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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Issues In My Marriage (25334 Views)
Gender And Chores- Issues In Relationships And Marriages / How Virginity Almost Destroyed My Marriage - Thanks To Nlanders / I Am Very Unhappy In My Marriage (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Issues In My Marriage by Nobody: 3:36pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
jennykadry: Still singing to my darling GAGGI. The love of my life, my knight in shining armour. Omo 4get say we dey yab for here. Make dis thing nor go turn to d real kolo level o. Make u chill na... roflmao |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by sweetcocoa(f): 3:37pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
jennykadry: ![]() ![]() ![]() |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by Decency75: 4:11pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
jennykadry: Chei, this madness don dey enter Ochanja market. Jenny who did this for you. Tufiakwa, it will not be well for that person. |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by freshmoney(m): 4:25pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
sweetcocoa: I'm not married and that's cos i asked him to wait for sometime,btw this isn't about solving violence with violence,for crying out loud,how can a SIL come to take over my house,my baby and even my bed,yet someone expects me to fold my hands and watch that happen? What does adighi eme ya eme have to do with what I wrote? By the way, what is the meaning? Hope you are not swearing here ![]() Nigerian women, especially igbo, e get as e be ![]() |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by skypower(f): 4:47pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
Sorry sis, if the truth willn't be too bitter, urself and ur husband show signs of immaturity. An happy marriage is not about "ME" it must be about mutual benefit. U husband could ve done better by putting the 2 of u in ur places & never take side with anyone. Frankly, its in ur own interest that ur husband did not take side with u, but he did not ve to roll u in the mud in their face NEVER. The work is in ur hands, woman are the HOME MAKER. Involving ur parents will only make matter worst, I tell u. Try shifting ground without loosing ground, i mean u dont ve to take shit, but u ve to be accommodating. I don't no why its always trouble when two grown up ladies stay together. Its ur house, its ur family, no matter how long she stay she will have to leave, keep ur family alive not allow anything, and anybody destroy ur dream. If u have to swoop, then SWOOP TO CONQUER. It is well 1 Like |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by sweetcocoa(f): 4:49pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
freshmoney: ![]() |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by dayokanu(m): 5:03pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
See scope, Ibo women and sense. As we speak now, Ifyalways dey "busy" with harakiri, JK don use style collect like 5 e-boyfriends for herself sharp sharp while all those Yorubas like Busybody, ronke and chaircover dey dull demselves Very soon now JK and all these guys like Gaggi, reinedamsey , decency etc would be on IM having hot steamy kpekusing and born pikin while the single girls are on romance section fighting 190 and Mr Cork Jenny I salute you ooo |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by ronkebp(f): 5:08pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ No guy worths my extra time on NL....what will i do with e-boyfriends that one trouser is longer than one, with dirty singlets and dusty sneakers!!!! hmmm ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by ebunchi(f): 5:14pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
About the issue of 'finding happiness in your kitchen' ... I find that bit funny tho cheesy... What about dishing your husbands food into a flask immediately after cooking, also dishing yours into another flask. Leave hers in the pot so that when she comes in, she can happily scrape the remaining in the pot. This way she's happy she dished from the pot and you're happy you' dished yours first. If I were you, I'll totally ignore her and find a way round her immaturity without reducing my self to her level, but then again it's your call. GOd bless you recruitmnt ![]() |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by reinedamse: 5:38pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
dayokanu: See scope, Ibo women and sense.I'm not a man,i'm a lady. Comprehendez ![]() ![]() |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by drnoel: 5:41pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
GboyegaD: [/b] U most definitely misunderstood me. None of the family has or shares any right to dictate in their family and home. That right is left 4 only the couple in question, but would u, cos its ur right 2 dictate, handle the situation like the poster did. Would u urself that is talking, go and confront ur inlaw who came 2 visit u cos he entered ur wife's kitchen 2 take meat from the soup. Think about it ma guy. I know u'd say its a woman's stuff but would u do so. If u think clearly, u'd agree with me that the poster took laws in2 her hand, regardless it was her home, when she could have easily spoken 2 her hubby, so as not 2 lose face in the eyes of her in laws. |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by Nobody: 5:47pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
jennykadry: NA LIE! This can not be Jennykadry. How dare he assult you and you did not DIVORCE him as you have been advising poor ladies on this forum? I find this hard to believe-a whole HARD babe like you? WTF? Ordinary pillow na him you throw na hin he come give you pinfall? All those f00lish and impressionable ladies lapping up this womans advise need to open their eyes and minds. Respect your husbands the same way she respects her own husband. Blow jab for 15 minutes after assult? The mind boggles! This is what intelligent posters have been saying for years-These women are deadly-they will advise you to divorce/disrespect your husband while their homes are worst than yours. A word is enough for the wise woman. |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by drnoel: 5:49pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
Busy_body: really, then u can do exactly what the poster did now and see where it gets u i.e if u are married. No matter how much ur in law irritates u, one should act maturely in handling them. |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by Nobody: 5:57pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
