way too long and now a waste of energy to try to correct it.

Never say ever.
The perfect time to plant a tree is 20 years ago, the next best time is, NOW.

22rockbottom:
Good Evening,

I got married 11years ago, my mother in-law has always in the picture of everything in our home and has total control of my wife. My wife cannot object anything she says even when I, as her husband challenged it. 90% of the major issues we had as a couple were caused by my mother in-law. After 11years, I decided to confront her to stop controlling her daughter and stop interfering in our marriage and home. I confronted her and my wife left the house. Her reason for leaving the house is that I disrespected her family.

more details later

You gather balls 11 years later to do what you ought to have done 11 years ago and you want us to say something.
You better go run after your wife and tell her sorry as usual which you're obviously going to tell her no matter what Nairalanders say to you.
The boldness is no in vain though, if the mother want peace for her daughter, she will adjust.

My own left because I confronted her 'boyfriend'... Your own is better

I will rather have a baby mama, than have a wife I have no control over.

I was really rude about the confrontation. I was angry and below is why I was angry.

Both my in-laws came to our house, though I knew they were coming but I wasn't cool with it because they were with us last year December/January this year then now. My wife knew I wasn't cool with it but she never cares. We were both sleeping on the same bed but weren't talking. We had an issue one night and she went to report me to her parents, but her parents never call me to ask for my side of the story. That made me more angry so I left the house in the middle of the night. Guess what, I was away for 2nights and both my wife and my in-laws were not bother. They didn't even call. That made me more furious. So I spoke to her rudely.

chatinent:
I hope you were polite sha.


Anyways, leave her be. When she has overstayed her welcome there, those supportive words from them that what she did was right will begin to taste sour.

aklion:
Immature response everywhere. Obviously na kids full this platform... Bro if you are a church person involved your spiritual head now. To me don't bother your wife. If she realized what she has done she go find her home. Never you go begging. I repeat never. You stop the devil from broking your home. Your wife vex. No right thinking man would allow a woman to control him no matter what. It's good you took such step. Maintain it.

Your first line showed you have no brains. What did you say that hasn't been said over and over again? I thought that when you criticised the comments here that you were going to use Estein's theory of relativism quantum physics to explain the situation.

Even a mad man says that everyone is mad. You really dont have sense I must say.

I was really rude about the confrontation. I was angry and below is why I was angry.

Both my in-laws came to our house, though I knew they were coming but I wasn't cool with it because they were with us last year December/January this year then now. My wife knew I wasn't cool with it but she never cares. We were both sleeping on the same bed but weren't talking. We had an issue one night and she went to report me to her parents, but her parents never call me to ask for my side of the story. That made me more angry so I left the house in the middle of the night. Guess what, I was away for 2nights and both my wife and my in-laws were not bother. They didn't even call. That made me more furious. So I spoke to her rudely.

Jayboi:
Whatever you do just make sure you don't overdo it. If Ur conscience is clear that with the way you confronted her mum, it's still within order and not outrightly rude then stand Ur ground. But if u don overvex and spoil things, beg her.
Just that whenever u don't like something, don't keep quiet.

bantilosha:
Don't ever call that kid you call wife to return. If she does, fine. If she doesn't, let her remain with her domineering mother. I won't even have anything to do with a woman that dumb. Even if she returns, stand your masculine ground and tell her you won't tolerate that nonsense ever again. Men are the price.

Gbam!

madridguy:
So this is spiritual problem?

Possibly. Don't rule anything out! But 11years is quite a long time. It's always good to set the tone as soon as possible. He waited too long to act.

22rockbottom:
Good Evening,

I got married 11years ago, my mother in-law has always in the picture of everything in our home and has total control of my wife. My wife cannot object anything she says even when I, as her husband challenged it. 90% of the major issues we had as a couple were caused by my mother in-law. After 11years, I decided to confront her to stop controlling her daughter and stop interfering in our marriage and home. I confronted her and my wife left the house. Her reason for leaving the house is that I disrespected her family.

more details later

SO, U ARE NOW CONFRONTING PEOPLE MOTHER BECAUSE THEY LET YOU MARRY THEIR DAUGHTER?


HOW DID YOUR WIFE BROTHERS FEEL LEARNING WHAT YOU DID TO THEIR MOTHER?


THIS MARRIAGE THING SHOULD BE HANDLED WITH CARE AND NOT RIGHT.


RIGHTS ARE NEVER ABSOLUTE AND WHY SHE LEFT THE HOUSE.


INSTEAD OF HER MOTHER, WHY NOT TALK TO YOUR WIFE?


WILL YOU LIKE FOR YOUR BROTHER INLAWS TO CONFRONT YOUR OWN MOTHER?



EXACTLY!

GoodbutBadguy:

Dear OP, you have no choice but to call your wife and beg her don't take the red pillars approach beg her mom and start taking your wife out, buy gifts for her, start gusting her like you will do to your friends, give her good s*x, and take her on vacations. All these will make her too clingy that she won't want to live you or do anything that will hurt you, though no 1 is perfect.
The problem with most married men is that they see their wives as housewives. The attached image speaks volumes if a human being can make friends with a lion how much more are a man and his wife? The bottom line is your wife isn't confiding in you because you lack human management the common problems of we men

Beg who

Just let your family know what you did, don't call her or beg her. If her mother call you, don't pick up. Even if it takes your wife 2 years to return home

I have the balls from day one. I was just trying to avoid this kind of issue. I'm also an introvert and I respect people a lot.

Microwhy:

You gather balls 11 years later to do what you ought to have done 11 years ago and you want us to say something.
You better go run after your wife and tell her sorry as usual which you're obviously going to tell her no matter what Nairalanders say to you.
The boldness is no in vain though, if the mother want peace for her daughter, she will adjust.

