Efemena_xy:

I'm at a loss for words here. Someone help me out pls!

Deols, do you understand that divorce is not a 'Get-out-of-jail-free' card? It's used as a last resort IF all else fails AND the couple in question have exhausted all options/possibilities for reconciliation.

You don't go about advising a couple to get divorced barely a year after tying the knot!

Just quit dishing out the Nollywood advice, okay?

jennykadry: May EX girlfriends snatch the husbands and boyfriends of all the women supporting this rubbish. What a shame. Tufiakwa

I know you've been itching to 'VENT' on me after trying to avoid you like a palm oil....now the door is open SPILL! thing thing DO your thing!!!

jennykadry:

I watched a similar nollywood movie recently starring Van Vicker but the ending was different. Van Vicker chased his wife away and married his mistress. Fast forward to many years later after he has tasted both women, he decided to go back to his wife he abandoned. Anyways after much begging and kneeling, she accepted him back and became the queen of his heart .

I can imagine.

Now put that stoopid scene in Naija and the "true" wife go do "thanksgiving" in church, conviently forgetting the stress, high BP and possible mental melt down she just must experienced all those years out in the cold.

Meanwhile, no one asks what the man was doing with the mistress in the first place, to have been "juju-ized".

Mtcheew!

Reading through this post confirms that women are truly their own worst enemies. The 'crad in the bucket' lingo is truly not just a cliche. It's painful reading from women as they assidously strive to justify the mutilation of a womans home by another woman.
Pray tell, are there no longer men out there that the OP is thoroughly fixated on this married guy. I have said it earlier the both of them deserves themselves.
I'm sure when next the OP will open a thread about how her 'husband' has made it his new hobby to batter her she'd have gotten a new id then.

jidegirl12:

My dear, nor laugh o!

This thread dey vex person...

Efemena_xy:

My dear, nor laugh o!

This thread dey vex person...

I guess you are the one getting emotional....ANNIE DON RUN COMMOT SEF...they just fit each other thats my message!

Efemena_xy:

I can imagine.

Now put that stoopid scene in Naija and the "true" wife go do "thanksgiving" in church, conviently forgetting the stress, high BP and possible mental melt down she just must experienced all those years out in the cold.

Meanwhile, no one asks what the man was doing with the mistress in the first place, to have been "juju-ized".

Mtcheew!

Haba. It takes one minute to forget all those things. I keep wandering why its the women that end up single and waiting....... The men are always excused. why is it always so? I would be happy to watch a movie where it was too late for the man cos the woman had moved on. I wanna watch that kind of movie.

@CC, na you watch nollywood pass, please suggest names abeg

^^ That one na lie. You never forget.. . . It is a LIE that "Time heals all wounds" . . . . Nope! That is a bloody lie! That some people are good at NUMBING their minds and pretending it all didn't happen does not mean they are healed or have forgotten. Wake the same woman up tomorrow and scare her with a story that her husband's mistress is back again, you go see "mamywater" surface . . ROFLMAO!!

jennykadry:

Haba. It takes one minute to forget all those things. I keep wandering why its the women that end up single and waiting....... The men are always excused. why is it always so? I would be happy to watch a movie where it was too late for the man cos the woman had moved on. I wanna watch that kind of movie.

@CC, na you watch nollywood pass, please suggest names abeg

When CC comes up from under the sheets gasping for air, she "might" respond - but don't hold your breath sha!

Kobojunkie: ^^ That one na lie. You never forget.. . . It is a LIE that "Time heals all wounds" . . . . Nope! That is a bloody lie! That some people are good at NUMBING their minds and pretending it all didn't happen does not mean they are healed or have forgotten. Wake the same woman up tomorrow and scare her with a story that her husband's mistress is back again, you go see "mamywater" surface . . ROFLMAO!!