@Jennykadry, Maybe I am wrong,maybe you are one of those ladies that like being assaulted before intimacy Are you a M.A.S.O.C.H.I.S,T.I.C lady? |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by benvivi: 6:42pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
@ gaggi why don't u take corrections u deranged thing why are u insulting ur LovePeddler mother who didn't have the courtsy to tell u who ur ve the courtesy to tell u who ur mistake of a father was tell d world how ur mother died giving u a Mouth Action.n dat are men don't talk they act but ur case is pitiable cos u are just a minus to manhood , |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by neyostica: 7:13pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
SMDH |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by Nobody: 9:36pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
Lol @ richy. I trust you to show up. Oloshi. A man held me to calm me down for 2 minutes lest I throw a heavy bedside lamp with glass at him and you are here saying assault, do you know how many times I out of anger tried to throw deadly weapon at him? Just because I did not get my way? Haaaa bless the first year of my marriage, no dull moment in that house. ![]() ![]() Women do not allow men manhandle you oooo. Speak up and kick any mans azz that abuses you, else you will all end up like titi and OGO. Women that get punched everyday and beaten blue black do not deserve the eediots that do that to them. My mum was never hit by my father and she told me never to allow that happen in my house and so far I bless God for the real born again Christian he blessed me with. A man that will rather walk out of the house than stay one minute to forget slaps on my face. Lol@dayo |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by maryini(f): 10:08pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
@Jennykadry: I love you hubby! God bless him. But if it was a man did what you did (to a woman) it would have been another story. |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by ronkebp(f): 10:24pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
jennykadry: Lol @ richy. I trust you to show up. Oloshi. A man held me to calm me down for 2 minutes lest I throw a heavy bedside lamp with glass at him and you are here saying assault, do you know how many times I out of anger tried to throw deadly weapon at him? Just because I did not get my way? Haaaa bless the first year of my marriage, no dull moment in that house. JENNY TWO OF US NO FIT LIVE FOR THE SAME HOUSE, WE GO BREAK THINGS TIRE!!!! ![]() ![]() |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by Nobody: 10:27pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
True @ martini This is why I do not support any form of abuse from any gender, I was young then and was used to gra gra way of settling issues. My parents knew me to be the hot tempered one and tried to calm it down for where? Then this dude came and found it intriguing and a huge "turn on" . Infact i think sometimes back then he pissed me off just to see me display action lol. I remember one day I was reporting one of my class mate to him and after talking for a while, I was like " why am I still talking I will see her tomorrow in class" , the tomorrow came and I could not leave the house cos he locked the door and hid the keys, I went upstairs and asked him if he'd seen the keys, he was like " ehen, I locked it now before you will go and beat someone's daughter and me i don't have one kobo to bail you out of jail with", I just laughed at him that day and went back upstairs. After a while he came to me and said " it's okay to walk away if you think you are going to say something nasty to someone" and I kinda agreed wih him and started walkin away from people at school, then one day I walked away from him during a disagreement, another day I did the same thig and because I walked past him I caught this look on his face that touched me raw and hard in the chest, I turned back and went to sit down beside him, he no talk oo, so I moved closer and just kinda was looking at him, he smiled and that was the day I knew "hey, you really can do this" and gbam I stopped whooping azzes ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by Nobody: 10:33pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
ronkebp: Lol ronkesus my partner in crime ![]() ![]() |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by ronkebp(f): 10:36pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
^^^^^^ I love that Jenny, NL is not enough, if i should start saying what i have gotten away with in my marraige that i know, other men with krace will not take, i always Thank God, my hubby is very hot-headed too oooo, but krace dey bow for krace, moreso, he is not given to violence, i will just stay in one corner and vent and will want to keep marlice, trust my hubby not to allow that marlice to take place, that is when i will be angrier even the more.... i love to always have my space once am angry, and he won't give me that space ooo, i won't have a choice than to just calm down by force by fire and we will laugh over the whole wahala i just caused. |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by dayokanu(m): 10:46pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
If na me be your husband Person wey no like wahala, our communication would be via facebook |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by Nobody: 10:57pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
Ronke that man put up with so much craze from me that all I do now is just shower him with love and let him reap the fruit of his labor ![]() @dayo Facebook no dey then naaaa. Lol, I go find you wherever you dey and vex even the more. Shebi you will still come back home for some nice kpekusing abi we do am via FB |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by isalegan2: 11:53pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