22rockbottom:
Good Evening,

I got married 11years ago, my mother in-law has always in the picture of everything in our home and has total control of my wife. My wife cannot object anything she says even when I, as her husband challenged it. 90% of the major issues we had as a couple were caused by my mother in-law. After 11years, I decided to confront her to stop controlling her daughter and stop interfering in our marriage and home. I confronted her and my wife left the house. Her reason for leaving the house is that I disrespected her family.

more details later

did u disrespect her mum? u can control ur home without disrespecting her mum if u make sure u don't just disagree for the purpose of showing u control ur house bt when it's actually necessary to disagree.


also u need to carry ur wife along on this decision to reduce or stop her mums unnecessary interference in ur family so she(ur wife) understands where ure coming from.

MrBrownJay1:
you should have done that the FIRST time the mother interfered in your family matters...11yrs of letting her mother believe she was in charge, is way too long and now a waste of energy to try to correct it.

Not enough like for this statement

22rockbottom:
Good Evening,

I got married 11years ago, my mother in-law has always in the picture of everything in our home and has total control of my wife. My wife cannot object anything she says even when I, as her husband challenged it. 90% of the major issues we had as a couple were caused by my mother in-law. After 11years, I decided to confront her to stop controlling her daughter and stop interfering in our marriage and home. I confronted her and my wife left the house. Her reason for leaving the house is that I disrespected her family.

more details later

Them don open your eyes , if you take everything serious online, you'll continue to have issues in your relationship.

Eleven good years controlling your life and you want to put stop to that, it will be a daunting task

But you had taken a step and get ready for retaliation from both the mother and daughter.

If she dares you, don't waste time to settle with another woman.

It is part of their strategic to weak you and make you submit

Elewokun:


It's not as easy as you think. Seems you're not married. If you are, you will know the power of "3P's"
Prayer, patience and perseverance

Prayers don't change situations. If it does why confront the mil instead of going on his knee to pray harder?

22rockbottom:
Good Evening,

I got married 11years ago, my mother in-law has always in the picture of everything in our home and has total control of my wife. My wife cannot object anything she says even when I, as her husband challenged it. 90% of the major issues we had as a couple were caused by my mother in-law. After 11years, I decided to confront her to stop controlling her daughter and stop interfering in our marriage and home. I confronted her and my wife left the house. Her reason for leaving the house is that I disrespected her family.

more details later

If the reverse was the case now you won't do anything. Yes you disrespected her family

Wodu89:
You managed to spin the narrative that the mother in law is evil. Share the core details of what happened and stop trying to tell the tale with you as the victim in it


Watch fools begin to vilify the woman and her family.

Hypocrite

You're a wise man

iHateFraudsters:
If my wife dares leave my house for 24hrs, then she'll stay out permanently.

Cos she'll have a hard time explaining the man she went to visit.

Story 😅

jaxxy:


did u disrespect her mum? u can control ur home without disrespecting her mum if u make sure u don't just disagree for the purpose of showing u control ur house bt when it's actually necessary to disagree.


also u need to carry ur wife along on this decision to reduce or stop her mums unnecessary interference in ur family so she(ur wife) understands where ure coming from.

MOST NIGERIANS ARE MAD.


THEN YOU HAVE THOSE WITH REHEARSED MADNESS.


MEANING THEY ARE ENCOURAGED BY FRIENDS OR WHAT THEY READ TO ASSERT DOMINANCE.


SOME, ARE JUST MAD AND WANT TO DOMINATE.


SO, THEY ARE NOT RATIONAL OR LOGICAL.


IT IS ALL ABOUT, I SAID SO AND WHAT I SAY MUST STAND.


CRAZY NIGERIAN MEN!

22rockbottom:
Good Evening,

I got married 11years ago, my mother in-law has always in the picture of everything in our home and has total control of my wife. My wife cannot object anything she says even when I, as her husband challenged it. 90% of the major issues we had as a couple were caused by my mother in-law. After 11years, I decided to confront her to stop controlling her daughter and stop interfering in our marriage and home. I confronted her and my wife left the house. Her reason for leaving the house is that I disrespected her family.

more details later

you did the right thing
Allow your wife to stay at her mother house

If she get sense
She will come back

I was actually rude about the confrontation. I was angry and below is why I was angry.

Both my in-laws came to our house, though I knew they were coming but I wasn't cool with it because they were with us last year December/January this year then now. My wife knew I wasn't cool with it but she never cares. We were both sleeping on the same bed but weren't talking. We had an issue one night and she went to report me to her parents, but her parents never call me to ask for my side of the story. That made me more angry so I left the house in the middle of the night. Guess what, I was away for 2nights and both my wife and my in-laws were not bother. They didn't even call. That made me more furious. So I spoke to her rudely.

Note: My wife is a sweet soul without the influence of her mother.

sisisioge:
How did you confront your mil? Would you be fine if your wife used same style on your mother? She said you disrespected her family...there are a million and one ways to politely ask in laws not to meddle in your affairs without being offensive fa.

Anyways, on a brighter note, the message has been passed across and mama wont be meddling in the future even when you need her to meddle...if there is a future. All of una go dey alright.

Don't beat yourself too hard, you did the right thing.

Though you did it a little bit later but right is right no matter when it's done.

If she doesn't wanna come back because of that, do what you currently are doing, survive. They are playing games right now, don't give in at all. They will fight back but stand your ground and see them fumble.

I hate subtle manipulation. I'm of the opinion that If you wanna do shit, do it to my face and don't play games.