LMAO. But Naija movies do not extend to that kind of scene nowwww or maybe they cut such scenes out before release. It always ends with the woman smiling and shaming the devil cos she's back with her stray dog husband

Efemena_xy:

When CC comes up from under the sheets gasping for air, she "might" respond - but don't hold your breath sha!

Haba, her son and Usain Bolt daughter just came first in school and relay race. She needs to thank her man for a job well done.

jidegirl12:

I guess you are the one getting emotional....ANNIE DON RUN COMMOT SEF...they just fit each other thats my message!

Lol! Not really.

If you don your nairaland goggles, you'll see that our dear "annie", is the guest on this thread...

Efemena_xy:

Lol! Not really.

If you don your nairaland goggles, you'll see that our dear "annie", is the guest on this thread...

lol...Annie! That name's kind of familiar! yeah at NL googles(abi how I for do?)..I'm on call tonight...at work... very very grumpy...minus20degrees outside with windchill ...I'm supposed to be in bed.

jennykadry:

LMAO. But Naija movies do not extend to that kind of scene nowwww or maybe they cut such scenes out before release. It always ends with the woman smiling and shaming the devil cos she's back with her stray dog husband

Of course dem go even try glamorize cases where the man comes back debilitated or even with AIDS too. I think I saw a Nigerian movie like that a couple of years ago . . . man leaves children and wife, and runs off to spend his money on whores. He makes it back 25 years later, sick and weak(I think he had AIDs or something serious like that too). The family threw a party(by this time the abandoned wife was rich herself), and the end was the woman at a party with her husband, dressed in the same colors, following close behind.

I don't watch Nigerian movies anymore . . . I can't stand so many of the stupid plots and stories. Every single time I have tried to sit to watch one of those Nigerian movies, I feel the need to tear someone a new one.

It's so funny the hypocricy being displayed here by the advocates of divorce. Don't you guys think that this man's wife equally deserves some level of 'happiness' and needs to divorce the slowpoke of a husband as she is currently being abused emotionally? Moreso, as most of you guys are advocates of divorce (some even opined that vows made are mere 'cultural thingy'), don't you think Annie and her baby deserves to be happy as the vows made by the man are mere cultural and not really binding?

Not again?!!!

Mr Warrior...why Debrief now....you know what just forget it! I'm done here! Bunch old crunchies of BULLIES!!!

jidegirl12: Mr Warrior...why Debrief now....you know what just forget it! I'm done here! Bunch old crunchies of BULLIES!!!

Hey! The last time I checked, I still have the right to voice out my observations and concerns. This is a section I frequent regularly(most times as an observer) and I noticed the level of hypocrisy here is so appalling. Don't you think what is good for the goose is equally good for the gander?

Hey why not...Go ahead.

Thanks Jidegirl and Airpure ..

No I'm not only givin kudos to posts that seems to be on my side , I just feel they get where I'm coming from

No , we never fought infront of our child cos we broke up before I gave birth , yes he was with me throughout the birth , he took us home from the hospital ...
I remember him leaving that night and I so wanted to say something , like please stay n he was lingering too , but I didnt n he left ..

This is not a classic boy dumps pregnant girl , it's more silly pregnant woman tells her man to leave because she thinks she Halle Berry .. Lool
I was stupid !

If I told u guys this story a year ago , u will think I was painting a monster , up until then , I didn't think I was wrong , but i felt like a cloth lifted off my face , I'm like who was that woman , that did sll this he even told me , I got so angry one day n threw a plum (canned tomato)at him n broke his lip

I did all those but I conveniently forgot them while talking to friends n family ..

Now I know my wrongs n I thought this was a chance to correct it cos I can never be that woman again .

But u r all right , he's a married man !

I've told him , I won't be getting involved and it's best we let it go and he should go sort things out with his wife ..

He said .. Ok , u never really liked me anyway , and we go after what we want in life as no one is going to do it for us , and If i could apply the way I am in my professional life to my person life , then I will always get what I want

I said , well , that dosent excuse the fact , u r married , u should have thought of all these before u got married ..