debby999: Dear married women and men,pls I need your advice on this issue. I just had a baby boy and still on recovery, my sister inlaw came and Since then my peaceful home has turn to war zone. As am writting this I feel like runing away with my little boy.This lady has never talked to me since she came into the house.she is type that does my "brother's house I don't send anybody".Big war started the day I finished cooking and was about dishing food this lady went to pot and started taking her own. After she finished the eating, I called her and explain to her as I should to my younger ones, that it was not right for her to take the food I just finished cooking without letting me knw. Most times they will take all the meat in the food. The next day my husband called me that her siSter reported me to him. So I told him and he to said it was right. I didn't knw they have tabled the matter with their other sisters and all of them called me and saying I must allow their sis. To go the pot anything anytime she wants which I refused,she was just calling me names. I was suprised when she said my husband supported that the lady should be allowed. My husband came in I told him all that happened,he couldn't stand on his ground to defened his wife infront of his sisters. I felt unprotected. The last one that happened that made me write this was the day my husband brought up dat issue again,bcose he noticed his sister has not been eaten the food in the house. He said I have to treat his sisters with care and piortity and if I don't treat them dat way, bcose a always insist on the right thing, dat anything I see I should take.I told him since you cannot give me protection I have to let my parents knw about incase anything happens to me.called my parents to let them. My baby started crying I bathed him and gave him the baby so I can prepare his food. On bringing the food to feed him,my husband pushed me out, took the food frm me and gave his sister to feed him. Carried me up and threw me on the bed, my hand hit the wardrobe, I was carrying. I dressed up to get a recharge card to let my people knw, he carried me up again and threw me on thE bed. I have to sneaked out late at night when he was sleeping. I called them and I was scared to go back again, I remebered my baby I had to go back. When I got back he has gone out to look for me, I opend my room to sleep, I found his sisters sleeping on my bed, I left them and slept on the couch. I asked the little girl he said my husband told them to sleep there. Am no longer feel protected with him. Since he can humulaite his wife in the presence of his sisters. Waiting for advice. Sorry for the errors, typed it in hurry so I can attend to my baby. ThAnks all. debby999: @feminie are u married? If my own sisters would cook and ask me to come and dish the food. I would explain someone dat wil almost push u down,struggling with u in ur own. All in the name of my brothers kitten. I bought everything dat kittchen. Do u that kittchen is a woman's department. My husband agreed with me only to turned back me when his sisters confronted him. Interesting. I would ordinarily be predisposed to take your side. But your story is full of holes, deliberately told in a manner to make you look the injured party. Lots have been said by others already, and I cannot read all the posts, but I will only address one glaring issue: If you left the house in the middle of the night and your husband was so worried he also left the house to look for you, who was it that was caring for your infant that you left behind? The sister(s), right? So, if you have your own room, wouldn't that mean that your baby likely sleeps with you in your bed or a crib next to your bed. It would be reasonable to expect that whoever is caring for the baby would be in the same room with the baby, no? I think that explains you finding her in your bed. Nevertheless, it's time for your sister in law to go. She already is reticent about eating your food anyway, to avoid more drama. So, it looks like all the women are tired of each other. Just do the needful and carry on with your lives. ![]() 2 Likes |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by Outstrip(f): 11:58pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
dayokanu: If na me be your husband ROTFLMAO. Okay se you will make love via facebook too |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by Outstrip(f): 12:03am On Apr 21, 2012 |
Ronke and Jenny I wish you guys were my sister in laws. My dad would have enjoyed you guys LOL |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by Nobody: 12:05am On Apr 21, 2012 |
[b]@Jennykadry, This is a very amusing attempt to defend violence in your masochist1c relationship with your husband. 1.From your initial post he PINNED you on the bed for two minutes so that you could not move while you recovered from your brain wave? 2.You have equally admitted to being a loose cannon in the early stages of your marriage where every thing was meant to be decimated. 3.You were fond of throwing heavy objects at your husband. 4.You normally gave him 15 minute blow jabs after these incidents of extreme violence. These are all facts from your post because I was not there,however I have stated these facts to show that Violence in a relationship is not the monopoly of any one of the sexes.Men and women can be violent in any relationship in equal measure,however if it was a man that was exhibiting this kind of attitude to a woman-you and your cohorts would be up in arms and would be calling that man all kinds of names. Jenny it is rather funny that you keep stating that it was in an early stage of your marrriage-that you wer exhibiting these brain waves and that you have now changed?That means you agree that human beings are not static and that human beings can change?The question Madam loose cannon,is why do you not give poor women in fresh relationships the chance for their husbands to change?Rather you take pleasure in advising such women to leave their husbands?Do you even know what you are doing to peoples relationships?Do you realise the evil havoc you are creating in cyberspace? If you and your husband can change from a rabble rousing couple,what stops other people from improving their relationships?Why all this advise of DIVORCE!DIVORCE!!DIVORCE!!! The advise I have for those women always bringing their problems online is be careful which advise you take,because a lot of the women you come to for advise are either in worse relationships than you are or are women that are on the shelf and not married or proberbly just living with a man without any formal marriage rites. A word is enough for the wise.Meanwhile Jenny,please continue your masoch1sm-You and I know whats going on![/b] 3 Likes |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by Nobody: 12:55am On Apr 21, 2012 |
Outstrip: Ronke and Jenny I wish you guys were my sister in laws. My dad would have enjoyed you guys LOL No you all would have fought like violent cats. ![]() |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by Nobody: 12:56am On Apr 21, 2012 |
Lol@ outstrip The man saw hell in my hands. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Outstrip I feel like causing another commotion, remembering those sweet times is turning me on to do another bad. ![]() ![]() @david Honestly I enjoyed it, I still rake ooo but I Try not to break things ![]() |
Re: Issues In My Marriage by Nobody: 1:02am On Apr 21, 2012 |
jennykadry: Lol@ outstrip your husband na my twin brother. ![]() |
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