He didn't say anything ..

So with that said , will try n move on again !

deols: I see many married women here thinking,what if that other woman is me? .they are being overly emotional.

What if divorce is d best thing for the other lady. Being married to a man who wants to be with some1 else isnt a good thing IMO. What if the divorce is best for her while Annie gets to be with the man.

I think Annie deseves to be happy and I really had this likeness for her from her first post btw.

There is soooo much wrong wit ur post. I wanted to comment but decided it's too late to change ur morals. I can only imagine u see urself in Annie . At least learn from her mistake.

jennykadry: May EX girlfriends snatch the husbands and boyfriends of all the women supporting this rubbish. What a shame. Tufiakwa

Lol pls have mercy on them.

I always wonder when I see women with 2 or 3 kids for a man that's happily married now I know why.

Airpure:
Whoa I always tot u were morally balanced am surprised that u now think it right for her to sleep with a married man n think it justified that he should divorce his wife.

i suggest you go to specsavers before reading my post
where exactly did i advise her to sleep with a married man? i said she should only allow any sëxual contact after the ex has completed his divorce with his wife!

What if d other lady was ur Sis n she innocently got tangled in this mess. M sure if d wife comes n post on NL that her husband is leaving her for another man u will say go fight. Op has made her mistake she should live with it n not destroy an innocent woman's home.

i'd never let my sister marry a babyfather to start with so she can never get into this mess while i am still alive. op did not make any mistake - the ex came back to rekindle what they used to have......there's a mutual feeling between the two. if the ex can go through the courts to seek divorce then i see no reason why the op and her ex cannot get back. you said the op has made a mistake? a child is not a mistake so learn to word your comments properly!

Also this is a very good case study. The OP have said while they were together they were always at each others throat being abusive with F words n all. M guessing sometimes in the presence of their son. We ve alway preached look be4 u leap in marriage n here all d negative signs r present. Wats d possibility this marriage if they get married won't end up in violence or divorce.

they have both learnt lessons
you cannot compare their level of maturity back in the days to what gives now. there's a child involved so all the F words or C words would cease. you guys seem to be missing the single most important factor here: why is the ex scheming to get the op back if he's in love with his wife?

can you guys not see this is a marriage of convenience similar to people who marry to get the green card? the ex married to spite the op - there was no love in the union. a man in love with his wife would not see his ex barely a month into the marriage - think people and stop shaming nigeria with this obtuse reasoning!

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Annie, I sent u an email.

Annie1: Thanks Jidegirl and Airpure ..

No I'm not only givin kudos to posts that seems to be on my side , I just feel they get where I'm coming from

No , we never fought infront of our child cos we broke up before I gave birth , yes he was with me throughout the birth , he took us home from the hospital ...
I remember him leaving that night and I so wanted to say something , like please stay n he was lingering too , but I didnt n he left ..

This is not a classic boy dumps pregnant girl , it's more silly pregnant woman tells her man to leave because she thinks she Halle Berry .. Lool
I was stupid !

If I told u guys this story a year ago , u will think I was painting a monster , up until then , I didn't think I was wrong , but i felt like a cloth lifted off my face , I'm like who was that woman , that did sll this he even told me , I got so angry one day n threw a plum (canned tomato)at him n broke his lip

I did all those but I conveniently forgot them while talking to friends n family ..

Now I know my wrongs n I thought this was a chance to correct it cos I can never be that woman again .

But u r all right , he's a married man !

I've told him , I won't be getting involved and it's best we let it go and he should go sort things out with his wife ..

He said .. Ok , u never really liked me anyway , and we go after what we want in life as no one is going to do it for us , and If i could apply the way I am in my professional life to my person life , then I will always get what I want

I said , well , that dosent excuse the fact , u r married , u should have thought of all these before u got married ..

He didn't say anything ..

So with that said , will try n move on again !

married man my white butt!
no happily married man would kiss his ex a month into his marriage - ask all the married women here if their husbands did the same a month into their marriage. you are the reason this dude went on to marry what was available for him to marry - i can conclude there's no love between them. even if you don't want him again, it's only a matter of time before he kicks his wife out - your ex is not happy in his marriage! a month in marriage and he's already sailing sideways.....when he should be connecting flights from hawaii to florida keys with his wife playing with sand on the beach....

coogar:

married man my white butt!
no happily married man would kiss his ex a month into his marriage - ask all the married women here if their husbands did the same a month into their marriage. you are the reason this dude went on to marry what was available for him to marry - i can conclude there's no love between them. even if you don't want him again, it's only a matter of time before he kicks his wife out - your ex is not happy in his marriage! a month in marriage and he's already sailing sideways.....when he should be connecting flights from hawaii to florida keys with his wife playing with sand on the beach....

Don't mind them abeg! 2/4

jidegirl12:

Don't mind them abeg! 2/4

So because he kissed his ex, he is no longer married? I really don't get what you are on at all. "Anne" clearly tells you HE IS MARRIED . . . but somehow you don't think that is enough of a reason for her to back down? What rule states that only "HAPPILY" married people are MARRIED?

Kobojunkie:

So because he kissed his ex, he is no longer married? I really don't get what you are on at all. "Anne" clearly tells you HE IS MARRIED . . . but somehow you don't think that is enough of a reason for her to back down? What rule states that only "HAPPILY" married people are MARRIED?

You are mis quoting me....I don't know why I am still here...I am just been 100% and I am taking a very bad hit for it!

jidegirl12:

You are mis quoting me....I don't know why I am still here...I am just been 100% and I am taking a very bad hit for it!

I didn't misquote you. You hi-fived a silly post suggesting that one is LESS married if one is not "Happily" married, and so I had to ask what the heck you are on even thinking that makes sense in any world.

What does it matter if their is love or not in the marriage, as long as they are married, they are MARRIED, and "Anne" there tells you that. Yet you there hi-five an inane suggestion that a marriage without love or happiness is somehow a marriage you are FREE to DESTROY as you see fit.

Kobojunkie:
I didn't misquote you. You hi-fived a silly post suggesting that one is LESS married if one is not "Happily" married, and so I had to ask what the heck you are on even thinking that makes sense in any world.

oh shut your trap, you sad dejected soul - whose post are you referring to as silly.....mistress of the universe, if you are this smart about marriage issues, why are you a divorcee? misery loves company! you want to drag annie1 into your own level of unhappiness and loneliness?

What does it matter if their is love or not in the marriage, as long as they are married, they are MARRIED, and "Anne" there tells you that. Yet you there hi-five an inane suggestion that a marriage without love or happiness is somehow a marriage you are FREE to DESTROY as you see fit.

it matters because the ex is the father of her child! it matters because the 2 are still in love with each other and it also matters because she didn't ask for this to happen, it was the ex that rekindled the splint of love. she's human, she made mistakes and for the sake of her child, she wants a father figure in her son's life! if that's too much for you to digest, then get a long rope, find a strong beam to tie it to and climb on a stool.......

you are the last person that should be advising anyone about marriage - you woefully failed at yours!!!

He kissed her a year after marriage.

@Annie
I dont know you but I like you and honestly I wish you well, I really do. You are smart and I love that.

Bye bye y'all

ROFLMAO!!!!

Like I said . . . .

Kobojunkie:

I didn't misquote you. You hi-fived a silly post suggesting that one is LESS married if one is not "Happily" married, and so I had to ask what the heck you are on even thinking that makes sense in any world.

What does it matter if their is love or not in the marriage, as long as they are married, they are MARRIED, and "Anne" there tells you that. Yet you there hi-five an inane suggestion that a marriage without love or happiness is somehow a marriage you are FREE to DESTROY as you see fit.